


I Just Miss A Good Cup Of Tea

by EJelly



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Action & Romance, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Zombie Apocalypse, Angst, Badass Mikasa Ackerman, Camp, F/M, Fluff, Horror, Levi swears a lot, Mikasa has a sense of humour in this, OCs - Freeform, POV Multiple, Slow Burn, Strangers to Lovers, Young Eren, apocalypse calls for swearing, but worth it, early apocalypse days, i guess, kinda funny, quite right too, reaaaallly slow, rivamika, sassymikasa, stupid humour, they're nice OC's
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-02-10
Updated: 2019-01-23
Packaged: 2019-03-16 02:32:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 20
Words: 130,105
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13626726
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EJelly/pseuds/EJelly
Summary: "Where did you find him?" Furlan's knelt down to be face to face with the kid."Crouched down in some music store in the foetal position." I’m leaning on the railings clasping the bridge of my nose, I can feel one hell of a head ache coming on. Jean moves to give the boy a bottle of water who just looks at him suspiciously, not showing any indication of taking it.I sigh."Jesus Christ kid, you think if we wanted to kill you we’d waste a perfectly good bottle of water doing so." My tone is simultaneously strained and bored at the same time, a life time talent."I think what Levi is trying to say, is- we won’t hurt you. You're safe now but we do need you to tell us a bit about why you’re here?"Mikasa and her younger brother Eren are saved by a small group of survivors from becoming another addition to the walking dead scene. The two are taken back to a growing refugee camp outside the city's limits and need to learn to become part of a new community. Eren, taking no time at all to win the people over with his beaming smile, leaves Mikasa struggling to connect with anybody, and feeling alone in this new grueling world, she finds company in the most unlikely of individuals.





	1. When It All Went To Shit

**Author's Note:**

> So I've been putting off posting this for a while cause god knows I don't have time to take on another project right now, but hey, who needs sleep really.  
> Another zombie AU which nobody asked for but I wrote anyway. I love RivaMika (I do love Ereri too) but decided there weren't nearly enough fics for them!

(Mikasa POV)

I always wondered what would rush into my head in my final, lonely thoughts before death… I thought maybe, you know, some treasured memories, a bright light… my loved ones telling me how much they loved me. But no, none of this is happening. Through the overwhelming panic and bellowing groans above me, the only thing that slips through is… Phil Collins?- My dying thoughts are Phil Collins apparently?

-2 hours before-

"Eren we need to get in and out within the next 20 minutes, grab whatever you need from the lower level and meet me back at the water fountain… okay?" I stress the last word for a response to make sure my younger brother heard what I said.

"Okay!? Eren?"

"Yes Okay I heard you, 20 minutes, lower level, water fountain, got it!" Eren gives me a nonchalant shrug then spins around and follows it up with two rather condescending thumbs up. He then runs off towards the closest clothing store.

We had been travelling south for a few weeks now and it’s been a while since we’d had a chance to restock on necessities like clothes and practical footwear. I look down at my worn trainers and immediately seek out the closest shoe store. I had made sure we circled the mall at least ten times before we checked out the inside. It seemed someone had barricaded the main entrance and tried to deter any undead from entering a while back.

It was quiet...

I walk into the shoe shop, making a point to peek in on Eren, now casing the aisles of a book store. I find a nice pair of black boots. Lobbing my trainers over the counter I slip them on and do up the laces. They should wear in pretty quick but I’ll need to be careful of blisters.

I decided we should stick to the ground floor since it seems too big a risk to head up into the higher levels in case there’s a problem. I noticed four different possible exits in case we ran into trouble, there’s out the back through the staff room, the fire exit next to Starbucks, a broken window inside a dilapidated Gap and, of course, the main entrance. That would be a bit risky though since I knew for a _fact_ there were plenty of wanderers outside. All of the manual doors at the front were chained shut but there was a creaky rotating door that was wedged with only a small piece of plywood.

I stop at a map of the shopping mall, a rather boisterous red arrow declared where I was and I follow it round to find any other useful stores. The lower level consisted of mainly clothing stores, the second had DVD, music stores and the top was just a food outlet. I was tempted to risk the journey up to forage for food but decided against it. It was still closed off and I didn’t know what I might find there, besides I couldn’t leave Eren alone for too long.

Eren…I pinch the bridge of my nose. I am worried about him; we haven’t really had a chance to talk about a lot of things since we left home and he’s always been impulsive, reckless and difficult to keep out of trouble.

I’m so tired...

I head to one of the women’s clothing shops and replace my jacket with one of a heavier material. Autumns fully kicked in now and I don’t want to get cold, which reminds me, I need to tell Eren to pick up a decent coat whilst we’re here. He’ll probably protest but getting sick could be a death sentence now.

Since there isn’t anything of much use on the lower levels beyond clothing, I head back to Eren. I find him sitting on the edge of the water fountain reading a comic he must have taken from the book store, surprised he _actually_ listened to me. I wander over.

"Did you get everything you needed?" He asks me without looking up from his comic.

"Yeah …you?" He looks up at me and grins so wide I almost forget about the whole apocalypse thing going on outside.

"Amazing spider Man, New 52, Issue 7. I really wanted this one. Armin got it for his birthday in the summer but…" Eren shrugs"...never got a chance to borrow it..." His grin fades away after mentioning his friend...

I don’t say anything.

It’s been two months since everyone we loved was taken from us. Two months since people started eating other people and everything on the streets became up for grabs. Eren and I fled our home after both our parents were killed in the initial wave of panic. I think it was Mrs Mayfield from next door that got them.

So it’s just been me and Eren, my ten year old brother, for 58 days now. But we’ve done alright, so far at least...

"So now what?" Eren stands up and gives me a pointed look, far too measured for a ten year old. It’s a reasonable question. We can’t keep travelling forever, we need to find somewhere to hold up for at least a while, find some people...

"I guess we just keep heading south and hope that…" I’m stopped abruptly mid-sentence by a loud crash out the far end of the mall. Eren immediately stands up straighter and we turn towards the noise.

"What was that?" Eren whispers, a new habit which took weeks drilling into him.

"I don’t know but...I…I’ll check it out." I’ve always been a strong person, independent, protective, but in these past two months I’ve seen things that have taken their toll. I’m tired and both my body and mind are feeling the pressure.

I’m scared, but I have a responsibility as the older sister to keep my brother safe.

I walk slowly towards the other end of the mall, in the direction the crash sounded...

It’s so quiet...

The first one appeared from behind a sale sign for pinup dresses, the second, not far behind, and then they were coming from everywhere. Three out of four of my escape routes were compromised and I didn’t have a lot of time to think. I grab Eren’s hand and run towards the closest escalator. It had been barricaded but I lift Eren over the crammed up furniture, carefully avoiding the sharp edge of the broken shelves.

I can just about keep hold of Eren’s hand once he’s over and I squeeze with all my strength, making him look me in the eye.

"Run up to the next level and find somewhere to hide okay, I’m gonna try and lead them out. Once it’s clear I’ll, I... I’ll circle back inside and find you okay?!" I nod rapidly."Eren?! Okay?" I squeeze his hand again.

"Okay." His eyes are wide and I can see the fear settle in again. As soon as I let his hand go I run in the other direction and hear him climb the escalator. When I look over my shoulder, I see a swarm filling the mall and keep running towards the main entrance.

When I reach there I’ll head straight to the revolving door, I’ll get out and smash the windows to the other doors. Whilst they get out I’ll run up the side of the building and wait for them to disperse down the street, then head back.

Once I get inside the revolving door, two more bodies appear from the outside. I manage to stop the door just in time to block them out, but then realise I’m trapped. The wanderers from inside the mall have reached the door and I’m sandwiched between a rock and a decaying hard place. The pressure on the inside door is significantly larger as there’s at least ten times the bodies pushing against it. The rotting corpses smear the class until it’s completely covered with hands and blood.

I have to sit down and push against the inside whilst keeping an eye on the other door. The slightest off pressure and they could swing one way or the other, letting what’s outside in. The discourse from me is attracting the attention of more and more wanderers from the outside. Mixture of fear and frustration turn into tears that begin to run down my face as I watch more and more bodies gather around outside.

I’m trapped…

And I’m so tired...

Then out of the silence I hear a yelping scream that is cut off abruptly, my mind panics for Eren, but it sounded too feminine to be my brother.

 

(First POV Furlan)

We’ve been driving for about forty five minutes, a trip that would usually take no more than twenty but, hey, we stay on the cautious side in this truck. We should have checked up on the building a lot sooner than now, it’s held together well as far as we know since we chained the front entrance up. But who knows who, or what, could have snuck in since then.

"… I just don’t understand why the little shits had to come with us?" Levi's quiet and bored remark brings me back from my thoughts.

"Erwin wants a decent number of hands to help collect supplies; it’s an easy and sure run so they’re fine for the job." Levi’s only response is a subtle eye roll towards the window where his attention stays.

"Hey, are we nearly there?" Connie’s head appears from between the seat backs, his hands grabbing the corner of our chairs.

"Yeah, pretty much round the corner, I’ll drive up to the end of the street so we can stake out the front. It’s usually relatively quiet but just to be sure." Connie smiles but I see Levi glaring at his hand on our chairs in warning, causing Connie to shrink away.

"You know it wouldn’t kill you to be a little bit warmer towards the younger campers." I give Levi a pointed look.

"I don’t know Furlan; I’ve been on deaths door for a lot less." And that I could quite believe.

"I’m just saying…what the fuck!?" I stop the car abruptly and see a dark crowd around the main entrance of the mall. Walkers are surrounding the vast majority of the entrance which has never been a problem before.

"We’ll go round the back." Levi says it like we’ve just stumbled across a large puddle, so I do. I put the car into gear and head round the back of the building as slowly and quietly as possible. Everyone in the truck has gone quiet, holding their breath until I’m able to park the truck in a desolate space out the back. Levi immediately gets out the truck door, prompting everyone else into motion.

"What the hell do you think could have triggered this?" I hunch down and whisper to Levi whilst he goes through his equipment.

"Why should I know?" He doesn’t even look up.

The younger campers are all out now checking their guns. Connie picks up an old piece of cloth from the mud soaked ground and chucks it at Sasha, who, in her panic, lets out a high pitch yelp, which is swiftly cut off by Levi.

There’s a deafening silence that follows, everyone waiting for some kind of reaction, either from the undead or Levi himself.

They’re all just as nervous either way...

Levi rips his hand away and turns towards the mall.

"We’re gonna go up the back fire escape which Hange and I fastened closed last time we were here. Sasha and Connie are gonna watch the truck, Ymir will watch the door, leaving Jean, Furlan and myself to scout out the second floor to find out what the fuck is happening. _Got it?_ " Everyone nods, not daring to protest against their given position.

 

(Levi First POV)

Ymir uses the chain cutter from the back of the truck and opens the fire door. I head in first and I’m met with a dimly lit corridor and soft groaning, it sounds like there are more on this level than there were last time I was here. Fuck! This was supposed to be a quick in-out operation and now it’s all gone to shit.

I run my hand through my hair and sigh.

"Alright Furlan, you and Jean take the left side and I’ll go right. Get a good view point and find out what’s going on down stairs." I don’t wait for a response and head off in my direction. Furlan is more than capable of taking care of any walkers he comes across and Jean, even though he can be fucking annoying, seems proficient enough.

  
I take it slow, checking every store. There are a considerable number of walkers but they’re evened out enough to not turn into a hoard… yet. I turn into a music store and kill two walkers with one swift kick to the ground and a knife in the head.

Disgusting.

I grimace as I wipe my knife onto the underside of my boot.

"Fucking bullshit..." I mutter it under my breath as I turn to leave the shop, when a quiet sob comes out from behind the counter. I take my gun out and slowly make my way around the aisles to the back of the room. I’m quiet, not to startle who, or whatever is hidden away.

I cringe when I step on a discarded CD case, looking down I see Phil Collins face split into a hundred little pieces. Bollocks, what kind of _bullshit_ rookie move was that Levi? The quiet sobs stop sharply and I decided to just rip off the band aid.

I step swiftly round the counter and point my gun at… a kid? What the hell?

 

 

"Where did you find him?" Furlan's knelt down to be face to face with the kid.

"Crouched down in some music store in the foetal position." I’m leaning on the railings, clasping the bridge of my nose and I can feel one hell of a head ache coming on. Jean moves to give the boy a bottle of water who just looks at him suspiciously, not showing any indication of taking the bottle.

I sigh.

"Jesus Christ kid, you think if we wanted to kill you we’d waste a _perfectly_ good bottle of water _doing_ so." My tone is simultaneously strained and bored at the same time, a life time talent.

"I think what Levi is _trying_ to say, is- we won’t hurt you. Your safe now but we do need you to tell us a bit about why you’re here?" Furlan jumps on damage control immediately.

The boy looks like he’s having some internal debate until he gives into the water. Taking the offering, he chugs it down and noticeably regains some clarity and calms down before our eyes.

We all stand in silence, an unspoken ‘well?’ falling from our lips.

"I… I came here with my sister..." The boy’s eyes widen as if remembering something. "Sh… she’s still down there!" The last word was strained, on the verge of panic. I peer over the edge of the railing and I can just about make out the end of the hoard toward the front of the mall.

"Doesn’t look good kid..." I say it matter of factly.

"Levi!" Furlan glares at me but I shrug it off. "What happened?" He looks to the boy again.

"We came in here to look for a few bits before we set off again but... before we could go there was a hoard that came from around the back. My sister sent me up the escalator and sh… she was gonna try lure them out the front, circle around and come back to get me but… something must have gone wrong. The hoard there hasn’t moved for ages." Eren looks down at the floor.

"The hoard out the front." Furlan looks up at me as he says it.

"She must have met walkers out the front before she could escape the ones behind her." Jean decides to chime into the conversation and Furlan looks up at me again.

"There’s no way anyone can get out of that situation."

"MIKASA CAN, she _can,_ I know she’s still down there..!" Eren snaps his head back up.

 

(Erens POV)

I can feel my pulse rise significantly after I snap at them; I’m trying really hard to stop the sob desperately clinging to the back of my throat.

"Look kid..." The younger guy, who looks kinda like a horse, begins talking, but is swiftly cut off by the man who found me.

"No, the kids right." The other two men look at him like he just admitted to starting the apocalypse himself, but he ignores this. "The amount of walkers that are still down _there…_ " He gestures lazily in the direction of the wanderers. "… that’s too many for a dead body. They're clasping onto something that’s still got a pulse."

I can feel hope swell in my chest...

"How could she possibly still be alive down there!?" The taller one with dirty blonde hair stands to look the shorter man in the eye.

"Well, I can only think of one place she could be riding it out." He starts towards the further end of the mall, assuming that we'll just follow him.

Which we do...

We crouch down against more railings, which gives us a clearer view of the front doors. I sit next to the shorter, scarier man who the blond called Levi. He seems to give off this sense of confidence which could make the most uneasy of situations seem like a cake walk. He scrutinizes the scene in front of us, looking out towards the open space. I look up at him and watch his sharp grey eyes watch some hypothetical scene unfold in his head. He doesn’t seem the least bit deterred by the circumstances. I look up at the blond man who was nice to me and I realise...I was actually really lucky to have run into these people. They’ve been pretty nice to me so far, well, Levi seems a bit blunt but I get the feeling that’s just his personality.

"My name’s Eren by the way!" It comes out in a rush and they all look at me, somewhat surprised when I blurt it out. Levi just raises his eyebrows and looks back out to the ground floor but Furlan gives me a warm smile.

"It’s nice to meet you Eren, wish the circumstances could have been a bit better, but…" He chuckles. "My name’s Furlan, this is Jean…" He gestures towards the horse face. "…and that’s Levi. He can come across as a bit cold but he has a warm fuzzy side, somewhere, apparently, I haven’t actually seen it myself, but that’s what Hange says." Jean chuckles at that, but Levi shoots him a quick glare, shutting him up.

It’s quiet for a few more minutes, but I find it really hard not to keep asking...

"Do you know what happened to my sister?" I look to Levi and he sighs.

"The only way I can think that your sister is in there is if she trapped herself inside the revolving door. Keep a balanced pressure and it could keep her safe for... a while." He goes quiet again.

"Do you know how we can get my sister out?" I whisper it, but I can hear the desperation slip through.

"Eren there’s still no guarantee that your sister is alive in there..." Furlan’s voice is gentle. "… we’re grasping at straws that we don’…"

"We’ll get her out Eren; I just need to think for a minute." Levi looks to me, jaw set but eyes steady. He then looks up at the blond as if challenging him to speak again; but Furlan doesn’t bother, Levi having the final say.

"Okay, so here’s what’s gonna happen…" A few more minutes go by before Levi sits up and gets our attention. "Furlan, I want you to head back to the truck - update the others on the situation then I want you to drive up to meet Jean when he comes out the back. Once they're out, I want you to drive round to the east side entrance…"

"But that was blocked off _weeks_ ago, no one can get through it…" Furlan interrupts but Levi swiftly continues.

"Yeah I know, but I’ll need you to be there anyway. Park directly outside the door but at least..." He thinks for a second. "...six feet from the curb, got it?" Furlan nods, all confidence restored in his friend. Levi then turns to Jean.

"Jean, I need you to wait by the escalator closest to the entrance, you’re gonna retrieve Eren’s sister..."

"Mikasa…! My sister’s name is Mikasa." I butt in -my voice wobbly. For some reason it’s important to me that they know who she is, as if it paints her more as someone they know, rather than another body they have to save. Levi looks at me and nods, which calms my heartrate down.

 _"Mikasa_ … once the walkers have moved." Jean nods, looking out towards the escalator he’ll be stationed at to wait. Levi stands up, a silent gesture for the rest of us to move. "Oh and Furlan, take Eren with you." Furlan nods, getting ready to go and my heartrate picks up _again._ I turn to look up at Levi.

"What are _you_ gonna do!?" He stops what he’s doing, looks down at me and shrugs.

"I’m gonna start a big ass distraction and give them something to chase."


	2. Phil Collins Saves the Day

(Mikasa First POV)

My legs are so tired and I think I must have cut my upper arm when I lifted Eren over the escalator. Somehow I’ve lost quite a bit of blood and the burning in my thighs is almost a welcomed distraction from the loud groans surrounding me. I don’t know how long I’ve been stuck in the door but I'd _quite_ like to get out now.

The Phil Collins suddenly gets louder and I’m not so sure it’s all in my head anymore.

God I hope Eren’s okay...

There’s another loud crash in the distance and the music gets louder still. What the hell is going on? Just when I think my legs are about to give way, the wanderers on the inside door begin to disperse. I’m momentarily dumbfounded then I begin to feel the outer door start to give so I immediately throw my weight against it. With half the problem walking away, I try to rack my brain into coming up with some kind of plan.

But I’m still so tired...

I squeeze my eyes closed.

"Mikasa? Mikasa?... MIKASA!?" Someone’s shouting my name.

"Eren?" I open my eyes and see a tall man in front of me with short tan blond hair. He looks to be about my age, maybe a bit younger.

"Mikasa, my names Jean, we need to go whilst Levi has them distracted!" He begins to pull me up and makes us sprint towards the closest escalator. My legs are burning but I let him lead me over the furniture and up the steps without protest, the wanderers already beginning to barge through the front.

Once we reach the top I have to stop, but Jean encourages me to keep moving, saying we need to meet Furlan, whoever Furlan is. I look out over the mall and see the large wave of bodies heading towards the sound of Phil Collins playing in the distance.

Who knew zombies were such big 'Genesis' fans...

I could feel my body shutting down, as soon as my legs didn’t have to push on that door anymore I had already begun to give into the fatigue. I couldn’t go on anymore. My legs buckle and the young man catches me just in time. I remember asking about Eren moments before my eyes close and the mall goes dark.

 

(Furlan POV)

I grabbed Eren and immediately went to the back exit we entered earlier on, seeing Ymir guarding as Levi had instructed. I ran with Eren to Connie and Sasha in the truck, promptly filling everyone in on what had happened. I jumped in the truck whilst the others helped Eren calm down in the back, putting the vehicle back into gear, I glide it steadily closer to the door. I make sure Ymir stays waiting, ready to lock the door behind Jean when he arrives back here with Eren’s sister.

That’s if Levi’s plan works...

There’s a lot of noise coming from inside the mall now and I know it’s gonna start attracting unwanted attention from around the area.

What the hell are you doing Levi?

I can finally see Ymir running with Jean towards the truck. He appears to be carrying Eren’s sister, suggesting she’s a little worse for wear, but I need to know how worse. When they reach the truck, I immediately jump out before any sweet reunion can take place, stopping Eren with my arm.

"Is she bit?!" I state it desperately, knowing we don’t have much time since I need to go to the next destination.

"Furlan we don’t have time for this!" Ymir steps forward.

"We always check! Levi would insist if he was here." I look at Jean, who responds hurriedly.

"NO! No, I swear I checked her over, she’s just tired. She must have been keeping those walkers off her for nearly an hour, the girl just collapsed from exhaustion." I nod and gesture for him to get her in the back.

"Okay...right lets go, we need to meet Levi." Jean and Ymir get Mikasa in the back, laying her down carefully. I get in the truck then turn around in my seat. Honestly, a big part of me hadn't been convinced Levi and Jean would get her out alive.

"Mikasa, are you okay, M-Mikasa?" Eren kneels over his sister but she’s out cold.

"It’s okay Eren, she’s gonna be fine. She’s clearly strong." Sasha kneels down next to Eren and begins to inspect his sister’s condition.

Time to get moving...

 

It’s been a good 10 minutes we’ve been waiting out the east side door, but there’s still no sign of Levi. I wish I knew what the hell he’s planning on doing to get out of there.  
  
"What the hell is _going on…?"_ Ymir’s head appears from out the back. "What the hell is he gonna _do,_ all of the doors are either locked or compromised by those fucking things. As soon as he caused that distraction he rang the dinner bell." I sigh, rubbing my hands over my face. We can’t sit here much longer, the walkers will start coming round the building soon once it starts to calm down more inside. A small voice in my head wonders if something's happened to compromise Levi's plan.

Wonders if he’s hurt…

or dead...

No, I’ve only known the man less than two months but I’ve seen him get out of shittier situations. I’ve learnt to never stop being surprised by what that short son of a bitch can do.

Ymir leans back to join the others and I turn around to see how everyone's doing. They’ve moved Mikasa to the side and Connie bundles up a coat, placing it under her head, whilst Sasha half-hazardly tightens a bandage around her upper arm. Everyone has a tense look on their face, all thinking the same thing -wondering if he’s dead. Levi isn’t the most popular person at our camp for sure, in fact, a lot of people wanted him out at the beginning, but at least everyone _here_ knows what he’s done for our group. The camp would suffer hugely if we lost Levi, even if most people didn’t realise it yet. I’m about to say something to help raise spirits when a chorus of moans makes everyone freeze.

"Two more minutes and we have to leave!" The words taste bitter in my mouth.

"NO! We have to wait for Levi!" Eren surprises everyone looking up from his shrunken position. "He _said_ he’d be here so he’ll be here!" I see a look of determination in the kid’s eyes and I find it quite contagious. I nod and everyone else gives mutterings of agreement.

We’ll wait as long as it takes then...

Which turns out to _not_ be that long actually.

I hear a loud smash from above us and before I can stick my head out to investigate, a violent thud comes from directly above me. I turn to look out the back in time to see Levi slide off the truck roof and onto the floor with the grace of a cat.

He turns to look at me, same bored expression on his face and just a little out of breath.

"Are you gonna fucking drive then?"

 

(Levi POV)

I manage to land on top of the truck without breaking every bone in my body and slide onto the floor. I look up to see all of the younger campers staring at me, mouths agape and I turn to Furlan in the driver’s seat.

"Are you gonna fucking drive then?" It was about to get pretty crowded around here if we didn’t leave soon. He immediately pulls away and I slump against the side of the truck.

"I _knew_ you’d make it!" A heavy weight slams into me and I feel two shaky arms wrap around my waist. Since I’m not use to such forward contact I freeze and then realize they’re Eren’s arms. I slowly lift my own to steady his quaking shoulders."Thank you for saving my sister, thank you so so much!" Eren buries his head deeper into my side, his voice breaking from emotion. 

I sigh and remove my hands from his shoulders.

"I told you we’d get her out, didn’t I?" I try to sound ever so slightly insulted by his lack of confidence, but I don't mean it. I look down at Eren and realise he’s already staring up at me, eyes blurry with tears and I gently remove his arms from around my waist as I become slightly uncomfortable. Everyone else in the back has gone quiet, no doubt taken aback by Eren’s forward nature towards someone such as myself. I look up and I can see smirks on their faces, which are promptly removed when they see me glaring.

God, I’m fucking tired...

I slide down gradually until I’m sat on the floor. I wouldn’t usually dream of doing something so disgusting but drastic times, right?

I finally look over at Eren’s sister. She looks like she’s out cold with a cut to her upper right arm, but apart from that she looks to be in one piece. From a quick scan of her features I find it hard to believe her and Eren are related by blood, she’s clearly very beautiful and looks as if she shares a significant age gap with her brother – at least a good fifteen years. Eren heads back over to sit beside her.

"Are you alright Sir, you’re not hurt or anything are you?" Sasha looks down and asks me gingerly, avoiding direct eye contact. She may be a shitty brat but she’s alright, although I hate it when they call me Sir. There’s nothing written down anywhere to say I’m their superior and last time people called me Sir it either got them killed or thrown behind bars.

"I’m fine thank you Braus." I nod at her and stand up. Turning around, I effortlessly manoeuvre myself through the back window of the truck and into the seat next to Furlan. I lean back heavily, letting my head roll onto the back of the chair.

"You _jumped_ out of a bloody window..." It was said as a statement rather than a question. I open one eye and stare at Furlan as he watches the road.

"Well I couldn’t have exactly used the _fucking_ door now _could_ I?" I really wasn’t looking forward to recounting all of this to Erwin, following his orders still makes my skin crawl. "Besides... it was getting crowded in there anyway." I shrug my shoulders, closing my eyes again.

"You could have DIED Levi, I’m serious." He lowers to a whisper. "It was too big of a risk for a stranger, a stranger we didn’t even _know_ was still alive or not."

"Look Furlan, as far as I see it, anyone with enough will to survive in that kind of fucking predicament deserves a bit of help. Nothing went wrong, so I don’t really see the problem." I’m sat up now, a bit of edge to my voice.

"The problem is that it COULD have gone wrong!" Furlan’s jaw is set but he keeps a straight eye on the road. I take a deep breath and let it out in a sigh, I’m feeling tired, frustrated and just a little bit pissed off now.

I keep my voice steady.

"What’s the fucking point in being left on this piece of _shit_ planet now Furlan if we can’t help people who need it? All those rotting corpses walking around outside… living people are precious, their lives are precious and if I have to cause a bit of a _scene,_ make some fucking _noise_ and sacrifice a few _fucking supplies_ along the way, then so be it." I have to lower my voice to a whisper again. "What are you saying; we should have just left her to be eaten after fighting for so long? Getting what we need and getting out? Living just to survive isn’t living, it’s just existing...and I've spent enough time _just existing."_ I lean back in my seat pinching the bridge of my nose. Furlan’s features have softened, he looks to be having some kind of internal debate when he speaks low, something akin to admiration slipping into his voice.

"You’re right." He glances over to me. "You’re a good man Levi, no matter what some people, _or you_ , may think. You're better than most people left on this piece of shit planet- as you say." He chuckles, looking back to the road and I roll my eyes. What Furlan says unsettles me, before everything happened, he would have been a perfect recruit- Young, ambitious, smart and seeking someone to follow.

I fucked up a lot of lives like Furlan’s...

"I’m not a good person Furlan, and you have no idea what you’re talking about." I don’t look at him and keep my attention out the window. That long awaited headache finally kicking in.

  
(Mikasa POV)  
  
My mind was barely conscious on the road; I could make out the ins and outs of conversations happening around me. I knew I was in a truck of some sorts, surrounded by new people, but I no longer felt an impending threat. I could make out Eren’s voice through the fog in my mind, a girls voice, soothing and tentative and then a man’s voice, deep and calming.

I wake up in a dull lit… room? No, I think I’m in a…tent or something. My head is killing me - a mixture of exhaustion and dehydration no doubt. I try and sit up but a hand stops me, gentle yet assertive.

"Whoa whoa whoooa... Slow down! Don’t want you getting into one of those dizzy spells do we." My eyes travel upwards meeting the bright gaze of a woman. She has long brown hair tied up into a messy ponytail and dark rimmed glasses framing her face.

Where the hell am I?

"Where _am_ I?" My voice sounds raspy from sleep.

"You’re at our camp!" She sounded very excited over this prospect.

Who the hell _is_ this woman?

"Who _are_ you?"

"My name is Hange! I helped Ravi patch you up, you were suffering from quite extreme exhaustion due to the strain on your legs and you had a pretty bad cut on your upper right arm – but that’s all been wrapped up. You’re safe now!" She smiled at me.

Camp...

Safe...

Eren!

"Eren?!" I try to sit up again and she finally lets me get into a comfortable sitting position.

"Oh yes! Your brother, I’ll let him know that you’re awake. He’s already taken very well to the rest of the camp. Quite the charismatic boy, lovely smile… Oh you mean is he okay, yes he’s fine! You were the one brought in unconscious after all. I don’t know what specifically went down at that shopping mall but sounds like quite – a – bother." The woman, Hange, is talking so fast I’m struggling to keep up. "You’ve been out for about forty minutes since Levi and that brought you back."

Just as I’m about to ask the next question hanging from my lips, a new person enters the campervan. He’s very tall, with a beard and from some kind of Indian decent. He looks quite young, about my age – friendly.

"Raviiiii! She’s finally awake and already down to the important questions." Hange turns to me, gesturing to the man who just walked in. "Mikasa! This is Ravi! He’s our camp doctor." Ravi walks over to my bed and sits down on the chair directly in front of me.

"Hello Mikasa, is it fine if I just check a few things? Won’t take long. Hange why don’t you go get Eren and let Erwin know that she’s awake." Hange immediately jumps up and leaves us alone. Ravi turns back to me. "Sorry, she can be a little intense at first but she means well." He chuckles and gestures for my arm to inspect my bandages.

"So you’re a doctor?" I’m genuinely curious since medical expertise are a rare and sort after skill now.

"Well, technically, I’m a junior doctor. I hadn’t quite finished my full training when… you know, everything happened., but I’m as close as they’ve got. Hange’s a psychologist but, not sure that really counts. Levi calls it pseudo bullshit science, so…" He chuckles, smiling awkwardly. He checks my bandages and deems me worthy of a full recovery. I sit up straighter in the small bed.

"So where exactly _am_ I Ravi?" I look down and I can feel the worry lines forming on my forehead.

"You’re inside our camp about ten miles from town. There’s about forty, fifty, of us altogether. It’s run by a man named Erwin, he’s gonna come in and talk to you soon – fill you in on any other blanks you might have."

I’m silent, trying hard to digest everything that’s happened. One minute I was sandwiched between two hordes of rotting bodies,then I was running for my life and... then everything was dark and now… now I’m _safe!?_

No, that’s too fair...

There is no ' _safe'_ anymore... Ravi begins talking again and I wonder if I’ve given away too many emotions on my usually stoic face.

"You know… you really are safe at the moment. We’ve got some pretty incredible people looking out for this camp. Erwin is a good leader, along with Hange …and Furlan runs a pretty damn good supply team. Levi--" My ears perk up at hearing that name again. "--Levi’s our head scouter, probably the most capable person in our camp. He’s…not the most popular but he grows on you once you get to know him." He chuckles again. "That’s if he lets you. Actually, Levi was the one who managed to get you and your brother out of that shopping mall in one piece." Ravi smiles at me and it’s actually quite comforting.

I decide I like Ravi.

I think of my brother and see him running up that escalator. He must have been so scared, what the hell would he have done if I’d died in there?

I _would_ have died in there...

I hear talking coming from outside, disrupting me from my rather disturbing thoughts. Eren’s head appears from behind the door and he peers down the campervan, his eyes landing on me with a look of relief.

"Mikasa!"

He runs up to me, throwing his hands around my neck. I feel an overwhelming sense of relief wash over me and I notice my shoulders release a tension I didn’t even realise they held.

"Eren, I’m so glad you’re okay." I bury my head into his shoulder. "I’m so s-sorry, I shouldn’t have left you but I di… I didn’t know what else to _do!"_ Eren slowly takes my arms from around his shoulders, lifting my head to wipe away a tear that managed to escape.

I haven’t really had a chance to cry since everything happened.

"Mikasa you don’t need to apologise. You made a quick decision in a difficult situation and I was safe _because_ of that." He smiles at me with such an Eren smile, emerald eyes shining. He sounds so much older than his ten years. "Besides, everything worked out pretty well in the end. You’re okay! And we finally found people we can trust to help us."

"Yes – you - have!" Hange appears from behind Eren with a tall blond man beside her. He must be Erwin because he definitely gave off a palpable sense of authority. Eren turns to look at them, smiling still. He gestures towards- who I assume is- Erwin.

"Mikasa, this is Erwin Smith, he runs the camp, making sure everyone is safe." Eren turns to him and gestures to myself. "Erwin, this is my sister. She’s my family and _will_ fight you if you cross her." He keeps his smile.

"Oh really, well we always have room for more fighters in our camp." Erwin looks at me and I’m still trying to decide whether or not to trust this man. Eren seems to and he’s always been a good judge of character – even for a ten year old.

"Glad to hear it." My voice sounds small to my own ears but no one else in the room seems to have picked up on the uneasiness I’m feeling.

"Well! Now that we’re all best friends I think it would be a good idea to get Mikasa and Eren set up somewhere so Mikasa can start to meet a few more people." Hange smiles at me whilst Eren helps me out of bed.

"Sounds like a plan."

Suddenly surrounded by people, I feel more alone than I’ve felt since the beginning.

 

Eren and I get a small three to four person tent down the far end of camp, so I’m told. Whilst being escorted to our new ‘home’ all eyes were on us. I assume Eren’s already met quite a few people as they were all giving him very warm smiles. He’s always been easy to warm up to; he’s likable, talkative, enthusiastic and sometimes downright adorable.

A lot of things that I’m not...

I try hard not to make eye contact with anyone and Eren runs off ahead, clearly already aware of where we’re going.

"So Mikasa, being the new people you might get a bit of attention, but I’ll try make sure they back off at the beginning. I’m gonna send Naomi over some time to meet you as she agreed to show you the ropes a bit." Oh good. "Now it’s a general give and take community. Since you live here you’ll be expected to contribute to general tasks and if you’re up to it, maybe go out scouting a bit – depends what your into I suppose.." Hange continues to talk whilst I look out over the rest of the camp.

There are two lines of campervans and tents aligning the edge of one field. It leaves a wide path down the centre, almost like a high street, with a large campfire in the middle. Some caravans are quite plain but others look like they have been here and set up for a while. Some even with fairy lights hanging up, almost as if they’re trying to bring some kind of normality back to this corpse rotting world through cheap Christmas decorations.

For some people, I guess that’s all they can do...

We pass one campervan which sits quite central to the camp, making me think it might be Erwin’s or Hange’s – or both, it’s not like there’s masses of space. There are two men talking outside it, one with messy blond hair and another with a dark undercut. They appear to be in quite a heated discussion, at least, the blond seems quite upset about something, but the smaller man just looks… _bored_ by the whole thing -like he just hasn’t got time for any of this.

Hange sees me staring and shouts to the young men.

"Furlan! Levi!" she waves at them frantically. "This is Mikasa!" The two men look at me and I immediately look away, not appreciating the attention. The blond, Furlan, walks over to us whilst the shorter man stays where he is.

"Hi, my names Furlan, it’s nice to actually see you conscious for a change." He chuckles, holding his hand out. I take it gingerly. Furlan, I remember the other younger boy mention him when we were running for our lives back at the mall. He gestures behind him. "And that’s Levi." I look over at the other man. Levi. Ravi said that he’s the one to thank for getting me and Eren out of that hellhole.

But then he turns to leave...

"Wait!" Levi stops, looking almost annoyed as he turns around. I’m actually quite surprised by my abruptness myself. "I need to thank you…"

"No, you don’t." He waves his hand dismissively. It was said so matter of fact and his expression didn’t change from that of complete disinterest.

And then he walks away...

"Sorry, he can be a bit…like that." Furlan looks at me, apologising on his friends behalf.

"Yes! Levi can be a bit of a grumpy lump but you don’t need to worry about that. Just focus on settling in and there are lots of other people you’ll get a chance to talk to later on. Kay?" Hange throws her arm around my shoulder, leading me away and towards the tent set up for me and Eren.

Towards our new home...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Already had chapter 2 written so figured, meh, put it up now. let me know what you think so I know whether I should dive into more chapters and commit. <3


	3. Meeting People and Learnin' Things

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Okay so this chapter is more to open up introductions of characters and painting the surroundings a little more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Even though there are a variety of people's POV most will be Mikasa or Levi through out the story unless I feel the situation calls for someone else's perspective or inner monologue.  
> Also I am basing the fic in America, however I am not American (I am British) so if I say something inaccurate or stupid let me know but I'm gonna keep it quite general XD  
> Please let me know what you think <3

(Levi POV)

"You know what I miss most... Poptarts, man I’d kill for a Poptart right now--!"

The kid from the mall won’t leave me alone. I try _really_ hard to ignore him.

But it’s not working...

"--I guess it’s hard to pick one thing, I mean, of course I don’t just miss _Poptarts_. I obviously miss my mum and dad…its’s just...easier to focus on the little things, you know. It’s distracting--" Eren looks down at his shoes.

We’re sat on top of Hanji’s campervan, feet dangling over the edge. Since I barely sleep as it is I don’t bother with a tent, sleeping out here allows me to keep watch and it’s an effective way of staying out of other people’s business.

Well, it _was..._

"--I’m just saying, if I could have any one thing right now to make me feel just some sense of normalcy, I reckon a Poptart could do that--"

Oh my god...

Why are children so annoying?

"--Hey Levi, do you think next time you’re out scouting, you could see if you could find me some Poptarts?" Big green eyes look up at me, making me shuffle uncomfortably.

"If I say yes will you leave me alone?"

He seems to consider this...

"Nah."

I sigh...

"Then find your own fucking Poptarts."

Eren just smiles at me, but then something catches his attention.

"MIKASA!"

I look down to see Eren’s sister approaching reluctantly, lead by one of the other 'more domesticated' campers. Naomi. She’s the one who keeps accusing me of shit I didn’t do. One of the people who looks at me as if I’m gonna steal her purse, kill her and then shoot her dog.

Even back in the day, I would _never_ dream of hurting a dog.

Naomi, however, she’s another story- wrong place- wrong time...

She could have been collateral...

I could have made it look like an accident...

Then I’d keep her dog and we’d live happily together until the end of days...

Which… just so happens to be now a days.

Well, it was nice whilst it lasted...

"Watcha doin?" Eren lowers his voice once the two women are stood just below us, then he leans over the edge precariously and I absentmindedly pull him back again. I lift one of my legs and rest my arm on top, pinching the bridge of my nose. Naomi begins to answer Eren and she’s got that fake smile on her face which tells tales of trim lawns and garden picket fences.

I’ve never had a fucking garden picket fence...

Maybe Levi, that’s why you never smile, maybe that’s all that was missing...

I’ve done it; I’ve cracked the code to happiness-

Garden picket fences.

I realise they’ve been talking and now they’re looking at me. Was I asked a question, could just say no. No is usually the safe option.

I decide to just keep my face blank and say nothing...

"You know it wouldn’t hurt if you tried socialising with the camp a bit more, I’ve spent all morning showing Mikasa around and everyone has already warmed up to her. Unlike you." Naomi stands with her hands on her hips.

I’m being reprimanded by a bloody housewife...

I look over slowly to Eren’s sister, who looks as if she would rather be anywhere else. I haven’t spoken to her properly since we carried her body into camp yesterday and I don’t plan to.

The kid’s already enough...

"Hey! Leave Levi alone, if he doesn’t wanna talk to people, he doesn’t have to talk to people--"

Yes, _preach_ it Eren! Kid’s starting to become useful.

"--besides, he’s got _me_ now!"

Sigh. Damn it.

Naomi seems displeased with Eren’s outburst. Surprise surprise.

"Don’t you think you’d rather get to know the other kids your age a bit better, Krista would love to hang out a bit more. You two could become such good friends…"

"Krista’s nice but she’s kinda shy…"

"Well that’s why it would be nice of you to talk to her more. Besides I don’t think it’s a good idea for you to hang around such…" Naomi’s eyes roll over in my direction. "...unbecoming company."

Unbecoming?

Eh-

I’ve been called worse...

Eren begins to bite back when I decide I’ve had enough of _this_ situation.

"How’s your arm doing?" I look to Eren’s sister again, who seems very rather taken aback when she realises I was talking to her. A look of confusion crosses her face until it sinks in.

"Umm, it’s… a lot better… Thank you, thanks…" She lifts her arm up and down in a weak attempt at confirming her condition. My face stays just as blank but my enquiry made the other two shut up, having it's desired effect. Before anyone can try talking to me again I jump down from the roof of the van and start walking away.

"It’s been lovely as always Naomi…" I turn around and half-heartedly lift my arm in a so long, giving a rather soar smile.

"Wait, where’re you--"

I’ve already got my back to them when Eren tries to interrupt and I just swipe my arm in a dismissal, a 'don’t follow me' -'you’ve had your time' - 'goodbye now'.

I hear Naomi moan about something as I wander off towards the far field, probably something about me being rude, how I can’t be trusted, or some other bullshit...

God, who knew the end of the world could be such a drag.

 

 (Mikasa POV)  


-2 hours before-

My first night in camp was more restful than I expected, but I guess I was just exhausted from the day. Eren slept soundly next to me in our little tent and the world was eerily quiet outside, aside from the occasional person walking past on watch.

Eren ran out of the tent as soon as someone announced there was breakfast to be had and by the time I had made it to the centre of camp where food was being served, he was finished and long gone. I awkwardly sat on my own and ate some rather lumpy looking porridge Hange served me up.

Most people still kept clear of me, seemingly giving me space for now, but I knew I had to start some introductions at some point. I didn’t really recognise anyone sitting around me.

"Hey! You must be Mikasa! My name is Naomi." I was startled when a very loud and abrupt woman sat next to me. "I act like a council head around here and Hange thought it would be nice if I showed you the ropes, walk you around a bit and basically let you know how things work around here."  The woman in front of me doesn’t look like she’s in the middle of an apocalypse, with a tight trimmed blonde bob and a cardigan. No, more like a…middle class store manager...

Yes...

Soccer mum, drives an SUV, drinks too much wine 'cause her husband spends too many nights away with work, crushing bad on the gardener, pristine house, too many inspirational life quotes on the walls -none of which she lives by.

I almost expect her to hand me some handmade cookies...

Made from the freshest doomsday ingredients, apocalypse cookies, 'cause nothing says end of days like chocolate chip.

I realise her hand is extended for me to take whilst my mind was drifting aimlessly-

So I take it.

"Hi, yeah, Mikasa, me… that’s… that’s me." I nod my head slowly, shaking her hand and placing my bowl down.

"Amazing! Well, shall we get started, I thought we’d take a little trek around the camp and I’d introduce you to everyone as we go, yeah?"

I felt the question rhetorical and took it as an instruction. I’m sure this will be fun, lots and lots of fun, whoo people. I’ve never been much of a people person. I stand up and let her begin to lead me down towards the busier part of camp.

 

The introductions take up most of the morning since Naomi seems to feel the need to engage- every- single- person- we see in some mundane conversation, which I have absolutely no interest in. This women functions on her popularity status and I have _so_ had enough. We covered those I had already met, including Erwin, Hange and Ravi. Before we left the medic van I managed to have a conversation with Ravi whilst Naomi was talking someone else’s ear off.

"So, how are the introductions going?" We sit down on one of the medic beds and I put my head in my hands.

"Fine, I guess. Actually you're kind of at the beginning of the tour, so… a lot of people left to go I suppose."

"It’ll be fine, everyone here is really nice and… I know Naomi can be a bit… _Naomi,_ but she means well. She’s actually helped a lot in the camp, making people feel comfortable and stuff."  I just nod.

"Come now! Lots of ground to cover!" Naomi grabs my arm and we begin again, making our way down the camp's 'high street'.  I wave Ravi goodbye...

A silent wave-

A cry for help...

Sigh, dear God rescue me from this nightmare.

Other campers include Jean, who I recognised as the boy who helped me at the mall. With Jean stood Connie, Sasha and Ymir, all of which were there that day. They seem to be about my age, perhaps a bit younger and packing ready for a scouting trip.

"So you all go scouting around the area?" I was curious as to what the different jobs entail since I’ll have to pick something soon.

"Yeah, it’s scary, but it needs to be done you know." The girl, Sasha, smiles at me whilst buckling a knife onto her belt.

"Do you like the idea of scouting; you could come with us some time." Jean asks, clearly picking up on me eyeing their equipment.

"Actually, yeah I’d like that, I was always the one who ran off looking for supplies when it was just me and Eren, since, well...Eren’s only ten and… I wouldn’t trust him outside on his own." I chuckle dryly.

Yeah, Eren would so fall in a ditch or something stupid...

I realise then that I never thanked Jean for the day at the mall, so… I guess now is a good a time as any.

"Thanks, by the way, for helping me." He smiles at me and a blush starts to creep up his neck, making Connie snicker, patting him on the shoulder.

"You’re, erm, you’re welcome, I mean... I was just doing what I was told but, yeah, I’m glad you’re okay anyway, so, yeah…"  The blush fills the rest of Jeans face when he turns around to finish packing his bag and Connie takes back the conversation.

"We’d love to have you come along some time then, Eren claims you’re quite the fighter." Connie is quite a bit shorter than Jean and is rockin’ a military style buzz cut. I just smile at his comment, Eren has a habit of spouting stuff when I’m not around, which tends to make me feel quite uncomfortable.

"We just have to make sure you can hold your own and it would have to be cleared with Furlan, Levi or Mike. They’re the ones who tend to lead the… expeditions, so to speak." Connie continues as he helps Sasha with her equipment.

"Okay, cool, I’ll have to show you some time…" I lift my fists in a mock fighting stance. "…how I can hold my own then." Connie and Sasha smile at me and I decide that these guys are alright. There’s a loud clap behind me and I wince when I hear Naomi announce our departure, onto the next stop of people. I wave goodbye to Jean, Connie and Sasha, reluctantly following again.

"Well, up and onwards, as they say, nearly done, I think you’re going to fit in very well here." She smiles when she looks back at me.  I smile _back_ knowing it doesn’t reach my eyes, but it hasn’t in a long while so…

Walking down the edge of the far end of camp, I try to take in the surrounding area. The field which holds the growing campsite is surrounded by trees, leading to quite thick woods. I know I’ve already seen people head into them, maybe for foraging or hunting. Down the other side of the left row of tents and campervans is a steep hill drop. There’s another field full of wild flowers and down the far left of that is a lake. The lake looks like it goes out quite far and has a small wooden jetty going out into the water. We head down towards the water’s edge where I can see a couple of people who appear to be washing some clothes? It was a woman with short blonde hair and a much older man laughing at something she said.

"Nanaba, Pixis!" Naomi waves for their attention.

The older man, who I assume must be Pixis, turns with a smile, making his moustache turn up at a funny angle.

"Why hello ladies, and what do we owe the pleasure?"

"I was just going around introducing Mikasa to the other campers." She gestures toward me, which invokes an innate awkward wave from myself.

"Ah yes! The fresh meat." He chuckles at this as Nanaba smacks him lightly on the back of the head.

"Stop creeping her out! It’s lovely to meet you Mikasa." She extends her hand for me to shake, which I do.

For the millionth time...

That day – sigh...

"It’s lovely to meet you both as well." I turn to Pixis. "So, are you like the wise old man of the camp, 'cause, they all have one right – so I heard." I’m concerned my humour wouldn’t come across, but Pixis calms my nerves when he wheezes at my remark.

"I suppose you could say that. If you have any pressing concerns, please, seek my wisdom." He laughs at me whilst slowly raising his palms in a mock gesture.

This camp is full of a weird mixture of people...

We move on and head towards the centre of the camp when I hear Eren’s voice in the distance; I look around and spot him on top of the bigger campervan to the left. He’s talking to somebody; at least it’s nice to know he’s making friends. Not that Eren’s ever had a problem with that. I realise that the person he’s talking to is the grumpy guy from the other day, Levi, who didn’t seem to want to talk to _me_.

God I bet Eren’s annoying the hell out of him...

Good-

"Is that your brother?" Naomi sounds cautious which peeks my interest, 'cause it’s an octave off of her usual chipper tone.

"Yeah, why?" I stop when she turns to me.

"It’s just… I wouldn’t feel comfortable in letting my son.. or, or brother, hang around people like Levi. Bad influence and all that." She looks at my face, smiling almost pitifully like I’m some kind of unfit mother.

I feel immediately annoyed, both as a hypothetical mother _and_ on Levi’s behalf. Given, I don’t know the man – not even a little, but he’s the reason I’m not dead and Eren’s still got a family.

"Why do you say that?" I try not to let my annoyance slip through and try for a simple confused expression.

"Well, it’s just, you know I take it as my own responsibility to know about all of the people who come and go from this camp."

That’s not an answer...

"So?" I raise my eyebrows, instructing her to continue. She lowers her voice and leans closer to me.

"Did you know what Erwin did before everything happened?" I shake my head and shrug, I did not. Why _would_ I know that? "Well he was the head guard at a high security prison, largest one in the state." Okay well, good for him, cushy government job. And yeah, I can see that being true, he certainly gives off that authoritative vibe but I didn’t understand what this had to do with Levi. "Well, Erwin was with Hange and Levi from the beginning, I think they all got out together. From my knowledge, Hange was a psychologist at the prison and Levi, well, Levi was an inmate--"

Huh...

"--Word is he was a pretty high profile criminal too, serving _a_ _lot_ of time." She looks at me pointedly. "So yes, I would stay away if I were you, people like him can’t be trusted." She smiles again as if she just finished telling me a recipe for lasagne and didn’t just bare to me another man’s personal business as if we were gossiping over lunch.

"Well, I guess I’ll keep that in mind then." I lean away from her and smile distastefully – which she obviously interprets as a 'thank you for looking out for me Naomi, you’re such a kind and considerate person'.

And so she signals for us to continue...

Honestly, learning this makes some other things I’ve heard today make more sense, like many people’s dislike of Levi in the camp. But as far as I can see, after everything, after what the world has become, one man’s past seems like the least of our problems.

Besides, Eren seems to like him...

And honestly that speaks volumes in my eyes.

"MIKASA!" I look up to see Eren waving at me from his position on top of the campervan, Naomi immediately grabs my arm, leading me closer.

"Come on, lets go see your brother". I get the feeling that’s not why she wants to go over there.

When we’re stood closer I glance up to see Levi, but he’s looking away, deep in thought about something else.

"Watcha doin?" Eren leans over the edge, immediately putting my overprotective sister senses into over-drive, but they’re settled when Levi pulls him back again. My heart rate simmers, silently thanking the silent man.

"I was just showing your sister around camp, getting everyone to meet her. She’s quite popular already." Naomi smiles at Eren, that 'mums know better' smile playing with what she really wants to say.

"Of course she is! My sister _is_ the best after all."

"Well clearly, and what are you doing...?" She turns her head towards Levi. "…Can’t make friends your own age, huh, Levi?" Naomi crops her smile, awaiting a response, but the man clearly wasn’t paying attention. I wonder if he’ll try and bullshit his way out of it, but he just keeps a blank expression and says nothing. This clearly irks Naomi, someone who is so use to having everyone’s undivided attention."You know it wouldn’t hurt if you tried socialising with the camp a bit more, I’ve spent all morning showing Mikasa around and everyone has already warmed up to her. Unlike you."

The number of fucks given on Levi’s face is non-existent...

This makes me smile...a small smile-

Eren begins to defend his new friend as I start to zone out of his and Naomi’s bickering. I find it hard to believe Levi could really be as bad as Naomi claims when Eren has taken so fondly to him.

"How’s your arm doing?" It takes me a minute to realise he’s asked me a question, completely disregarding the other two. My mind goes momentarily blank.

Arm?

What is he talking about?

Oh yeah!

"Umm, it’s… a lot better… Thank you, thanks…" Wow, way to go Mikasa, I swear I used to be so much more articulate _before_ the end of the world. I lamely flop my arm around to show him. Before I can begin to feel more stupid, Levi jumps off of the roof with the agility of a cat and starts walking off, giving half-hearted goodbyes.

"Well, ever the gentleman is Levi."  Naomi turns back to me. "Shall we continue?"

I watch Levi walk away and debate for a second to go after him and force him to accept my thanks and have a god damn conversation with me...

Not that it bothers me that he won’t talk to me.

'Cause it doesn’t...

That would be stupid.

I hardly even know the guy.

I watch Eren climb down from the campervan and I decide I just want to head back to the tent. But Naomi’s having _none_ of it.

"Hey, where are you going, we haven’t finished! We still have at least ten more stops and I thought--"

"You know Naomi..." She stops abruptly at my tone and I sigh. "Has anyone ever told you that you’re just _too_ \- _fucking_ \- _much?"_ I don’t wait for a reply, walking away, hearing Eren’s laughter behind me.

The porridge isn’t sitting well in my stomach anymore and I just want to crawl under a large pile of leaves and disappear.


	4. No Time For Haters

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mikasa is done with Naomi's shit and Furlan reminisces over the days of cereal.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This fic has become a wonderful distraction from my real life responsibilities so thank you everyone for reading! It's quite a short chapter but I wanted to get something up today cause I have a deadline on monday and might not be able to write for a few days.  
> Please comment and let me know what you think <333

(Mikasa POV)

It’s been a week now since me and Eren were brought to the camp and nothing out of the ordinary has happened. People sleep whilst others take watch, people eat, people scout, people eat again and then some people have a little freak out before we all go to sleep… again.

I never thought I’d miss the stress of trying to survive...

Apart from Ravi, I haven’t really gotten to know anyone else beyond the original introductions. Jean, Sasha and Connie chat with me whenever we pass by and Pixis is always up for telling stories, but…

No one here still really knows me...

Eren runs off to do whatever Eren does. He’s made friends with one of the other kids in camp, Krista I think, a quiet girl who seems to still have both her parents. I know he hangs around and bugs Levi a lot when he’s in camp, which I’m sure is driving the man crazy – not that he’s spoken to _me_ since that day with Naomi.

Oh yeah and Naomi hasn’t spoken to me since I snapped at her, not that I’m particularly surprised, one step out of line and you’re in the bad books forever with a woman like that. I see her glance at me in disgust and whisper to others when she doesn’t think I’m looking, like we’re, what, fucking fifteen?

Sigh...

Ravi told me he overheard her talking to Erwin, telling him she thinks I’m going to be a 'problem'. What the hell does that even mean?! I’ve hardly even made a noise since I got to this stupid place. Now people look at me like I’m, well, a 'problem'. People are saying I’m the reason they lost a good few weeks of supplies and that I put all of their scouting team in danger because I wanted to _steal_ their shit.

Which… technically is kinda true...

But when you put it like that I sound like a total asshole-

All in all, life’s pretty lonely in camp.

I’m sat on my own around the main fire pit eating breakfast when I hear someone sit down beside me. Furlan? I remember meeting him when I first got here, but I’m kinda surprised to see him now.

"You know..." He starts talking like we were great friends. "...someone found a whole crate of cheerios which they brought back with them after a scouting trip within the first couple weeks. We used them to finish _all_ the good milk we could find. It was a good time. Now all we’ve got is this 'porridge' Hange claims will 'keep ya fightin’ alllll day long!' – But man I’m always hungry again by ten... Plus I miss milk. Back in my home town, before everything happened, we had this milkman, his name was Arnold, old dude with just _the best_ sense of humour. Also, he looked like that short guy from Trainspotting which always made me laugh."

I look up to see Furlan peering down at his disappointing breakfast with a smile on his face. I really don’t know how to reply to his cereal story, so I just say nothing and raise an eyebrow.  He looks at me then and smiles, something else knowing in his expression. We haven’t particularly spoken since that first day, but I remember he was very friendly when we did – unlike his grumpy counter partner. 

I decide to break the silence out of courtesy...

"Huh..." That’s it, that’s genuinely all I have in me. "Can I... help you?" I hate to sound unwelcoming towards one of the only campers whose actually being nice to me, but I’m suspicious of his company. Furlan seems to pick up on this and smiles again.

"You know you _do_ remind me of him a bit." His expression turns thoughtful.

I’m just confused...

"I don’t understand, I… remind you of your _milkman…?"_ I know I have a weird look on my face but I wasn’t sure how to feel about that. Furlan thought it was _very_ funny, letting out an amused wheeze.

"No, nonono, that’s not what I meant..." He takes a moment to compose himself. " _Levi,_ you… you remind me of Levi sometimes..."Okay, now I’m even more confused, so I say nothing. "You both have this weird vibe about you which says to automatically back off, and you also have that dark expression on your face that makes it really hard to know what you’re thinking…" His face lights up as he points at me. "Yeah, that one!"

He’s still laughing when another body stands in front of us, blocking the sun.

"Well, you _do_ have a habit of hanging out with the bad eggs, don’t you Furlan?" Naomi’s stood there with her hands on her hips and a smug look on her face.

"The bad eggs are always the most interesting Naomi; maybe you’d learn that if you strayed further than your little cardigan circle." Furlan’s still smiling when he says this, a charming smile at that. I assumed the cardigan circle he was referring to was the small group of women she seems to hang around with who never leave the camp. They spend their time just cleaning and looking after everyone else’s kids.

Which, I guess, someone’s gotta do...

"No thank you!" She turns to me, a smile on her lips. "I was talking to Erwin earlier and I think it’s clear that the camp is getting too crowded. Might be time to clear it out a bit, Eren can stay of course, he’s only little, but I’m getting worried that your big head isn’t gonna fit in any of our tents." She makes a mocking pouty face and then saunters off to sit with her family.

Ugh, who even has a family anymore, that is so two months ago...

I knew she was only saying it to get a rise out of me but my stomach drops at even the slimmest chance of being kicked out and split up from Eren. Not that Eren would let me go anywhere without him, but, it’s becoming harder and harder to hang onto _anyone_ right now.  

I look down at my feet and focus on keeping my expression blank...

"Don’t listen to her, she’s full of shit. Erwin would never kick anyone out, at least, you know...without a good reason." Furlan looks at me with a serious expression on his face. "She has a habit of spouting that kind of stuff around, and besides, she’s never managed to get Levi out and I get the feeling you’re going to be just as stubborn." He tries to lighten the mood, chuckling once again.

I ignore the second round of comparison and try to forget about Naomi. I’m not hungry anymore and the sinking feeling in my stomach has turned to a nauseous whirlwind. I place my bowl to the side; standing up to leave, but Furlan quickly grabs my hand before I have the chance to escape this whole situation.

I just want to be alone...

I try to give him a small smile, but I know it was a half-assed attempt, I pull my hand out from his grasp and walk back to my tent.

 

(Furlan POV)

"Levi! She’s gone _too_ far now! I can’t believe with the world gone to shit, and EVERYTHING, people still have to be such _assholes_ to other people!! Like... what the hell is wrong with her, we should stick together now but, noooooo, she has to go all parent council meeting on our asses. You need to _do_ something!!"

Levi stops loading the truck and turns to me, face blank as always.

"Okay..." He throws the flash light he was carrying in the back of the truck and crosses his arms. "Whose parents do I need to call this time?" I look at him exasperated; annoyed he’s not taking me seriously.

"I’m serious Levi, I’m worried about Mikasa, Naomi’s set her eyes on her and you know what she can be like." I cross my arms, mirroring his stance. He lets his own arms fall to the side and picks the torch back up so he can carry on with loading the truck.

"Why exactly have you brought this forth as _my_ problem, I’ve hardly spoken to the girl and you know Naomi can’t do shit. She’s all talk and no--"

"That’s not the point Levi! The feeling of isolation and people ganging up on you, especially in this gone to shit world, I thought you would understand that better than anybody."

Levi stops then and sighs...

"I don’t understand what you want me to do Furlan, confront Naomi? She’ll just paint me as aggressive and a threat to everyone else and it’ll blow up in both our faces!"

"Not necessarily, or you could just--" Levi starts to look annoyed.

"What? Make nice with Mikasa, we become great friends, braid each other’s hair and the world will magically become this wonderful place where people aren’t assholes. She’ll be _fine_ Furlan; she’s a big girl, I’m sure."

He turns back to the truck, indicating the end of the conversation, but I try one last time.

"Maybe you could ask her to go scouting with you, give her something to do, something she can contribute to. She...kinda reminds me of you in a lot of ways, she just needs to find somewhere she _fits in_. Plus Connie says she’d be a good addition? ...At least... think about it, okay?"

 

(Mikasa POV)

I’m sat inside the tent, sorting out the clothes I’ll need to wash for Eren tomorrow and I hear someone clear their throat obnoxiously outside. I walk out and see Naomi standing there with four other women.

"Can I help you ladies?" I leave my face blank...

I really don’t want to do this right now.

"We think it would be a good idea if we had a chat, you know, woman to woman. Concerned mother to…well, sister I suppose. I think it’s clear that all we want is to have our children in the safest environment we can make and its becoming increasingly harder to create that kind of atmosphere with you putting people on edge."

What the hell!?

"What exactly have I _done_ to make people feel so 'on edge'?" I drop the bored composure and step up in Naomi’s face...

Because I am _so_ done with this shit...

"I have done NOTHING since I got here to make you act like such a _bitch_ , yeah, okay, I called you out on your exhausting personality _once,_ you hang tiny shit like that over everyone’s heads? I have survived WAY too much to deal with your petty, first-world-problem, the-world-revolves-around-me, BULLSHIT!!!" I’ve gotten up pretty close to her when one of the women surrounding us steps forward, putting space between us.

"I think maybe you need to calm down because you're making a scene." She places a hand in front of me and turns to comfort Naomi, who's turned a bright red. I look around and realise we have drawn a bit of attention to ourselves.

I hate it...

I want them to go and I just want to run off into the woods until people forget I was even here.

Another one of Naomi’s minions steps into my face...

"You know, life has become hard enough without having to deal with bitter people like you. Naomi tries so hard to keep up morale and you just sit around moping, you’re just bringing everyone down." Naomi’s smug smile is back on her face, watching as her girlfriends gang up on me.

I can feel that tightening feeling in my stomach, that feeling of being trapped and alone. I want someone to stop it; I want them to just leave me alone _..._

I wish Eren was here-

"Is there a problem here ladies, ‘cause I’m pretty sure you’ve all got shit to be doing?"

All of the women jump back from me when they hear Levi’s voice rise out of nowhere. All of them look down at their feet, except Naomi, who looks over to the man, now stood with his arms crossed and a bored expression on his face.  

"No problem here, we’re just... figuring a few things out amongst ourselves, right Mikasa?" Naomi places her arm around my shoulders. "It really doesn’t concern you Levi so you should probably go." The other women step further away when Levi steps closer.

I keep my face down.

I so badly want to shrug Naomi’s arm off my body and I try not to focus on the tears building up behind my eyelids. I start to wonder, if I shut them hard enough, will all of this just go away? I can feel Naomi’s body stiffen next to me when Levi’s voice comes out quieter, an edge to it that makes my own skin prickle.

"I’m getting really sick of this _shit_ Naomi, and its really got to stop..." Levi tilts his head and raises his eyebrows in a short, condescending motion.

I feel the weight on my shoulders disappear almost immediately.

"Are…are you trying to threaten me because you know…"

"What? Threaten you? Jesus..." Levi whispers it under his breath. "What are you going to do Naomi, be a fucking nark, run off to Erwin and tell on me? How about _you_ focus on your _own_ god-damn-business, ‘cause there’s more important shit for us to worry about than you having your _fucking_ feelings hurt by the new girl--"

I look up at Naomi’s pale face as she lifts her chin and storms away. I realise then that the last time I saw them interact, Naomi was probably all talk because Levi was ten foot away on top of a roof. He turns to the rest of the women and smiles a dismissive smile...

"--You can go now ladies; your queen has been excused." The women blush and mutter some apologies; one even stops long enough to smile back at Levi, which I find weird considering the circumstances. _They_ seem to respect the man to some extent, whether this is out of fear or something else, I don’t know.

I look over to Levi as he’s still focused on the direction the women left in. After seeing him confront Naomi like she was some out-welcomed pawn, I begin to see how he could have been someone powerful in the world before.

It’s the first time I’ve seen the man up close without being semi-unconscious or having him walk away. He’s shorter than I expected, but makes up for it with a pretty intimidating presence. His hair is cut into a dark undercut with the front left longer to hang in his face, his face being all angles from this perspective, making his features extremely striking. Looking down I see tattoos lining up both arms, and when I peer back up to his face, I spot another on the side of his neck, it looks like a spider of some sort; but I can’t really make it out.

Maybe it’s like a gang thing...?

He was in prison, it would make sense I guess...

I notice then that he’s staring back at me with a raised eyebrow...

I can feel my face getting red – which is very unlike me- so I keep my mouth shut before I say something stupid-

"Go get some shit together, you're coming scouting with us today. We meet in the front east exit of the camp in half an hour." Then he just starts walking away, _again,_ not leaving me anytime for follow up questions.

I’m momentarily stunned and not sure what just happened.

Scouting?

Now?

"Okay?" I say to the empty air around me. I guess I need to go find Eren and let him know.

 

(Levi POV)

"Woooh, hewwwwww!!!  Finally a supply run with some pizazz!!!" I immediately regret asking Hange for help in writing the supplies list.

"What?" My head is resting on the side of the truck whilst Hange is leaning on the bonnet.

"Well it’s just most runs so far have been stores, food, blah blah blah, but a _hospital,_ now that’s raising the stakes don’t you think?" She wiggles her eyebrows before going back to writing down the medicines her and Ravi discussed earlier in the day.

"I don’t understand how you were allowed to be a psychiatrist; it’s like the blind leading the _fucking_ blind."

"Well, Levi, interestingly, most psychologists, or psychiatrists tend to be the most fucked up of all. Hmm, yes! How are you supposed to understand what your clients are feeling if you’ve never felt anything yourself?!"

"You worked in a high security prison, your clients murdered and chopped people up into little pieces, it’s a little beyond, 'my father wasn’t really around and mummy brought strange men home.' I’m kinda hoping you _haven’t_ felt what your clients were feeling."

"Hmmmm, interesting choice of examples Levi, tell me, was your father overly absent and did you have a particularly promiscuous mother?" Hange quickly turns the list over, posed, ready to scribble notes on the back.

"Fuck Hange, it was just… forget it, I’m not getting into this shit with you again..."

"Oh come on Levi, you never spoke about your parents when I saw you back at the prison, it might help you to open up to this new strange world."

"Just finish the fucking list Hange, before I take that pencil, and open _you_ up to this new strange world." Hange promptly gets back to it when she sees the look on my face.

"Almost ready?" I turn to see Mike approaching with Connie and Jean in tow.

"Five more minutes -just have to wait for Hange to finish the list." I stand up straight and head round the back of the truck.

"Oh hey, what are you doing here?" I hear Jean turn around and address the last addition to our scouting team for today.

"Mikasa’s joining us for this run." I walk over and take the days provisions from Mike and put them in the back.

"Oh cool, it’ll be really awesome to have you on the team I’m sure!" 

"Thanks..." Mikasa doesn’t really give Jean much to work with in terms of conversation, and then I feel her eyes on me so I look up, catching her staring.

I raise my eyebrows in question...

"Where exactly are we going?" Her tone is bored and her expression gives nothing away; I can’t tell whether she’s nervous or just curious.

"A hospital about twenty-five miles down south-west, we’re short on practically all medic supplies so…" I shrug. "It’s a bit more of a risk than we usually do but we’ve been putting it off for too long, and we’re really starting to need them. When we brought you in a week ago it pretty much used up the last of our pain meds." Mikasa looks down at that; I didn’t say it to make her feel bad, just to make a point. I step closer to her and she peers up at me.

"Think of this as your way of paying me back for risking my ass for you in that mall." I lift the corner of my mouth. "And maybe if you’re not totally useless, you can come on more." I turn back around then and head to the front of the truck to grab the list from Hange.

"All done! Now, don’t worry if you can’t find everything, but try get as much as you can!" She hands me the list and I take in her scratchy handwriting.

"Jesus Christ Hange, maybe you really are a real doctor after all." I scrunch the list up and shove it in my back pocket.

"Hahaa, well! Stay safe, don’t talk to strangers and look both ways when you cross the street!" She winks at me before she waves everyone else a good bye and heads back to camp.

"Alright, everyone in the truck I guess, and let’s get this shit over with."


	5. I Hate Hospitals

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mikasa and the others arrive at the hospital and things don't go as smoothly as planned, surprise surprise.  
> Small panic attack in this chapter in case anybody doesn't like that but it doesn't last long.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoo! Chapter fiiiiiiive!  
> I didn't do any Levi POV in this chapter which is weird cause he's my favourite POV to write in, but longer chapter this time so that's alright.  
> Hope you enjoy and please comment to let me know what you think so far <333

(Furlan POV)

I’m sat chatting with Hange whilst we eat our lunch, since it’s our turn to forage today, Nanaba and Linda gave us our food earlier than everyone else. Foraging can be a long and laborious job, but, if it means I get to skip the food queue, then dude…

I’m game.

"Do you think…if I managed to capture one of the walkers, I could tie it down and just keep it for a while…to see if I can talk to it. Maybe if I try long enough one of them might start to become accustomed to my voice and … and…. and _attack_ on demand or something." Hange looks at me with a twinkle in her eye, talking around a mouthful of food.

"You… want to train one like a weapon f-for what, why?" I raise my eyebrows, slightly concerned.

"SCIENCE! Just imagine if we could get one of them to respond to us in some way. It would be a step forward in understanding how dead they really are."

"There is no ' _how_ dead', it’s just _dead,_ there isn’t a spectrum, just… just dead Hange."

"But what if you’re wrong…!"

"I’m not." I deadpanned. I needed to derail this train of thought of hers before it escalated. Levi would usually be the one to smack some sense into her, but he’s not here, so it’s my responsibility.

Furlan is on Hange watch-I try to change the subject.

"So, this rabbit huh?"

"Don’t change the subject!"

Damn it...

"Hey, watcha eatin?" Eren walks over, chewing on something square and colourful.

"The stew Nanaba and Linda made for lunch today, Hange and I are foraging this afternoon so we… wait, what are _you_ eating?" Eren swallows what’s in his mouth and smiles.

"Poptart! Levi found some for me the other day when he went scouting!" He held the sugary bread product out to me before swiftly taking another bite.

Hange shoves herself forward at this to peer at Eren next to me.

"Wait! What? Levi never brings _me_ anything exciting back!" She sits back in a huff, crossing her arms.

Eh oh...

"I’m starting to think you probably should have kept the fact of that rare display of kindness to yourself Eren." I laugh at the worried look on the kid's face but it doesn’t last long, he just shrugs his shoulders, sits next to me and continues eating.

"Do you know what time they’ll be back?" Eren looks up at me, his eyebrows pinched inwards.

"Hard to say really." I shrug my own shoulders. "Levi will probably try make sure they leave the hospital before dark but… depends how well the supply run goes. And also assuming they don’t run into any problems..." Eren’s face turns downward with a concerned expression – maybe I shouldn’t have brought the possibility up. "But I wouldn’t worry about that Eren, your sister is with some very capable people and she’s already proven she’s strong. You said so yourself didn’t you?." He nods his head slowly, still looking down at his now forgotten Poptart.

"I know she’ll be okay, especially since Levi’s there. I’m just worried, you know, she hasn’t been out there in a while."

"I’d give your sister more credit Eren, and if Levi thinks she’s alright to go, then she must be!" Hange jumps in with some support. "And besides if something _does_ go wrong, there’s nothing _we_ can do, sitting here eatin’ rabbit... so what’s the use worrying?" She shrugs. Yep, some grade A support _right_ there.

"Weren’t you supposed to be like a psychiatrist or something?" Eren scowls and crosses his arms.

"Yeah Hange, aren’t you supposed to be _good_ at reassuring people?" I turn my body now to face her, both me and Eren frowning.

"Not necessarily! You know the kind of people I had to work with, you go around murdering twenty-five women, you think there’s a cure for that!? No! I can’t just sit there and be like 'Oh, I’m sure it was just a phase, now let’s get you back on track to that normal life you’re never gonna have' I’m tellin’ ya, there’s no cure for that kind of crazy."

"That’s unfortunate." I hear Eren whisper it as he rolls his eyes. I think the kid might be spending a bit too much time around Levi.

"So how exactly did you help the inmates, what was your purpose?"

"Furlan, dear, does anyone _really_ know what their purpose truly is...? But really, my job was mainly to study, to find out if there was some kind of link or something within some criminal backgrounds or personalities that could lead to them conducting said criminal behaviour..." She turns her hand around in an exasperated motion. "I met some very interesting people in that job though!" Hange raises her eyebrows, pointing a finger at me sternly.

"What did you learn about Levi?"  Eren leans forward, intrigued.

"Uggghh! Levi was a _hard-_ nut- to- _crack!"_

"He never told you shit did he?"

"Mmmmm, nope, nahah, nothing.  Five months I spent, trying to get him to open up to me, but, to no avail. He will forever be wrapped in that ever enticing proverbial shawl of mystery." She has a weird distant look in her eyes now.

I turn to Eren.

"I think we’ve lost her..." Nope...

"BUT, the end of days is still young and I _will_ get Levi to open up to me if it is the last- thing- I- do!"

"Well, good luck with that…"

"AND WHAT THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSE TO DO WITH THIS!?" We hear a loud commotion from across camp, putting an abrupt stop to our conversation. Looking up we can see Linda’s husband leering over some of the other men, throwing around what appears to be a broken fishing rod.

"What’s going on over there?" Eren’s gone back to eating his Poptart, but his shoulders have bunched up as if he’s warry of the situation. There’s a look on his face as if he’s seeing something else, reliving a memory almost...

"It’s Richard; he has a bit of a …bad temper. He became quite violent, especially towards his wife earlier in the month but Levi got him to calm down. He hasn’t really lashed out in a while, although…"

"I think it’s a dominance thing." Hange pushes her glasses up her nose and turns to me and Eren. "He’s a burly chap, probably use to bossing people about in his previous life, feeling powerful and all that. Before Levi knocked him to the ground a few weeks ago, he was trying to assert himself, find a high position in camp...turns out the guy was pretty useless when it came to a lot of things, just a big mouth."

"Why did Levi step in, doesn’t seem like he's the type to get involved?"

"Usually you’d be right there Eren, Levi hates mixing in with other people’s problems, it was something I always found quite interesting, you’d expect a man of such a high profile to want to get his hands dirty, grab some more spotlight. Levi was always very much adamant on staying in the shadows, didn’t draw a lot of attention to himself individually during his criminal days. I always theorized it down to perhaps a lonely and independent childhoo…"

"Hange! Focus..." I try to get her back on track.

"Right, yes… but Richard was becoming very violent, he has a six year old daughter you know. Linda appeared one morning with a black eye, Alice running from the tent in tears. It wasn’t nice. With everything going on you need to be able to look out for the people around you, but it was just getting too out of hand."

"Do you think because a bit of time has passed, he’s testing the waters again?" I ask Hange since she’s actually making sense at the moment.

"Possibly, we should probably keep an eye on him." We watch the commotion in front of us disperse once again and we sit in silence. "...SO, Eren, wanna come look for questionable berries and mushrooms with me and Furlan in the woods!?"

I’m always amazed at how she can switch from crazy Hange to professional psychiatrist, and back to crazy so quick.

"Hell yeah!"

We put our empty bowls in the campervan and head towards the far woods, picking up our weapons and foraging equipment as we go.

"Hey Furlan, what do you think my sister and the others are doing right now?"  Eren runs to catch up with me.

"Dunno, I guess.." I look down at my watch, scrunching my eyebrows. "…they should have probably made it to the hospital by now..."

 

(Mikasa POV)

"Wow, what- a- shithole." Connie puts his hands on his hips as he inspects the back entrance of the hospital.

"Yeah, the apocalypse will do that to a place." Jean goes to stand next to him, both of them nodding their heads in unison as if we’ve asked them to come over to give us a quote on refurbishment.

Mike appears next to me, silently passing me a backpack. The guy didn’t really say anything much during the journey, apart from when Levi asked him about directions... come to think of it, I’ve never really heard him say much of anything really.

I guess, he's just a man of few words...

The drive on the way here was pretty uneventful, few cars lined the back roads we took and any wanderers we came across didn’t pay our car much mind at the speed we were going.

"Alright, we don’t know what we’re walking into so everyone be on their guard, Connie you’ll pair up with Mike, Jean, you’ll be with Mikasa. Nobody walk off on your own! That’s how you _die."_

Levi picks up his back pack and we head through the back door, clearing the debris as we go, everyone particularly quiet since we don’t know what we’ll find inside. Jean stops walking so I can catch up to him and we walk side by side.

"You alright?" I turn my head briefly to catch him looking at me.

"Yeah..." I take in the blood smeared walls and discarded charts, there’s a faint groaning in the distance but it doesn’t sound like there’s anything in the immediate area. I can smell the strong odour of antiseptic in the air, filling my mind with memories, and not pleasant ones at that.

We walk out into an open reception area, chairs and various hospital supplies stray across the floor. The walls are all a pale grey colour with the occasional brush of redy brown blood drying to the surface. The afternoon is still quite young so the sun shines through the large open plan windows. Looking down some of the corridors however, it’s clear to see that light will be a problem in some areas. Levi walks over to the waiting room area and plonks his bag into the nearest chair, shoving his hand into his back pocket, he takes out the list I saw Hange give him before we left. He holds it up in front of him then passes it to Mike, motioning for everyone to take a look.

"Hange and Ravi have prepared a list so we would know the most pressing supplies to look out for. We are not restricted to the list but they take priority over any other supplies. Take the list and look at it, memorise as many names as you can, give the list to the next person, then go find the shit. Okay?"

"Yes Sir!" Connie smiles whilst taking the list from Mike, who looked confident in his memorisation skills. Levi rolls his eyes at Connie’s reply.

"We’re only sticking to the left wing of the hospital for now so don’t stray too far, activity seems quiet at the moment but still be aware of your surroundings. As well as the list of medicines, make sure you pick up any general medic supplies, gauze, bandages, whatever – use your common sense." Levi peers at Jean and Connie then, both frowning to take in the drug label names. Jean passes the list to me and I hastily begin taking in as many as I can.

_'Acetaminophen', 'Dihydrocodeine'…_

Jesus, you’d have a field day in scrabble with these...

My mind is struggling to take in anything right now, let alone frickin’ dictionary vomit.

"Mikasa, you ready?" Jean’s standing in front of me now and I notice Connie and Mike have already left. The knot in my stomach is back and I realise how much I was trying to ignore my nerves, my heart is beating a mile a minute and I’m struggling to get any words out. It’s the first time I’ve been out in over a week, I figured it’d be like riding a bike, just jump back on, pedal, and start killing the dead like you never stopped.

But it turns out it’s not quite that simple...

My vision becomes blurry and my skin takes on a cold sweat. I can hear Jean talking to me but it’s just a bassy noise travelling through one ear and out the other. I fold the paper up and use it to keep my hands busy whilst I work on my breathing, it helps for a bit and the world starts to focus a bit more.

"Um…I…"

"Jean, go find Mike and Connie, Mikasa and I’ll catch up." Levi picks up his bag and motions his head in the direction the others took, voice never losing its flat, authoritative tone.  

"O-okay..." Jean takes another look at me, concerned and a little disappointed. "We’ll see you in a bit." He smiles a small smile at me and squeezes my shoulder; he quickly looks up towards Levi, frowning before turning down the corridor.

"Sorry." I look up and pass the list back to Levi, but he ignores it.

"You hold onto it, I sat for fifteen minutes listening to Hange talk about each individual item on that list like it was the most interesting thing in the world. I can remember it like fucking poetry." I quickly put the list in the pocket of my jeans to hide my shaky hands.

This is so _stupid_ ; I’ve never been one to freak out when it really matters. I spent so long running and being relied on by Eren -I never faltered in what I had to do. But I was running on adrenaline then, I was running on adrenaline for _so_ _long_. Now that my mind and body have rested, I have time to overthink everything. Before, if I had to do something, I just did it, but now...

I’m not nearly as strong as Eren thinks I am...

I can feel myself begin to psych myself out again when a hand takes my arm and leads me to a chair. Gently; it encourages my body to sit down. I’m working pretty much on auto-pilot now, my breaths coming out in short puffs. A bottle of water is held out in front of me, I take it, the cold bringing a few of my senses back into focus. I realise Levi’s knelt down in front of me, his dark grey eyes searching my face for any indication of me calming down.

And I’m pretty sure if the blood hadn’t drained completely from my head, I’d be blushing because of it.

Stupid Mikasa...

I squeeze my eyes closed and focus on my breathing again, it didn’t help that I was in a hospital of all places. I place a hand over my face and try to see if I can use words again.

"S-sorry, you prob…probably wish you… hadn’t told me to come now." I try for a laugh but it just comes out as a light wheeze. Levi takes a swig of the water I give back to him. Sitting back, still on the floor in front of me, he shrugs at my remark.

"You’re still better company than Jean and Connie." He’s trying to make light of the situation, which I appreciate more than I could even begin to express.

"I really h-hate hospitals." I say it because it’s just something to say, plus it’s true.

"Yeah… me too." Levi looks off with a blank expression on his face, as per customary. "That smell brings back a lot of shit." I find what he says weird for some reason, like he shouldn’t be bothered by… well, anything.

"What do you mean?" The question comes out before I can even register it. His shoulders tense up for a second before releasing again, so fast most people probably wouldn’t have noticed.

I start to think he’s not gonna answer, and why should he; it’s none of my business...

"My mum was really sick when I was a kid." He shrugs again. "I spent a lot of time in hospitals just… waiting. My dad was an asshole so I had to keep her company most of the time, hospitals became like a second home to me for a long time." He looks up at me then, sitting up straighter and he hands me the bottle of water. "She died shortly after I turned fifteen and I swore I’d never step into a hospital ever again." I take the bottle.

"And how’d that work out?" I lift my eyebrows.

"Some dickhead sliced my abdomen open with a switch blade about three months later, had to be rushed to the hospital to have twenty-eight stitches and a… _very_ long winded lecture from some nurses."

"Jesus Christ, what did you do to deserve that!"

"What makes you think it was _my_ fault. I just…"

"Started mixing with the wrong people?" I nod my head and I raise an eyebrow -my expression one I use frequently to tell Eren he’s done something stupid.

"Like _any_ typical fifteen year old boy." Levi meets my expression with a boyish smile, something I never thought I’d see on his face. It makes the knot in my stomach burst into a swarm of butterflies."Besides, I had to make a living somehow, asshole dad remember."

"Making a living with some shady ass people like _any_ _typical_ fifteen year old boy?" I have no control over my scepticism and a small smile plays on my lips.

"Well yeah..." Levi sits up straighter, making a dismissive gesture with his hand. "Go to school, do paper round, meet up with illegal drug smuggling money launderers -sell some shit – buy comic on the way home. Typical teenager stuff." I can’t hold back my laugh at this and I cover my face with my hand, shaking my head.

"You’re crazy..."

He smiles again and I take a mental capture of it - I had a sinking feeling this was a rare gift I was being given. He starts to stand up, offering a hand to help me get up from my own position.

"You think you’re ready to go hunt for some non-prescription drugs?" His stoic expression was back in place and I take his hand, letting him pull me up with ease. He picks up his bag, not taking his eyes off me to determine my reaction. I realise what he'd done, I felt fine now, with my breathing completely evened out and my heartrate back to normal. He had shared a piece of himself, just to help distract me from myself and calm me down.

"Yeah." I pick up my own bag and swing it over my shoulder. "Thanks."  Levi just motions for me to follow him down the corridor so we can meet up with the others, my little episode completely forgotten.

 

(Jean POV)

"I don’t KNOW _Jean_ , they all look the bloody same!!"

"Then just pick up all of them or at least one of each!! Just hurry! You're fucking heavy for such a little guy, you know that _Connie_!!"

Connie’s currently kneeling on top of my shoulders in order to reach the top shelf in the nurses department. The chairs were all battered to high heaven so we figured this would be the safest option.

I regret...everything...

"Okay just… give me a minute, I need to shove them in my backpa…whoa, watch it!"

"Sorry! You need to stop _moving_ so much!"

"Well how am I supposed to bag up all these drugs if I can’t move?!"

Uuuggh!

It’s been nearly twenty minutes since I left Mikasa with Levi and there’s still no sign of them catching up. It’s not that I didn’t _trust_ Levi -I was honestly just looking forward to pairing up with Mikasa myself. Having said that, if he so much as _touches_ her…

"Jesus Christ Jean, focus! It would be really shitty if I survived this long just to be killed off by your incompetence! If anyone’s incompetence is gonna kill me, it’s gonna be my _own_ , got it?!"

"Sorry..." I even myself out again and try to focus on the task at hand. It would have made more sense for Connie to get on Mike’s shoulder but he’s scouting out the other end of the hallway. Everyone knew that Levi’s 'no walking off alone' rule didn’t apply to Mike.

He was quite capable on his own...

"Okay I’m nearly done; I just have to gra--" I hear voices coming from around the corner, turning to see who it is; I lose my balance, seeing Mikasa’s face come into view.

And then I lose my footing...

I completely lose my balance, Connie falling backwards as I veer left, nose diving to the floor. I hear Connie land with a thump when a strong arm catches me before I lose all my teeth. I look up to see Levi with a very unimpressed look on his face. I quickly compose myself, standing up straight. I have too much pride to thank the man verbally but I nod at him lightly – not that the man gives a shit about my gratitude. I turn around and see Mikasa knelt down by Connie’s side; it looks like his head might be bleeding so she begins to bandage it up with the supplies conveniently spilling out of his backpack.

"Uuuuuhh, what the fuck Jean?" Connie rubs his head slowly and takes the bottle of water Mikasa hands to him.

"Sorry, I think I lost my balance."

"Yeah, you _think?!"_ Connie pushes himself up with the nurses desk and looks at me pointedly. I just shrug.

What are you gonna do?

"What exactly were you morons _doing_?" Connie and I stand straight and begin to explain our plan of reaching the top shelf to Levi.

He looks at us for a moment, making my skin begin to prickle on the back of my neck. He suddenly angles his leg away behind the counter and hooks his boot around something, scraping it along the floor in one smooth motion – all whilst never losing eye contact with us. And then a step ladder stands in the centre of the room, looking sturdier and more supportive than anybody’s shoulders.

"Well…" Connie laughs anxiously. "Would you look at that Jean?" I feel like an idiot and decide to internally blame it on Connie. I look over to see Mikasa trying to suppress a smile behind her hand and Levi says nothing else before leaving the room to find Mike, allowing Connie and I to relax our shoulders.

I decide not to acknowledge what just happened out loud and turn to Mikasa...

"You feeling alright now? I felt bad for just up and leaving you alone with Levi; can’t imagine he’s the most comforting person in the world." I take a step towards her whilst Connie starts picking up the drug containers that fell when we did.

"No it was fine, he…helped a lot actually, but I’m fine now... really." She smiles at me and it looks more genuine than the others she gave me earlier in the day.

"Cool…cool, I guess we should get back to looking for more supplies then. Mike went down the hallway towards the C block centre so Levi’s probably gone to look for him there." I turn around to gesture to Connie.

"Come on, let’s go."

"Yeah, yeah, I’m coming, just picking up all the shit _you_ made me drop." Once the three of us leave and reach the other end of the corridor, it sounds like the walker activity has risen two fold.

But I don’t see any around us...

We see Levi and Mike whispering about something right outside a pair of double doors with thick chains running across it. Mike trails his finger across a large piece of paper he’s holding, something he didn’t have earlier.

"What’s going on?"

They both look up at us when Connie asks, Levi’s jaw clenched tighter than usual.

"There are a large number of walkers on the other side of this door, but in order to get through to the next block – where most of the supplies we need will be stored- we have to get through it." Mike hands Levi the piece of paper he was holding. "Mike found a general blueprint layout of this wing of the hospital outside the fire escape stairway." He holds up the blueprints and I can see a large circle in black pen where Mike has circled our location.

"So… what are we gonna do?" Levi and Mike share a look between them.

"Mike proposes we send someone, or a couple of people, through the air duct which connects the nurse’s office and the next block over." That must be what they needed the blueprint layouts for, to know where the air ducts travel.  Levi looks up at Mike, gesturing for him to take over.

"Looking at the schematics of the wing, I think the chances of there being as many walkers in the next block are quite slim. It looks as if they have been lead and trapped in this area…" Mike gestures to the doors behind them. "… specifically, so...in theory, if someone can slip past inside the air ducts, they can get to the supply room where the rarer and stronger medicines will be kept."

"Okay so, who would go through?" The air duct can’t be that big so it would have to be someone pretty slim. Levi begins walking back the way we came, assuming everyone will follow...

Which, of course, we do...

We end up back at the nurse’s station. Levi grabs the step ladder Connie and I failed to spot earlier and places it in front of the back wall. Climbing up, he whistles to Mike who chucks a crowbar in his direction. Levi catches the crowbar with ease and shoves it in the air duct entrance. In no time, he rips the panel off the wall and passes it behind him, I grab it and gently place the panel on the counter, moving out the way when Levi jumps back down. He turns around whilst gesturing to the now, _very unenticing_ , hole in the wall.

"Whoever can fit in there I suppose."

Connie, Mikasa and I all share a knowing glance, then Mikasa and Connie look at each other, both thinking the same thing. Looking back up at the narrow hole, it’s easy to tell who will and who won’t fit through it. Mike is like a frickin’ tree so he’s a no go, Levi might be shorter but he's all fucking muscle and my shoulders are too broad.

And so that leaves…

"I guess Connie and I are going." Mikasa says it like she just offered to cook dinner. Her expression reveals nothing, but I find it hard to believe, after what happened earlier, that she’d be okay with this. Connie’s shoulders have gone tense but nods his agreement anyway.

"You don’t--"

"Whatever has to be done, I’m sure Mikasa and I will make a fine team." Connie chuckles nervously, cutting Levi off before he can give them an out. No one seems particularly pleased with the plan, but it’s all we got if we want to help everyone back at camp. Connie and Mikasa both empty their backpacks into mine and Levi’s so that they have room to pick up as many things as they can on the other end. Everyone walks over to the stepladder, still pushed up against the wall, and Levi gives the last instructions to them both.

"Once you get to the other end, if there seems to be any problems or.... it’s not like we thought it would be, just turn around and come back – fuck the drugs- your lives are more important. Grab anything useful you can find, Mikasa, you still got the list?" She nods at him.

"Yeah..." She runs a hand over the front of her jeans to double check herself and turns to Connie.

"I guess… ladies first." Connie gestures towards the ladder and smiles.

Mikasa doesn’t protest and starts to climb up the ladder. Moving to secure her backpack, the ladder shifts and Mikasa places one hand on the wall in front of her, the other reaching out for support from Levi, who grabs her hand whilst steadying the ladder with his foot.

She looks down at him, both exchanging words I can’t make out from over here. Mikasa reluctantly lets go of his hand, placing both on the edge of the air duct and begins to push herself up. She seems to fit okay and once her whole body is lost inside the dark entrance, Connie begins to step up himself. Levi places a hand on his shoulder, momentarily stopping him in his tracks and turns his face up towards the hole.

"Mikasa! You doing alright?!" Checking to make sure she’s not freaking out over the tight space, smart. I don’t think I’d be okay in there.

A few seconds of silence go by...

"Mikasa?" I repeat her name after Levi when there’s no reply.

"Yeah… yeah, I’m fine. It’s, it’s _just_ _great_ , my favourite part of the trip so far." Her attempt at sarcasm brings the tense atmosphere down a bit and Connie continues up the ladder.

Once both of them are inside, all we can do on _our_ side, is wait for them to come back...


	6. Just Another Tuesday

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So this chapter focuses on Mikasa and Connie's time on the other side of the hospital, following more story plot than relationship development. It gets creepy but they can handle it...maybe?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Took me slightly longer to write this chapter 'cause life....  
> It's a bit different and doesn't include as much Levi as I'd like but its all in the development right? Cool.  
> Hope you enjoy! :)
> 
> Kudos and comments are always appreciated so much! It's your feedback that keeps this story going <33

(Mikasa POV)

"So… what do you think we’re gonna find on the other end?" Connie hasn’t stopped talking since we got in the air duct. It’s kind of annoying but I think it’s keeping him calm.

"I don’t know Connie, hopefully just a…cabinet of drugs followed by no problems what so ever." Yeah right, since when did life choose to be that easy?

"How _old_ are you anyway… you know, if… if you don’t mind me asking, I was just wondering."

Sigh...

"I’m twenty-seven."

"Whoa really, I thought you were younger than that...! Huh, so… you and Eren have quite a large age gap then?"

"Yep."

"Is that ever weird, I guess you’re more like a mother figure sometimes, right?"

"I suppose."

"Me and my siblings were reasonably close in age, I was older but not by that much, but by enough to boss them around." He chuckles at this. "So was one of your parents Asian or-?"

"No, I was adopted."

"How does that work, they adopt you then have their own kid seventeen years later, what was Eren, like, a miracle baby?"

"I guess you could say that."

"Huh, cool! That’s gotta be pretty weird though right?"

"Connie, do you think we can stray away from the personal questions?"

"Sorry… I’ll be quiet."

The quiet lasted for about thirty seconds...

"You know, before everything happened, I was studying an English major… fat lot of good that’ll do me now. 'Stop fiendish walkers, for I hath book knowledge and language skills.' Yeah right, although who am I kidding, I was failing anyway, can’t even read a book to an excusable level."

"I’m sure you can do more than you’re giving yourself credit for."

God my elbows hurt, I’m starting to wish I’d worn something with long sleeves...

He scoffs.

"Before you got here, when I first arrived I was deemed pretty useless, bunch of the other guys told me to go wash dishes with Naomi and Linda. That’s when I met Sasha properly, she’d pretty much been cast aside for the same thing. Everyone seemed to think we were better off lying low… out of trouble, like we were some nuisance children or something. I insisted to Erwin countless times that we should be given a chance to prove ourselves but he was too concerned that we’d mess up."

"So how’d you end up joining the scouting group?"

"It was a day out in the woods; Sasha and I were out foraging with a larger group of people. There was a… trail of walkers that had separated from a hoard across the west-bound road a field over. A lot of people panicked because we didn’t have any of the 'fighters' so- to-speak with us. Sasha and I took care of the walkers and lead everyone back to camp. We showed them that we could be _useful,_ that we could _help_. When we got back to camp the story was relayed to Erwin and so we asked if we could join the scouting team again--"

Connie sighs at the memory.

"--But he just said no… again, but _then_ … Levi said that _he’d_ take us. He thought we should be given a chance to be useful, especially considering what we’d just done. Erwin deemed us to be Levi’s responsibility on scouting trips. I remember because Erwin asked Levi, 'And what if they’re killed?' and Levi just replied, 'Well, I guess that’s a few less mouths to feed isn’t it Erwin' ". Connie imitates Levi’s cold, deadpan expression, laughing at his own recollection of the story. "He trained us and helped us on our first few trips and within a couple weeks we were part of the main supply run team. Honestly that day was the first time I’d really spoken or seen much of the man at all, he was too intimidating and not the most approachable person in camp, but now… I trust him more than anyone. It’s because of him me and Sasha actually have a _purpose_ in the camp--"

My stomach flutters at Connie’s story; it makes me wonder how people can have such drastically different views on one person.

"--You know, I’m real glad you’re here Mikasa. Sasha was gonna come if you didn’t and… well, she wouldn’t have fared well in here.  I’d probably had to have done this on my own--"

I don’t really know what to say to that, so I say nothing. We’re both crawling practically on our stomachs, shuffling along on our elbows, the air getting thicker as we travel further through.

"--But hey! You know it could be worse!"

"Yeah, and how do you figure that?" I raise a sceptical eyebrow even though I know Connie can’t see it.

 "Well, you could not have such a _fine ass_." Connie laughs when I stop to kick him in the shoulder. We travel a bit further in silence until he starts whispering again. "If we don’t survive this, it’s not so much the thought of dying that upsets me you know, it’s whose left to miss me. All of my family were killed within the first _week_ , I don’t have any family left to cry when I don’t come back, you’re alright because you’ve got Eren but I…" He trails off.

I can feel my heart squeeze at Connie’s words but I really don’t want to hear them, I’m struggling enough to keep my own feelings squashed down let alone his as well.

"Connie I-"

"I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have gone there really, didn’t mean to bring the mood down, you don’t have to try comfort me or nothing. I just… wanted to get that out there." I stop moving then, surprising Connie when he smacks into the back of my boots. I turn my head around to look at him.

"Connie… look, we don’t know each other very well and… we don’t know what each other has been through." I sigh. "I haven’t made nice with a lot of people at camp since I arrived but it’s become clear to _me_ that _you_ have a lot of people who care about you, people who would be more than torn if you didn’t come back. You’ve got Sasha to worry about, Jean‘s your friend along with countless others. Even though you’ve lost your family, nothing’s stopping you from making a new one… and you have." I turn my head back to face the front. "I fight because Eren needs me to, but at the end of the day… I believe he’d be alright if I didn’t come back. Eren makes family everywhere he goes, whereas I just manage to isolate myself even more--"

I turn my head back to look at him again.

"--So don’t start undermining the value of your _own_ life due to your incorrect preconceptions of its value to others. People care for you Connie, so don’t take that for granted."

I face forward and start moving again.

"Mikasa…"

"We should probably try be more quiet from now on, I think we’re almost over the main infested room from earlier."

Connie doesn’t say anything else after that as we can begin to hear groaning from below us...

 

It takes about another ten minutes to get to the other end. It’s quiet as I use the tools Mike gave me to take off the panel, it’s fiddley but the gaps between the bars are just wide enough for me to get my slim fingers through. Connie and I jump down onto a desk splayed with papers and take in the dead silent room around us.

"Seems like the coast is clear." Connie starts walking to the only door in the room and peeks through it. "I guess we have a look and see if we can find the supply room, shouldn’t be too difficult."

I nod slowly, looking around the room again. Apart from some office supplies lying around, the room is weirdly still put together- compared to where we just came from.

It gave me a bad feeling in the pit of my stomach...

I readjust my backpack and the knife on my belt before following Connie out into the hallway. It was slightly more of what you would expect out here but the atmosphere had a strange stillness to it, the walls were clear of blood which was surprising because bodies still littered various ends of the hallway. Weird scratches stretched horizontally along the walls leading all the way down to the other end, beyond what our eyes could see from here.

"Still seems clear, bloody lucky considering." Connie looks at me, probably expecting me to share his relief. I search his face for any indication he may feel what I feel…

But he just turns around and soldiers on, so I cautiously follow.

We bypass several rooms until something looks quite promising. The door is still completely shut unlike the others and the sign reads, 'Supply… something something... STAFF ONLY', the middle of the door looks like it’s been knocked in a bit so some words are hard to make out. I peer through the tiny window and it looks empty inside, there are small bottles and boxes all over the floor which is extremely promising. I try the door knob which clicks open immediately; I sigh in relief but part of me wonders why someone would have tried to knock the door down if it was just unlocked anyway. We both enter the room slowly but I stop when something catches my eye.

"I wonder why this is the only room with blood in it?" Connie looks at me, quietly voicing my concerns.

The bad feeling in the pit of my stomach increases two fold...

"Perhaps someone was just… real unlucky in this room." I can’t make eye contact with Connie and decide to focus on the positives instead. I point to the bottles lining the shelves. "Look. That’s what we came for. Let’s just… pack them up and get out." I suddenly really want to get this over and done with as soon as possible and Connie showed absolutely no sign of arguing with that.

The shelves hold most of the medicines on the list so we made sure to take at least one of each and then fill our packs up with the ones we thought could end up being in higher demand. I wonder what the other three are doing whilst we’re over here, have they gone back to searching for stuff themselves…?

Are they just waiting for us…?

Could something have gone wrong their end…?

I’m taken out of my thoughts when I feel Connie tap my shoulder...

"Hey, Mikasa…you alright?" I turn around to see Connie’s concerned expression.

"Yeah, I’m fine, why?" Connie’s concern quickly evaporates and turns to confusion.

"Oh, I… I thought I heard you crying…but…"

"What, no! I wasn’t crying, what made you think…" Connie’s eyes widen as we both freeze.

Out of the silence came a faint, distant whining cry as if someone was sobbing down the hallway. I look at Connie’s pale face and he lowers his voice so I’m barely able to hear it myself.

"It..it could… be a dog?"

"That doesn’t sound like a dog."

"Well perhaps it’s someone whose hurt, maybe we should go see if they need help.’

"…Maybe… I guess someone could have been trapped in here, or…"

The whining stops momentarily. I find it weird that it only just started, Connie and I had been moving around in this wing for almost forty minutes now and we hadn’t heard anything before.

It starts again...

"Do you think they heard us?"

"I don’t know, I suppose if it’s someone on their own they may be concerned to approach a couple of strangers. We could be dangerous for all they know."

"Yeah, I suppose…"   Connie nods his head; his face looks as if he’s trying to come to some kind of decision. "Do you think we should go see if we can find them and help?"

"I suppose… we can’t really just leave them here… right?"

"Right..."

We finish putting the final bottles in our packs and head very slowly out the door of the supply room, we continue to pass more empty patient rooms until we come to a pair of open double doors. Once we’re through the doors the décor of the hospital changes slightly, somehow taking on an even blander theme than before. I look to my left where a massive blue sign reads 'PSYCHIATRIC WARD' in white letters.

"We probably shouldn’t go too much further, the psychiatric wings in the next block and Levi said to stick with just E… maybe we should just turn back." The whining gets louder when Connie stops whispering.

We stop walking...

"It sounds like a woman."

"...It sounds… wrong." Connie looks at me.

"What do you mean?"

"I don’t know, something just isn’t right about it." This seems to unsettle Connie a lot and he grabs my wrist.

"I think maybe we should turn back." His eyes are wider again and his nails dig into my skin.

"We have to check to see if someone needs help Connie, what if it was one of our people hurt or trapped, we’d want someone to help them." Connie’s grip loosens but he doesn’t let go of my sleeve, this leading to me cautiously dragging him behind me as I approach the room where I think the noise is coming from. The crying has quietened down again. I wasn’t lying when I said it sounded wrong, in some ways it sounded like a human cry, not so much one of pain but more like an emotional anguish...

As if you just heard someone you loved was gonna die...

Or just _watched_ someone you loved die...

The crying took on different tones which then made the human sound come out more like a growl, a high pitched gurgling sound that made the hairs on my arm stand on end. We stop outside another pair of double doors which read 'RECREATION ROOM', the door was shut but had a wide panel window in the centre. The window was covered in scratches but I could just about make out the inside of the room. I peek through to see if I could spot anyone inside.

"I can’t see any… wait…" In the far right corner of the room there’s a small figure crouched behind a broken record player. "There's somebody in there!" The figure moves slightly and I get a better look. Connie lets go of my sleeve and goes to peer through the window himself but I quickly grab hold of his jacket before he can move anymore.

"Wait!" In my panic I almost forget to whisper. "Something isn’t …I think you're right, we should just turn back..."

"But you just said there was somebody _in_ there, we should help them!"

"No Connie, whoever or… whatever is in there is beyond our help, we need to leave-"

"I don’t understand, are they bit, they’re crying so they’re clearly still conscious." He rips my grasp from his jacket and peers through the window.

"Connie it’s not…"

"I can’t _see_ _anyone_." He looks at me and I push him out the way to see for myself, the figure behind the record player was gone, but something was still crying...

And this time it was coming from the direction we just came from.

"Connie we need to leave…Now!" I grab hold of his sleeve and start to pull him down the hallway back to the beginning.

"I don’t understand Mikasa, who was in there, you said you saw someone but… what did you see?"

"It doesn’t matter Connie, we just need to get back to Levi and the others." I start walking faster, still pulling Connie along behind me. He struggles at first but woman or not, the kid had nothing on me. The crying gets quieter as we make our way further down the hallway, until it stops all together.

I couldn’t decide whether this made me feel better or not...

We enter the room where we first entered through the air duct; I swing Connie inside and shove a chair under the door handle.

"So we’re just leaving whoever that was behind?!" I look up at him, a stern expression on my face.

"Yes Connie! We are leaving whatever the FUCK that was behind and we’re getting the hell out of here." I peer down at the floor to find something we can stand on to help us get back up to the hole in the wall, then I notice the scratches covering the floor. "Were these here when we first came through?" I look back up to Connie, pointing my finger frantically at the floor as he looks down, all the blood disappearing from his face.

"I…I don’t think…so." I feel nauseous now, what the hell is going on? "What the hell made these scratches; we haven’t seen anyone or _anything_ come back this way since we got here."

"I suppose…" I try to collect my thoughts. "… something could have come this way when we were in the supply room."

"SHIT! What the _fuck_ are we gonna do Mikasa, what the hell is going on, what did you see back there!?"

"I don’t _know_ Connie but it couldn’t have been _that."_ I gesture at the scratches again and I brush the papers off of the desk, gesturing for Connie to get up. "Let’s just get back before it appears again, okay?" Connie nods and begins climbing up the desk, he places both hands on the edge of the air duct and stops.

"Hey Mikasa… you might wanna come look at this…" Connie doesn’t turn around but moves aside slightly so I can climb up to stand beside to him. I look down the tunnel and see scratches lining all four walls inside as if Freddy Krueger went through doing a fucking Mexican wave.

"Whatever it was…looks like it’s found a way out."

Suddenly the crying starts again but it's closer this time, as if someone was sat right outside the door of this room...

"What are we gonna do? This thing or…  _Things_ are clearly _fucking_ with us." Connie looks at me for some kind of instruction and I pull the knife out of my belt. He’s right, I can’t help but feel like one of those small animals you see on the documentary channel, the one you pity as its lead into the predators trap.

"We’re gonna go through the tunnel and make sure whatever it _is_ doesn’t make it to the others… okay?" I look Connie in the eye. "It’s gonna be fine Connie, I promise, just another Tuesday during the apocalypse, right?"

Just like any-other-Tuesday...

Fuck

 

(Levi POV)

"Looks like all the rooms left around this block were wiped clean." Mike appears from around the corner holding a couple of bottles, his scavenging results from after almost forty minutes. Jean and I stayed behind to keep an eye on the hole whilst Mike scouted the remaining area.

"Better hope the other two are having better luck their end then." Fuck, this was a stupid idea, we have no bloody clue what could be in that area of the hospital.

"How much longer do you think they’ll be?" Jean's slouched against the nurses station, his hands in his pockets.

"I don’t fucking _know_ Jean, can’t exactly pick up the phone anymore." I didn’t mean to snap at the kid but I was so tense just…waiting.

Sigh...

"Sorry." He whispers with all the attitude of a typical teenager, I look at the kid and it’s obvious he’s just as worried as I am.

"No, I’m sorry, hardly the time to be a dick." I’m leant up against the wall just underneath the air duct, my arms folded.

"No I get it, you’re worried, you can be a dick if it helps." Cheeky sod.

From watching the kid interact for most of the day, it’s easy to see he’s developed quite a crush on Eren’s sister, hell, even before the apocalypse I bet getting the attention from a pretty girl like that was a rare occurrence for the guy.

Having said that…

First day out scouting and I ask her to crawl through an air duct over a walker infested hospital wing to the complete unknown – I’d be surprised if she wants to talk to _me_ much after this.

"So… whatchya do before the end of the world Mike?" Clearly Jeans decided that empty conversation is better than silence for now on.

"I worked in a post office."

"Seriously!?"

"Yes."

"Wow… wasn’t really expecting that. I just… expected a more physical job I suppose. You just seem very capable."

"People adapt when they need to, that’s human nature." Jean looks over at me.

"Yeah, I get that but he’s so...big, and…"

"What, big people can’t work in post offices?" I raise an eyebrow at him, Jean's face taking on a red sheen.

It’s fun to wind the kid up.

It’s a welcome distraction-

Plus it’s too damn easy; he’s almost as bad as Eren.

"No that’s _not_ what I meant…"

"So what did _you_ do before it all went to shit?"

"I was a philosophy major."

"Okay so great, you went from wondering whether that dudes cat in the box was dead or not to smashing in zombie heads. See, even you were able to adapt."

"You mean _Schrodinger’s_ cat!"

"I don’t care if it was fucking _Dumbledore’s_ cat, the point is, what people did before no longer matters."

"Well yeah, you _would_ say that wouldn’t you." I step forwards but Mike stands in between the two of us.

"Listen..." He doesn’t raise his voice because he doesn’t need to.

We listen...

There’s a distant banging and thumping of metal coming from the direction of the air duct.

"They’re coming back!" Jean steps forward then looks at me.

"They’re moving pretty fast..." Almost frantically. I look up at Mike whose sniffing the air, like you’d expect from your friendly neighbourhood postman. "What is it?"

"Smells like fear."

I’ll tell you, sometimes it’s really hard to take the guy seriously, but right now, I’m concerned enough to take anything into account.

"Something must have happened." The metal thumping gets louder and we wait for either of their heads to appear from amidst the empty hole.

What the fuck’s going on?

 

(Mikasa POV)

Connie and I are moving as fast as we can through the tunnels, the scratches still lining the inside making rough metal edges that keep catching on my arms.

"What do we do if the… whatever it is, is still in here?"

"I don’t _know_ Connie."

"What if it’s too dangerous?"

"I don’t _know_ Connie."

"Do you think it was human?"

"I don’t _know_ Connie?"

"What if it’s killed the others at the other end?"

"Connie! Please! I don’t _know_ okay, I don’t _know_ what it was or what the thing _behind_ us was but they are all fine the other end regardless, you hear me." Connie’s in front this time, it’s not like either position felt particularly safer than the other considering there is supposedly some unknown creature in front and some crying, disfigured figure behind us. The duct itself feels a lot tighter than on the way here, probably because we’re in more of a rush. The tunnels turn off in various directions which I peer down when we crawl past but it’s so dark that if something was down one of them I wouldn’t be able to see it anyway.

"We’re nearly there." The light at the end, so to speak, has come into focus and I think I can hear Levi and Jean squabbling. The knot in my stomach loosens a bit and I release a sigh.

"Come on, let’s get out of here - maybe it went another way." Connie speeds up a bit, loud metal thumps sounding from where his elbows hit the walls either side.

"Look! It’s Connie!" I can hear Jean as Connie emerges his head out of the air duct.

"Oh my God, get me the fuck out of here!" Levi helps Connie manoeuvre himself so he can slide out and jump down.

"What the hell happened to you gu-?"

"Where’s Mikasa?" I can hear Levi interrupt Jean before I can peak my own head out.

"She’s right behind me…there’s something else in this fucking hospital man!"

"What?" Jean and Levi ask at the same time. I finally push my torso half out the hole when everyone looks up at me.

"Mikasa tell them what you saw!"

"Mikasa?" I look over at Levi who starts forward to help me and grabs my hand.

"It…" I feel something scratch the inside of my right leg and grab hold of my ankle, but before I can do anything it drags me back into the tunnel.

I can hear the echo of my own scream as my hand is ripped out of Levi’s.


	7. Stargazing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What the hell dragged Mikasa into that tunnel? Well the guys have to come up with a plan to kill it but who has to put their life on the line to do so?

(Mikasa POV)

Oh

Hell

No

I have not survived this far to be killed in a fucking air duct tunnel...

As soon as my hand was ripped from Levi’s, my mind went into a panic, then it went blank…

…then the adrenaline kicked in.

There’s hardly any room inside the tunnel and the thing trying to crawl on top of me weighs seemingly next to nothing.

So I kick.

I use the heel of my boot, flail my legs and kick with everything I have. I kick towards the creature until its body is no longer hovering over my own and I keep throwing all the force of my lower half into it whilst I grab the knife from my belt.

I can hear the distant commotion of everyone else who would have watched me be pulled back in here like something out of a fucking poltergeist movie.

God, I can’t believe this is happening.

I can hardly see anything inside the tunnel so I have to rely on my ears, listening over my own heavy breathing.

The creature squeals, definitely not human, and I can feel it start to shove back. As I pull my left leg back up, ready for another kick, I feel it grab my ankle again and it starts to pull, ready to take me back to wherever it hoards its prizes I imagine.

But I am _no_ _one’s_ prize.

I am Mikasa. Fucking. Ackerman.

I sit up as fast as I can and shove my knife into whatever I can find, I can’t see where I hit the creature but I feel the knife go in deep. It lets go of my leg and I immediately start to scramble backwards as fast as I can, the screeching gets louder the longer it takes me to get away, my elbows scraping the edges of the wall as I move as fast as I can. I can’t see behind me so I’m just hoping I’ll fall onto something soft and squidgy when I topple out the other end, because you know, I’ve just been _that_ lucky _so_ far.

I hear the creature start to clunk around in the tunnel again and I assume it managed to pull my knife out of whatever squishy part I hit.

"DAMN IT! Can you just give a girl a _FUCKING BREAK_!"

Just as I thought I was gonna be dragged back again, somebody grabs me under my arms from behind and I’m pulled out of the hole. I’m weightless for a moment and laid out on the ground, all within what felt like seconds. My head is swimming but I turn to look up at the commotion behind me, Jean, Connie and Mike are staring at the hole, guns and knives in hand, waiting for whatever’s in there to come out. I start to sit up and a hand runs down the side of my injured leg.

I wince...

"Ouch!" I look up to scowl at Levi whose looking at my leg with concern.

Concern-

An actual expression-

Aaaand, it’s gone, back to the unreadable. I wonder if I’ll ever get to see a smile again.

Hardly the time Mikasa!

Sigh...

My head is spinning at a million miles an hour; I run my hands down the front of my body to double check…

Yep

I am, in fact, still alive. Okay. Cool.

The spinning makes it feel like a dream, is this really happening, maybe it _is_ a dream. Perhaps all these people are just an elaborate figment of my imagination. I mean…

I even gave them back stories. No. Too elaborate, I’m not nearly creative enough to come up with all this inside my head.

Which means this is reality and we are still being hunted by whatever the fuck just tried to assault me in that tunnel.

I should probably try help…Kill it? Yeah that would be a good idea. Where do we even start though, I don’t even know what it really looks like let alone if it can bleed?

Well… it can screech which means it can feel pain so that’s a start. And it can cry… not sure what that means.

I need to stand up and do _something,_ but nothings coming together. Brain, tell the legs to do the leg thing and make me move!

Nothing...

_"Mikasa!"_

Oh God, what am I gonna do now! Is this it?

_"Mikasa!"_

I’m so tired...

_"Mikasa!"_

Am I in shock? Is this what shock feels like? Am I having another freak out, no- please God, it’s hardly the time.

I feel two hands cup the sides of my face, forcing me to look into Levi’s eyes.

"Mikasa, you need to snap out of this so we can kill whatever’s in that tunnel!"

Right...

"Sorry..." I close my eyes and gather my thoughts.

Kill it.

 

(Levi POV)  


Mikasa’s obviously in shock, she’s looking right at me whilst I say her name but showing no acknowledgment whatsoever. I cup the sides of her face, my eyes constantly flicking back up to the air duct, making sure nothings come through.

"Mikasa, you need to snap out of this so we can kill whatever’s in that tunnel!" We need to sort this out fast and get back to camp, it’s the first time we’ve encountered something slightly different to the norm walker.

God, Hange’s gonna have a field day with this...

"Sorry." Mikasa closes her eyes and appears to become a bit more lucid.

"Mikasa, do you have _any_ idea what is in that tunnel, what grabbed you? We need to know how easy it could be to kill."

"No… I mean I may have caught a glimpse of it but… I don’t know. I think it _was_ human, some time ago, which means it probably has the same general anatomy." Okay, that’s a start. We both look up when a loud clanging comes from within the air duct. Jean and Mike load their guns whilst Connie takes a step back, clearly still shaken by what they encountered the other end.

I stand up and offer Mikasa my hand.

"Can you stand? Your leg doesn’t appear to be hurt too bad, you’re bleeding a bit but it’ll hold on." She takes my hand and stands on two wobbly legs.

"Thanks." She lets go as soon as she’s steady and we walk over to the others.

"Connie is there anything-" I stop half way when a quiet whimper comes from the tunnel.

It’s crying?

"What the _fuck?"_

"Oh God, not again." Connie’s face has gone completely pale.

"It kept doing that when we were over the other side, I…I think there might be two of them as well." Mikasa looks at me then.

"Is there _anything_ you picked up on that we could use to understand how this thing might work?"

"We didn’t exactly get time for a long personal chat with the thing!" Connie gestures wildly at the hole. "Can’t you just go in there and get rid of it! Make it go away, FIX IT, PLEASE!"

"No Connie, because I have no idea what _it_ is…" Connie’s on the verge of a full blown freak out, which we don’t have time for and as much as I appreciate his vote of confidence I’m not some fucking all-powerful killing machine. "I just need you or Mikasa to give me something we can use to figure out a-"

"Blood!" I look over to Mikasa who looks as if she’s pieced some shit together.

"Blood?" We all say in unison.

"Care to elaborate?" I raise an eyebrow but I can feel myself getting inpatient. Mikasa lowers her voice.

"When we were over there, I thought it was strange but I just kinda let it go… there was none -blood that is. There was no blood anywhere, well, apart from this one room…" She starts thinking again and looks up at Connie. "Your head, it was bleeding right?"

"Yeah?" Connie subconsciously lifts his hand to adjust the bandage still wrapped around his head due to his and Jean’s stupidity earlier.

"Maybe…maybe there was no blood because those things… consumed it all."

"You what!? Like a vampire?" The younger boy's voice rises.

"Connie shut up." I turn back to Mikasa and gesture for her to keep going.

"I wonder if maybe those things were drinking the blood of… of humans and ran out. There was one room in there which still had a lot in but the door looked as if something tried to break in so… maybe, maybe they couldn’t get in there before it dried… I don’t know. When Connie went over there, the smell of Connie’s _fresh blood_ might have woken them up or something."

"So you think that these things consume blood and that we could… use it to lure that thing out?" It wasn’t a rhetorical, I wanted confirmation but she looked worried when I asked, clearly concerned I thought she was talking bullshit. She slowly nods her head.

"I… I guess?" I step up to her.

"Mikasa Ackerman, thank you for not being useless and for using your brain, you make quite the refreshing company."

"Hey!" I look over at Jean and Connie’s protest. "Well yeah, but still…harsh." I turn back to Mikasa whose gone bright red, I worry for a second that she hurt herself more than I originally thought when she won’t look me in the eye.

"We could use my leg!" She says abruptly.

"Your leg...? What, as _bait_?! No." I refuse immediately. 

"Well it’s all we have to use right now!" She gestures over towards Connie and Jean. "Connie’s head is already healed up too much by now and unless you wanna whack Jean over the head with your crowbar then it’s the best and only option we have." She pokes me in the chest when I shrug my shoulder at the Jean suggestion. "Levi!"

"You know she’s right Levi." Shut up Mike. I turn around and look at the others, then back to Mikasa.

I sigh..

"Fine..."

"What, you can’t seriously be agreeing to this?!" Jean steps forward, chest puffed out. 

"I am Jean and unless you’re volunteering to get a crowbar round the side of the head, I suggest you shut up." He doesn’t.

"Why do you think it hasn’t come out yet?" It was a reasonable question. 

"Might be that its aware of being out numbered and that it could just be shot when it comes out." I gesture nonchalantly towards the hole.

"That’s…surprisingly intelligent." I look over at him.

"You know, every so often I have the same thought about you--" He pouts then and leaves me to think.

Okay...

"--I think it’s more likely to show itself if most of us leave…" The crying in the tunnel continues. "Mike, Connie and Jean, you’ll go out the door and be ready as back up with guns loaded,  Mikasa will stay to lure it out with her leg and I’ll kill it."

"How… I mean, how you gonna kill it?" Connie’s come up to stand next to me and Mikasa.

I shrug...

"Dunno, depends what happens when it comes out, I wanna do it in the quickest and quietest way possible. If what Mikasa says is true and there’s more than one around here, we don’t wanna draw anything else near with gunshots."

 

The other three gather their things and leave the room, leaving the door ajar so they’re able to rush in and help if need be.

The plan still doesn’t sit well with me...

"We’re switching positions."

"What!?" Mikasa turns around fast to look at me. "But that makes no sense…"

"It’s stupid to make you bait, your leg isn’t even that bad…"

"So! Why should _you_ be bait then, you’re not even bleeding--!"

I grab the knife from my belt and slice the inside of my hand in one swift motion, creating a more noticeable and deeper wound than Mikasa’s...

"--Urrgh! You idiot!" She grabs my arm making me open up my hand.

"Well now we can switch. I’ll stay in the middle of the room and wait for it to come out whilst you be ready from the left to kill it when it tries to kill me, okay?"

"No!"

"Well too bad! Now shut up and _do_ what I told you to do!" She looks angry, which is actually quite a refreshing expression to see on her face, you can see the fire underneath.

"Fine." She clips it out and grabs the crowbar from the side table. Just as Mikasa begins to walk into position there’s a thudding of metal coming from the tunnel, she hurry’s and crouches behind a filing cabinet to the left of the air duct. I lean on the desk behind me and inspect my hand, blood running down my forearm, it’s deeper than I would have initially planned but I did it impulsively… which is very unlike me.

The crying has stopped and there’s a feeling of tension building in the air. I lower my arm and clench my knuckles, making my blood drip onto the floor.

Come on girl, you know you want it...

Sigh...

What a total bullshit day.

There’s a sudden loud screech from the tunnel and something flings itself out of the hole, launching itself at me with almost perfect precision. I duck and roll to the left making the creature smack head first into the desk I was leaning on – anyone else would have a had a face full of whatever-the-fuck- _that_ -is. The creature composes itself and I get a better look at it, it’s a human like figure but there’s no sign of any fat on the body at all, the bone shapes sticking through the thin layer of skin. The skin itself taking on a sickly grey blue, there's no hair anywhere I can see and it’s hunched over at an almost ninety-degree angle.

Not a good look...

The thing moves its head slowly to look at me, its eyes are sunken in but one has a large, deep gash running through it. It lowers its face to the ground to smell the blood that had dripped from my hand earlier before.

Gross-

That’s when it pounced again and this time I wasn’t so ready for it, distracted by the creature’s appearance. It grabs hold of my wounded arm and shoves me to the ground, its body feels like it weighs next to nothing but its grip was still too strong to be human. I manage to position my knife and shove it into the jugular, causing a hysterical scream to break from the creature on top of me.

"Nice to know you can feel pain." It lowers its face and screams louder, closer to my own, a horrible wailing noise that makes the hair on the back of my neck stand on end. The grip on my arm gets tighter and I can feel the blood begin to escape at a rapidly quicker pace. "Aargh, FUCK!" I have to scrunch my eyes shut for a second as every nerve in my right arm screams at me. Just as I open them again I see the crowbar enter through the creature’s skull from the right and come out the other side.

The grip on my arm immediately loosens and I push the fucking thing off of me...

"Shit! Are you okay!?" I hear Mikasa kneel down next to me but I lay my head back down for a second and relax my arm on my chest. I close my eyes again to momentarily check myself.

Okay, cool...

Still alive-

I sense Mikasa move out of my peripheral and when she comes back she picks up my hand, wrapping it in what I assume are some bandages she found. I still haven’t opened my eyes.

"We’ll need to stitch this properly when we get back. That was a stupid plan from the beginning!" She whisper shouts whilst she works.

"Well it _did_ work didn’t it?" I open my eyes then and start to sit up. "By the way, 'A' plus on your crowbar skills." I smile at her but she just rolls her eyes, looking purposely out in the opposite direction, her cheeks going pink. We both look over to the creature currently splayed out on its back.

"What the hell do you think it is?"

"I don’t know… not sure I wanna know, but I’ll talk to Hange about it when we get back." Mikasa just finishes wrapping my hand when the other three come back into the room.

"HOLY SHIT!" Connie runs up to look at the corpse. "You killed it!"

"Well… Mikasa did." I glance over to her again but she's still avoiding looking at me, choosing to stare at my hand which catches Connie’s attention.

"Shit! Did it get you!?"

"No! He used _himself_ as bait in the end." Mikasa lifts my arm to show them her handy work in wrapping my wound.  
  
"Of course he did." Mike chuckles and I scowl at him, don’t act like you know me postman. Jean walks over to us, putting his gun away in its holster.

"Are you alright Mikasa?" Of course he wanted to check up on _her_.

I’m fine by the way, in case anyone wanted to know!

"Yeah, I’m fine; it didn’t really come near me." She still hasn’t let go of my arm but I sit up completely and pinch the bridge of my nose with my free hand.

"You have no idea how hard it was to stay out there knowing what was going on." How noble of you Jean, such gallantry, such bravery...

"We should get going, it’s gonna start getting dark soon and I need to fill Erwin in on all the _shit_ that’s happened today."  I stand up then, making Mikasa let go of me.

Everyone grabs their things, including the drugs we _actually_ came all the way here for and head out the door.

"What about the other creature?" Connie jogs to walk beside me and I kick the doors open with my boot. 

"Well, why do you think we’re _leaving_ Connie?" I don’t turn around.

"Oh, yeah, I guess… I just don’t like the thought of there being more out there, you know?"

Yeah… that’s gonna suck.

 

 

(Eren POV)

"Do you think they’ll be back soon?" Furlan said the sun would be going down soon, which means they _should_ be, right? I look up at Ravi.

"Yeah, I’m sure they won’t be much longer Eren, just be patient, your sister will be fine."

"Okay…" I’m sat inside the medic tent watching Ravi patch up some dude’s arm who snagged it on a thorn bush. Pfft, end of the world and this guy can’t handle the fuckin’ shrubs – I can hear Levi say it in my mind. Everything’s boring when Levi’s not here, Krista’s mum is super paranoid so won’t let her do much if it involves going two feet away from camp and there’re no other kids my age to play with.

I tried to talk to that Alice girl today; she’s a few years younger than me. Hange and Furlan mentioned her earlier ‘cause of her dad but Levi had already told me I should get to know her. He said she’d probably like a friend like me, I kinda thought he said it just to try get rid of me at first, which he probably did, but I think Alice does need a friend. When I tried to talk to her today though, her dad was around so I didn’t stay for very long.

Her dad didn’t seem to like me.

"Do you think Levi would teach me how to use a gun properly at some point, my sister never let me learn, so…" I look back up to Ravi again, ignoring the guy hissing next to him as the needle went into his arm.

"Um, I mean, if your sister says its okay, I don’t see why not." Damn, I was worried he’d say that.

"She’d never be okay with it." Ravi just shrugs in response. "Where’re you from anyway, ‘cause you don’t sound like everyone else around here?" He laughs.

"You don’t have much of a filter do you Eren?" It’s my turn to shrug this time. He sighs. "I was studying in the state but I’m originally from England, I came over here to finish my medic training."

"Huh, England? – Cool." Ravi finishes stitching up the other guys arm and tells him he’s good to go. "Do you ever worry about your family back in England?" Ravi looks sad at this and I wonder if I shouldn’t have asked, Mikasa always said I had a bad habit of asking inappropriate questions.

"Yeah, I do…but there’s not much I can do over here so I try to just focus on helping the people I can." I don’t know what to say to that so I just nod.

"Ravi…" Erwin pokes his head into the tent then and gestures behind him. "…the others have just returned but might need a bit of medical attention." I immediately spring up and push past Erwin to see my sister. I find them around the truck; Levi’s talking to Hange whilst the others are unpacking things from their bags.

"Mikasa!" I run up and throw my arms around her; she winces, buckling slightly on her right leg when Jean grabs her arm to help steady her.

"Thanks." She finishes steadying herself and Jean lets go. Good.

"Are you hurt?" I scrunch my eyebrows together.

"It’s nothing bad, just my leg, I’ll be fine though."

"Okay... h-how’d it go?" Mikasa isn’t looking at me and I turn around to find Levi walking away in a quiet conversation with Erwin and Hange. "Mikasa?"

"Sorry, it was… we got everything we needed so it was fine." She looked really tired so I pull her slowly towards Ravi’s tent to get her patched up.

"Good. No problems then, I was looking forward to some stories." I smile at her but she just looks down.

"No, no stories." She tries to smile but I know it wasn’t real. I know what a real Mikasa smile looks like and I haven’t seen one in a while.

 

 

-4 days later-

(Mikasa POV)

It’s been a few days now since the hospital trip and word had gotten out about the new creature. Erwin did his best to calm the potential panic it could create and what a job he did, it was made clear the scouting team were looking into it and that we were confident it wasn’t to become a common encounter.

But what the hell do _we_ know?

It almost _killed_ _me_...

But that was all political bullshit to keep the peace; the guy could probably talk anyone down from a ledge given the circumstance.

Once we got back to camp my life pretty much fell back into the original routine, my leg was checked by Ravi and he deemed it a mere flesh wound. The thing didn’t actually bite me so I wouldn’t ‘catch’ anything so to speak. Only one other smaller scouting mission has been out since to gather basic food supplies, I think Hange and that are still discussing what the other creature could have been and how we could tackle them in the future.

And whilst they’re doing that, I’m left to ruminate in my own concerns...

Because I still don’t really have anyone to talk to.

Nanaba and Linda let me help with dinner every so often and Ravi gives me odd jobs to do around the medic tent, but since I still don’t have an official job position myself, I’m just drifting, existing amongst others who actually _have_ a purpose. I do _know_ a lot more people now though and it’s nice to see friendly faces around for a change.

I’m sat around the fire pit, the sun starting to go down as dinner is served.  Jean’s sat on my right and Pixis is on my left, busy telling me a story from his ‘eccentric youthful days’. Furlan’s sat the other side of the old man, making sure to keep the story on some kind of relevant track. 

The old guy has a habit of digressing...

"…and that’s how I was the true inventor… of the Manhattan cocktail…"

Okay?

Furlan and I look at each other and laugh, the dude was crazy but definitely knew how to tell an interesting story.

"That’s awesome Pixis, I’m sure every part of that story was definitely true...." Furlan smiles at the man.

"You laugh boy but you should respect your elders." Pixis stands from his place on the log bench and turns to look at us. "No matter how absurd their stories become." He chuckles at that and begins to walk away. Furlan glides over to me, filling in the space Pixis just left.

"I hope I live long enough to become a crazy old man…" I whack him in the side.

"Don’t call him crazy!" My reprimanding is foiled by my own smile.

"I’m not saying it’s a bad thing…" I just roll my eyes and we’re quiet for a moment. "What do _you_ miss most from the world before?" I find the question rather out of the blue.

"Why?"

"Well… we just spent the last 20 minutes listening to Pixis reminisce about cocktails so I think it’s clear what he misses. I was just wondering what Mikasa Ackerman thinks about when she lays awake at night."

"Hah, um, well first of all… stop thinking about me lying awake at night, ‘cause that’s creepy." Furlan laughs and I shrug my shoulders. "…I don’t know, I suppose just the little things…" He looks at me then with an unimpressed expression. "I don’t know Furlan, it’s a hard question! What do _you_ miss then?"

"That’s easy, my dog." Well now I feel like an asshole.

"That’s a really good answer. Damn you."

"Ha, his name was Frankie and he was a hundred and twenty-six pound golden retriever."

"Holy crap."

"Yeah, he liked his food did Frankie." Furlan nods his head fondly and smiles. He leans forward so he can see Jean next to me. "Yo, Jean, what do _you_ miss most?"

Jean’s face takes on a deep look suggesting great thought is being put into his answer – until…

"I’m gonna have to say, grilled cheese sandwiches."

"Seriously!?" I raise my eyebrows at him but Furlan goes up for a high five.

"Dude, yes, good answer."

"What the fuck, you think _that’s_ a good answer but you got annoyed at _me_?"

"He clearly felt strongly about the sandwiches Mikasa, you just need to try harder."

Uuuuggh

"Boys are weird."  I get up to leave when Furlan starts to talk again.

"I’m gonna need an answer at some point Mikasa, a good one, it’s gonna be on the test."

"The test?" I look at him in scepticism.

"Yeah, didn’t anyone tell you, the apocalypse test – better get studying Ackerman…"

"Whoa whoa, dude, is there actually gonna be a test?" Connie looks concerned from his place next to Jean.

"Don’t be a moron Connie." Furlan rolls his eyes and smiles back at me.

"You’re _all_ morons." I point my finger at them and walk away, back to my tent.

 

Everyone called it a night about two hours ago and I still can’t sleep...

Eren’s passed out next to me; he still manages to sleep like a bloody rock whilst I lay awake most nights praying to God I get some rest, but to no avail. I sit up in ‘bed’ and hear someone walk passed our tent, probably on night watch. At least six people are assigned to one night, walking around in pairs so that they can cover the whole perimeter of the field and watch the surrounding woods.

Once the person has gone I get up and quietly leave, checking to make sure I haven’t disturbed Eren on my way out. The night air is still pretty humid so I don’t bother taking a jacket; the outside is eerily quiet with few lights keeping the camp in relative darkness. I slowly make my may down the left side of the field and breathe in the night air; you can feel the tinge of coolness in the wind as colder weather is on the way. I don’t really know where I’m going but I kinda hoped it would help clear my head and allow my body to sleep for a change.

The camp feels smaller at night with no one around and I soon find myself walking back up towards the centre fire pit. I’m stood outside Hange’s campervan and look up to find a black boot hanging over the edge of the roof. Eren told me Levi stayed outside at night, sleeping on Hange’s roof to keep watch when he can’t sleep.

I haven’t actually spoken to the man since the day at the hospital.

Although I’m not really sure what I’d say...

Not really sure what I wanna say...

I think about going up to see if he’s awake, Eren spends time with him almost every day, why shouldn’t I get five minutes. I start towards the back end of the van where a ladder leads to the roof; I climb up slowly, cringing when it creaks under my weight.

Oops..

I hope I’m not bothering anyone inside trying to sleep. I get to the top, peaking my head over the edge to see Levi lying down with his left arm strewn across his eyes.

"I swear to god Hange if you try to push me off this _fucking_ roof again I _will_ kill you." I can’t help the smile that spreads across my lips.

"Actually, it’s just me… but I’m sorry to hear that _that’s_ a thing that’s been happening." I let a laugh slip at the end, surprising myself. Levi removes his arm and turns his head to look at me. He doesn’t say anything and… neither do I.

Then we sit in a rather uncomfortably long pause of silence…

"Can I _help_ you with something?" He’s still looking at me, probably waiting for me to explain why I came up here, annoyed I disturbed his time alone.

Why did I come up here?

His expression doesn’t reveal any indication that he wants me to leave, so…

"Just… thought I’d see if you were… still awake?" I half shrug my shoulders but I’m not even sure if he can see me that well, the night sky’s really clear at the moment and the moon is creating a thick layer of light over the camp. Levi gestures his arms slowly around him.

"Well…I am awake?"

"Yeah…I guess you are…" Oh my God Mikasa, never seek out someone’s company if you have nothing interesting to say.

I look like a complete idiot...

"D-do you… want any company?" Fuck it; it’s the end of days after all. He doesn’t say anything but shrugs and tilts his head towards the space next to him, which I take as an invitation. I get up over the ladder and step onto the roof. I lay down beside him, leaving more space than perhaps necessary since he strikes me as a personal space kinda guy.

"Can’t sleep?" I’m surprised by the question and turn my head to the side to look at him, but his attentions still on the sky, his profile even more striking in this light.

"No…not really." My voice sounds small in the night air, I look back up myself -it really is beautiful.

We lay in a comfortable silence for a while...

"The sky was one of the things I missed most whilst I was in prison, two years and I didn’t see a single _fucking_ star."

Two years?

"How long did you have left…in prison I mean?" I turn my head to look at him again.

"...A lot, I wasn’t supposed to see the stars again for a _long_ time." Even though his tone stays the same, he actually seems quite sad when he says it.

"So… you must be the only guy here whose…actually kinda thankful for the apocalypse then?" I smile ‘cause it’s a ludicrous but somehow poetic thought.

"Yeah… I guess I am…" He looks at me then. "…hell of a price to pay for some _fucking_ stars though." He laughs at this which creates a swarm of butterflies in my stomach.    
He seems different when he’s by himself.

I want to make the most of it.

I want to learn everything about him that he’ll let me.

Which surprises me…but I just do.

I wanna know what Levi thinks about when he lays awake at night up here.

"What do you miss most about the world before?" We’re still facing each other but he turns away to think.

I wonder if he’s just not gonna answer me, but he seems to come to some kind of conclusion.

He sighs...

"Honestly…I just miss a good cup of tea."  

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Omg! Thank you everyone for reading and those who comment! It means the world to me and it's what keeps this story going <333


	8. Foraging For Fungi

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is mostly just humorous dialogue which covers various parts of one day. I wanted to have a quiet chapter to allow the characters to interact a bit more in camp and also so I can have a bit of time to prepare the more involved upcoming 'arcs' so to speak. The POVs jump from Levi and Mikasa a lot in this one so it's a bit different but I hope you like it.  
> Enjoy!

(Mikasa POV)

There are over ten thousand different types of mushrooms in North America and I’m supposed to know which ones will and will _not_ kill me?

"Okay, wait…how do we know if it’s poisonous or not?" Connie bends down to inspect a small cluster of fungi growing from a discarded tree branch.

"No red caps, skirts or white gills." Sasha hovers over him with her hands on her hips and he turns around to look up at her.

"A skirt?"

"Yeah like… a little mushroom flarey bit on the stem." Sasha gestures nonchalantly with her hands.

"This is _too hard_ , I don’t understand, Mikasa what do you think?" Connie points to the cluster in front of him whilst wobbling on his feet; I walk over and inspect the bright red mushrooms.

"Yeah, we can’t eat those." It doesn’t take me long to figure out they aren’t going in Nanaba’s stew.

"Why, how do you _know_!?" I’m about to point out the obvious but Sasha beats me to it, whacking Connie over the side of the head.

"No red caps remember! They look like they have frickin’ fairies livin’ in them Connie!"

"Oh yeah..." He stands back up and we walk further into the woods.

I’ve finally been given an official position in camp, second rotation of scouting teams, which means I go out on every other mission to collect supplies. Apparently my performance the other week in the hospital was up to _somebody's_  standards. However, since there aren’t any supply runs today, Connie, Sasha and I are on foraging duty – specifically mushrooms.

We were given a ten minute introduction on fungi identification and then sent on our way, all of us equally clueless without the basic prompts:

No red caps-

No skirts-

No white gills-

God imagine surviving the apocalypse only to be killed by a mushroom.

That would be unfortunate...

"How many more do we need to get do you think?" Sasha holds the basket up and I glance inside.

"Just a few more should be fine, then we need to head back so Nanaba and Linda can start cooking."

"Cool..."

Connie and Sasha are two of the easiest people to talk to in camp I’ve found. They can be a bit childish at times, which I find endearing, but they’re capable and serious when they need to be. I’ve been on two other scouting missions since the hospital and both were with Farlan and these guys.

I was worried at first that I would freak out again once I went out, and since I knew Levi wasn’t gonna be there, I didn’t know if anyone would be able to calm me down. But it was fine, turns out I just needed to get back into the swing of it. We gather the last few mushrooms we can find, all within the appropriate description, and head back to camp.

 _"Mushroom stew, here we come!_  
_Mushroom stew, yum yum yum!_  
_Mushroom stew, here we come!_  
_Mushroom stew, yum yum yum!"_

 Sasha sings the whole way back until we finally get back into the thick of camp...

"If you don’t stop singing that, I’m going to throw something very heavy… and _very_ painful at you." We all hear a bored voice say from above us and we glance up to see Levi sitting lazily on Hange’s roof.

"Sorry..." Sasha goes bright red, giggling nervously.

"Well  _I_ thought it was _very_ creative!" Connie lifts his chin up, putting his arm around Sasha as Levi lifts an eyebrow.

"I’ve heard more creative things come out your ass Springer." Connie goes quiet but Sasha’s giggling turns into full on laughter; they turn to leave, taking the basket of questionable mushrooms with them.

"You know... that wasn’t very nice…" I fold my arms across my chest. 

"Well, no one pays me to be nice Ackerman-"

"No one _pays_ you for anything…?" I put my hands on my hips and Levi suddenly lifts his in fake exasperation.

"Well then what the fuck am I still doing here!?" I laugh at him, feeling some colour come into my cheeks.

"You’re an idiot you know that?" He just looks at me, his expression not changing from his usual unimpressed stare, which makes me look away. I’ve spoken to him a bit more since the night we watched the stars but I don’t think we’re quite at the… _friends_ level yet. Does Levi even have friends? I need to change this train of thought... "Have you seen my brother?" He looks at me again, expression slipping into annoyance. Levi then yanks something up from by his side, waking up my brother, who I didn’t even notice was lying down beside him.

"He wouldn’t leave me alone all afternoon, then he fell asleep, like..." Levi shrugs. "...twenty minutes ago." Eren rubs his face and looks around until he becomes lucid enough to notice me.

"Heeeeey, Mikasa!" He has a dumb smile on his face, eyes still sleepy.

"Hey Eren, napping in the middle of the day?" I raise an eyebrow, crossing my arms. "You finish all those jobs Ravi and I gave you to do?" Eren looks away at my question, trying to look innocent. "Eren!?"

"I was gonna finish them later! Okay!?"

"Eren you’ve had _all_ day, you said you wanted to be helpful and when I give you something to do you avoid it like the plague…!"

"Yeah, well…" He looks desperately to Levi for some support.

"You’re on your own kid..."

He sighs...

"Fine, I’m sorry!" Eren finally admits his wrong doing and stands up. "I’ll finish them now…" He starts to leave. "…see you later Levi." He gets down from the ladder and walks away, sulking.

I sigh and close my eyes.

"You couldn’t have gotten him to do that, like, three hours ago?" I open them to glare at Levi.

"Well I _thought_ he’d be getting on with them whilst I was in the woods!"

"Come on Mikasa, the kids got the attention span of a lawn chair, of cause he got bored and distracted." True, I find it funny how Levi’s only known Eren for less than a month and already knows him that well.

"You busy?" I feel weird talking to him from down here.

"I am _always_ busy." I roll my eyes.

"Well, can I-" We suddenly hear a voice in the distance shouting.

"YO! LEVI! WALKEEEERS!" Levi stands up and turns around, looking out over the far field. He raises his arm, signalling to someone in the distance.

"What is it?" I ask and Levi turns back to look down at me.

"Ymir, there’s a couple walkers over the far side that have come out of the woods, they want me to go over and check to make sure it’s just the two." He sits down then gracefully glides off the roof, landing in front of me. "Wanna come?"

An invitation?

Such honour...

"Sure." I shrug my shoulders casually, trying desperately to ignore the fluttery twist in my stomach. We head around the back of Hange’s campervan and start walking down the hill. The field is at least a half a mile long, full of various wild flowers and Ymir waits at the bottom for us. Levi just nods to her as we walk passed.

"Have you had many walkers near camp since you set up two months ago?" I’ve decided to start calling them walkers, the same as the others in camp, rather than wanderers, what Eren and I had been calling them. Eren and I called them wanderers because we thought it made them sound more harmless, but... we know they're not. Levi doesn’t look at me but shrugs at the question.

"Not really, more and more appear to be finding their way here recently though. If there’s no food left in the cities, they’re eventually gonna make their way towards the outskirts."

"Do you think we’ll have to move our camp at some point?" The thought makes me nervous.

"Naturally, can’t stay in this field for the rest of our lives."

"Yeah, I guess so... Did you talk to Hange about the things at the hospital?" He sighs and I start to worry I'm irritating him.

"Honestly, no one has any idea what they could have been, mainly because it’s all crazy shit from here on anyway. Best answer she could come up with was some mutation in the virus or something, I don’t know. The important thing is that we know they _can_ be killed and we know _how_ we can do that – thanks to you." He glances at me.

"Hate to think what else could be out there though." We get to the far end of the field, the two walkers shuffling slowly towards us and Levi takes them out in two swift motions.

Guess I was just here for the company then...

"We’ll wander into the woods a little to make sure there aren’t any more." He starts moving on ahead, but I'm distracted by one of the bodies, one of the _people_ , lying on the ground. She’s slender with thick black hair and it isn’t hard to tell she‘d probably had a pretty face… once upon a time. She looks young, mid to late twenties and about my height.

In fact…

It was like looking into a rotting mirror...

I start to feel nauseous because it could of so easily have been me...

It could _still_ be me… soon.

"Mikasa?" Levi comes back to stand beside me; glancing down at the dead girl on the ground and back in my direction. "Come on …we have to go" He somehow sounds more tense than usual and takes my hand, gently pulling me into the woods. I finally glance away from the body and start following him. We’re quiet for a few minutes until Levi breaks the silence. "That’s not gonna be you, you know…not any time soon." 

 

 (Levi POV)  
  
…not if I can help it…

I keep hold of Mikasa’s hand so she keeps walking forwards, her attention still elsewhere. It wasn’t hard to figure out what was going through her head; it’s easy to imagine yourself as one of those things when some still look so human. We make our way around the field, staying in the woods; walking in relative silence. Mikasa trails a little bit behind so I have to look back to check on her every so often. We don’t come across any more walkers and soon find ourselves back at camp.

"Levi!!" Sigh, for fucks sake. I see Erwin striding towards me, an angry look on his face and so I let go of Mikasa’s hand.

What the hell have I done wrong _now_ Eyebrows?

"Yes?"

"What have I said about being discreet when it comes to the walkers, you can’t just have Ymir announce it at the top of her lungs, you’ll get people in a panic!" He stands over me, any opportunity to remind me of our height difference.

You bastard...

Breath Levi… just breath...

"I’m sorry Erwin…" I cross my arms, looking up at him. "…I didn’t realise the zombies were a secret." I say it slowly with no expression, which makes him sigh.

"It’s not funny Levi, I’m trying to keep a good fifty people in a calm and civilised environment and you have a habit of not helping with that!"

"Like I said, I’m sorry! Next time… I’ll talk to the walkers, make sure they understand the sensitively of the situation and pass the message on..." I can see Erwin about to reprimand me more so I amend my sarcasm. "Look Erwin, you can’t wrap these people up in cotton wool forever, they need to know when dangerous things are nearby so they can be more prepared for when shit hits the fan-"

"These people are just civilians Levi, _not_ fighters, _not_ killers. I know the type of people you use to band together and this is _not_ like that!"

"Jesus Christ Erwin, I just think these people should know how to _defend_ themselves, I don’t want to turn them into a _fucking_ mafia organisation!" 

"And since when did you give a _shit_ about other people’s lives Levi?!" He steps closer to me and points a finger into my chest; I clench my fists, trying _really_ hard not to break his jaw. "You’ve ruined enough lives in your time, people have relied on you in the past and that didn’t work out so well, did it-?"

"You bastard-!"

"-those people were innocent-"

"Those _people_ were my _family_ …!" I shove his hand away and take a step forward, but check myself at the last minute… because I know people will be watching. There are _always_ people watching, waiting for the ex con to fuck up. Erwin lifts his hand again, poking my shoulder.

"You just get on with the jobs _I_ give you and leave _me_ to take care of the people, remember your place, got it?"

"... Got it..." I clip the words out and they leave a sour taste in my mouth. He steps back then and turns to Mikasa, as if only just realising she stood behind me. A charming smile replaces the recent scowl on his face and I have to look down, fists still clenched. He starts talking to her as if the encounter between us never happened.

"Mikasa, it’s nice to see you settling in so well, we’re very lucky to have you and your brother with us."

I don’t want him to talk to her...

I don’t want him to turn anyone else against me...

Few people can resist the charm of Erwin Smith, the smug son of a bitch. Mikasa smiles back at him, a plastered smile, that I notice, doesn’t reach her eyes.

"Well, thank you, I mean, my brother and I would never have made it here if it hadn’t been for Levi, so…" She glances at me. "…lucky for us he _gave a shit_ , right?" She smiles again but this time there’s a glint in her eyes, daring Erwin to backtrack on his previous comments.

But the man just smiles, nods his head and starts to walk away...

I relax my shoulders and close my eyes.

"Does he have to be such as _asshole_ about it?" Mikasa says it quietly as if she’s afraid Erwin might still hear her and I open my eyes again.

"The guy still thinks he wears a _fucking_ uniform… and thinks _I’m_ still in cuffs and an orange jumpsuit." I sigh...

I need to walk away before I take my frustration out on someone who doesn’t deserve it, someone who still thinks I’m a good person....Someone like Mikasa Ackerman. I don’t bother turning around and head towards the others side of camp, leaving her behind.

 

 

(Mikasa POV)  


"Guess I’ll see you later then…" I say it lamely to myself as I watch Levi walk away. I may not be a people person, but I know when someone needs to be left alone. I didn’t understand most of what they were talking about, but I imagine it had something to do with why Levi was in prison…and why he keeps his distance from people. It was weird watching Erwin tell Levi what to do. Some people just give off this sense of authority, like they only ever _give_ orders, and Levi struck me as one of those people. It’s clear to me that he wasn’t put on this planet to serve underneath anybody else and it was also clear to me, that he gave _more_ shits than most people I’d met _prior_ to the end.

I sigh...

Well what the hell do I do now?

I walk over towards the fire pit and notice a group of people sorting out the various bits for dinner. As I get closer I can see Nanaba, Linda, Naomi and a couple other women I had actively tried to avoid. I walk passed quietly, trying hard not to be noticed…but that failed miserably.

"Mikasa! Honey, do you think you could lend us a hand?" I turn towards the women and notice Nanaba waving a hand at me. I could lie, tell them I have stuff to do, prior engagements- but we all know that’s not true in the slightest. Heck- I’m bored.

"Sure, I guess." I walk over to them and sit on the only free log stool around the produce: mushrooms, potatoes, salads and carrots. Nanaba passes me a large hand full of mushrooms and a clean knife.

"Now, just chop them up as small as you can then pop them in the pot in the middle of the circle, okay?" I like Nanaba; she was kind and had this overwhelming need to include everybody in everything. It wasn’t a secret that I had a rough relationship with some of the other women in camp but Nanaba was the type of person to ignore this and _insist_ everything will work out.

 _'You’ll be best of friends before you know it, just give it time.'_ You’re optimistic Nanaba, I’ll give you that. I begin cutting up the mushrooms when I notice the other three women opposite looking in my direction.

" _What!?"_ I honestly didn’t mean to snap but their faces just brought out that side of me. 

"Nothing..." The woman with red hair says to me, I think her name is… Karen? "You just look very tired is all, your hair's probably seen better days."

Just ignore them Mikasa...

You are better than this...

"Come now ladies, I want this produce chopped and boiling by the end of the hour." Nanaba glares subtly at the other women and they get back to work. There’s an awkward silence for a good five minutes before Karen pipes up again.

"So! We’ve got all the gals here, might as well have some lovely lady chat." Oh my God, please no. "Of all the men in camp, who’s caught _your_ eye Nanaba?"

"Please Karen, what are you, twelve? It’s hardly the time for this." Naomi looks at her with a disapproving expression.

"What, we’ve got quite the collection and I know for a fact Nana here’s been glancing in Mr Zacharias’ direction for a while now."

"Karen!"

"Look, it’s just innocent gossip, no harm no fowl." She raises her arms in defence. "I myself would love a round or two with Erwin if he had the time." This makes the other women giggle and I try to focus really hard on the mushrooms in my hand.

"Aren’t you married?" All of the eyes fall onto me and I shrug, frowning. "What?" I was never a girly girl and this kind of chat went over my head but I’m pretty sure she was, so…

"Mikasa, sweetheart, when you’ve been married for as long as I have, it’s important to learn to appreciate the finer things that come around." Karen looks at me and uses a condescending tone. "Things can get a bit… bland at home if you know what I mean." Oh... "Besides, _most_ of the women here still have partners in camp; it’s just a little fun, like take Naomi for example." My ears perk up at the mention of Miss Perfect. "She’ll blabber on for _days_ about her perfect little family but given the chance she’d jump _Levi’s_ bones _any day_ …"

"Karen!!" Naomi’s voice squeaks and she smacks Karen on the arm, looking at her like she couldn’t believe what she was hearing.

Heck, _I_ couldn’t believe what I was hearing...

"What, you take up _every_ chance to insult the guy and when you don’t think anyone’s looking you stare at him like you wanna-"

"Shut up Karen!" Naomi’s gone bright red, pretty much confirming the accusation when she doesn’t deny it.

"Hell honey, I’m not disputing you for it, if the guy smiled a bit more and didn’t give off such cautionary vibes, I’d be right in there." I desperately want to leave, but I don’t want to draw any attention to myself. "I mean, every girl wants a bad boy at the end of the day, don’t they… Linda agrees…"

"That’s different, Linda’s just grateful to Levi." Nanaba points out. "He helped her with her husband, that’s all."

"Whatever." I look over to Naomi, who’s still blushing profusely and she glances up at me. I quickly look away, pretending I was suddenly very interested in the trees. Karen continues talking. "The guy’s a mystery and it’s only natural for us ladies to find that quite alluring…is all I’m saying." She shrugs. "Plus, his pretty face helps."

Maybe if I stick this knife in my eye, the conversation will end…

"Mikasa…" Shit. "You spend a bit of time with the guy, anything to share…we’re all friends here after all." We are? Okay sure, and I’m gonna sleep on a proper mattress tonight.

"Um…" All eyes were on me again and I’ve never wanted to disappear into the ground more than I did now. "I-"

"Ladies!" Jean’s voice interrupts my scrambled thoughts, thank- you- Jesus. We all turn to look at him. "Sorry to interrupt your little… thing, but I need to borrow Mikasa if that’s okay?"

Hell yes! That is _so- very- okay_.

I drop the knife onto a plate and stand to leave but I figure I should probably say something…

"Um…sorry ladies…" Yeah that’ll do, let’s get out of here. Jean and I start walking towards the far end of camp and; come to think of it, I have no idea where we’re going. I turn to glance at him. "What did you need me for anyway?" He just laughs.

And now I’m slightly concerned...

"Jean…?"

"Nothing really, you just…look like you needed rescuing." He smiles gingerly and blushes.

Oh...

"Um, well, thanks… actually you have no idea how much I appreciated that." I laugh as well and his shoulders seem to relax, as if he wasn’t sure he’d done the right thing.

"Good…um, well I was on my way to meet Sasha and Connie so… you can come with, if you want?"

Yeah why not...

"Yeah, sure, why not."

We head off towards the far field when Furlan comes running out of the woods.

"Mikasa! Mikasa! Awesome, you’re here, yes, you need to come with me!"

"Why, what happened?" He doubles over for a second to catch his breath.

"It’s… your brother, he’s-"

"What! Is Eren okay!?" I step up closer to Furlan, grabbing his arms.

"Yes, yeah, Mikasa he’s fine…he just got himself into a bit of a…predicament…"

 

(Levi POV)  


"And why the fuck did you climb the tree again?" I look up at the massive maple tree to see Eren clinging to the far right branch, his limps encircling rough bark.

"I just wanted to know how far I could see, that way… I could help keep watch with you from really high up." He says it with confidence but wobbles towards the end when the wind picks up.

"And how far can you see!?" Connie asks from next to me.

"Umm…" Eren tries to lift his head up to look over the canopy but panics and shoves his cheek back against the tree. I whack Connie round the side of the head and Sasha steps forward to try calm the kid down.

"You’ll be fine Eren; Furlan’s gone to get your sister…"

"I…I just w-wanna get d-down…" The kid starts crying and you can tell he’s building up the entire situation in his head. I turn around to see if Furlan had any luck finding Mikasa. "No! Don’t go! L-Levi…Please don’t go!!"

Sigh, I turn back around to look back up at Eren.

"I’m not going anywhere Eren-"

" _Promise?!"_

"Promise..." He calms down momentarily and I can hear people coming up from behind us.

"Eren!" Mikasa appears beside me, looking up at her brother. "What the _hell_ Eren, why are you stuck up a tree, how did you even get up there?!"

"M-Mikasa…!" She just sighs, trying to collect her thoughts, then looks at me. Her face takes on a weird expression and she looks away quickly, as if remembering something. "Can you guys get me down noooooow!?"

"Yes Eren, just…give us a minute, okay...?" I turn to Mikasa and Furlan. "Either he jumps, or someone has to go up there and get him."

"I’ll go!" Connie pokes his head round the other side of the tree, raising his hand.

"No."

"Why?"

"Because you’ll just get stuck as well and become an even bigger problem., then we'll just end up with two idiots up a tree."

"No, I won’t…" I just glare at him because we don’t have time for this as Eren gets more and more unsettled. "Okay, maybe you’re right…"   
  
Mikasa glances up at her brother again and appears to put a plan together in her mind.

"Um, okay, I’ll climb up the tree and help Eren manoeuvre himself back down, it looks a bit dodgy and since I’m light it’ll be safer… then I’ll just climb back down myself." She looks at me and I shrug.

"Okay, sounds like a plan." We all stand back whilst Mikasa begins to climb up the massive tree with the grace and agility of a feline. Within no time at all she reaches Eren’s branch and slowly loosens the kid’s tight grip around the bark. It’s hard to make out what she’s saying from down here, but it looks like she’s trying to calm him down. They both seem to come to some understanding and Mikasa gradually gets Eren from one branch to another, never faulting in her step, like she does this shit every day. Eventually they get to a point where Eren’s too short to comfortably step down to the next stable branch and he begins to panic.

"No nononono, I c-can’t do it, it’s too far…!"

"Okay Eren, calm down, you’ll just have to jump the rest of the way, it’s not that far, Levi will catch you!?"

"No no no no no, I don’t, I can’t…" Mikasa’s grip on the upper branch becomes wobbly since she’s also currently supporting Eren’s weight as well. If they’re not careful they’ll both fall and from where Mikasa is she’ll definitely break something.

"Eren! Eren, I need to you to let go of your sister’s hand so I can catch you… Eren!?"

"W-what if you drop me?!" I glance at Mikasa again and it’s easy to tell she’s struggling.

"Eren, I swear I won’t drop you-"

"But-"

"Eren! Do you trust me...? Eren?!"

"Y-yes!"

"Then let me catch you, okay?"

...

"Okay..."

Eren quickly lets go of Mikasa’s hand, eyes still closed, and lands in my arms. I set him down on the ground quickly and bend down to lift up his chin.

"Eren, you’re safe now, you can open up your eyes." The kid gingerly lifts one eye open to look at me.

"I’m not dead?"

"No, Eren, you’re not dead…" He sighs and smiles at me like he hadn't been freaking out a second ago.

"Cool, thanks Levi."

"You’re a stupid kid you know that?" I stand back up and ruffle Eren’s hair, glancing at Mikasa still descending the tree.

 

(Mikasa POV)

I fucking hate trees…well, I hate being up trees. I managed to get Eren down with little trouble but now I don’t know how to finish getting down myself. I twist my head around to glance at the distance bellow me, okay, so – I don’t _think_ I’d break my legs if I jumped now?

Damn it!

I lean my forehead onto the branch above me and sigh when I hear Levi’s voice from bellow.

"You need any help?" He sounds kinda smug, which irritates me more than it should have. I turn my head again to bite back.

"No!" He raises his hands and walks back to the others. My stomach does a summersault drop and I have to force my forehead back against the tree, closing my eyes. "Wait...! Wait! Yes…yes _please_." It was really hard to ask for help but my mind was beginning to scramble. I didn’t think he’d heard me but then his voice becomes clearer as he walks closer to the tree.

"You let go…I’ll catch you." His voice still sounds bored by the whole situation which throws me off a bit.

"Isn’t there an easier way then me just… free falling?"

"No Mikasa, there isn’t."

"UUuuugggh!" I scrunch my eyes shut again and sigh.

"Eren managed it…" I can hear another person come closer to the tree and start talking to Levi. "If you’d be more comfortable, Jean seems happy to try catch you?" He sounds amused by the concept which irritates me further.

Try?

"Just… I swear to god Levi if you drop me I’ll kill you!" I turn my head again and glance down to see his smug smile.

"Honestly, I can think of worse ways to go."

Asshole...

I let go of the branch and land bridal style in his arms. I let out the breath I had been holding and relax, but… then I remember where I am and immediately tense back up.

"Now put me down!" He laughs but places me back down with the up most of care, onto my own two feet.

"See, wasn’t so bad was it?" I just glare at him and look over to the others. Jean seems to be staring at us with a funny look on his face whilst the rest begin sorting themselves out, ready to head back to camp. I ignore this and walk over to Eren, making him look me straight in the eyes. 

"No-more-climbing-trees! Got it?"

"Yes maam!" Eren tenses up and begins to blush when I release his shoulders.

"Good..."

 

-Two hours later-

Everyone is gathered around various areas near the fire pit once dinner was ready, how Nanaba and Linda managed to make so much food out of what we foraged is beyond me, but it tastes good. I’m sat with Furlan as he explains the plans for tomorrows supply run.

"It’s a town a bit further out but we think it might have a few more useful supplies since it’s supposed to be a pretty up market area…well, it was anyway."

"Okay, is it _a lot_ further?"

"Maybe an extra hour onto the usual drive but not too bad."

"Do you know whose coming?"

"You, me… Connie and Sasha, maybe Jean." Okay.

"What _kind_ of _useful supplies_ are we talking?" Furlan shrugs and takes a sip of his stew.

"I dunno, just stuff we haven’t managed to salvage other places yet, food and stuff we haven’t come across… why?"

"No reason, just curious..."

"You looking for something specific?"

"No… maybe something nice for Eren…" We both sit there in silence eating our stew, listening to the conversations around us. Naomi hasn’t looked me in the eye since earlier and Eren’s been pretty quiet.

It’s been a really weird day.

"Actually…" Furlan turns to look at me, eyebrows raised in question. "Do you think we’d be able to find any...tea…there?" I try to avoid looking him in the eye.

"Ummm, yeah, I guess there’s a good chance… why?"

"Just…fancied some tea is all."

Just wanna find my friend some tea…

Because that’s what friends do, right?

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks again everyone for reading!!! I really enjoy writing this story and when I hear from you and your excitement to read more it makes me so happy <333 Hope you enjoyed the new chapter!


	9. Quick Caffeine Fix

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Supply run around the shopping village and Hange and Mikasa have some lovely bonding time, on their way to becoming the best of friends....maybe

(Mikasa POV)

Bright and early in the morning and I’m busy getting ready for the day’s supply run. I look down at Eren whose still sound asleep on his side of the tent – I should probably try finding something fun for him whilst I’m out.

"Yo, Mikasa?" Furlan pokes his head through the front flaps of the tent and smiles. "Cool, you’re getting ready, just needed to fill you in on some changes to today’s trip."

"What is it?" I stop what I’m doing to look at him.

"We were discussing it last night with Erwin and since it’s a new, bigger place, Hange is gonna come in case there’s another… hospital incident. She wants to be able to study any creatures that show up…"

"Oh, okay…"

"So that means we’ll be taking two vehicles, since Hange is coming, Erwin wants Levi to come to keep an eye on her. Hange isn’t so great with… her surroundings and such, you know. Cool? Oh and we don’t know how long the trip will be now so… take a few bits in case it goes over a couple days." He smiles again and leaves the tent. Okay so, probably the biggest group I’ve ever gone on a supply run with, Me, Connie, Sasha, Jean, Furlan, Levi and Hange – should be fun. I pick up a sweater and shove it in my bag in case I have to sleep outside tonight - in the middle of a frickin’ shopping village. I kick Eren’s side lightly to wake him up.

"Oi, Eren…" His blurry eyes open and glance up at me.

"No Mikasa, I don’t wanna go school today…" Sigh, seriously?

"Eren, I’m going on the supply run in about twenty minutes, it might be a bit longer than originally planned so…"

"Mmmkay…" Eren’s eyes fall shut again.

"And so if you need anything go find Krista’s parents or someone, okay…?"

"What about Levi?"

"Well Levi’s coming on the supply run now so-"

"What!?" Eren actually sits up for this, kid doesn’t seem to care that _I’m_ not gonna be here.

"Just… be good okay, don’t do anything stupid whilst we’re away – NO, climbing trees… got it?"

"Okay…stay safe." He smiles at me then and lays back down. I leave the tent with my bag and head towards the camp exit where the vehicles are parked up the hill. As I get closer I can see everyone else already there, Connie and Sasha fighting over, what I assume is breakfast, and Hange spouting something to Levi whilst he nods with his eyes closed – no doubt attention elsewhere. I walk up to everyone and Jean turns to greet me first, which seems to be a reoccurring habit.

"Hey Mikasa, got quite a big group this time so should be a pretty cool trip." Jean points his thumb over his shoulder, gesturing to the others.

"Holy Jesus balls Hange, I can’t listen to your _shitty_ theories anymore…" Levi walks passed us towards the back of the truck with Hange close on his heels.

"I’m just saying Levi; it could be detrimental to our survival."

"I… _highly_ doubt that four eyes, but I’ll tell you what…" Levi turns around abruptly, raising his hands. "…if we do come across a hoard of zombie rats, you can say I told you so." He rolls his eyes then and continues packing.

"Zombie rats huh?" Furlan stands next to me, taking in the scene in front of us and smiles. "New theory Hange?"

"Don’t encourage her Furl-"

"YES! It goes back to an original case of global viral outbreak – the plague, better known as the black death, rats playing an integral role in…"

"Hange… just… shut up." Levi gives her a stern look and Hange just looks guilty – Levi appearing to be the only person with the ability to get her to actually stop talking.

"To be fair, zombie rats aren't probably all that too far-fetched." I say it quietly but I see Hange about to burst again.

" _Ackerman_ , what did I just say about encouraging the woman." Levi glares at me but there’s no malice in it.

"To not…"

"Well done, now can we please just… go?" Furlan claps his hands together, getting everyone's attention.

"Sounds like a plan - Levi, did you wanna allocate any instructions before we go?"

"No…it’s your supply run…"

"But you _always_ lead when you come."

"Well… I’m not even supposed to be _on_ this trip, I’m only here because fucking four eyes over here wants to pet some mutant zamboes… it’s supposed to be my day off."

"Soz Leviiii!" Hange wraps an arm around Levi’s shoulder but it’s swiftly swatted away.

"I know you’re more than capable of leading a mission Furlan…" Levi shrugs. "…so do it." He walks passed Furlan, leaving the younger blond smiling, clearly Levi’s gesture of entrusting leadership to him meaning more than we would know.

"Okay, well, Connie, Sasha, Mikasa and Jean come with me in the truck. Levi and Hange will follow us from behind."

 

After a two and a half hour drive we arrive at a massive parking lot, I look out the window to see a sign that read ‘LA ROCA SHOPPING VILLAGE’.

"So why here?" I lean forward to ask Furlan.

"A couple who arrived at camp not too long ago mentioned that they drove passed it and it seemed pretty untouched." Furlan parks as close to the entrance as possible and we get out. Various vehicles are scattered around the lot and a few walkers weave in and out of them, slowly making their way towards us.

"They shouldn’t be a problem; we’ll probably be inside once they reach us but just in case, any walkers need to be taken out with knives, not guns. Since it’s quite a large open area, guns will risk attracting way too much attention." Furlan goes through everyone, making sure they are equipped enough, ready for splitting up. Levi and Hange finally emerge from their own truck, bickering over something that’s clearly been going on for most of the journey.

"...I’m just saying Levi, everyone needs to open up a little, and it’s not healthy for…Oh, hey this place is huuuuuuge!" Hange glances around the entrance like a small child, whilst Levi tries to put distance between them as quick as possible. He stands next to me and closes his eyes for a moment; almost as if he thinks he might open them up to find himself somewhere else.

"Fun drive?" He looks over at me, total deadpan expression saying everything.

"Riveting..."

"Good, because it’s gonna be a loooong couple days." I laugh and Levi’s expression turns to one of pain. Furlan steps to the front of the group, the sound of groaning in the distance getting gradually louder.

"Right, I want everyone to get into pairs, that’ll be who you walk around with for the majority of the run."

"I’ll go with Mikasa!" Jean steps forward, raising his hand but quickly begins to blush as he begins to realise the attention he’s drawn on himself. He steps back and Connie pats him slowly on the shoulder.

"Smooth Jean, real smooth." Everyone swiftly moves to stand next to their partner. Connie and Sasha are obviously together, Jean moves to stand next to me and Hange moves to stand beside Levi. Neither Levi nor I move from our spots beside each other. I kind of figured I’d be with Jean anyway – don’t know why he had to make such a thing out of it.

"Cool, now we’re gonna start on an average supply run, we’ll walk as a group to start until we find a suitable rendezvous for us to use, then we’ll split up. Top of the list is always food and medic supplies..." I hear Hange lean in to whisper something to Levi whilst Furlan continues to explain the day’s plan.

"Do you think they’ll have any book stores?"

"Probably..." Levi doesn’t bother looking at her when he answers, sounding as bored as ever.

"Can we go to it?"

He sighs...

"I guess so."

"Is there anywhere _you_ wanna go?"

"No."

"Do you _wanna_ go to the book store?"

"I really don’t care Hange."

"I don’t wanna _make_ you go if don’t _wanna_."

" _Hange_ …"

"Okay." Her attention goes back to Furlan and I glance up to see her smiling. I’m actually surprised with how patient Levi is with her, I get the impression if it was anyone else they would be face down on the ground around about now. I kinda get the feeling Levi secretly enjoys Hange’s company. That makes me smile, because I couldn’t think of a weirder pair of friends.

We start walking inside and it doesn’t take long to take in the quiet and empty atmosphere. The odd walker staggers from shop to shop and rubbish litters the ground, but apart from that, the place is still pretty intact. Furlan leads us through the centre of the high street until we reach a large open food court area. There are no walls but it has a glass roof, the tables and chairs still scattered around the wooden plank floors.

"We’ll use this as our rendezvous and depending on how long the run goes on for we’ll sleep under here tonight. It’ll be safer for a quick escape than a closed off building and obviously we’d have alternating people on watch." The shopping village is massive and I have absolutely no idea where we’d begin. I wander over to Hange and Levi whilst I wait for Jean to sort his bag out.

"Hange?" She looks up and smiles at me. "What exactly are you gonna do if you come across one of those… things?" Her face takes on a pondering expression as if running the actual scenario out in her head.

"Well, first, I’d get grumpy cat here to kill it because otherwise, you know, it’ll probably kill me for sure…" She laughs at this. "…then, I wanna study it briefly and I’ll gather a few samples for further study- when we get back to camp of course!" I nod at her and hear Levi stop what he's doing to ask.

"What will _you_ do, if you come across one?" I actually hadn’t really thought about it to be honest.

"Not sure… don’t have your crowbar this time…" I smile and joke, but my stomach begins to twist a little. Levi stares at me for a moment and puts his hand out.

"Let me see your knife." I don’t hesitate, taking it out of my belt to give to him. It’s not a great knife, I’ve had it since the first week Eren and I went on the run. Levi looks at it briefly before turning around to get something out of his bag. I look up at Hange whilst we wait and she just gives me a massive smile.

I like Hange...

Levi turns back around with a larger and sturdier knife in his hand, it looked very nice.

"Take this one instead, it’s sharper and it’ll be a lot more efficient if you need to take out one of those other creatures. You wouldn’t have to rely on precision as much, especially if you’re in a hurry." I take the knife out of his hand and I immediately feel the weight difference, it’s nicer to hold.

"OOoooh that’s a _nice knife_ , I remember when he found that, he was pretty chuffed Mikasa, you’re a very lucky lady!" Hange takes off her glasses and leans closer to look at the knife in my hand. I look up at Levi as he chucks my semi blunt knife onto the table, I watch it land point down, blade sticking out of the varnished wood.

"Thanks." He looks up again then down at the knife.

"She’s right though, I fucking love that knife, so if you lose it…"

"-You’ll kill me? With what, you wouldn’t have a knife?" I smile at him and tuck the knife into my belt where it sits perfectly. He smiles back and takes a step forward, talking slowly.

"For starters, I don’t need a knife to be able to kill you, not that I would want to…" His eyes travel swiftly up and down my body. "…and you think I’d give you my _only_ knife?" He raises an eyebrow.  I can feel my body getting very hot, which makes me look away and I put an annoyed expression on my face to avoid anything else slipping through. He just laughs at me and I shove him away.

"You’re such an idiot." I say it quietly when Hange smiles at us both.

"Mikasa…" Jean jogs up to stand next to me. "…you ready to go?" He adjusts his backpack on his shoulder and glances over to Levi who’s gone back to sorting out his and Hange’s equipment.

"Yeah sure...see you guys later I guess." If I was being totally honest, there’s a lot of things I’d give right now to be able to go with them. We turn to leave when Levi speaks up again.

"You make sure nothing happens to her Kirstein." We turn back around and the other two are about to leave in the other direction.

"All due respect to Jean, but I’m quite capable of taking care of myself." I cross my arms and look at Levi, whose face takes on that boyish smile I remember from the hospital.

"Yeah, I know." He turns around and gestures for Hange to follow.

Asshole...

 

(Levi POV)

"You seem to get on pretty well with Mikasa?" I glance up at Hange whose busy studying a map of the shopping village.

"And… so?" I keep my eyes forward, searching all the passing buildings for walkers. I can see Hange shrug from the corner of my eye.

"You actually _smile_ around her--"

"…"

"--You have a nice smile..."

"What’s your _point_ Hange?"

"Just an observation..." She looks up from her map to wink at me.

I roll my eyes...

"So where’re we going?" Time to change the subject.

"Well! I figured if we head up this way…" She holds the map in front of me and drags her finger along a thick yellow line. "…it should take us to a book store."

"For fuck sake Hange! We have more important shit to get than your books. Besides we can’t carry them back-"

"But Leviiiiiii, you said…"

"Fine! We’ll go and you can get _one_ book…"

"ONE!? But-"

"No Hange, that’s the deal, one book then we move on to the important stuff." She huffs her shoulders but let’s it go pretty quickly.

"Okay, I guess that’s fair." Sometimes I feel like I’m babysitting a fucking toddler. "Have you spoken to Erwin again recently… about leaving?" That was a hell of a subject change, and not necessarily one I cared for. I sigh, I discussed this topic with Hange a while ago now and it was a difficult situation.

"Yeah…"

"And?! What did he say?"

"He said that I’m selfish for even proposing the idea and that I need to start giving a shit about the camp..."

"Bullshit!!!…That’s ridiculous Levi!"

"I don’t know, maybe he’s right." Hange stops abruptly and grabs my arm, making me face her.

"No Levi! He’s not! Erwin is good at what he does but he can be an asshole. If you were even remotely as selfish as he claims, you would have left at the beginning, but you’re _still here_. And you know why?! Because you care about every-single-person in that camp!" I roll my eyes and look away. "Levi, you have just as much right as everyone else to find out whether your people are okay, whether your _family_ is okay!" We stand in silence for a moment. "Did you say to him that you’d come back?" Hange looks down at that.

I sigh again...

"I didn’t really get far enough into the conversation to cover details…"

"But if you did go looking for them, you’d come back after, right?" Hange looks up at me, a sad look in her eyes.

"Honestly Hange, I don’t know… I don’t know whether I’d even go in the first place, I don’t know whether I would find any of them and… I don’t know if I’d come back if I did." I yank my arm out of her grip. "We should keep moving."

"Do you worry about them…?"

" _Hange_ …"

"But you do though don’t you, they visited you a lot whilst you were locked up, they loved you, they _were_ your family."

"It doesn’t matter-"

"But it _does,_ Levi, if I had to predict, I’d say they’re out there right now, looking for you!" That was a possibility I’d spent most nights thinking about, whether they went to the prison and I wasn’t there…or maybe they’re all just dead.

"What if they’re all gone?" My voice is quiet, vulnerability I didn’t mean to slip through, but it was a sore subject.

"I highly doubt that Levi, considering who and what they were, plus considering who most of them followed under…" She nudges my shoulder. "…they’re probably the most capable people out there – dangerous mind you – but capable." She smiles and I just nod at her. I do appreciate Hange’s words – not that I’d ever tell her that.

"Okay… "

"Also, you were a lot more _for_ the idea a few weeks ago, don’t suppose anything’s… made you reconsider…" I’ve had enough of this conversation.

"Let’s go get your fucking book."

 

(Mikasa POV)  


"I think that if we head up this way it should take us towards the… um…" Jean puts the map up closer to his face and I believe we’ve been walking round in circles for a good thirty minutes now. "Sorry."

"It’s okay Jean, we’ll just go with what’s around us." I glance around our immediate surroundings and spot what looks like a fancy coffee shop. I grab Jeans sleeve and pull him towards it. "Let’s go in here!"  
  
" _Why_ , you need a caffeine fix or something?" I glance back at him but ignore the comment.

"Where there’s coffee there is inevitably tea…" We walk into the shop and I have to step carefully over the glass that covers the ground. I look up to see the window smashed in and a chair precariously sticking out of another.

"I’ve heard of bar brawls but… never a coffee shop brawl?" Jean ponders the outside of the building before stepping inside. I step further into the building and notice the mess that surrounds us, whatever happened here, I don’t think it was over coffee. I look upwards above the counter and notice some untouched shelves and low and behold.

Are those tea leaves I see before me?

"You know, I was never a big fan of the coffee shop scene…" Jean inspects the shop slowly, murmuring to himself. "… more of a bar person myself, there are too many different -what the hell are you doing!?" He runs up to the counter, watching me scale the massive stocked shelves. "Are you nuts, what if you fall or-"

"Just shut up Jean and keep watch, it’ll just take me a minute." I manoeuvre my feet around the various coffee pots until I can almost reach the tea leaf bags and…great.

How many bloody types of tea are there?  
  
"Just grab one and let’s get out of here!" Jean starts to sound more and more nervous.  
  
"Okay! Just, wait a minute…" I stretch my arm up but it’s still a little out of reach, I grab the lower shelf with my free hand and try again on my tiptoes.

Breakfast Tea?

Earl Grey?

Green?

Darjeeling?

Man, I am so out of my depth...

"Mikasa!?"

"Okay… jeez I’m com-" I hear the back door of the shop rattling and then the inevitable groans that follow. Okay yeah, time to go.

Earl Grey it is-

I shove the tea leaves into my jacket pocket and quickly, _but carefully_ , start to descend the shelves. Once I get to the bottom, the backdoor is swung open and two walkers start staggering over the spilt coffee beans.

"Come on Mikasa, lets just go!" I ignore Jean and step over to the walkers, taking out my new knife. The grip on the handle makes me feel in control and the weight puts confidence in my movements. I look the two walkers in the face, their features sliding off like wax.

"I’m afraid this coffee shop is currently closed for repairs but I’d be happy to point you in the direction of our nearest Starbucks..." I take the two out with a fast stab to the head, both bodies falling to the ground in a heap. I turn, pick up my bag and start out the door, feeling pretty damn well accomplished. "Come on Jean, we gotta go." He just looks at me, mouth open. "Jean?"

"I..uh, um, yeah, yeah lets go."

We start walking down the opposite walkway which is more enclosed than the previous direction. I take the tea leaves out of my jacket pocket and go to put them in my backpack.

"Wow, you must really like tea, huh?" Jean looks down at the tea going into my empty bag. 

"Hmm?" I just shrug. "Not really." His face takes on a confused expression.

"Okay, um, well anyway… where next?"

 

-Later that day-

The sun starts to set over the shopping village so Jean and I head back to the rendezvous point.

"All in all a pretty successful day I’d say." Jean lifts up his packet of M&M’s and shoves more into his mouth- I shoved a load into my bag to give to Eren later.

"Yeah, I guess it  _has_ been a good day…"

"Yeah! I’ve really enjoyed spending time with you, a-as your partner… today…working, working _with_ you…today…as your partner…"

" _Thanks…_ Jean." I smile at him to try calm him down; guy needs to work on those sentence formations. "You’re a good partner too." We start to hear murmurings in front of us when the food court comes into view, everybody else already back.  
  
"…And that’s seven!" Furlan jumps up onto one of the tables and gestures his arms open widely. "Congratulations everybody on _not_ dying, I am proud as your leader and grateful as your friend." He looks down at Levi quickly. "Too much?" Levi just shrugs.

"Eh, you do you man."

"Okay!… Cool…" Furlan steps down from the table, still smiling and comes over to find out what we managed to gather together. The evening around the village is surprisingly calm, considering we’re in a relatively unknown area. Sasha made a simple stew out of provisions and everyone began unwinding whilst the ‘on watch’ rotation began. Levi went off to patrol the area around us so I’m lying down alone on top of a bench just outside. I look up at the stars and wonder how many other people, how many other survivors, are looking up at the same stars. It’s easy to get lost and imagine the world’s a normal place when you look up long enough.

"Hellooooo, would you mind if I joined you!?" I turn my head to see Hange standing off to the side.

"Of course not…" I move over so she can climb atop the table and lay next to me. We just exist there in silence for a moment as she takes in the stars. I haven’t really spent that much time with Hange so I don’t know her very well, and thus… I have _absolutely_ no idea what to say to her. Part of me isn’t sure if I need to talk but, another knows she’s probably the closest thing Levi has to a friend in camp and that makes me want to get to know her more.

I’m about to say something when Hange takes the lead...

"I thought it might be nice if we got to know each other a little, I like you, you're different to a lot of the other women in camp… plus, Levi seems to like you and that says a lot about your tolerable nature…"

"Um…thanks?" Tolerable _was_ what I was going for after all. She laughs and I can sense her turn her head slightly to peer in my direction.

"I reckon you’re a special individual Mikasa, you’re different and this new world needs that more than ever." She looks back up at the sky. "The world has always been made up by a society of mindless zombies, endlessly consuming without need. As a race, we as human beings will take and take until there is nothing left, forever searching for this ultimate happiness which we know deep down is really unobtainable--"

Wow...

I guess there’s something about staring up at the stars which really makes people… speculate. I stay quiet and she continues talking.

"-- I’ve spent my entire life studying humans, the way they think…the way they act. The world we live in now is just a more refined version of our inherent nature. Although, in contrast to this we also have the inherent need to survive. It can be hard for some people to fight between these two, for some… they just give into that insatiable need to consume, and they are inevitably themselves, consumed by that need. The problem is our arrogance; we believe irrefutably that no matter what is thrown at us we will still succeed. Wars, nature, disease, we will fight it and thrive once again. Even when we fail, that day that, whatever it is…" She gestures up and around with her hands. "...claims us, we will still want to be around to watch the world we built up crumble, so we can leave behind a tombstone that tells whoever turns up long after we’re gone, that… we were here… we were here and we kicked ass until the end. Because of this, the world is now made up of two different types of people, the arrogant, those who still consume because they believe the end is but a new opportunity for it, and the fighters, the ones who still want to save humanity--"

I have no idea what to say to that but I guess she’s right, at least in a way.

"--You’re a fighter Mikasa." Hange looks at me and smiles. "You’re a strong one." I’m not sure what to do with her words -a lot of the time I don’t feel very strong.  "Buuuuut who knoooows, the worlds probably fucked either way, humans have been destined to eat themselves to death from the beginning, both figuratively and now… kinda literally." Hange chuckles at her own explanation and I find it hard not to agree.

"I guess you’re probably right..." I turn to look at her. "…guess you really know people, huh?" She laughs again.

"Hah! Well, I like to pretend I do, but to be completely honest… nothing confuses me more." She smiles at that. "I met a lot of different types of people whilst I worked in the prison system."

"How long _did_ you work there?" She seems to think about this.

"Not _that_ long, I was transferred to the state high security only about five months before everything happened."

"Did you work with Levi for that whole time?" She turns to look back at me and raises an eyebrow.

"Define, _work with_ … that man didn’t cooperate with anything that didn’t suit him. Don’t get me wrong as far as I was aware he didn’t really cause any trouble… in fact he probably helped keep more peace than he disturbed it. I became fascinated by him though, the court case was a big one and I followed it extensively for about eight months."

"I didn’t know it was that big of a deal?"

"Oh, hell yeah! He was a big catch, wasn’t that simple though, very –messy- trial." Talking to Hange reminded me how little I actually knew about the guy.

"How much do you actually _know_ about Levi?"

"Not much, for five months scrounging everything I could, I didn't get very far. I mean, I know all the basics from having been his psychiatrist. He was born in Nantes, France, little known about family, came to America when he was about eighteen and rose through some pretty extensive ranks very quickly and was the name on the streets by the time he was twenty-five…"

"He’s French?"

"Yeah…well, originally, although I imagine it was quite a complicated childhood…" Yeah sounds it… "ANYWAY! How about a little treat?!" Hange sits up abruptly and leans over the edge of the bench then sits back up with a brown bottle in her hand. "I found this baby in the back of a staff cupboard…" She stares at the label. "Looks _faaancy_." The way she says it makes me laugh and I take the bottle from her to read.

"Rum? Why’d you pick up _rum_ … _when_ did you…" She takes it back from me and wiggles her eyebrows.

"I snuck it in my backpack whilst Levi wasn’t looking… smart, huh?"

"You’ve displayed multiple examples of intelligence whilst sitting on this bench Hange… but I’m not sure that was one of them." She just laughs at me, twists the cap off the rum and takes a dramatic swig without breaking eye contact with me. I raise my eyebrows as she passes the bottle my way.

"I don’t think it’s a very good idea to drink, we should probably keep our wits about us… you know, because of all the flesh eating creatures."

"Come oooooon…" She takes another swig, a pretty big one. "… It’s the end of the world Mikasa; people are dying so why not _live_ a little." She laughs at her own joke. I just give her a pointed look.

"Well that was just in bad _taste…"_ I smile and Hange screeches, pointing a finger at me.

"Hahaaa _taste_!" Her face takes on a weirdly serious expression. "Because people eat people now." Then she bursts out laughing.

Yeah, the rums kicking in fast...

"Oh for God’s sake." I grab the bottle and drink some myself.

"Nooooo! Don’t do it for _God,_ what’s heverr done fur youuuu? He’s FUCKED… ALL OF US!!! Drink for youuuu MIKASA and only youuuuu."

So I do...

 

(Levi POV)  


I’m nearly back to the rendezvous point after circling the village a couple times when I hear Hange’s signature cackle. I walk around the last bend and see her sitting up right on top one of the outside benches.

What the hell is she doing?

I get closer and notice she’s not alone, lying down beside her is Mikasa, laughing equally as hard whilst covering her eyes with her arms.

Well shit...

"What the hell are you doing?" They both freak the fuck out when I make them jump, Hange the first to turn around whilst Mikasa doesn’t sit up at all.

"LEVIIIIIIII!" She opens her arms wide for a hug but I just cross my arms.

"Jesus Hange, turn it down a few fucking notches, what the h-... have you been _drinking_?" I step closer and I spot the empty bottle of rum between the two, Hange’s breath further evidence I did not need.

"Only a liiiitle Levi…" She wheezes at her own joke. "...little Levi, because you’re so smaaaaall…" Hange loses her shit at that and cackles a bit more. I peer down to glance at Mikasa as she covers her mouth with her hand, eyes closed, clearly trying very hard to suppress her own laughter. I reach forward and grab the bottle from between them, turning it upside down, I watch very little of what’s left pour onto the ground.

"I think maybe both of you need to get some sleep..." Mikasa sits up very abruptly and turns as if she’s about to say something but thinks better of it. I sigh. Hange goes to stand up from the bench and wobbles, impressively still staying up straight.

"Mikasa and I... a-are the BEST of friendsnow Levi, I am afraid you’ll needed to find a new bested..best…bestie…" She’s making about as much sense as usual... There are honestly no words. I look round to see Mikasa just staring at us both, a confused look on her face.

"Do you think you can walk?" I give her a stern expression, raising my eyebrows, the model parent. "Or are you gonna have to sleep on the _bench_ tonight?" Mikasa looks at me for a moment then sticks her tongue out.

"I…" She takes a minute to collect herself, and then proceeds to stand up. "…am fine." She opens her arms out in a celebratory gesture once she’s finally stood up straight.

"Yaaaaaaaay!" I hear Hange whisper cheer from behind me. "See she’s fi- eh oh!" Mikasa starts to topple and begins to totally crumple to the floor. I quickly jump forwards and catch her by the waist _before_ she gets a mouth full of dirt.  

"You don’t seem very fine?" I manoeuvre Mikasa’s body around until I can support her enough to keep her standing, then realise she wouldn’t make it up right so I lift her up bridal style. She almost immediately slumps once she’s in my arms, head rolling forward to lean on my chest. "Jesus Christ Hange how much did you let her drink?!"

"What makes you think it was my idea?!" I can feel Mikasa poking me on the cheek but ignore her.

"Of course it was your stupid fucking idea four eyes, you’re the only one who’s stupid enough to think getting hammered in the middle of an unprotected location is a good idea!" We’re still whispering but my voice is getting sharper.

"It was just to get her to loosen up abi-"

"Hange, for fuck…" I sigh loudly. "What’s the point in having this conversation with you anyway?" Hange looks sad now and lowers her head.

"I just wanted to get to know her and have a bit of a laugh, besides I didn’t think it would be thatst…trong… I’m really sorry Levi…" She’s gone really quiet now and I feel like I’ve just kicked a puppy.

For fucks sake...

"Mmmmfine really…" Mikasa raises her head a little to look up at me. "Are you mad?" I look down at her and sigh.

"No, Mikasa, I’m not mad. I’m just… concerned. Gonna put you to bed now, okay?" She nods her head slowly and it falls back down to my chest. Pretty sure she’s out cold now. I turn back to Hange and gesture for her to follow me to camp.

"Come on, I’ll stay up and take the next watch with Furlan since you guys won’t be very… conscious for yours."

"Sorry again…" Hange trails behind me. "We did have a good bonding session though."

"Yeah I’m sure you did." We walk over under the glass roof towards the others, some of whom have already fallen to sleep. I gently lay Mikasa down onto her sleeping bag and look up at Hange who’s lingering behind me, a worried look on her face. "Pass me one of those bottles of water." She quickly does as I ask and I place the bottle next to Mikasa’s head. I can feel Hange bend down to sit on the floor beside us.

"I _am_ really sorry…You’re right, it wasn’t a good idea and I put both mine and Mikasa’s lives in danger. If something were to happen we wouldn’t have been able to react properly." She looks up at me. "Sorry."

"Stop apologising Hange, you know you did a stupid thing so we can move on." I feel something poking me weakly in the side and look down to see Mikasa, eyes barely open.

"I didn’t know you were _French_?" I look over to Hange who looks guilty and shrugs.

"We were just talking…!" She lifts her hands up innocently. 

" _About_?"

"Just… things and such…"

"…"

"Ya came up, yeah… but only because you’re such a riveting topic of conversation. I didn’t say anything I shouldn’t have I swear!" She keeps her hands up but I just roll my eyes.

"Its fine Hange, I don’t mind." She immediately relaxes and I pick up the bottle of water, holding it up to Mikasa. "Since you’re still conscious we might as well get you to drink as many fluids as we can or you’re gonna feel like shit tomorrow. And you won’t be very useful like that." She slowly sits up and takes the bottle from me, appearing to feel a bit better once the bottle is empty. 

"I feel really stupid." She says quietly. It’s easy to see it wasn’t usual behaviour for Mikasa, I haven’t known her long but I know she isn’t stupid. I lift her chin up with my hand and look at her in the eyes.

"You’re not stupid Mikasa; Hange is the stupid one…" I glance across to the brunette. "… You’re just collateral as a result from that, trust me, there have been many in the past." Hange tries to protest but one look from me shuts her up. I release Mikasa’s chin and go to stand but she grabs my wrist, preventing me from leaving. Clearly her reflexes are more impressive than I originally thought.

"Where are you going!?" She looks up at me; a sad expression replacing her usually stoic face.

"I’ve gotta watch Furlan’s back on watch so you can sleep." I loosen her grip on my wrist but wrap my hand around hers. "Okay?"

"…Okay..." I look over the rest of the camp until I spot Jean, semi-conscious on top of his sleeping bag.

"Oi! Kirstein!" He sits up in a start and frantically looks around until his eyes land on me.

"Uh...um, yeah?"  I squeeze Mikasa’s hand again then let it go. "I need you to keep an eye on her whilst Hange and I are outside."  His eyes travel over to look at Mikasa whose lain back down, eyes closed. "Is she okay!?" He starts to get up but I hold a hand up to stop him.

"She’s fine, just… watch her and if she wakes up again make sure she drinks more water." The kid nods his head frantically.

"Okay, okay… yeah I will." I nod at him and turn around gesturing to Hange.

"Come on four eyes, you’re coming with me."

"Eh oh…"

 

-Meanwhile over the other side of the village-

(Reiner POV)  


"Shit, quick lay him down in here!!" I kick the door open and gesture for the rest to follow. Annie and Marco struggling to keep Bertholdt up right in their arms.

How the hell did this get so epically fucked up? The other three lay him down on the table in the middle of the room; a kitchen at the back of one of the village cafés. I guess it was pretty sanitary once upon a time so it’ll have to do.

I run up to the side of the table and run my hand over Bertholdt’s forehead.

"You’re gonna be okay, yeah, we…we just gotta get you stitched up…" I try to keep my voice calm whilst I talk to him but I know I’m hanging on by a thread inside. "Annie!" She looks up at me, eyes tired. "Try find some tools around here we can use!"

"He’s gonna be alright you know Reiner." Marco puts a hand on my shoulder. "He wasn’t bit by one of those things so he’ll _be_ okay." I shrug his hand off and spin round, angry, frustrated and so god damn tired.

"NO MARCO! He won’t be OKAY! Not if all his _fucking_ blood is on the outside of his _fucking_ body!" I take a deep breath. Bert and I have been with the other two for just over two weeks, it wasn’t supposed to go on this long. Since we left the prison, it was just gonna be me and him.

But it’s getting harder out here...

"FUCK!"

Annie appears next to me, face as expressionless and dead since we met two weeks ago.

"We need to stay calm and fix Bertholdt before those things catch up; we probably haven’t got that long. Maybe till morning." Marco steps back at that.

"W- what are we gonna do? There were too many to fight between just the four of us. We ne...need to get out of here, need to keep moving."

"We’re not going ANYWHERE until we’ve fixed Bert up, _then_ we’ll get the fuck out of here and far away from those whimpering assholes."

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you everyone for your continued reading, I always love reading your comments and hope you enjoyed the new chapter!! <333 Future chapters have been planned so I kinda know where this fic is going now, whoo! look at me being... semi-organised- haha


	10. Second Chances

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahhhh, took me a bit longer to write this one 'cause liiiiiife! Wasn't sure how I felt about this chapter since it went in a slightly unplanned direction but hope you enjoy it!! Thank you to everyone who's left kudos and comments, you're feedback really keeps this story going <3333

(Mikasa POV)

I wake up to a warm body pushed up against my side and as I try to open my eyes, the morning light immediately shoots daggers into my eyeballs.

And here comes the regret...

I finally manage to roll over and ease my eyes open to see Hange curled up into a rather uncomfortable looking ball beside me. I sit up leaning back on my arms and nudge her with my leg.

Nothing-

I look around the make shift camp between the fast food tables and notice Jean, Connie and Sasha still asleep. Guess it must still be quite early. Now that I’ve sat up for a few minutes my eyes have adjusted and my head only has a subtle throbbing to it. Well that could have been _so_ much worse. The events of the previous night play out in the back of my mind, somewhat blurry, but still vivid.

God, I felt like an idiot....

I look back down at Hange’s lifeless body next to me and scowl. Yes, I have learnt my lesson the hard way – never be encouraged by the four eyed psychiatrist for _her words_ are _her power_.

I slowly begin to stand up, pushing off what little protection I’d had from the cold and walk over to my bag. Extremely limited as to how I’m able to ‘freshen up’, I do what I can. I brush my hair, use some mouthwash and pick up a simple change of clothes. I take them behind one of the food counters at the back of the building, putting on some clean underwear and a fresh shirt. Sigh. And that’s as clean as I’m gonna feel.

I pick up my jacket and begin to put it on when I notice a massive tear in the fabric. Seriously!? When the hell did I do _this_ … well, probably yesterday whilst you were scaling coffee shop shelves Mikasa. Sigh. I take it off again and inspect the wounded piece of clothing, yep; it’s a goner, RIP my friend. You kept me warm in the harshest of autumn chills. Now that I was officially cold and annoyed, I head back out.

I walk around the others still sleeping, place my bag down and head out into the sun. Looking around, I wonder where Levi and Furlan are. It’s so quiet. I walk out a bit further into the village to see if I can find the closest clothing store, I needed a Jacket before my frickin’ arms went numb. Spotting one a few buildings down, I jog over and walk gingerly through the front door. My hand falls subconsciously to my knife, ready for any walkers currently browsing in the winter section.

My head was still throbbing which made me feel skittish, I just wanna get a jacket then go back to camp. Inspecting and immediately rejecting pieces of clothing, I make my way down the far end of the shop. I push hangers carrying heavy rain coats to the side when I hear a noise towards the other end of the room.

Probably nothing (said the girl who preceded to die horribly)...

I finally spot something that I think is both practical and at Ackerman standard. A thick charcoal black leather jacket, sporting plenty of pockets. Yes. Pockets are a survivalist’s best friend. Slipping the jacket on, I make my way round the other aisle and begin to head back outside.

Then I hear it again...

I get my knife out, hidden inside my belt under my shirt, and slowly turn the nearest corner which leads to a darker area of the store. When there’s nothing there I continue, slowly, my own even breathing all I can hear.

Suddenly I catch a glimpse of movement out the corner of my eye and spin around quickly, knife already moving to take down the creepy bastard....Well, that’s what would have happened. Before my knife could come into contact with flesh, my wrists were grabbed and I was pushed up against the far wall. It happened so quickly my breath caught in my throat and I can feel my hands held above my head -strong enough to keep them there but not so much that it hurt. My knife is still clutched in my hand as I slowly open my eyes and catch light grey eyes staring back at me.

"Oh my God, you scared the _crap_ out of me!!" I feel myself relax as soon as I see Levi's face, who just looks at me and slowly pans over to stare at the knife still in my hand.

"You know, when I gave you that you weren’t supposed to use it on _me_." His face is as expressionless as usual but his tone holds a hint of humour.

"Maybe _don’t_ sneak up on unsuspecting people then-!"

"Well it looked like you suspected _plenty_ ; you were ready to carve my cranium like a fucking pumpkin." I roll my eyes at him and he smiles. "How’s your head?" Levi lets go of my arms and I try composing myself with some semblance of dignity, placing my knife back into my belt.

"Not as bad as it _could_ have been, thanks for …thanks." He smiles and raises an eyebrow, turning around to walk out of the store. I jog to catch up with him and we find ourselves back outside, clouds starting to gather above our heads. We walk in a comfortable silence back to camp and I notice everyone else already sorting themselves out. Well, everyone accept Hange. Levi promptly walks over to her curled up body and kicks her lightly in the side.

"Oi, four eyes, rise and shine!" Hange responds with a groan, curling up into an even tighter ball. Levi sighs and turns to look at me, gesturing for a bottle of water sitting on the table. I pick it up and chuck it to him, pretty confident I know what’s gonna happen.

"Don’t you think that might just be a waste of water?" I fold my arms and give him my best disapproving stare.

"Um, naaa, pretty sure it’s gonna be worth it…" Watching him now, it’s almost like watching a bunch of high schoolers mess about. Levi proceeds to slowly empty the water over Hange’s head of messy hair.

"Whhhaaoaooaooo, what the f-fuck Levi!!?" She darts up, dancing around the tables, trying to shake the water off. Levi just shrugs, keeping his expression blank, but I can spot the satisfaction in his eyes.

"Should have responded more the first time then…" Hange stops dancing and moves to stand right in his face, pointing a finger into his chest.

"You… are a very mean little man." And then she stomps away. Levi turns back to me and I find it really hard not to laugh at the whole situation for Hange’s sake.

"You didn’t need to do that."

"She deserved it after last night." He moves past me and starts towards where Furlan is beginning to gather everyone else to go over the day's plans. It’s supposed to be our last day at the shopping village, so better make the most of it.

"Hange and I’ll go with you and Jean today, won’t cover as much ground but… with four of us together we can go further out and it’ll be safer."

 

After packing up our bags the four of us make our way off the main shopping high street and down one of the smaller back alleys.

"So what’s on today’s agenda boys and girls!?" Hange’s stood in front of the group, walking backwards and she catches glimpses behind her as she continues to smile.

"Farlan wants food to be today’s priority since not many people came back with any yesterday... and fucking walk properly four eyes before you trip and crack your head open…"

"Awww, Levi! I never knew you cared so much…" Levi doesn’t dignify her with a response and Hange turns around properly, waiting for the rest of us to walk in line with her. "Seriously though, I do hope that we find something exciting today, otherwise, what was the point in me coming?" Hange pouts a little.

"You’re good company…?" I pat her on the shoulder and smile.

"She doesn’t understand sarcasm Ackerman, don’t confuse her…" Levi smirks at his own comment.

"I wasn’t… ugh, shut up!" We head closer to the edge of the shopping village towards where our map noted various cafés and restaurants. The stone pathway is getting narrower so we have to walk in twos to avoid getting too close to the questionable entry ways of stores. We’re about to step into an old steak and grill restaurant when Levi stops in the entryway.

"What is it?" I stop as well, looking at Levi’s face to see if I can figure out what’s wrong, but alas, his expression tells me nothing. "Did you hear something…?"

"People talking…?" I strain my own ears to see if I can hear what he can… but there’s nothing. Hange and Jean stop to walk back to us, Jean’s face taking on a hint of concern.

"It’s probably nothing, just… the wind?"

"The wind? Jean, really?" Levi raises his eyebrows.

"Yeah, well… that’s what they always say in the movies…" Hange laughs at that.

"Yeah, they also say, 'let’s split up' and 'what’s the worst that could happen'… you gonna use those too." Jean blushes at Levi’s response.

"No! Just-"

"Everyone just shut up, we’ll keep moving regardless." I gesture to get the two to stop arguing and push to go back into the building, the rest following behind me.

"Whooo, Mikasaaaa…" Hange clicks her fingers in a horizontal gesture. "…takin’ charge and tolerating no _shit_ from _nobody_!" I roll my eyes at her.

 

We make our way through various food chains, foraging for any canned or long haul packed goods. Jean and Levi split, heading upstairs to check out the first floor of the café restaurant, whilst Hange and I open and close all the draws behind the main counter.

"Whoa, Vodkaaaa…"

"Hange! No more alcohol!" I had definitely learnt my lesson in that regard.

"Not for _drinking,_ I’m thinking…" Hange looks up with a thoughtful expression. "…molotovs!" I just look at her with an incredulous expression.

"… I… don’t think that’s a very good idea-"

"Well I’d let someone with better aim actually _throw_ them…"

…

…

"…Let’s just… put some of these last few bits in your bag and we’ll come back to the molotov thing… okay?" Hange sighs but agrees, and we walk back around the front.

"Well, well, well, what have we got here?" Hange and I spin around at the sound of a deep voice coming from the back of the room. A heavy built man with blond hair steps out from the kitchen door and walks slowly towards us, his gun raised, ready to shoot if we moved. "Pretty little things like you out here on your own? Doesn’t seem like a very good idea…" Hange and I both raise our hands, showing the larger man we wouldn’t try anything. One glance at the guy is easy to tell he’s bad news, his nose broken beyond ever being straight again and dark tattoos lining his upper arms, of which were built like frickin’ tree trunks.

"We don’t want any trou-"

"SHUT UP!" Hange flinches when the man shouts at her, his gun raising a little higher, now aiming at our heads. "Just put your shit down, weapons too, and turn around…" His voice becomes quieter but I can tell he has every intention of shooting if we didn’t comply; the guy has a pretty unstable look in his eyes.

What a _shit_ situation, and yeah...

I'm scared...

I can hear my heart beat in my ears and I close my eyes, taking in a deep breath to keep my hands from shaking. Images of Eren flash through my head and I am… _so_ scared to leave him behind. As Hange and I slowly slide our packs off our backs someone else storms out of the kitchen.

"What the hell Reiner, you’re supposed…!" The blonde woman immediately stops and points her own gun at us when she looks past her larger friend. ‘Who the hell are you?’

"Get back in the Kitchen Annie! I can _fucking_ handle the two scrawny bitches…" The two start bickering at each other, hissing in the other person’s direction. I take this opportunity to check up on Hange, brushing my hand against hers in the air since we had to raise them again.

"Hey… Hange, it’s gonna be okay, yeah…?" Her face has gone pale and I can see her own hands shaking slightly above her shoulders. It’s weird to see Hange like this since she’s always so up-beat and confident. I suppose she may not have had to deal with people like this yet… especially if she’s had Levi beside her since the beginning. "…I promise." I whisper it, knowing she heard me since her head nods ever so slightly in my direction.

"Stop FUCKING TALKING!" It didn’t take much to realise he was addressing us once again. "WEAPONS…DOWN!" Hange and I both begin to take our knives out of our belts when a high pitched squeal comes from behind the guy. Looking up, I catch the glimpse of Levi’s gun lined up with the assholes temple, the guy's blonde female friend lying semi-unconscious on the floor behind him.

"I’d lower that gun if I were you or I’m gonna shove it so far up your ass, you’ll be shitting bullets for the rest of the fucking apocalypse…" Levi’s voice is low, tone sending shivers down my own spine, even though I know his words weren’t directed towards me. I haven’t seen him like this before and it was kinda hard to recognise him as the same guy who smiled at me with that boyish grin…really hard.

Suppose I still don’t know the guy in front of me much _at all…_

Reiner’s eyes widen as he lowers his gun slightly, although he’ll still hit us if he decided to shoot.

"Well… _shit…_ course you _fucking_ got out…" The blond's grinning now, even though Levi’s gun still points to his temple and his tone almost sounds… like he _knows_ Levi…? "Gonna take more than the fucking APOCALYPSE to take the _great Rivaille down_ , RIGHT?!" Levi’s stoic expression cracks for the quickest second at what Reiner says, but immediately resets. I turn to glance at Hange whose own eyes have widened slightly at Reiner’s statement.

"Put. The. Fucking. Gun. Down…"

" _Why_ , you just gonna kill me… one more dead body won’t make a DIFFERENCE really _will it_!? Suppose you don’t recognise me though, Rivaille looks down on us low lives ‘cause we’re all just pawns to him RIGHT, YOU BASTARD?!" The larger man’s breathing has become quite erratic, but it’s hard to tell whether it’s out of fear or exhilaration by this point. "…Bet I can still take one of the _bitches_ out before you can pull the trigger… I’m thinking the Asian chick, bet she’ll make a fine piece of walker ass… uggghhsgd…" Quicker than my eyes could process, Levi whacks Reiner across the face with his gun, yanking the guys own weapon out from his grasp and knocks the larger man’s feet out from under him. He looks down at the blond, the guy still trying to process what had just happened – much like the rest of us.

Levi kicks him in the face and I watch the blood splatter across the café floor, Levi then bends down to leer over Reiner, yanking his head up by his hair and shoves the end of his gun past the blonde’s teeth. By this point Hange finds her own voice and chimes in…

"Levi!...I th-think he’s from the prison…!" He looks up at that, glancing towards Hange and me for the first time since he showed up. Part of me is worried what I’ll see in his eyes, but he just looks… like _our_ Levi…

 

(Levi POV)  


"I know who he fucking _is_ Hange…" Now that the immediate threat on Mikasa and Hange is gone I relax a little, reverting back to my usual bored tone. I was worried when I looked up at them, worried what I’d see on Mikasa’s face. Reiner tries to talk around the gun but doesn’t produce any tangible words. " _Shut up_ … you’ve had bigger in there _I’m sure_ …" I remove the gun from inside his mouth and glance at my now soiled weapon. Gross. "Speaking of which… I didn’t recognise you without Hoover in your shadow…not dead I hope…"

"You SON OF A BIT-Uggh..." I yank his hair back again.

"…Then I figured, he’s probably the body slowly bleeding to death in the kitchen behind us, so… that was reassuring." I smile at him but it’s just a mocking gesture. I want to hurt him more, I want to make him think I killed his friend and now I’ll kill him…but I don’t.

"If y-you… _so much_ as fucking… _touch him_ …"

"Not really in the position to be making threats but… I admire your balls Braun…" The larger man seems quite surprised when I use his last name, yeah, see I told you I know who you _fucking are_. "You see, I remember… all the men who work for pieces of shit like Nile Dok, so _I know_ when I see them, to pull out their _fucking_ teeth and chop off their _dicks_ to place in my liquor cabinet." Reiner shrinks back at my words. "So yes, _Reiner,_ I know who you are."

"Where’s Jean?!" I look up at Mikasa who glances away as soon as I catch her eye.

"He’s in the kitchen; keeping an eye on the freckled kid tending to Hoover’s wounds…he’s fine." She seems satisfied with my answer and doesn’t say anything else… and doesn’t look at me again. I ignore the pang of whatever- the- fuck _that_ caused to run through my body and focus on the blonde below me. "What are the chances you’d be willing to cooperate Braun, clearly you and your small group of survivors are walking on thin ice. You’re tired, low on food and Berthold’s got what… two days left before infection takes?" I let go of Reiner’s hair and watch his face change to one of resignation. "You could continue to fight me and eventually get a bullet through your head, or… you can shut the fuck up… apologise, and Hange over there can help patch up your lover boy before we take him back to camp so the nice doctor can save his life?"

My question hangs in the air, when I saw the blond pointing a gun at Mikasa and Hange, I wanted to kill him… I still do, but it’s better to make use of people who have the potential to make your group stronger.

"Y-you’ll help him…?" I just nod, waiting for a proper answer. "You know… I tried to join the S Legion once… but you said I w-was… too brutish and impulsive."

"Well I can’t imagine why I’d say that…" Reiner cracks a smile at my response, hearing my sarcasm and clearly seeing the irony of his own statement given his recent actions.

"I didn’t know where to go from there, that’s how I ended up in Dok’s crew… The _bastard_ treated us like _sewer rats."_ He looks up at me. "You killed a lot of my friends whilst I worked in those circles…"

"I apologise… I’m sure they were all _very_ good men deep… _deep_ down…" The sarcasm is still thick in my reply. Reiner seems to pick up on this and smiles again.

"There was no honour in Dok’s men, you were doing the world a favour..."

"See, that’s what I told the jury in court, but apparently it wasn't a very good defence." Reiner actually laughs at this, a booming sound that vibrates through the café. Despite the laughter, tears gather in the corner of the blonde’s eyes. He then seems to come to some kind of revelation.

"Men said you treated your people right you know, you treated them good… with respect--"

…

"--Most men would have shot me by now; I threatened to _kill_ your friends with no rational excuse… most men wouldn’t offer me a second chance." I look down at the kid and stand up, offering my hand out.

"You gonna take that second chance Reiner Braun?" He takes my hand and I pull him up. The bastard stands like a frickin’ tower above me but straightens up even more, arms bent, one hand on his front and the other on his back, a sign of respect where I’m from. A sign my men would give me to show their loyalty.

"It would be an honour to survive with you Rivaille."

"Fuckin’ right." I lift my own hand and Reiner slams me with the most laddish handshake I think I’ve ever partaken in. "Better get started then..." I raise an eyebrow at him, gesturing to my right where Mikasa and Hange stood. Reiner spins around and takes in the women he pointed a gun at less than ten minutes before.

"I’m very sorry I threatened to kill you…" He looks down and seems to struggle with what he wants to say. "…everything’s gone a bit shit lately, and I was… kind of on e-edge. I really am sorry and… I hope I can help protect your group in the future rather than bring you anymore harm." Reiner looks up again and peers at Hange. "P-please help my friend…" All of the anger has gone from the guys face, just left with his fatigue and concern for Hoover, dying in the other room. Hange blinks then nods her head enthusiastically. Picking up her backpack she runs into the kitchen with Reiner on her heels.

It’s quiet in the café and I can hear Hange already giving instructions to Jean and the freckled kid in the kitchen. Reiner quickly comes back out, picking up the blonde I temporarily incapacitated; he goes to take her back through but pauses to look at me.

"You’re a good man Rivaille." It’s gonna take more than that to convince me Reiner… I look down and feel my stomach drop because everything’s just so fucked up. Then Reiner goes back into the kitchen, leaving me and Mikasa alone.

I don’t look up at her because I’m worried she’ll turn away again, so I just sigh and pinch the bridge of my nose, a headache edging its way through my temples. I’m about to turn around to head into the kitchen myself when a gentle hand brushes my arm. I look up to see Mikasa stood in front of me, a sad look on her face… what she’s sad about, I don’t know - heck, what’s there _not_ to be sad about. I turn my head away but feel her hand cup the side of my face, making me look her in the eye.

"You are you know…" She says it quietly; almost as if she’s worried I’d get angry. "You’re… such a good man… and, I don’t know enough about you, to know what’s happened in your life to make you so… _incapable_ of seeing that… but _you are_." Before I can think of a reply she wraps her arms around me and buries her face against my neck, making her next words muffled. "And thank you… for helping me again…and again… and again." I let out a puff of laughter at that and wrap my own arms around her waist.

It’s a weird feeling, when I saw that gun pointed at her, the lengths I knew I would go to to rip apart whoever could pull the trigger.

It’s a feeling I haven’t had in a long time, a fear of losing someone…

… important…?

People have been pawns to me for so many years now; I lost more people on a monthly basis than I got to know them.

And then _everything_ was taken from me.

Before the apocalypse, I didn’t have anything left to lose…

..but now… I’ve got more to lose than I’ve ever had before…and that scares me...

...because I know the person in my arms is strong…

..but they’re also… so...

Fucking

Fragile

 


	11. Goodbye?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chapter carries on straight from the last <3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoo Chapter Updaaaate!!! Everyone who has left kudos and commented so far, you're awesome XD Your feedback is always appreciated so much! Spread the love!!! *Throws confetti* *Immediately regrets confetti*

(Mikasa POV)

I feel Levi slide his arms around my waist and I squeeze him tighter, because I feel safe, I feel safer here than anywhere else. We both seem quite content, coming down from the adrenaline of what just transpired within this quaint, now rather dilapidated café. I’m about to let go when I hear the kitchen door open, making me instinctively freeze.

I hear Levi sigh before she even starts talking...

"Awwww, group huuuug--" Hange slowly circles her arms around us and I carefully look up to see her close her eyes, a serene expression spreading over her face. Levi and I look at each other and I can tell he’s battling the urge to push her off but I just shrug and gently shake my head.

She clearly needed this as much as we do...

"--I’m so glad we’re all okay…" Hange whispers it, completely unaware of the growing discomfort of the two people encircled in her arms. I remove my own from around Levi and rest them on his chest, ready to tell Hange we should really get moving.

" _Hange_ …" Levi beats me to it but he’s quickly cut off by Hange’s arms gripping us tighter.

"No! Just a tiny bit longer… please, I wanna remember this before the inevitable shit storm comes." Levi looks up at that and nudges Hange’s shoulder to get her attention.

" _Hange_ …!" She opens her eyes. "What are you talking about?" Levi’s hands have moved to rest on my hips, showing he’s also ready to get moving when Hange lets us go. She clears her throat.

"Um, if what Reiner and co in there told me is true, we’ve got a pretty big problem on its way here…" We both look up at her and I subconsciously grip the front of Levi’s shirt.

"What kind of problem?" My voice sounds small between the three of us. Hange doesn’t answer and as quick as before, Levi reacts, breaking our contact and pushing Hange a few steps away. He grabs her arm, making her look him in the eye.

"What the _fuck_ is on its way here, Hange?" My body feels cold with the new distance between us, Levi’s voice is low as if he were threatening somebody else, but it’s still gentle. His grip on Hange’s arm only just firm enough to keep her in place so he doesn’t accidently hurt her.

Because he would never hurt her...

"Th-the creature that attacked Bertholdt in the other room…" She looks up at Levi then pans over to me. "… it was the same kind of creature from the hospital, going off both descriptions. They were attacked by a hoard of them some ways out, but Reiner says since they got here yesterday evening, the hoard was m-maybe… a day away. They thought maybe they had till morning but it’s already three now so they could get here any minute..." Hange’s voice lowers and she looks to Levi again who releases her arm. "W-we _need_ to leave this shopping village as soon as we can Levi…" He takes a step back and runs a hand through his dark hair, taking a deep breath as if to ground himself, he then looks up, face completely rid of emotion.

"Guess we should get the fuck out of here then." Hange nods and we follow her towards the kitchen, she stops before we can go through, gesturing for Levi to go first. He kicks the door open, a bored look on his face and takes in the room. I step in beside him and spot the other men who I hadn’t met yet. Bertholdt no doubt the guy still lying down, semi-conscious on the table in the middle of the room and a freckled boy talking to Jean as they finish wrapping bandages around the injured guy’s middle. Levi steps forward towards Reiner who straightens, having only just noticed us enter the room.

"Heard there’s a shit storm on its way, Reiner?" The larger man pales slightly and glances down to Bertholdt, Levi following his line of sight. "Is he alright?"

"Yeah, Hange said he’ll live for now, but he really needs to be stitched up properly soon… we need to find him some more pain meds and get him to your camp’s doctor." Reiner looks up again, taking a glance at me behind Levi.

"Good, ‘cause we need to move now. We need to be gone from this place by the time those things get here." Everyone nods in agreement and starts putting their things together.

"Do we know where the others will be?" Jean finishes Bertholdt’s bandage and helps the guy slowly sit up. "How are we supposed to gather everyone else?" I hear Levi swear under his breath and watch him close his eyes to think.

"How many of you _are_ there?" I look over to spot the blonde girl Levi incapacitated earlier, clearly having recovered a bit.

"There are three more of us; they would have gone in the opposite direction since the idea of today was to cover as much ground outwards as possible." I step forwards as I explain.

"We’ll make our way back to the rendezvous points, hope we come across them there, if not we’ll just have to head out to find them. Worse comes to worse, we’ll have to split up, some go looking out for them and the rest head back to the car. Clearly Hoover won’t be able to be on his feet for long."  Reiner nods at Levi and goes to help Bertholdt stand up. Everyone seems quite calm at the moment, just going with the punches.

That is until the blonde girl decides she’s not comfortable with the whole idea...

"And WHAT, we’re just gonna go with these people Reiner?! This jackass just knocked me out no problem, what the hell makes you think we can trust them?!" Reiner’s about to counter the young girls argument when Levi steps up to her, close enough to make the girl take an involuntary step back.

"I understand why you might be hesitant to join us, it’s a fucking free-for-all out there and most of those participating are assholes. I’m very sorry--" Levi raises his eyebrows, a subtle gesture for the girl to fill in.

"Annie" She says her name quietly, tension clear in her shoulders.

"-- _Annie_ …" The apology’s an empty gesture, everyone in the room on edge and eager to get out. "…for what happened earlier but you were a threat. If you don’t want to come, you don’t have to, but you better make your mind up _right fucking now_ because I’m not taking along anyone who might change their minds and put people _I_ care about in more danger than they’re already in…! Do you understand?!" Annie stands up straighter and peers at Reiner who tries to convince her further.

"Come on Annie! I know this wasn’t part of the plan but _trust me_ , this guys a fucking heaven sent for us if we want to keep surviving…!" The girl nods her head, looking Levi in the eye, her bored expression turning to one of resignation.

"Good." Levi steps back and we start heading out the door, Reiner and Jean carrying Bertholdt between the two of them as we go.

 

We head back the way we originally came, the eight of us listening out for any signs of the other three, or possible creatures in the distance. Levi and Hange are talking up front, speaking quietly amongst themselves. I don’t want to interrupt but a sinking in my stomach has a bad feeling about Hange’s reaction to whatever Levi’s saying.

My thoughts are suddenly interrupted by a timid voice...

"Hello…" I look to my left and notice the freckled boy smiling at me shyly. "M-my names Marco, I’m really sorry about what happened back there but… if I’m being completely honest, I’m really happy you guys showed up." He looks down again but keeps going. "It was getting pretty tense between the four of us, especially with Bertholdt how he was. You seem like good people…" Marco glances round to peer at the three guys behind us. "…your friend Jean was really nice to me when him and--" He gestures gingerly to Levi in front of us.

"Levi?" He nods and continues.

"--when they showed up... I was pretty much on the verge of totally freaking out, I knew those creatures were on the way, we’d already discussed that morning about getting out of there b-but… Bertholdt made that very difficult. Then there was all the stuff going on outside the kitchen… Jean calmed me down and helped me keep Bertholdt steady whilst we waited for your Levi to take care of the situation." I look up and smile at Marco, the guy was clearly a little in over his head. I found the four of them to be a rather odd mixture to be honest, although, I’m not sure I’m really in any position when looking around at my own group.

"Yeah, Jean is one of the good ones…" Marco blushes slightly but smiles. "…and it’s going to be alright now, we’ll figure out a plan, find the others and we’ll get out of here." I look forwards again and push my fear deep down, trying to convince myself more than anyone. "So how did you four end up as a group, kinda seems like you all ran in rather different circles?" Marco chuckles lightly at my question.

"I’ve been with the others for a couple weeks now. They found me outside a gas station a state over, Reiner didn’t want me tagging along at first but we were attacked by some… bad people, Reiner and Annie saved my life that day and let me come with them for a while. I don’t think Annie had been with them for very long by this point."

"I suppose the end of the world has a habit of bringing the most unlikely of people together…" Our conversation simmers off at that point but we still walk in a relative, comfortable silence, millings of other conversations still going on around us.

 

About thirty minutes later we arrive back at the rendezvous point and I hear Hange announce the others absence before I have a chance to look around myself.

"They’re not _here_ Levi! What should we do?"

"We’ll just have to head off in their direction and hope we come across them before any of the fuckers show up. We can’t leave them out their completely unaware." Levi gestures to Reiner and Jean still holding up Bertholdt’s body. "Lay him down on one of the benches for now, we’ll have to-"

"LEVI!!!" Everyone turns around and we watch Furlan hurl himself over a fallen cart. "Shit!! We have to leave now!" Levi runs over to him, both of them meeting in the middle. "There are a shit tone of those bastards coming from the east, we’ve gotta get out of here!"

The east? That’s the direction of the truck…

" _We know,_  we just came all the way back here to warn you guys about them!" Levi runs his hand through his hair again and Furlan leans over to catch his breath. I notice Connie and Sasha coming up in the distance. Furlan stands up straight and looks at all of us, stood, waiting to make a move. He gestures with his hand, his other sub-consciously going to his knife.

"Who are they?"

"They’re fine Furlan, there was a… minor disagreement but it’s sorted. They’re gonna come with us."

"What happened to _him_?" Furlan nods his head towards Bertholdt, concern now taking over the initial aggression on his face.

"They were attacked yesterday by a hoard of the creatures currently about to spread through _this_ village so we need to get back to the trucks,  _now_!" Sasha and Connie finally reach us and they jog over to stand with me, the concern on their own faces telling me everything I need to know regarding our situation.

"They’ll reach us here within the next half hour, they’re pretty slow but they can pounce like fucking animals!" Connie shouts it, flailing his hands in the air, assuring everyone’s attention. Levi turns around and holds up his hand, trying to get Connie to calm down as Sasha places a hand on his shoulder. Everyone walks over towards the bench where Bertholdt’s now currently sitting upright, breathes laboured. Furlan looks at Levi who nods, giving him the go ahead.

"Okay, so, those things are coming from the east which is the direction we need to go in order to reach the trucks. We need to get them further into the shopping village so we can circle round and get out of here…" Furlan draws everyone in, his voice taking on an authoritative tone to help assure everyone else, but his eyes flicker back every so often to Levi, looking for that reassurance.

"How are we going to do that? They followed Reiner and that from miles away, if they see us head off, they’ll just give chase?" Jean’s input has sound reasoning and I have a bad feeling about where this plan could go. Hange then steps forward.

"Someone or a couple people will have to lure the creatures towards the centre of the village whilst everyone else goes around the outside in order to get back to the trucks-"

"Are you crazy?!" Jean steps forward. "That’s a suicide mission, two people can’t fight off that many creatures with just a gun and a couple knives…!"

"Well actually…" Hange turns around and pulls the vodka we found earlier from her backpack. "…I may be able to help with that…" She lifts the bottle up and gestures towards us.

" _Alcohol_ …?" Reiner lifts an eyebrow sceptically.

"No..." Levi takes the bottle from Hange so she can get the rest of the supplies out of her bag. "…explosives." Everyone seems to take in what this means, two people will stay behind, luring the creatures towards the centre then open fire with homemade...molotovs?

"Jean’s still right, this is crazy!" I step back and try to think passed all the ways this could go horribly wrong. Furlan speaks up again, still the leader of our group on this mission.

"It is…but it’s our only way out at the moment. We need to decide who’s gonna stay behind and keep the creatures back whilst everyone else goes around…" He looks to Levi and Hange, a decision seemingly already made between the three of them. I look at Levi and catch his eye. He doesn't let any emotion through and then glances away to address the group.

No, please…no...

"I’ll stay behind; I just need someone to watch my back so I can-"

"I’ll go!" I step forward and it comes out my mouth like the whole thing shouldn’t have even been a discussion, but Levi seems to have been expecting it.

"No-"

"Why!?" I lean further across the bench.

Was I not good enough?

Did he not trust me?

Would I just get in the way?

"B _ecause_ , I already sent you in the direction of those bastards once before and I’m not about to do that again…"

"Well I handled it fine didn’t I, let me come with you!"

"No!"

" _Why_?!" I feel a hand on my shoulder and turn to see Furlan, a sad look on his face. Part of me had forgotten there were actually other people around us; it wasn’t just me and Levi having this discussion.

"Mikasa…" Furlan’s voice is gentle and he squeezes my shoulder. "…I think it would be better if you stayed with us, helping everyone get out…" Reiner steps forwards and rests his hand on Berthold’s shoulder.

"I’ll go…" He looks over to Levi who nods his appreciation, then looks over to me. "…I’ll make sure he gets out of this in one piece." I nod back my own appreciation, but I can’t find it in me to say anything.

I feel sick...

There’s suddenly a high pitched wail in the distance and everyone around the circle tenses up.

"Time to go…!" Furlan gestures for Jean and Annie to lift up Berthold.

Hange turns back around; two rather obscure bottled contraptions in either hand. She passes them to Reiner then turns to pick up two more, giving them to Levi. Both shove the bottles precariously into their packs, turning back to Hange when she starts talking.

"Now, I picked the vodka up from the café restaurant, the bottles are just discarded from the food counters, and…" She hands Levi a lighter. "…you’re gonna wanna light, then throw, pretty immediately, okay!?" Levi nods at her and shoves the lighter in the pocket of his jeans.

"Got it Hange..."

"And you wanna be standing at least twenty feet from your target otherwise-"

"Okay _Hange_ …"

"Oh a-and you need to-"

" _Hange_!" Levi takes her arms and forces her to look him in the eye. "I’m sure it’ll be fine." She nods but looks down.

"Just, please don’t die..." She says it whilst letting out a light chuckle but it’s easy to see she’s scared.

"I promise I’ll try my best." His voice is low, still sounding as disinterested as ever, but I’m starting to think that’s just his coping mechanism by now. Levi turns to Furlan who’s gotten everyone else ready to go. "Reiner and I will start east immediately, you take everyone else up north-west then go around, as soon as you hear commotion from the first explosion you get in the truck and get out of there." Furlan nods, but then a thoughtful concerned expression takes over his face.

"Where should we go? If we went straight back to camp, what’s stopping the leftover bastards following us back?" Levi thinks about this, glancing over to us then back to Furlan.

"We could go to the next town over, there’s a suburban area cut off from the highway, find an empty house and lay low for the night. Hange can stitch Bertholdt up properly there and give him some meds. The main truck should wait outside the area, leave the parking lot and wait by the main exit, whoever drives the other vehicle will need to wait for Reiner and I to show up, but if there’s no sign of us after twenty minutes, then they _need_ to go. _Got it_?" Furlan nods.

The wailing in the distance has gotten louder and we need to leave… now.

Furlan looks at Levi and Reiner one last time before turning to the rest of us, making his way to the front.

"Come on let’s go!" Everyone starts heading north-west just as Levi said, the opposite direction to the increasing wails of the creatures, the _hoard_ of creatures the other two are about to run towards.

I’m the only one left still standing in the same spot, and I feel torn...

_"Mikasa!"_

Do I say goodbye?

_"Mikasa, we need to go!"_

Do I _not_ say goodbye?

If I say goodbye, it sounds like we’ll never see each other again, but if I don’t say goodbye and he doesn’t come back, then… I’m taken out of my thoughts, two hands cupping the sides of my face. I raise it to see Levi looking back at me, his grey eyes swirling with an emotion I haven’t seen before and I glance down.

He looks like he’s saying my name...

"Mikasa...! Hange, take her _now_!" He’s looking over my shoulder and somebody grabs my arm, pulling me back in the other direction, Levi’s hands falling from my face.

"No! No no no, _wait please."_ I grab hold of his hand before Hange can pull me further away. Quickly loosening the grip I have on him, he steps forwards again and presses his forehead against my own.

"Mikasa, _please_ , you _need_ to go. I promise…" I can feel a tear escape, my own voice breaking with my last sentence.

"No, I _can’t_ …" I can’t lose you too… "Please, let me come with you!" I can feel him shake his head.

"Mikasa, I promise I’ll come back, I will come _back_ to you, I swear…" He steps away and I can feel Hange pulling me again, but this time I go, everything numb. "Make sure she doesn’t do anything stupid Hange." Levi turns to go, picking up his pack and gesturing to Reiner.

And then he was gone…

 

(Levi POV)

Why wasn’t she running…?

I can hear the screeching getting louder and louder behind us, the creatures now only maybe ten minutes away.

"Mikasa!" I shout her name and spin my head around to see Hange halt, turning around to get her.

"Mikasa, we need to _go_!" Hange looks up at me, panic written all over her face when she doesn’t respond.

"Levi…!" Reiner appears beside me, a pleading tone in his voice.

Fuck!

"Mikasa...!  _MIKASA_!" I drop my bag and step forwards, taking Mikasa’s face in my hands to get her attention, her eyes glazed over. "Mikasa...! Hange, take her _now_!" Hange runs over, grabbing Mikasa’s arm to pull her back, making me let go. I start to think they’ll get away but she grabs hold of my hand. I turn back again, looking over her face, once full of so little expression, it tells me a whole lot more than I thought I’d see.

"No! No no no, _wait please...!"_

 _Mikasa_ …

I loosen the grip she has on me and step forwards once more, holding my forehead against her own. Lowering my voice, I wipe the tears that start falling down her face.

I’m not worth crying over Ackerman…

"Mikasa, _please_ , you _need_ to go. I promise…"

"No, I _can’t_ …please, let me come with you!" I shake my head.

No...

I can’t lose you too…

"Mikasa, I promise I’ll come back, I will come _back_ to you, I swear…" I raise my head back up and nod to Hange behind who tries encouraging Mikasa away again. Part of me worries she’ll resist a second time, but she doesn’t. I have to stop myself from changing my mind, to tell her to come with me, risks be damned. "Make sure she doesn’t do anything stupid Hange."

I grab my pack and gesture to Reiner as we start sprinting in the other direction, not looking back.

Now running towards the inevitable shit storm waiting for us around the corner, Reiner and I don’t get far before the first one shows up, okay, change of plan.

"Hang a right!" We sprint down one of the side alleys which lead to the more open area in the centre of the shopping village. "So… how many are we talking here?" We’re still running pretty fast so talking wasn’t the best idea, but I needed some sense on what we’re dealing with.

"Um…uh…m-maybe like…fifteen?" Okay, fifteen isn’t too bad. "But they seem to rise in numbers at a pretty fast rate, so th-there could be more now…" I can see Reiner shrug from the corner of my eye. I can hear the creatures catching up; it only seemed to take the one to spot us for the rest to follow suit. 

We take out the occasional walker as we run by, guns out, since calling attention to ourselves was the general idea anyway, what were a few gunshots. We sprint through the broken street until I notice an open building up ahead to our left. A couple of the creatures are getting uncomfortably close behind so we need to shake them off before putting the rest of the plan into action. As we get closer I notice the building had been opened up all the way through; if we use it as a short cut through to the market area we can round up the bastards there.

"Reiner, the broken building up on our left, run through it until we reach the market place, once we’re there…" The screeching behind us is maybe ten feet away now, the pitch suggesting it wants to pounce. "…sprint for the middle of the stalls where we’ll wait for the rest of them to show up. Once we have them in our sights we’ll set a trap with the molotovs, okay?!" Reiner nods from next to me and I wait a few more seconds until giving the go ahead. "NOW!"

We take a violent turn to the left, the creature behind us pouncing just as we swerve out the way. The rubble causes us to skid but we both keep ourselves up right and keep running through. One of the fuckers manages to catch up so I stop, duck and kick it in the shin, causing a wail to come from its throat as I drive my knife through its head. "Keep going!" Reiner keeps running through the building until he’s out the other end. I wait, because we still need them to follow us, we can’t have any of them going off back East, towards the others.

No, that’s not an option…

Now half way through the broken store, I look back to see more of the creatures sniffing the air, looking for blood.

Because that’s what they want…

I look down at my hand, healed from where I sliced it open at the hospital to get the attention of the first creature we saw. Healed from where Mikasa bandaged it up… I grab my knife and follow the line across my skin from before, the blood immediately spilling over to run down my wrist. I look up and catch the front of the hoard reach the building’s opening, the first one stands up on its two legs and sniffs the air.

I bet I smell _fucking delicious_ …

It looks through the building and spots me, slowly setting itself down onto all fours, then screams, a sound that vibrates through my whole body. Straight away it gets a reply, screeching from the rest, not far behind.  
  
Looks like he just rang the dinner bell and its Blood á la Levi…

I start running again through the rest of the building until I can see the space open up the other end. Once I reach the market place outside, I head for the back row of stalls and spot Reiner who waves at me frantically. He ducks back down as I slide down beside him, both of us breathing heavily.

"Dude, your hand…?" I raise it half-heartedly, my eyes closed as I focus on my breathing.

"Blood, that’s what they want, so that’s what we’ll lure them out with…" I look over to see Reiner taking out his own knife and slice it across his palm.

"Smart…" He clasps his hand into a fist. "You figure that out just now?" The guy’s blind faith in me is something I want to address, but right now, I’ll go with it.

"No, Mikasa…Mikasa did, when we ran into one of the assholes before…" The screeching has reached the market place as the creatures start coming out of the building. I poke my head around and see the one in front stand up again, sniffing the air like before. "Okay so, we’re gonna split up, you run to the department store that way, I’ll go into the warehouse over there." I gesture to the two locations with my good hand. "Run inside, assuring you have a chunk of the hoard on your tail, give them a goose chase, as many obstacles as you can, then circle around. Once you’re confident you have them jammed inside the building looking for you, get out and lob the molotov inside behind you. Burn the fuckers, you got it?" Reiner nods, his shoulders tensing at what is possibly the riskiest plan I’ve ever put together, and I’ve come up with some risky shit in my time.

As Jean said, it’s a suicide mission…

"No problem."

" _Good_ , once you’re out, run as fast as you can to the truck, Mikasa should be waiting for us to get out…"

"How do you know _she’ll_ be there?"

"Because she’s too _fucking_ stubborn to let anyone else do it…" I close my eyes again then check around the side of the stall, more and more creatures starting to spread across the area. I lean back again and glance at Reiner. We nod at each other and I give the signal to go…

…so we leg it…

I run as fast as I can towards the warehouse, bottles rattling in my bag. Not a second after I run out from behind the stall, I hear the same creature screech. I don’t have time to spare a glance back at Reiner, so I just have to hope he doesn’t fuck it up.

I reach the warehouse and quickly spin around, checking how many I have on my tail, great, at least two-thirds. I sprint up the stairs as the first creature pounces through the front door. Taking two steps at a time, I throw myself around the first corner as I hear thundering paces coming up from behind me. Manoeuvring around stacks upon stacks of boxes, I try to get as much distance between me and them without losing chase.

The first floor of the building is huge but covered with various different stock piles, boxes giving me enough cover to make my way around the edge of the wall, heading back towards an exit. I can hear most of the creatures inside the building now so I just have to get out…

I hold the still bleeding hand to my chest and crouch, starting towards the front where the creatures have begun to fair out. I’m so close when something catches my attention out the corner of my eye, that same creature. He stands on two legs, sniffing the air in my direction and goes to pounce, my brain having hardly enough time to react.

I roll out of the way just in time and decide…

Fuck it…

I sprint towards the exit and jump down the stair case, stragglers of the hoard already changing their direction. As I get to the entrance I throw the massive door closed behind me, the screeching from inside becoming a dull sound. Without thinking more about it, I grab a bottle from my bag and run away from the building, lobbing my first lit molotov through the top window.

I can hear their screaming; the fire spreading just as we wanted, but I throw my second one just to be sure. It smashes through the other window with blackened bodies following shortly behind it, falling to the floor.

Then I start running, I don’t look back and head East...

 

(Mikasa POV)

We reach the parking lot and sprint towards the trucks, the first explosion going off in the distance.

"In the truck _now_ …!" Furlan helps open up the back so Bertholdt can be laid down, Annie, Jean and Marco getting in after him, Connie and Sasha squeezing behind the front seats.

"I’ll stay!" I stand next to the smaller truck which Hange and Levi came in. "You guys get out the area and wait by the exit like Levi said and we’ll catch up as soon as they get back, then we’ll drive to the next town over." Hange steps over to me with concern written all over her face.

"Someone should stay here with you…" Another explosion goes off; the creature’s screeching being heard from all the way back here.

"No, the less people left around here the better, in case something goes wrong." Hange nods and gives me a hug, whispering in my ear.

"They’ll be here… it’s gonna take more than that to kill off Rivaille…" She steps back and makes her way into the larger truck. That might be the case, but I don’t _know_ Rivaille… I don’t know a lot of things  _yet_ …Furlan jumps into the driver’s side, looking back out at me from his window before starting the engine.

"Twenty minutes Mikasa!" He starts the engine. "After that, you leave and we need to get out of here… _Understand_?" I nod. They pull out of the space and head towards the exit, leaving me alone to wait for the other’s return. I jump into the truck and start the engine, pulling up slightly closer to the entrance.

Twenty minutes…

I look around, only a few walkers in sight, most having been drawn in by all the commotion at the centre of the shopping village. I grip the steering wheel and take a deep breath.

Eighteen minutes…

I look up at the sky and notice the stars that have started to come out, the afternoon gradually sinking into evening.

_'The sky was one of the things I missed most whilst I was in prison, two years and I didn’t see a single _fucking_  star.’_

My mind starts to drift…

Thirteen minutes…

_‘Honestly…I just miss a good cup of tea.’_

I look down at the bag at my feet, the tea still sitting inside.

Ten minutes…

I take another deep breath, glancing around the outside, trying to distract myself from the sickening feeling in my stomach. A walker stumbles right passed the truck, the dark making it hard to make out any details on its rotting face.  

_‘That’s not gonna be you, you know…not any time soon.’_

Eight minutes…

I look towards the exit, part of me fighting the urge to run back inside, to look for them myself… but that would be stupid.

_‘Make sure she doesn’t do anything stupid Hange.’_

Six minutes…

Another walker stumbles into the side of the truck and my hand reaches for the knife tucked into my waist band.

_'She’s right though, I fucking love that knife, so if you lose it…’_

Four minutes…

I close my eyes and take another deep breath.

Three minutes…

_‘I will come back to you, I swear….’_

Two minutes…

No more explosions have gone off and the distant screeching stops.

I look down at the truck’s clock; I’ve been sitting here for twenty minutes. The others would head off to the next town over and expect me to be following behind them; my hands turn white from my grip on the steering wheel.

Maybe I _should_ have said goodbye…

I turn the engine on when suddenly someone throws the door open and jumps into the back seat, turning around I see Reiner collapse, breathing heavy.

" _Reiner_ …!" I take in the blood coming from his hand and a scratch across his neck. "…Where’s Levi?!" He looks up at me, and then gestures limply to the seat beside mine. I look over, confusedm and then the passenger door flings open. Levi jumps inside and slams the door behind him, his breathing just as heavy. I release a breath of my own I didn’t even realise I had been holding.

My eyes rake over his body, searching for any injuries and all I spot is a cut across his hand, the same place he made it in the hospital. I look up at him then lean my head against the steering wheel, burying my emotions behind my hair.

"I hate you so much…" My voice is muffled and I can hear Levi chuckle next to me. I sit back, putting the car in gear and run my hand through my hair. Few tears of relief trickle down my face, but I quickly wipe them away as I pull out of the parking lot. Once I avoid the few walkers scattered around, I glance back over to Levi who’s already looking in my direction. I want to hug him, I want to touch him, make sure he’s really _here_ , that he’s really okay… but I’ve gotta get us out of here first. I feel Reiner lean forwards in the back and stick his head through the gap between our seats, breathe still heavy.

"I’ll tell you what…" Levi and I glance at him then back at each other.  "…I’m _never_ … fucking doing that again."

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There were so many different ways this chapter nearly ended, and I'll tell you, the one I went with definitely had the least bloodshed... so that's good I guess XD So feelings were certainly made quite clear in this chapter but I think we all know it's never that easy.  
> Another fun fact, I wrote most of this whilst listening to The Greatest Showman soundtrack, so now you can imagine me dancing some sick moves whilst writing those chase scenes, hahaa XD  
> Thanks again for reading, and I really hope you enjoyed the new update !! <333  
> Tumblr just in case you wanna talk about the fic in any other regard - jovialjellyfishreaper


	12. Family

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OMG! Hello!! First of all, I'm so sorry about the delayed update! Spring/Easter break totally threw me off schedule and then going back to college was a bit of a proverbial slap in the face XD But I'm back...
> 
> Chapter 12 is quite a quiet chapter, like a wind down after the past two, more action filled ones. It's predominantly dialogue with Levi and Mikasa, but some cute fluff too! <3 Really hope you enjoy it!! 
> 
> Thank you so much for all your continued support!! Reading your messages and comments on how much you like it makes me so happy! Since that's why I write it, for you guys!!! Smiles and kisses <33333

(Mikasa POV)

We pull up outside a dark, quiet suburban house just in time to see Furlan and Annie walk out, giving the all clear. I park behind the other truck and watch the others climb out; desperately trying to get Bertholdt somewhere he can be treated. The three of us drove here in relative silence, just the sound of our breathing and the car’s engine. Once the truck was empty, Hange turns around at the front door, giving us a smile before disappearing into the dark house. I hear Reiner move in the back seat then peek his head back through the gap between mine and Levi’s. Slapping Levi on the shoulder, he smiles.

"I’ll leave and give you two a moment." And with that he gets out, hobbling ever so slightly up the path. I appreciated Reiner’s help, but I still hadn’t forgotten the gun he pointed at me. I sigh loudly then let out a low chuckle, covering my face with my hands. I can feel Levi’s eyes on me which makes me look up, and I notice the bleeding on his hand showing no sign of stopping. My voice sounds loud in the silence of the car, but I know it’s not.

"We, um… we should go and stitch that up…" I glance up to look at him. "…again." He lets out his own humourless chuckle and goes to get out the car. I have no idea what to say, the whole day seeming like it passed by in a blur.

A long and stressful blur…

I get out the car myself and wait for Levi to walk around, cradling his wounded hand against his chest. The guy looked absolutely knackered. As he’s about to walk passed, I grab hold of his good hand, stopping him in his track and I can hear the subtle sound of everyone else sorting themselves out inside.

"I’m, uh, I’m… _really_ glad you're not dead…" I don’t let go of his hand, worried he might walk away. I’m not really sure where we stand, but the atmosphere had grown tense on the way over here. My heart beating faster in my chest, mind foggy from exhaustion. I feel Levi loosen the grip I have on his hand and I look down to see him curl his own fingers around mine.

"Yeah… me too." He chuckles lightly, more life coming into his eyes when I look up again. "And as much as I... really want to do _this_ …" He gestures between the two of us. "...I am still losing quite a bit of blood." He smiles at that and I can’t help laugh at how awkward we both are at _this_. I grab the front of his shirt and start dragging him towards the door. We step inside the suburban house and everything’s relatively quiet. Hange’s stitching Reiner up at a kitchen counter, Jean and Marco having taken Bertholdt upstairs to one of the bedrooms to lie down.

"Well, well, well, would you look who it is, you really are one untouchable son of a bitch aren’t you Levi!?" Hange cackles lightly, looking up from her handy work on Reiner. Levi shrugs nonchalantly beside me, raising his good hand. I lead us over to the counter and start pulling some supplies out of the bag Hange’s using.

"You alright sweetheart…?" Hange smiles at me as I sit down next to her and Levi takes a seat opposite, sitting next to Reiner. "There’s some sterile needles in there you can use." She points at the white package amongst the array of bandages in front of us.

"Everyone else get out okay?" Levi directs the question at Hange who nods whilst still concentrating on what she’s doing.

"Yes, everyone got out okay, Bertholdt’s resting upstairs, I’ve got to go up and help patch him up a bit better and give him some meds when I’m finished with Reiner. Furlan and the Annie girl are scouting the place to be a bit more thorough. Most people are just finding somewhere to lie down, they’re all exhausted…" She looks up at Levi and raises an eyebrow. "Much like yourself, you better get some rest once Mikasa has stitched you up."

I finish sorting out the needle and cleaning Levi’s hand, my own hands shaking from the post adrenaline. I spread out his long fingers and get ready to close the wound. His hands are strangely delicate for someone of his background… delicate but strong, like you wouldn’t know whether he was gonna kick your ass or start playing the piano. I take a deep breath and start feeding the needle into his hand; I don’t have anything to numb the pain so I admire the mere sharp intake of breath Levi takes. My hands are still shaking and I feel Hange glance at me from the corner of her eye.

"Mikasa, just take a deep breath, okay…?" I do as she says and close my eyes for a second. I feel Levi move to rest his good hand on my arm that supports his injured one. He leans forward and keeps his voice gentle.

"Mikasa… I know we’ve just been through a lot of shit and we all just kinda need a long fucking nap…" I open my eyes and look into his, the grey pools calming me down. "…but I’d really appreciate it if you didn’t fuck up my hand more than it already is…" He cracks a smile when I scowl at him. Hange finishes patching Reiner up and smacks Levi’s arm, Reiner slightly shocked at her willingness to hit the notorious ex con.

"Levi! The girl thought you were gonna die, we _all_ thought you were gonna die – have a little compassion!" Levi isn’t at all deterred by Hange’s reaction and I smile at the normality of the situation, something I’m sure Levi was counting on when he said it.

"First of all four eyes, I’m slightly insulted that _everybody_ thought I was gonna die…"

"You know what I meant; of course we didn’t really..." Hange raises her hands defensively, Levi just raising an eyebrow at her backtracking. I continue with the stitching, my hands finally steady with Levi’s hand resting on my arm and then Connie appears at the end of the counter.

"Well _I_ knew _you’d_ be alright!!" He throws an arm around Levi’s shoulders, Levi looking rather unimpressed by the human contact.

"No one likes a kiss ass Springer." Usually someone would retract themselves at Levi’s tone but Connie seems to latch on tighter. At that moment Furlan and Sasha appear from around the back rooms and head straight for us.

"LEVI!!" Sasha flings herself around Levi’s other side, mirroring Connie. Furlan walking up and hugging him from behind.

"We’re all very glad you’re okay…" Furlan says it quietly, Levi now completely encompassed by his camp mates. I’ve nearly finished the stitches but stop as to avoid the others jolting me whilst I work. I look up at Levi and see him sigh silently whilst waiting for the others to get their hug over with.

"You think you can get off now…?" Levi’s tone is completely void of emotion, but his eyes seem like they’re secretly relieved at seeing his friends alive and okay. Reiner gets up from his seat beside the hug fest and smiles at Levi.

"Wherever he goes, Rivaille will organise the most loyal of men." Then he leaves to find Bertholdt. Hange’s about to follow when she turns, and decides to join the group, latching onto the back.

"Oh for fuck sake…" Levi says it quietly and rolls his eyes. I smile at him, taking in the scene in front of me, thinking back to the respect and admiration all of these people had spoken about the supposed dangerous criminal. Levi clearly cared about his people and took care of them, but I don’t think he ever really believed the same feelings when they were reciprocated. They all cared a lot but I could tell they were starting to push their luck slightly, so I try and step in.

"I do need to finish stitching him up so if you guys wanna continue this _later_ …?" I raise my eyebrows and watch them slowly detach themselves. I think they’re about to all leave when Connie, Sasha and Hange circle around to do the same to me, crushing me in a rather unforeseen embrace. I look back to Levi who seems grateful for the freedom but smiles at my own growing discomfort. 

"Alright guys come on, let them finish." Furlan gestures for everyone else to leave. "Find somewhere to rest for now and we’ll figure out a watch rotation in a bit, Hange, the others are ready with Bertholdt upstairs."

"Okay Dokay!" The three of them release me and make their way up stairs, Furlan smiling at us once more before heading to the back of the house. Leaving Levi and I to sit in a comfortable silence whilst I finish off his stitches. I start putting away the medic supplies and stand up from the counter, feeling Levi’s eyes follow me around the kitchen. My head is all over the place, I’m stuck in someone’s pre-apocalyptic family home, the potential threat of those bastards still at large, but all I can think about are the eyes following me.

"You should go lay down somewhere and rest before Furlan puts the rotation together…" I spin around at Levi's voice and take in his tired eyes.

"Don’t you think _you-!"_ He holds a hand up to cut me off.

"I will rest as soon as I’ve caught up with Furlan…" He smirks at my glare. "…I promise…"

" _Fine_ , but I swear to God Levi, if you don’t give your body time to rest…" I lift the needle still in my hand. "…I will _sew_ your fucking eyes shut." His smirk turns into a full on smile and he raises an eyebrow.

"Duly noted…" I place the rest of the supplies back in Hange’s bag then start to leave, stopping just behind Levi who places his head in his hands. The man’s absolutely exhausted. I move before I can convince myself otherwise and wrap by arms around the back of his torso, resting my head on his shoulder, mirroring what the others had done just moments ago. I can feel Levi lift his head up and I start to remove the hold I have around his body, but he stops me, placing his own hand over mine and resting his head back. When I turn my face to the side I can see into his eyes. "You’re a lot more touchy feely than I had you pegged for." I can feel Levi’s deep voice vibrate from where we touch, the usual flat tenor soothing, but I can hear the catch of teasing in his tone.

"Shut up…" I kick the back of his boots from under the chair and bury my face back into his shoulder. "Everyone else got to do it." I know I sound like a child and he chuckles accordingly, bringing his hand up to run through my hair.

"Go lay down Mikasa…" His voice is quiet and he releases my arms that circle around him. I lift my head and stand up straight, taking a step back with my hand still resting on his arm. My reluctance to leave must have been palpable, making Levi turn around; he takes my hand from his arm, giving it a squeeze before letting it go. "Goodnight Mikasa…" I smile and turn leave. As I start to walk away Hange appears from the bottom of the stairs.

"Hey honey, if you wanna lay down, the top room on the left is free…" She smiles at me then turns to look at Levi. "...I’ll make sure he gets some rest." And I fully believed if anyone could get Levi to cooperate, it was Hange, so I head up the stairs, leaving the two alone.

 

(Levi POV)  


I watch Mikasa go up the stairs, her company now replaced with Hange’s, slowly making her way towards me. I rest my arm on the counter, letting it support the weight of my head, because it was getting really fucking heavy. My body feels exhausted but my mind is still running a mile a minute, the tension in my shoulders the only thing keeping me conscious. I watch Hange take the seat next to me and sigh loudly.

"It sure has been a looooong day…" She looks at me. "…hasn’t it Levi?" I turn my head to look forwards, adjusting my chin in my hands.

"Yep…"

"It was productive though, that’s for sure…we met new people, made some new friends and narrowly escaped with our lives intact. So in a way… it’s kinda been a good day…" I think about what she says for a moment and raise my eyebrows.

"That’s…" She glances at me, no doubt expecting me to call bullshit on her optimism, but I just sigh. "…one way of looking at it, Hange." 

"Wow, you must be tired; you don’t even have the energy to crush other people’s spirits…" She gives me a pointed look. "… you need to sleep Levi, at least try a couple hours, even _you_ should be able to manage that." I lift my head up.

"If I can just get my brain to shut the fuck up for two minutes and let me relax…" I watch Hange pull something out of her coat pocket. "…then maybe I would."

"Well, best friend Hange to the rescue…" She holds a box up with her right hand as if she was in some kind of commercial, smiling. "…I found these in one of the draws in Bertholdt’s room whilst I was treating him." She flings the box up and I, by some miracle in my state, manage to catch it, flipping the top up.

Fucking cigarettes…

I chuckle lightly and take one out, fishing around for the lighter left over from the molotov crap earlier. I get up from the chair, thanking Hange silently, resting a hand on her shoulder before walking away.

"No smoking in the house!" She spins around to look at me before I leave. "…you have _one_ now, then get at least a couple hours sleep, then you can have another…" I raise an eye brow at her, sceptical of her confidence in telling me what to do. Hange doesn’t back down though, looking at me how I imagine a mother would a delinquent child. I rest the cigarette in my mouth, trapping it between my teeth so I can still talk and gesture my hands out.

"Yes, ma’am…"  I hear her voice getting quieter as I walk away.

"There’s a balcony at the far end of the hallway… you can smoke there…"

I make my way upstairs, stopping at the top to peer into Mikasa’s room where she’s already completely out of it. I keep walking down the corridor towards the balcony where apparently I’m _allowed_ to smoke.

"Levi?" I stop just outside the glass doors, lighter in hand, and turn to see Reiner with Furlan. "Mind if we join you?" I walk outside to the balcony and gesture lazily for them to follow.

"Sure, go nuts." They walk out with me and Riener closes the door behind him. I light the cigarette and holy mother of fuck, I can die now… I watch Furlan lean on the railing beside me, taking in the darkness below us. The world outside is eerily quiet, just the sounds of occasional wildlife going by.

"So I figured that we’d have people on watch out here and then someone down stairs. Riener and I will start…" I glance to the large blonde on my other side, taking another drag of the cigarette, relishing in that sweet, sweet nicotine.

"That a good idea…?" Riener smiles, his own exhaustion evident across his face. I mean the guy did the same suicide mission as I did today.

"I just wanted to get the watch over with so I can watch Bertholdt on and off for the rest of the night." He looks away but I don’t really care what his priorities are.

"Fair enough…" I face the darkness in front of us again, Furlan continuing what he was saying.

"Hange told me you’re gonna try sleep now so I’ll put you on for a later shift…" I turn to look at him. "…i-if that’s okay!?" He raises his hands quickly but I just shrug.

"Sounds good…"

"Cool, and um, I’ll probably get someone to wake Mikasa so you guys can have the balcony and Jean said he’ll go downstairs…" I nod my head, flicking the cigarette over the edge.

It was nice whilst it lasted...

"It’s been a stressful day, surprised you have the self-control for just the one?" Reiner chuckles, looking at me.

"Lady said I could have one now, and one after I rest…" Furlan leans forward to look at me, eyebrows raised.

"Mikasa?" I frown at him.

"Hange…!" Furlan makes an “oh” face then smiles.

"Yeah, she’s probably the only one brave enough to boss you about like that…"

" _Although_ …" We both turn to look at Reiner. "…If Mikasa put her mind to it…" The asshole has the balls to look me in the eye. "…I bet she could get you to do just about anything." He smiles, making Furlan chuckle behind me. I sigh, pushing myself back from the railing and turn once more before leaving them outside.

"You can both go fuck yourselves…" I say it curtly which makes them burst out laughing and I can’t help but smirk at that.

Because it’s nice when people still find reason to laugh…

 

(Mikasa POV)  


"Mikasaaa…Mikasaaaaaa…" I feel something push the back of my head lightly and I let out a groan. "Well, she’s alive, that’s good…" The voices are whispering, getting too close for comfort. I blink my eyes open and roll over, immediately coming face to face with Sasha, which makes her freak out.

Which makes me freak out…

"What the fuck Sasha…!" I look up to see Connie behind her. "… what are you doing?!" My voice is low but coarse from sleep. Sasha takes a step back and smiles guiltily.

"Sorry, we just had to wake you for your shift on watch…" Oh.

"Oh, okay, no that’s fine, you just scared me." Connie giggles behind her and I get up from the bed, assuming they both wanted to take it from me. I rub my hands over my face and run my fingers through my hair, waking myself up ever so slightly. I bend down and start lacing my boots back up.

"Where am I going?"

"Just down the hall…" I glance up and see Sasha pointing to the other end of the hallway. "…Levi’s already there." She smiles.

"Did he actually get any sleep?" My tone is a mixture of snarky and concerned. 

"Yeah, Hange managed to get him to take a rest for a while; he looks a lot better than earlier…" Connie step forward, interrupting Sasha.

"Although he told us that if we tried to hug him again, he’d chop my arms off and use them as zombie clubs…" I smile because it did sound like something he would say. Sasha turns around and shrugs her shoulders at him.

"At least you know you’d still be useful… protecting your friends, even in death…" The brunette smiles but Connie doesn’t look convinced, choosing to swiftly ignore her attempt at optimism on the topic. I stand up straight and he turns to look at me.

"Levi has become very important to me and a solid constant in this new life…" I find Connie’s confession sweet. "…but the dude still scares the crap out of me…" Sasha laughs at that, patting him on the shoulder.

"Yeah, me too Connie, me to…" She turns to me. "… We love him like family, but fear him like, well… _family,_ but with questionable connections and a dark history. Kind of a like a shady uncle if you may…" Sasha raises her eyebrows at me and I laugh at her weirdly accurate description of our apocalyptic relations.

I head out of the room and down the corridor towards the balcony. The glass door is closed and I peer through it, seeing the edge of Levi’s boot from where he’s tucked himself around the corner. I open the door, walking out and then closing it behind me. The evening is strangely warm where I expected a chill and the balcony is protected from the wind whipping around the other side of the house. I turn and look down at Levi sat on the floor, back up against the wall.

"You look slightly less dead inside than earlier…" I slide down to sit next to him, glancing over. "Which is nice." I smile and he chuckles.

"Well, I appreciate your concern Ackerman..." He takes a drag of a cigarette I only just noticed. 

"I’ve never seen you smoke before…" I was curious, from all the time I’ve spent with him to this point; it’s a habit I thought I would have noticed. I pride myself on being a relatively observant individual. Levi glances over to me then back to the cigarette resting lazily between his fingers.

"It’s getting really hard to find ones that haven’t gone to shit by this point…" He takes another drag, blowing it in the other direction before looking at me again. It wasn’t a habit I particularly approved of but it somehow looked right on him. "…when I left the prison with Erwin and Hange I grabbed a load, along with a gun and… other important shit. I got through those packs in about four days…" I give him a rather stern expression. "…It was a very stressful time Ackerman; don’t give me those judgy eyes…"

"I wasn’t-!"

"I know you well enough by now to _know_ when you don’t approve of something Mikasa…" He takes another drag as if to prove a point.

"So you’ve been on withdrawals all this time…" I giggle quietly. "… No wonder you’re so _grumpy_." He scowls at me, but it has no menace in it what so ever. "Besides, if the nicotine helps you deal with the end of the world…" I look him in the eye. "…then who am I to judge." He chuckles lightly and adjusts himself beside me. He leans his arm back against the wall and we’re close enough that it brushes against my own, the heat from his body seeping into mine. I close my eyes for a moment and thank the Gods I don’t have my brother’s blushing habits. Levi puts his head back and sighs into the night atmosphere, the smell of smoke drifting around us. I don’t hate the smell, but it reminds me of home in a way, since dad smoked, and I feel like that should have been a comfort, except it wasn’t. I know if it had been anyone else beside me, I would have leant over and put the cigarette out myself by now.

"It bothers you…" Levi looks at me and says it as a statement, not asking me a question.

"No… it’s _fine-_ "

"I can tell it does…but I wanna hear you say it-"

"It doesn’t, I said its fine-!"

"No, you’re lying-"

"You don’t have to put it out just because it bothers me-!"

"I never said I would, I just wanted to know if it did-" He shrugs.

"Uuuurgh!"

"Is that a yes…?"

"No…!"

"Mikasa…"

"Fine! Yes! It bothers me-!" I look over to him, watching a small smile spread over his lips and then he promptly puts out the half-finished cigarette, flicking it over the railing.

"You didn’t have to do that-" He chuckles again and his voice comes out quiet in the darkness.

"Yeah… I know…"

We sit in a comfortable silence for a while, the sounds of birds and distant wildlife filling the pockets of peace. We both managed to get a couple hours sleep so it must be getting on for three in the morning. I think about Eren, the mission was officially only a couple days but the camp knew we might have to go on for longer, but that won’t stop people from worrying. And after everything that happened today, I wouldn’t really be able to blame them.

I turn my head to glance at Levi with his eyes closed and I take the opportunity to admire his profile. I can tell he’s clenching his jaw slightly, making the sharp line stick out more than usual and the temptation to run my finger along it is stronger than I’d care to admit. My eyes travel up and take in his dark hair, the front ends falling gracefully into his eyes. He needs to trim his hair… I could do it when we get back… No Mikasa, that is not your responsibility! I’m sure Levi wouldn’t appreciate you acting like a controlling girlfriend, not that Levi would every think of me like a girlfriend, that’s stupid…

Oh my God Mikasa focus on something else…

I avert my eyes and notice the tattoo on the side of Levi’s neck; I remember I noticing it in the first week and I thought it looked like a spider. Now that I’m sitting closer I can see that, no, it’s not a spider, the things I thought could be legs jutting out like wings. It’s in a relatively loose style, giving them this almost foreboding look. Two wings over lapping each other like a shield. I frown a little bit, trying to think about what it could be for…

"You know, I’d tell you to take a picture, but technologies really not there anymore…" I flick my eyes back up and catch Levi staring back at me, his eyebrow raised. I knew immediately, if it wasn’t dark out here, the blush creeping up my neck would give my brother a run for his money.

"I was j-just thinking how you needed a haircut…" Levi doesn’t look convinced by my excuse, but runs a hand through his hair nonetheless, then up the back where it’s shaved underneath.

"Yeah, you’re probably right…" He sighs then looks over at me. "…you any good with a pair of scissors…" My stomach flip flops and I smile, shrugging at his question.

"I mean, I’d give it a good go, but I’m no hair dresser…" He smirks at that and then his face takes on a more thoughtful look.

"Speaking of…" He adjusts himself again, sitting up straighter, our shoulders leaning against each other’s. "…what _did_ you do…" He gestures nonchalantly. "… pre-apocalypse?" I turn my head to take in his questioning gaze.

"I’ll tell you what _I_ did, if you tell me what _you_ did…?" I smile and raise my eyebrows in a challenge.

"Touché…" The corners of his lips smirk up but he looks away.

"I am kidding though, you don’t have to tell me anything… but I _was_ thinking…" I can feel Levi turn to look at me again, but I keep my eyes forward. "After everything that happened today… with Reiner and…" I sigh. "…I feel like I still don’t really _know_ anything about you." I rub the back of my neck and glance at him, expecting to see an annoyed expression but he just looks… amused?

"Well, like what?"

"Like… Ugggh, I don’t know, everyone else seems to know something about who you were, who Rivaille was…"

"Why do you need to know who I _was_ …?" I roll my eyes.

"Okay, yeah, I get it, who you were doesn’t matter and all that… the world’s changed and people change with it and, don’t get me wrong, I like this Levi _very much_ …" I can tell he’s about to make some kind of comment on that… "Shut up and let me finish! But I feel like who you _were,_ is a massive part of who you are now and…" I look him in the eye again. "… I’ve asked people, and no one seems to know much about you at all, but I want to-"

"What do you wanna know?" He shrugs like it was the easiest question in the world.

" _Anything_ …all of it…?" Levi raises an eyebrow.

"That’s a lot of things."

"You know what I mean Levi! Anything, whatever you’ll _tell_ me…" He seems to take a moment to gather his thoughts before shifting his body so he can face me better.

"Okay, well, first of all Mikasa…" He holds my eyes with his and I can see the greys swirling in what little light we have. "If you wanted to know something about me, you probably should have tried asking me rather than one of the many distant acquaintances of mine around the camp." I look down, feeling slightly guilty, because he was right. I feel his fingers graze under my chin so I look back up at him. "I’m not saying that to be a dick, but because whatever you wanted to know…" He shrugs again. "…I probably would have told you, maybe not so much at the beginning but, I didn’t know you then like I do now." He removes his fingers and I move my legs up, wrapping my arms around them. I keep my head to the side, not losing eye contact with Levi and lean it against the back wall.

"That’s fair enough."

"I’ve never consciously kept anything from you and I’ve never not _answered_ a question, because you’ve never really asked me anything…" I nod my head and flit my eyes to the side, overwhelmingly aware of how close we are. "So ask me now…" I look back at him, so many things already pouring into my head.

"Anything…?" I lift an eyebrow.

"Anything…within reason, I’ll give you any question and I promise I will answer it honestly." I have to think about it for a moment. "But I swear to God Ackerman, if you just ask me my favourite colour or some shit…" He points into the darkness without looking. "…I will walk off of this fucking balcony." I laugh at that.

"Well, now I just _really_ wanna know…" Levi gives me a stern look and I glance down, knowing what I want to ask. "...Your tattoo?"

"Which one?" My eyes involuntarily quickly scan over his body, suddenly very curious as to how many there were. I manoeuvre my own body so that it's angled towards his, sitting on my right leg and leaning my shoulder against the wall. I lean out as if on reflex and run my fingers over the scattered wings down Levi’s neck.

"That one… what does it mean?" My eyes look back up and I remove my hand. Levi seems quite satisfied with my choice of question and reaches up to run his own hand over it, an almost self-conscious reaction. Something almost sad passes through his eyes, but then it’s gone.

"It is a symbol that all of my men have on them, a symbol… that represented their affiliation and their loyalty… to me." He doesn’t look away after answering, waiting to know what I’ll say next.

"… A symbol...? So all of the men who…followed you…" I raise my eyebrows at the loose term; it seems we were still keeping it pretty open in some areas. "…have this on their bodies?" Levi nods. "…Is it always in the same place?" He nods again. "Why wings?" He smiles.

"Because wings represent freedom, and I like to think that I gave my men… and women… the freedom that the average constructs of society could not." I smile at his explanation.

"How many men, and women, followed you?" He frowns for a minute, thinking.

"Maybe a couple hundred across a few states…" Jesus Christ…

"Whoa… so you were like… a really big deal, I thought people were just saying that ‘cause you were kinda scary…" He actually laughs at this.

"People followed…" He sighs. "…my principles and my rules, but I had a small group who were actually with me most of the time." I nod my head.

"Do you know where they are now?" Levi shakes his head slowly, the sad look flashing back across his eyes. I feel bad for bringing it up, but glad he shared it with me. I look down.

"Do you miss them?" 

"I…I’m _worried_ about them?" Levi seems to consider how to phrase it.

"If you’re worried, then why not go look for them?"

"I was going to… a few weeks ago…" Levi turns his body back so it’s facing forwards and looks out into the darkness beyond the railings. "…but it got too complicated."

"How? The camp would have carried on without you, if you’re worried about them; you have every right to try find them. If it was Eren out there somewhere I’d have gone…" Levi seems to think about this, still not looking at me.

"Circumstances just…changed…"

"But… I don’t understand…" I feel confused because Levi didn’t have anything keeping him at camp, if he wanted to leave, he could have just left – it’s not like anyone could have stopped him. "What stopped you from going?" Levi doesn’t say anything but rolls his head to the side so he’s looking at me again. Then his voice comes out quiet.

"The day we brought you back to camp… I was gonna go out again afterwards. We didn’t get the supplies we’d left for, so… it seemed like a good opportunity to convince the others I should leave on my own for a quick in-out run." He leans his head back, looking up at the sky. "…I tried to convince Furlan to let me go back out, just me, but he wasn’t having any of it, 'What if something happens', 'What if you need back up'… I’m pretty sure you were conscious by this point ‘cause you and Hange interrupted our argument." I think back to my first day at camp, and seeing Levi and Furlan in a heated discussion outside Hange’s van.

"Yeah, I remember, I tried to thank you for helping me and Eren… and you were kind of an asshole." Levi smiles at that and nods his head.

"Yeah, sound about right…" I smile fondly as well at the memory, a time that feels years rather than weeks ago.

"But I don’t understand what this has to do with-"

"I was gonna go… I was gonna just go, and not come back. I was gonna go look for my family across state, leaving the camp behind." I’m quiet for a moment, my mind trying to wrap itself around how different things would have been if Levi had left right at the beginning.

"W-why… why didn’t you, you could have gone regardless of what anyone else had said?" My own voice is really quiet, my stomach twisting at the idea.

"I don’t know." And he genuinely seemed to not understand why he didn’t… "I’d already discussed it with Erwin once and he gave me a lot of shit, and I spoke to Hange… she said basically the same thing you did…but I don’t know why I didn’t." We’re both silent, the sound of wind whipping through the trees. "There were a couple other times after that, I was gonna try again but-"

"When!?" He glances at me. I needed to know whether it was before, or after, I got to know him.

"Within the same week, there were a few opportunities on short supply runs where I could have up and left." He takes a deep breath and lets it out as he runs a hand down his face. "Then on the hospital mission…" I sit up straighter. "…the original plan was to have two separate groups, well, one group, and then me. The main group was gonna go through the back, basic procedure whilst I headed around the front of the building, scouting for any external supplies. It was the perfect time because I would be alone, and I knew the group was strong enough to get back on their own. _But_ … because you came and because you were a newbie…" He glances at me. "…Erwin felt it was safer for everyone to stay together…"

The memory of Levi saying the same thing that day echoes through my head…

_‘Nobody walk off on your own! That’s how you die!’_

"I tried to convince Erwin you’d be fine but..." Levi looks over to me and I look away through the railings.

"But I wasn’t…" I totally freaked out, and I don’t know what I would have done if Levi hadn’t been there. "I still don’t understand why Erwin would put me on that mission anyway-"

"He didn’t…" I frown, turning back to Levi. "I did."

"Then, why? You ruined your _own_ plans…"

"Because…" He shrugs. "Furlan was right… camp wasn’t treating you so good, you didn’t fit in…" His eyes land back on me. "…much like myself, so I had you go on the mission. I got restless at camp, too many people, and I missed the movement of survival. I thought perhaps you would be suited better for that environment as well. Find somewhere you fit in…and I think after your initial… blip… I was right. I mean…" Levi gestures around lazily. "…look what you managed today-?"

"I froze today…" I can’t quite look him in the eye, thinking back to my own actions that could have gotten people hurt.

"That had nothing to do with survival… that was… different…"

"It was selfish-"

"You were scared-"

"Why didn’t you try again after that… after the hospital mission?" Levi sighs once more.

"I thought about it for a while, I still worried about them, but, over time…" I can feel his eyes on me and I look up. "…I figured, sometimes the best way to find something, is to _not_ go looking for it at all… if it’s supposed to happen, then it’ll eventually come to me." I look up at the sky for a second then adjust my position back to how I was before, back against the wall, legs up, with my arms wrapped around my knees. I shuffle over so my right side is flush with Levi’s, the warmth from his body grounding me back to the present. I take a deep breath and turn to look at him, his eyes already on mine.

I think about the people in our camp who look up to Levi, and who have learnt to trust him more than most in this dangerous world. I think about the things Connie told me in the air vent inside the hospital, and the things Sasha said about family. Of the way Hange always has his best interests over anything else, the way Furlan seeks his approval, and Levi giving Furlan that confidence in return. The way the women in camp respect him for what he’s done to protect their families, and the way Eren saw him as a safety net not moments after meeting him.

I think of all these people who have wormed their way into Levi’s life, and all the things he has done for them, without asking for anything in return.

I think deep down, behind the cold exterior, Levi returns all of the feelings he makes others experience…

The gratitude…the safety, the friendship, the concern, the appreciation, the respect, the loyalty, the love…

And the family…

And even though he’s the shady uncle, that’s why I think he stayed…

Because you never turn your back on family…

"No regrets…?" My eyes are watery, slightly overwhelmed by the whole day, and what Levi just told me. He smiles then shakes his head slowly, voice low.

"No… not for a second…"

"Good…" I smile back and rest my head on his shoulder. "…plus… you still need to tell me your favourite colour."

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr - jovialjellyfishreaper - in case you have any questions or just wanna say hi! <3


	13. A Good Cup Of Tea

 (Eren POV)

Three days…

It’s been three days since my sister left on the supply run, and there’s still no sign of them. When they left, we were told they didn’t know how long it would go on for, but that won’t stop me from imagining the worst. Without my sister or Levi here, I’m left to my own lonely devices, and so far I’ve managed to keep out of any trouble, although…

…the day is still young…

I’m sat on top of Hange’s camper van, Levi’s usual spot, but since he’s not here – I will protect the camp! I watch the field function throughout an average day, breakfast was about half an hour ago and Mike is helping Nanaba sort out the dirty dishes. I look over towards the fire pit and see Naomi arguing with Karen, a common occurrence. I stand up and climb down from the van, jumping (not so gracefully) onto the damp grass. I glance around again, looking for someone who could entertain me for a little while, and distract me from the fact my sister still isn’t back.

I’m really bored…

"MR PIXIS!?" I notice the old man walking down the hill towards the lake, so I run to catch up with him. "Whatcha doin’?" Pixis smiles down at me, his moustache smiling with him.

"Well hello Eren, I’m just going down to the water for a bit."

"To do what?"

"Just to contemplate." I frown, looking up again.

"Contemplate what?" Pixis shrugs.

"…Life, circumstances, what we’ll do next…"

"Huh...? What do you think we’ll do next?"

"I don’t know Eren…What do _you_ think we should do next?" He smiles at me and I just shrug.

"I dunno…" We get to the water’s edge and I stand there silently next to the old man for a little while. I’m still bored and I think about saying it out loud, but I’m not sure if that’s rude. Mikasa would probably say it’s rude but that’s never stopped me before. "I’m bored..." I announce it like its some kind of solution to a problem that doesn’t exist.

"You really don’t have much of a filter do you Eren?" I think maybe I made the wrong decision but then he chuckles, his eyes scrunching up in the corners. "Well, why don’t you find someone who needs help with something?" So I do. I leave Mr Pixis to his contemplation, and head back towards the fire pit where Mike is finishing the washing up.

"Hello!" I sit down on the tree stump beside him, and the man just nods his acknowledgment of my unwelcomed presence. "Whatcha doin’?" Mike lifts up the dirty bowl in his hand, gesturing to the water below him. "You need any help?" He shakes his head – that would be a no. I sit on my hands for a minute, looking around the woods behind us and taking in the silent nature.

I really miss Levi and Mikasa…

"I’m bored!" I announce it again; pleading someone will give me something to do to distract me, turns out his wasn’t the place to come. Mike looks up from his work and gives me a disapproving look, then points in the direction of Ravi’s tent. I may be ten, but I understand a dismissal when I see one, so I get up and head towards the medic tent.

"I’M BORED!" I don’t even bother with the small talk for Ravi. I push the door flap aside and look at Ravi sitting on the small cot bed in the corner of the room.

"Hello Eren, good morning to you too." He says it with a smile, obviously already accustomed to my upfront behaviour. I drag my feet over to the other side of the tent and sit beside him, peeking my head over to see what he was doing.

"Watcha doin’?"

"I’m just counting up the number of pain meds we have left…"

"Do you need any help!?" My voice picks up at the opportunity to become useful.

"I appreciate the offer Eren, but I am nearly finished. Why don’t you go see if Mike needs any help?"

"UUUUUUggggh, I’ve already asked Mike and he told me to come here, I just want something to do! I’m so BORED!!!" Ravi puts the meds to the side and sighs.

"Are you bored Eren, or do you just need distracting…" He turns to look down at me. "…it’s okay to be worried about your sister Eren… but I’m sure she’s fine.  A lot of them went on that trip; it was just a long way to travel." I look down at my feet, my voice coming out quiet.

"I just miss them…" I look up at Ravi. "…I don’t like it when they’re gone, everything feels…" I shrug. "…wrong…" I leave Ravi’s tent and head down the far end of camp, spotting Krista sitting next to her mum. I run over, lifting my hand in greeting, Krista’s mum smiling at me in return.

"Hey Krista, you wanna do something, I’m bored?!" She smiles at me, but there’s an apologetic undertone to her expression, the same one Mikasa use to use when she’d have to leave me alone again with mum and dad.

"I’m afraid Krista’s busy at the moment Eren, maybe later." Krista’s mum doesn’t let her answer the question herself, and I know she’s only saying it because I took Krista a little further from camp than I was supposed to last time.

"Oh…uh, well that’s okay, yeah- maybe later then Krista?" I look at her, seeing her smile sadly at me. Great, now my only friend in camp can’t play because her mum thinks I’m a bad influence. I bet if Mikasa was here she could talk to the lady, but if _I_ push I know I’ll just make it worse. I leave the mother and daughter to whatever they were doing and head back to Hange’s van, but then in the distance I see Alice walking away from her family’s tent. "Yo, Alice!?" The girl is a bit younger than me, but she’s nice enough company. I run over to her, raising my arm to get her to stop walking away. I haven’t spent a lot of time with Alice, but her mum seemed to appreciate it when I kept her daughter company.

"Hello Eren." She smiles up at me and I look down, spotting the book in her hand.

"Watcha doin’?" Alice looks down at the book then back to me.

"My mum gave me this book to look at; she said Mr Levi found it for me to read…" She looks to the side for a second, slightly embarrassed. "…I can’t really read _much_ , but the pictures are really pretty."

"That sounds awesome, why don’t I come with you and I can help you read it… i-if you want…" I rub the back of my neck and she smiles, seemingly very enthusiastic about my offer.

"That would be really nice Ere-"

"ALICE!" We both jump at the booming voice of her father, someone I would have happily avoided for the rest of my life – however long that may be. "WHAT DID I SAY ABOUT HANGING AROUND THAT BOY?" Her father marches over towards us, making Alice shrink back.

"Hey!! I haven’t done anything wrong, we were just gonna read a-"

"DON’T YOU TALK TO _ME_ BOY! I’ve watched you today, fucking pestering everybody because your stupid sister and that fucking asshole are still gone." I clench my fists because NO ONE talks about my family like that. "Here’s hoping the walkers got them, camps been a hell of a lot nicer without those freaks…" My body works on autopilot and I run forwards, pushing the older man with everything I have…

Which evidently wasn’t a lot…

"Fuck you old man!!!" My strength did nothing and Alice’s father grabs me by the front of my shirt, his voice lowering to whisper into my face.

"I’d watch your language you little shit, what _would_ your sister think?"

"DAD, STOP!" Alice jumps to her father’s side, grabbing his sleeve to pull him away but the guy pushes her away, causing Alice to fall to the ground. I can hear people starting to realise what’s going on and I think someone is trying to talk to the man whose hand has travelled from my shirt to grab around my neck. My heart is beating so fast in my chest, and all I can hear is the blood running in my ears, but that doesn’t stop me from fighting back.

"Don’t touch her!!" I scratch the skin of the man’s arm, my finger nails drawing blood. "Let ME GO!!!" My breathing is becoming more and more laboured.

"RICHARD, for the love of God, let the kid go!!" I have no idea who says it, but it doesn’t make him let go.

"Listen to me you little shit, you stay away from my daughter you here, I’m not having her-" Before he can finish, someone forces the guy back, loosening the grip around my neck. I fall to the ground, landing on my arm at a weird angle and I think I hit my head. The sounds around me becoming distant and something wet starts trickling down my face.

"Eren…EREN…" Someone nudges my arm gently, encouraging me to roll over. I sit up slowly and notice Ravi bent down, inspecting my head. "Eren, are you okay, I think you hit your head so I want you to stay really still, okay?"

"O-okay…" What happens after that is a bit of a blur. Ravi inspects my head, then I think him and Nanaba walk me to the medic tent so he could stitch up the cut on my forehead. I lay down for a little on the cot inside, several people trying to talk to me.

But I don’t want to talk to anyone…

I just want my sister and Levi to come home…

I leave the medic tent, much to Ravi’s objection, and go to sit back on Hange’s roof. The weather has stayed relatively nice and so I curl up on my side, laying my head on my crumpled up sweater. I usually feel happy and safe in camp, but not today – today I just want my family back…

 

(Levi POV)  


We leave the house shortly after sunrise, ready for the two and a half hour drive back to camp. The drive itself was quiet; no sign of the creatures from yesterday, plus everybody was still pretty knackered due to the frequent night watch shifts. Once we make it back to camp, everything looks the same as we left it, since there is always that nagging feeling in the back of your mind when you leave camp…

Of what could happen whilst you’re gone…

I park the truck behind the others, Furlan getting out of the driver’s side. I look over to Mikasa in the passenger seat, her eyes still closed since she fell asleep on the way here, not that I blame her. I think back to the conversation last night on the balcony, I know I don’t regret sharing anything with her, and I know if she asked me more, I’d tell her anything…

Because it’s nice to have someone like that – for a change.

I sigh, putting the clutch up and opening the door. We parked through the trees over the far eastern side of camp, so people won’t know we’re back until Furlan gives them the message. I walk around the truck and gingerly open the side door, the sounds of the others getting out the back, collecting their things. As soon as the door opens, Mikasa’s head starts to topple out, seemingly in a deeper sleep than I’d anticipated. I jump forwards to stop her from falling out, letting out a chuckle because she looks so harmless – which I know she’d hate if she knew.

"Oi…" I run my fingers gently through her hair, and then give her a light slap to the side of the head. "Nap times over Ackerman…" Her eyes open, foggy from sleep until she sits up abruptly, then she looks over to me and relaxes.

"That was quick…"

"Yeah, you would think that, because you’ve been asleep the whole way." I raise an eyebrow, stepping back to let her get out.

"Sorry…" She smiles, not looking very sorry. We grab our things from under the seats and start walking through the trees, everybody else following behind us. Once we reach the main camp, people have already accumulated, Furlan having informed Erwin of our return.

"Levi!" The man’s voice travels over everyone else’s and I sigh, not ready to have to reiterate the whole ordeal of the past two days. Erwin walks over to us and I make sure I wear my blankest expression, giving the other man nothing. I watch Ravi hastily approach Mikasa who started to head back down towards her and Eren’s tent. "I want an immediate report Levi, the mission went on a bit longer than anticipated, did something go wrong?" I glare up at the dude’s eyebrows, glancing back to Mikasa and Ravi from the corner of my eye.

"Can I have, like, two fucking minutes Erwin…?" I adjust the strap of my bag on my shoulder.

"Levi, I think it would be best to cover anything important whilst it’s still as fresh as possible in your memory." Yeah, I don’t think those memories are going anywhere anytime soon.

"What...!" Mikasa’s voice takes me out of my thoughts, her distress taking up all of my attention before I watch her start running further into camp, Ravi on her heels.

"Did something happen?" I turn back to Erwin, the man clearly getting impatient with my not so cooperative behaviour.

"It was just a slight altercation earlier, but it has been dealt with Levi. Come with me so we can discuss a few things first and then you are free to do whatever you need to do after."

"Free? Fuck you eyebrows!" Hange appears then, spotting the tension building between us both.

"Levi why don’t we both go fill Erwin in and then you can go check on Mikasa, see what happened, okay?" She gives me a smile, but I can sense her earnest underneath. I nod, following the two of them back to Erwin’s tent at the end of camp, walking a couple paces behind them. "Any problems whilst we were away?" Hange looks over to Erwin who has a very pensive expression crossing his face.

"Just a few things I want to cover, not sure how dire they may be, but…" The tall blonde glances back at me. "…a camper spotted someone in the woods yesterday…"

"Someone…doing what…?" I frown, shrugging, not quite getting the severity of the situation.

"They said they saw them whilst they were foraging, the 'outsider', so to speak, immediately fled when they realised they had been spotted…" Okay, yeah that was odd behaviour.

"You think we’re being staked out." Hange chimes in, but Erwin shrugs.

"I don’t know but I think we should, first and foremost, consider the threat this could pose to our camp. If another group has found us without us knowing, it can only mean they don’t _want_ us to know they exist… which means-"

"They don’t wanna play nice…" He looks back at me again.

"I highly doubt it Levi, that’s why I wanted to talk to you, plus we need to find a way to calmly inform people so we know they’re being vigilant in the woods." We reach Erwin’s own set up and Hange and I spend the next half an hour filling Erwin in on the shit storm that was yesterday…

And now we have to deal with whomever the fucks creeping around our woods…

 

(Mikasa POV)  


As soon as I heard about what happened to Eren I ran to Hange’s van where Ravi told me he was waiting. I swear to God I’m gonna kill that egotistical asshole.

"Eren… Eren…" I climb over the top of the ladder to where Eren’s sat, repeating his name when he doesn’t look up right away. "…what happened?" I sit down beside my brother and I can tell he’s hiding the tears streaking down his face so I circle my arms around him, forcing him into a hug. My brother immediately seizes the opportunity, hiding his face in my chest.

"I r-really missed y-you guys…" Eren’s arms circle around my own torso, his fingers clutching onto my back.

"Eren…" My voice is quiet and I glance down to Ravi whose stood, concerned, next to the van. "…he won’t hurt you again Eren, I promise… you should be able to feel safe here." I can feel him nod, head still buried against me.

"Where’s Levi?" I hold him a bit tighter and answer his question.

"He’s probably just filling Erwin in on our mission." Eren’s head pops up at that.

"Did something go wrong, y-you were gone for a long time!?" Worry flashes across my brother’s face but I try to give him a smile, soothing his worries away.

"Nothing we couldn’t handle Eren, it’s fine now… I’m more concerned about that asshole who dared lay a finger on my brother… you should have just walked away Eren…"

"But I couldn’t, he said bad things about you and Levi, I couldn’t let him just-"

"Eren, I understand but…" More tears start running down his cheeks. "…I _do_ understand Eren; it’s hard to walk away sometimes…" I think back to my own experiences, not walking away when I should have.

"Are you mad?" His voice is small in the space between us.

"Of course I’m mad Eren..." I run my thumb over the bandage on his head. "…but not at you, I’m pissed at the man who did _this_ …"

We sit there for a little bit longer, Ravi checking in one more time before heading off back to the medic tent. I watch more and more people accumulate towards the fire pit, lunch not far away now. I see if I can spot Richard, and he stands tall over his own family – I want to know what punishment he has, or will get, for hurting my brother. Hange’s told me before about the problems he’s caused but I didn’t realise Eren would come even remotely into his line of sight. Although, having thought about it now, with a six year old daughter, I should have considered it more since Eren probably just wanted to make friends with her. We get down from the campervan, heading towards the fire pit and I know I'm overly aware of Eren by my side. He would usually run off on his own by now, talking to people and being the little socialite he’s always been, despite everything else, but today - he sticks by my side like his life depends on it.

We walk through the growing crowds of people and I spot Reiner, Annie and Marco walking away from Erwin’s tent, clearly having gone through introductions and whatever Erwin feels is necessary to welcome outsiders. Bertholdt must be in the medic tent still resting, and the others are probably trying to get a bit more sleep.

"Mikasa?" I jump slightly at someone calling my name, and I turn to see Naomi walking towards me, a chocolate bar in her hand. She smiles at me then turns a concerned look to Eren. "How was your trip?" I’m momentarily confused and stunted by her kindness, because last time I checked – she wasn’t my biggest fan.

"Um, it was…okay I guess…" I didn’t really want to get into any details with her.

"Good, I’m glad to hear it…" I can tell she wants to say something else and I remain silent, awaiting her to go on. "… I saw what happened with Richard…" She looks down to Eren and holds out the chocolate bar. "…he was completely out of line and I will make sure he is reprimanded in some way." Eren gingerly accepts the chocolate bar and I nod my thanks before Naomi walks away.

That was weird…

"That was weird…" Eren repeats my own thoughts out loud before opening the chocolate bar. I don’t say anything but choose to accept this new kindness without question, because I’m too tired to do anything otherwise. We head over to find somewhere to sit, over in a quieter corner where I can spot Jean now speaking with Marco, but before we can get there, I glance movement from the corner of my eye. I turn around and see Richard’s wife nudging her husband in our direction, and I don’t know what they want, whether it’s an apology or not, I don’t care, I don’t want it…

"Miss Ackerman, Mikasa, I am so terribly sorry for my husband’s actions earlier…" Linda smiles at me apologetically but I keep my own face completely impassive. I know that it’s in no way Linda’s fault but I want to hear what her asshole of a husband has to say. He shows no sign of co-operating so I choose to take the conversation into my own hands. I step forward, leaving Eren standing alone behind me.

"Look you overgrown petulant son of a bitch…" I step closer still, raising my hand to poke a finger into his chest, trying to keep my voice low. "…I swear to God, if you even think about laying a hand on my brother ever again, I will fucking chop off your dick and feed it to the walkers myself…" My voice is steady as I say it, no argument needed.

Because that’s what would happen, whether people liked it or not…

"Mikasa…" I feel Eren clasp onto my side, gently pulling me back. "Let’s just go…" But I don’t budge, and I see Linda take a step towards me from my other side.

"Mikasa…" I lift a hand up to her, stopping her in her tracks.

"It’s fine Linda…" I say it without losing eye contact with her husband. "Eren, go sit back down…" I know he’s reluctant but I think Naomi manages to coerce him from my side.

"Is that supposed to be scary…" Richard gets in my face, but all I see is a weak little man with no purpose in this camp. "I’m not afraid of you, you little bitch, and maybe you should be more concerned about what your brother’s doing when you’re not around… at this rate, he’s gonna get himself _really_ hurt…" His voice is quiet at the end, the words meant for my ears alone. I know it’s a threat and a very poorly timed one on his behalf. Before I can rationalise my actions in my head, I raise my leg, kicking the man in the shin. Whilst he’s off balance and bends down from the pain, I punch him hard on the side of the face.

"Don’t you DARE threaten my family ever again you piece of shit!" I know we’ve drawn quite a bit of attention now, people unsure on whether they should interfere or not. Most people somewhat surprised by the quiet Asian girl standing up to the six foot man in front of her, and as much as I know I am more than capable of taking care of myself, I keep that bit of information at the forefront of my mind. Even though he obviously wouldn’t be the most competent fighter here, if I let my guard down, I know he could hurt me, a lot.

"Fuck you!" Richard doesn’t back down, taking a confident step towards me and spits the blood out of his mouth, one hand cupping the side of his face.

"Richard!" Linda grabs his side, but she’s swiftly pushed away. I go to take a step back but his hand leaps out before I can, grabbing me by the hair, and yanking me forwards.

"MIKASA!" I hear Eren shout my name from behind me, the tears evident in his voice. I clasp the guy’s horrible beefy hand, scratching my fingernails down it, and that’s when I notice similar scratches already adorning his arm -images of Eren struggling in the same position flashing through my head. Before I can react though, a voice carries across the crowd, stopping people already moving to help.

"WHAT THE HELL IS HAPPENING!?" I recognise Erwin’s voice, but I can’t focus on anything, the fist in my hair sending pain all the way through my body. Even though Erwin manages to stop everybody else, the man in front of me doesn’t let go, his breathing becoming more and more erratic as my fingernails dig in deeper. "RICHARD, LET HER GO!" The obvious order goes over his head, and I let out an involuntary sound of pain - and I hate that I give the asshole the satisfaction. I suddenly sense Eren start moving by my side and he runs right passed me.

"LEVI!?" Eren must have spotted him with Erwin, but I still can’t see what’s going on. At the mention of Levi, the fist in my hair gets tighter and this time I kick outwards, hitting the bastard right in the groin.

"YOU BITCH!" The man lets me go, his hands now going straight to his wounded junk. I take a step back, Jean and Marco steadying me as I do. The world around me spins a little and everyone starts moving, Erwin marches towards Richard, forcing him to his feet - the man not putting up much of a fight anymore. I run a hand over my rather sore scalp and try to slow my heart rate down.

"Hey, you alright." I feel Jean beside me, placing a hand on my shoulder.

"Y-yeah, just… I shouldn’t have said anything to him…" I keep my eyes covered, annoyed at myself. At that point I feel Jean take a step back and somebody else steps in front of me, gently moving my hands away from my face. I look up and see Levi, his eyes searching my face for any sign of pain, and Eren clung to his side. I move my hands to my side and Levi runs his own fingers through my hair, I notice the clench of his jaw, but no other signs of a reaction to what just happened. I look down at Eren and see the tears building back up in his eyes. I feel bad because Eren told me to walk away, the same thing I reprimanded him for not doing only moments before.

"Come one..." Levi takes my hand, leading us in the direction of the medic tent. Once we get inside I notice Ravi on his own, Reiner and Berthold having been taken to a new tent a little while ago.

"Mikasa, are you okay, I just heard what happened, I think Erwin’s going to do something about him this time…it can’t just keep going on like this." Ravi step towards us and I nod in reply, not really feeling like talking. I’m still so tired from yesterday, and I really didn’t need this today. Levi leads me over to the cot and I sit down, Eren sitting down beside me.

"I feel so stupid, I shouldn’t have said anything Eren, I did exactly what I told you not to do…" I cover my face again, tempted to just lie down and go to sleep, but I take a peek in front of me and see Levi kneel down to my level, removing my hands once again.

"It’s easy to forget even your own words or reason when somebody threatens your family Mikasa… you had every right to stand up for your brother." I feel Eren by my side and run my fingers through my hair again, my scalp still sensitive. I look down, still sensing Levi’s eyes on me.

"Why didn’t you do anything?" My question is quiet, voicing something that I didn’t even realise was hurting, because I knew he was stood there, he just didn’t move to help me. I feel Levi tense up in front of me, but then he moves to rest one hand on top of my own, resting on my thigh, his other hand running through his hair. I still don’t look up, worried I’d appear too presumptuous or that I’d see some kind of… rejection?

"Mikasa…" Levi’s voice is low, and I can see him share a look with my brother from the corner of my eye. "…I only didn’t interfere, because I knew you could handle it on your own."

" _Oh o-okay_ …but-"

"If I _had,_ then that asshole would still see you as a target, someone who needed another guy to protect you whenever he was around – and that would have just made him feel more powerful towards you. But by letting you handle it yourself, he now knows that if he messes with you, he’ll get a kick in the shin and a knee to the balls, because you _don’t_ need me…" His words spark something inside me, long awaited tears spilling out, and this just reminds me that I never cried over last night, over everything – because I kept it all inside as usual.

I want to say something but I just shake my head, my tears building up more and more.

"Mikasa…" Eren’s voice is quiet; concerned for me, even though he was the one who was really hurt today.

"Eren…" Ravi’s voice comes from the back, getting my brother’s attention. "Why don’t I check your stitches, leave them to talk?" Eren gets up at that, letting go of my arm and my attention goes back to Levi.

"No, I get it…" I smile a little, wiping the stupid tears away with the back of my hand… but they won’t stop, because it still kind of hurt for some reason.

"Mikasa…" Levi sighs, thinking about what he wants to say. "… Just because you don’t need me now, doesn’t mean I won’t be there when you do… if something ever happens where you _do_ need help, I promise I’ll be the first one there." I look up at him, and he smiles, his grip on my hand tightening. "And you've gotta give a guy a little credit… just standing there was probably one of the hardest things I’ve _ever_ had to do…" He looks off to the side for a second. "…and I did some pretty crazy shit yesterday…" I chuckle at that, feeling slightly less overwhelmed. Now that Levi’s explained why he stayed back, I’m actually grateful, because it means he trusts me and he thinks I’m strong… and if Levi thinks I’m strong, then maybe I don’t give myself enough credit.

"Thank you." He smiles and I hear Eren trudging back to us, his head freshly bandaged. I wipe my face for any more tears and I turn to look at him, Levi glancing up as well.

"Are you okay now?" Eren self-consciously adjusts the bandage on his head and I nod, my stomach twisting when I see the light bruises around his neck. "G-good." He’s quiet for a moment but I sense he has something he wants to say, Eren’s always been the easier one to read in the family. His eye’s travel between mine and Levi’s, then looks down at Levi’s hand over my own… then back to me. I think for a moment he’s upset about it, but then he smiles, more tears appearing in the corner of his eyes.

"Eren…?"

"I-I’m really glad you’re both b-back…" He wipes his nose with the back of his hand. "…I don’t like it when you’re both gone, I don’t feel safe…" And with that, Eren throws his arms around Levi’s neck, burying his face into the side of his shoulder. I laugh lightly at Levi’s face, but he swiftly uses his free hand to stable Eren against him, both of them about the same height with Levi still knelt down.

"Why do people keep _hugging_ me…?" Levi’s voice is flat, his expression slightly perturbed, which makes me laugh more. "…this wasn’t a problematic occurrence _before_ the apocalypse..." Eren seemingly acknowledges what Levi says by hugging him just that bit tighter. I shrug at his question, taking in the two most important people left to me in this world…

"Maybe it’s because you’re just so warm and cuddly…" My voice drips with sarcasm, Levi’s eyebrow rising in perfect timing with my smile.

 

(Mikasa POV)  


During lunch I was worried that some people might think I over-reacted to Richard earlier, but the camp appears to be on my side. Some people send me looks, their faces portraying the obvious pity, but I don’t want their sympathy – I just want my brother to be able to feel safe. We sit with Connie and Sasha, and Levi stays with us whilst we eat, which is a rare occurrence. But once everyone was finished he says he has to leave, checking out a potential problem in the woods with Erwin, so we say our goodbyes, agreeing to meet up later in the evening.

I spend most of the afternoon resting and helping Nanaba prepare the meat in the stew for dinner, since most of the other women aren’t comfortable with plucking the bird Mike caught in the woods. We sit in a comfortable silence, Eren still by my side and I glance at Nanaba, then at the boiling pot of water in front of us. The day is slowly coming to an end, the sun on the verge of setting.

"Nanaba?" The blonde woman looks up at me, eyes as kind as ever, silently telling me to continue. ‘Would it be alright if I used some of the water?’ I gesture to the boiling pot and smile nervously.

"Of course, I don’t see why not… what for?" I start to stand up, taking the flask I found last week on a supply run out of my backpack.

"Uhh, just, um…" I gingerly fill the flask up, careful not to spill any of the boiling liquid onto my hands. "…it’s just for a friend." Nanaba raises an eyebrow quizzically but doesn’t ask any further questions on the matter. I turn to my brother whose quietly chopping up some mushroom on the log next to me. "Eren, are you alright to stay here whilst I go take care of something? I’m sure Nanaba would really appreciate your continued help…" Eren glances up at me and nods, still strangely quieter than usual. "Okay…" I nod my head back, slightly hesitant about leaving him. "…I’ll see you in a bit then." And so I leave, heading back to our tent where I left the rest of my supplies.

I find the loose tea leaves at the bottom of the rugged backpack and open the packet carefully, trying not to spill the contents all over our sleeping bags. I tried to find some kind of small sieve or strainer whilst we were out but I didn’t come across anything remotely like what I was looking for, so I’m gonna have to use a strip of gauze. The small holes in the fibre should work well as a strainer, at least for this make shift apocalypse tea.

I kneel down in the tent, delicately wrapping the tea leaves and waiting for the flavour of the earl grey to diffuse into the hot water. I’ve never been a big tea drinker myself, it’s not that I don’t like it; I just always preferred coffee – and that more immediate caffeine release. Once I’ve decided it’s brewed to an adequate standard I remove the soaked up gauze and put it to the side so I can discard of it later. I don’t have any sugar or anything so here’s hoping Levi likes his tea black.

I bring the flask up to my nose, smelling my make shift tea – it actually smells really nice – like subtle yet powerful citrusy cologne. I put the cap onto the flask and leave the tent, making my way over to Hange’s campervan. When I get there, there’s no sign of Levi and it makes me reconsider it all…

It’s just a friend giving a gift to another friend…

What’s wrong with that?

So I climb up to the roof and walk over to the middle, sitting cross legged with the flask tucked safely into the space between my legs. I wait for a while, the sun now fully setting and I can tell dinner will be soon since I can see more and more people gathering around the fire pit.

I wonder if maybe I should give up and head back to Eren, I didn’t want to leave him too long anyway. Sighing, I look up at the sky and watch my breath rise into the atmosphere, then close my eyes. The cold is starting to set in more and more each day, the thin jacket I have on at the moment only just about keeping me warm enough up on the roof. I open my eyes and keep them on the stars as I feel the hot beverage still tucked between my legs. I find that the colder it gets, the clearer the night sky becomes – the stars becoming brighter and brighter, looking down on the fucked up mess our planet has become.  

I exhale gently into the sky once more, watching my breath burst into a small condescend cloud…

"It’s getting bloody cold up here you know, we should probably find you a scarf or something…" I jump at the sound of Levi’s voice, and then turn my head to take in his bare arms.

"You say that but how are _you_ not freezing, walking around in a fucking T-shirt all day?" I watch him make his way across the roof to sit next to me.

"It’s because I am warm blooded and I refuse to be controlled by your pathetic human climates…" He smiles as he turns to me, taking the various weapons out of his belt so he can sit comfortably.

"I _suspected_ you weren’t human…" I raise an eyebrow at him and circle my hands sub-consciously around the flask. "…but I can’t say I would have put my money on _Lizard Man_ …" I shrug nonchalantly and hear Levi chuckle beside me.

"Yeah, you think you know a guy…" I can’t tell whether his comment is a jab at our conversation from last night, considering there’s still a lot I _don’t_ know about him.

We sit in a comfortable silence for a few minutes until Levi breaks it, his attention up at the sky.

"You know, you didn’t have to wait up here…" He looks at me, leaning back on his hands. "… I know I spent more time out in the woods with Erwin than I’d planned, you should have just stayed with the others." I shrug lightly but shake my head.

"It’s fine, I didn’t mind waiting… its quiet up here anyway, and it’s nice." I look back at him. "Is there going to be a problem, in the woods I mean?" He doesn’t look overly concerned but I’ve learnt that there could be pretty much any emotion going on behind those eyes, and I wouldn’t know about it.

"We don’t really know yet…but… best stay vigilant whilst you go out there anyway."

"Why, what’s out there, walkers?"

"No, much worse…" He runs a hand through his hair. "…people…" People? How could that be worse…unless, they’re bad people, then yeah, I suppose that could be a lot worse. I just want a day or two of peace and quiet, no imminent threats or lives at risk.

Why does it have to be one stupid thing after another…?

I absent-mindedly run my finger over the top of the flask, my mind racing…

"We should probably head down, Hange wanted to talk to me and I told her I’d find her before dinner." I can sense Levi beginning to stand from his spot on the roof and I squeeze the flask lid.

This was a stupid idea anyway…

Before my mind talks me out of it, I turn around, grabbing Levi’s wrist before he can start heading down the ladder.

"Wait!" My voice is still quite quiet between us but my fingers are strong. He looks back at me,a small slither of concern crossing his face and I let his hand go. My heart jumps in my chest and my mind immediately backtracks on my body’s actions.

It’s just tea...

It doesn’t have to mean anything…

God I feel so stupid…!

I look back up again and I know he’s waiting for me to say something, but I just shake my head lightly.

"Uh, actually… i-it doesn’t matter…" I try smiling at him and look back down at my hands, my fingers wrapping around the hot metal in my lap. I feel my stomach drop as I hear him start to move again and I realise how pathetic I’m being. As the roof creaks gently under his weight, I assume Levi’s about to leave, but then I feel his body sit back down beside mine and I look up…

"It kinda looked like it mattered to me…" I rub the back of my neck with my hand, the heat from the flask making my palm warm to the touch. "Are you alright…?" His voice lowers when I don’t look up at him, and I can tell he must be finding my behaviour rather odd. I nod my head to answer his question.

"No, yeah, I’m fine, really – it’s nothing…"

"You sure, ‘cause I’m _thinking_ it’s something…" I see him glance down at my lap where my fingers are clenched around the flask. "…has it got something to do with the flask your holding onto for dear life?" His tone is slightly teasing, but I can sense a slight unease when I don’t answer right away again.

I sigh, close my eyes and lift the flask out of my lap - holding it out in his general direction.

"It’s for you…" I say it quietly, like an embarrassed child passing a note to her crush in the playground. My eyes are still closed when I eventually feel Levi take the offering out of my hand. I turn to look at him and he seems somewhat confused, raising his eyebrows at me.

"Why di-"

"It’s tea! I found some at the shopping village because you said that you _missed tea_ , well a good cup of tea anyway – which I don’t know if that clarifies as or not because I haven’t actually tried it. I couldn’t find a diffuser or anything though so I had to get creative but I hope it’s okay. Plus we don’t have any sugar or anything so I hope you like your tea black…" I knew that I was rambling and absently rub the back of my neck again, my eyes not quite meeting Levi’s.

"You made me tea…?" His voice holds a slight tinge of disbelief, as if no one had ever _made_ him tea before. I finally look at him, his eyes widened slightly and eyebrows still raised in surprise. I can feel my face heating up and I look down again.

"Yeah…" I shrug. I can hear him twist the cap off the flask, my mind hoping it’s not the shittiest cup of tea in the world. There’s a moment of silence as he tries it…

"That’s actually pretty damn good…" He chuckles after he says it, which makes me look up.

"You’re not just saying that…? I wasn’t really sure if I’d brewed it properly and I don’t even _know_ what Earl Grey _tastes_ like… it was the only one I could grab before I was forced out of the shop by the undead." Levi smiles at my explanation, looking me dead in the eye.

"It’s the best fucking cup of tea I’ve ever had… and I promise Mikasa, if it was shit I would have told you…" I laugh at his attempt at reassurance, and then glance down at the flask as he takes another sip.

"It smelt really nice when I made it…" I was curious as to what it tasted like, wanting to experience everything that Levi loved. "…what does it taste like?" He looks over to me and adjusts his body.

"You wanna taste it?" I nod my head gingerly and watch as Levi takes another sip from the flask. I think he’s going to then hand it to me, but I feel his hand cup the side of my face, and then his lips are on mine.

My heart stops for a moment, everything around us freezing as I taste the citrus of the tea, a bitterness to the flavour, and then Levi. The combination filling my mouth, and my head… and my everything… I know it’s not a long kiss at all, but it feels like it made time slow down.

When Levi pulls away slightly I open my eyes, and he rests his forehead against mine. I can still taste the bitter citrus on my bottom lip as I bite it softly in between my teeth. Neither of us move, our faces still so close as I look up into his eyes.

"Wow…" My voice is almost non-existent in the space between us. "That really is a good cup of tea…" Levi chuckles, his thumb gently running over my cheek.

"I told you…" He finally removes his hand, sitting back into his original position. "…best fucking cup of tea I’ve ever had."

If that’s what drinking tea is like…

…then fuck coffee…

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello guys!!! Thank you all so much for your continued support! I love reading your comments and knowing you're still enjoying it keeps this story going <333 
> 
> I wasn't overly sure about this chapter when I uploaded it since it was a bit of a filler, covering some lower plot points I'd built up in the background. We're in that part of the story where I need to start building up to the next big plot point so hope you all enjoyed this chapter none the less!!! 
> 
> Also i wanted to run something past you guys, I was thinking about having a chapter which covered the first day of the outbreak which would go back in time, looking at both Levi and Mikasa's experience on the first day. (Mikasa at home and Levi in prison) It would just kind of answer a few questions and give some insight into other people's relationships before the outbreak- Let me know if you guys would like to read about this or not <333 Thanks again - love you all !!!


	14. Day One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Flashback to Day One

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoo flashback!! You guys said you'd love to hear about it so I have delivered !<3! 
> 
> It ended up being a lot longer than I'd originally planned so there will probs be a couple chapters (the second of which is already half written). It switches between both Levi and Mikasa's experiences of the first day of the outbreak, both taking place on the same day but at different time of that day. They're also both paced a bit differently but that kind of comes down to the very different environments they're in :D  
> Cool, anyway - REaaaally hope you like it, it was a bit different and out of the flow from what I have been writing and I got a bit confused when I was editing it since I wrote the story lines separately then organised them into the order you see before you - so I really hope it works and makes sense XD  
> I'll shut up now..  
> Thank you all so much for your continued support, some of you commenting since the beginning! TWT All you guys are amazing and I'm so happy you enjoy it !!! <3333

(Approximately three months before present day)

(Levi POV)

"B block, ten more minutes yard time then back in for count!!" The over-weight guard who pretends to emit some semblance of authority heads back inside the main food hall, leaving four guards left to watch the dirt field.

I’m sat alone on top of a bench, my heavy combat boots resting on the graffiti littered surface and my attention on the crappy copy of 'The Great Gatsby' in front of me.

You don’t make friends in prison, and besides…

Books are better company than people…

"Yo Levi!" I glance up at the group of guys sauntering towards me, about five of them, all sporting the same tacky ass tattoos. "Is it all good…?" I don’t say anything for a minute, glaring at the men who have interrupted one of my few moments of peace away from my cell mate. I set my book down on the bench and jump to the ground, landing gracefully in front of their leader – calls himself 'Knuckles', but I’m pretty sure his real name is Chad something… something  - I don’t fucking remember. I look down at his inked up knuckles – I imagine the source of the nickname.

"I’m doing very good, thanks for asking…" I knew this wasn’t what he meant, but it’s always fun to dick around with them. I can see the doubt flicker through the larger man’s eyes on whether he should correct me or not.

"Y-you know what I meant man, did they agree to the terms you set." I sigh and take a step forward, making the smaller stragglers of the group take a step back.

Jesus I don’t _bite_ …

"Yeah, they won’t be bothering you on the East side as long as you deliver the crates by the set date." I cross my arms and watch Knuckles nod his head slowly.

"Good… you did us a solid; you’re really a man of your word Rivaille." You don’t have to sound so surprised…

"Da fuck you readin' a book for?" I turn to look at a scrawny white man who sneers down at my discarded paperback.

"Parce que je ne suis pas un dipshit analphabète comme toi." The guy looks thoroughly confused, insulting people is no fun when they don’t understand – I sigh. "I said...because I’m not some illiterate dipshit like you." I raise an eyebrow and turn back to the gang leader.

"Da fuck you call me, you fuckin' frog midg-" Before the asshole can finish insulting me Chad puts an arm out, swiftly shutting him up.

"I apologise for Smuggie…" Smuggie, are these guys for real? "…he seems to have some kind of _death_ wish today." Knuckles stresses the 'death' when looking back at his smuggler, making the smaller man pale. I don’t say anything else, more than ready to move on from this hassle of a conversation. "Thanks again Rivaille." The guy regards me once more before gesturing towards his men to move on, but I shout out, stopping them all in their tracks.

"Hey!" I wait a second before turning around, watching the men try figure out what went wrong in the transaction, Knuckles looking slightly concerned at my sudden change of tone. The men all pause and stand in a more defensive position. Jesus, I don’t want to fight them, I just wanna get fucking _paid_. "I can’t smoke your _fucking_ gratitude!" 

He immediately relaxes; gesturing for his men to stand down and pulls a pack of cigarettes out of his pocket, lobbing them in my direction. I catch the pack with ease and turn back to the bench, giving no further acknowledgment of the interaction - I’ve been paid, those piss heads aren’t my problem anymore.

I sit back down for the last few precious minutes I have outside, taking in the sun and the slight breeze that brings with it some semblance of freedom. I’ve been locked up for two years now, a fraction of my sentence and I’ve made sure not to affiliate myself with anyone beyond being a middle man. Gang leaders come to _me_ so _I_ can talk to _other_ gang leaders, and for my services they pay me with the shit I need – usually cigarettes – I’m a man of few wants.

I’m only one man, but I represent so many that no one bothers me. No one wants to piss off the S Legion, so I pay my dos in peace. I close my eyes for a moment and hear the buzzer go off, signalling the end of B block’s yard time. I slide off the bench, picking up my book and make my way towards the food hall.

"YARD TIMES UP, BACK TO YOUR BLOCK AND LINE UP FOR COUNT!" I walk passed the guard and into the centre hall, looking up I can see the next two floors, wall to wall covered with cells. I make my way to the second floor, various inmates moving out of my way out of courtesy… or fear – I don’t care as long as they move. I stand outside my cell, watching the men around me do the same, each stood outside like clockwork, waiting to be searched and counted.

"Pssst, Levi…Levi!" I ignore my cell mate, a young naïve _boy_ who obviously got caught up with shit he couldn’t handle. "Come on man…you gotta-"

"The fuck do you want Randle…?" I say it harsher than I intended, the kid's just that… a kid.

"S-sorry Levi, I- I just wanted to know if you’ve managed to talk to…" I stop listening as I let my eyes follow the guards across the levels below, my pulse raising slightly as I catch sight of Erwin and his smug fucking smile as he hauls one poor sod off to solitary. "…so if you think that you could tell him I won’t snitch, I fuckin’ _swear_ man-"

"Yeah yeah, Randle - shut up…" The kid immediately goes quiet, not appearing to have noticed that I zoned him out. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I tolerate Randle more than I do most, but he’s been stuck to my bloody side since his first day when I stopped three inmates from chopping his dick off in the showers – and I only did that because they were in my way – plus it was completely unhygienic. "Blake won’t get you for the snitch rumours if you bring him three cases by tomorrow afternoon." I don’t take my eyes off of the approaching guards.

"Three cases, h-how am I supposed to do that by tomorrow!?" Randle tries to keep his voice low but his panic makes it crack through the block and I turn to glare at him.

"I don’t _fucking_ know Randle, that’s you’re problem not mine – I negotiated the hard part and got you out of a more immediate bloody end…" I keep my own voice at a whisper and watch Randle as he realises he was starting to push his luck - he gets more shit from me than most in here. "…you got yourself into this mess, so get yourself out of it. I’m not your fucking babysitter and you’re not my problem." I stand back up straight as I hear the guards approaching our level.

"S-sorry Levi." The kid doesn’t look at me again and shrinks back into his corner of the cell door.

Fuuuuck _sake_ …

Randle was put in my cell about three months ago as it was believed he wouldn’t cause trouble. The prison originally didn’t think it would be a good idea to give me a roommate and put me in a small box with another human being. However, once I’d shown them that I wasn’t some untameable animal like the media portrayed me as, I was _allowed_ Randle, who of which was more than aware of who I was and displayed what I can only described as a rather unfavourable form of hero worship.

I decide to let Randle sweat it out in the corner since Erwin makes his way towards our cell. The inmates within the vicinity watch with eager eyes as he approaches me, everyone having heard about, and evidently _seen_ , the shiner I gave him last week. It got me twenty-four hours in solitary…

But it was worth it…

"Levi…" Eyebrows looks down at me, smirks, then turns his attention to Randle. "Parker..." He nods his head into the cell, gesturing for the guards behind him to go inside. "Search the cell." Whilst they do that Erwin turns back to face me, looking down at the book in my hand.  "What is in your hands inmate?" I raise the book and lift an eyebrow condescendingly.

"A book…" Erwin clenches his jaw at my tone and snatches it out of my hand, the pages crumpling slightly in his grip. "Careful…!" He looks up as I snap at him and I change my expression to one of complete mock sincerity. "…it’s a classic." The larger man scowls at me, shoving the book back into my chest. The guards come out of the cell, assuring Erwin that nothing was out of place so he nods his head, probably somewhat disappointed they didn’t have anything he could give me shit for and addresses me once more before moving onto the next cell.

"Levi, after count you need to go to Lewis so he can escort you over to psychiatric - Miss Zoe wants to see you."

God damn it…

Can a man have no peace…?

 

"LEVI!" The shrill call of my name echoes down the shitty lit corridor as I’m led towards Hange’s office, my limbs buckled and in chains. "Are they really necessary?!" Hange looks down at the shackles around my wrists and frowns at the guard behind me.

"Inmate 4836 was in correction for a physical altercation with a staff member last week and has been put back on close watch until Erwin Smith says otherwise." Hange doesn’t stop frowning and turns it onto me.

"Oh Levi, you do make things so hard for yourself." She puts her hands on her hips and shakes her head. "Well, come on in!" I’m led into Hange’s office and I sit down opposite her own chair, where she quickly picks up a notebook and pen. "Oh, do you think you could wait outside?" She gestures to the door, waiting for the apprehensive guard to close the door behind him. "Right…" Hange adjusts herself and looks at me expectantly. "…what happened?"

Does she ever stop fucking smiling?

"What?"

"What happened, what did you do to be put on a close watch by Erwin?" I don’t say anything for a couple minutes, but the psychiatrist is one of the most persistent and patient people I’ve ever met.

Sigh...

"I clocked the bastard in the face last week and for some reason…" I shrug. "…he didn’t take it too well."

"What!?" Hange leans forward, dumping her notebook on the desk. " _You_ gave Erwin that shiner; he told me it was an altercation at a bar or something – not from an inmate!" The fact that Erwin was too…proud?…embarrassed? …to admit what fucking happened makes me both angry and kinda smug at the same time. Hange seems to take in the information, no doubt storing it to confront Erwin with later on, and composes herself, moving swiftly on. "Well, anyway, regardless of that little mishap, how have you been Levi – Well--?"

Seriously?

I don’t say anything.

"--Okay, well, I noticed you took another book out of the library, Great Gatsby…?" Silence "…well I _love_ that book, have you got to the part where Tom confronts Gatsby about Daisy when they go to New York?"

"Fucking spoilers Hange…" I didn’t actually really give a shit and my tone of voice would have told anyone else that very fact.

"Oh no! Sorry Levi, I thought maybe you’d have gotten-"

"Hange…" I run a shackled hand down my face. "…I really don’t care." My tone still doesn’t change from one of complete boredom.

"Oh… oh well…" She laughs it off. "…I mean but really, what’s Tom got to be angry about anyway, he’s got his little affair on the side – talking about the pot calling the kettle black am I right…?"

"Did you want to see me for any particular reason beyond this sad interpretation of a shitty book club?" Hange sits back, picking up her notebook.

"Actually Yes!!! I wanted to talk to you about-"

And then I’m pretty sure I zoned her out as well…

 

(Earlier that same day -Further North up the country)

(Mikasa POV)  


"This traffic is absolutely crazy…" I sigh and decide to turn the engine off, turning to Mina in the passenger seat.

"I’m not gonna get back to Shiganshina before nightfall at this rate." I sit back in the chair, my friend nodding her agreement.

"Maybe…" She shrugs. "…maybe it’ll start moving soon."

Mina and I decided to take a trip home after the commotion on the news started getting more and more prevalent. It started off with just a few cases across the country, news reports so small that you didn’t really pay that much attention, just, let it sink in for a short moment, then move on with your day. But then the stories became bigger and closer to home. Reports started putting out warnings, staying away from certain areas, locking your doors at night…

Although, who doesn’t lock their doors at night anyway, I don’t know…?

"Look, the next lanes moving so, maybe the traffic’s thinning out ahead…could be an accident or something…" I watch a few cars slowly trail along beside us, their lane moving at a snail’s pace, but still faster than ours. "Was work cool with you taking off like this?" I sigh and pat nervously on the steering wheel.

"They were pretty understanding, I wasn’t the only one concerned for people back home so…" I shrug. "…left them a bit short staffed though." I felt a bit bad to be honest but my brother comes first.

"You tried calling again, my phones completely dead?"

"Yeah, the lines are all jammed, nothing’s going through – won’t even ring now."

I moved away to Trost after I graduated, reluctant to leave my brother behind, but I had to get out of the house. Once we packed up the few bits we needed, Mina and I set off first thing this morning and it’s taken us almost five hours to do what should have been a relatively quick journey back to our home town. Roads all along the state are jammed, bumper to bumper, and the phone lines have all been busy since last night- everyone else clearly thinking along the same lines…

Get help, and get out…

But where everyone’s seemingly going, I have no idea…

"Maybe we should stop off at the next town, take the next exit…?" Mina looks over at me but I can’t help but feel uneasy, wanting to get to my brother as soon as I can.

The news showed incidents of people going 'crazy', attacking other people on the streets and causing a spread of this 'mass hysteria' as they called it. These were based at the beginning around a few contained incidents, but now, nowhere seems to be safe from whatever the hell is going on. We sit at a complete stand still for about twenty more minutes until there’s any movement. I quickly turn the engine back on and ease us forwards; careful to not bump the car in front of me considering the inconsistent pace we’re now moving at.

"Yeah… that’s probably a good idea…" I notice all of the cars along the highway slowly pulling into one lane – it must be an accident – so I indicate and wait my turn, a nice older woman eventually letting us pull in front of her.

"What do you thinks happened?"

"I don’t know Mina, probably just some collision or something…" I check my watch and see that its gone passed lunch. "…We’ll stop in the next town, pick up some food, stretch out our legs and get back on the road within the hour, ‘kay?"

"Yeah sounds good, I need to be back at my dad’s before he decides to up and leave to Aunt May’s, he’s getting pretty paranoid about the whole thing." Mina has a lot more of a layed back attitude about the whole ordeal, she was somewhat reluctant to come back in the first place and leave her boyfriend back in Trost, but she said she’d come to keep me company on the drive home.

"He gonna take your brother and sister up there too?"

"Yeah, he thinks it’ll be safer since it’s a lot more isolated, which is stupid really…" She looks out of the window as we start coming up to the accident site, police standing along the barricade, waving the vehicles to keep pressing by. "Jesus, some serious damage was done to those cars." I take my eyes off the road for a second to glance at the scattering of metal debris across the closed lane. Once we reach the accident itself there are make shift tents covering most of the scene, three cars crumpled beyond repair and what I can only assume must be blood splattering the tarmac – the police having tried their best to cover most of it with tarping.

"Some serious shit went down here Mika…" My friend doesn’t take her eyes off of the scene as we slowly drive passed, my own stomach dropping at the reality of the situation. It’s one thing to read and watch about it all on the news, but when you actually go outside and see it happening…

It feels a whole lot different, everything’s always easier to handle when it seems like its somebody else’s problem – no matter how much compassion we felt at the beginning…

Once we get passed the initial site the traffic speeds up marginally as it seeps back into the four lanes, now we just have to make our way out to the next junction turning. I start feeling nauseous, my leg bouncing up and down as I try to calm my nerves.

"It’s gonna be alright Mika, you know that…" I turn to look at my friend and smile faintly. "…your brother’s gonna be fine and then once you get there you can decide what you want to do."

"I know but…" I sigh, running a hand through my hair. "…I just know my dad’s gonna be stubborn about it, he’s gonna be difficult about the whole thing if I try and get them to leave."

"Surely they can see the extenuating circumstances, their neighbours and stuff must be leaving and I’m sure they’ve seen stuff on the news."

"Probably but that’s not gonna stop him from being a complete asshole about the whole thing, when I tried to take Eren away before he got so _angry_ and… well you know how that worked out. I’ve always hated leaving him there but I didn’t have much of a choice, and I couldn’t stay there." I feel Mina put a supportive hand on my knee, stopping it from nervously bouncing up and down.

"It will be fine Mikasa and if your parents don’t understand then…" She shrugs. "…you’ll just have to grab Eren and run…" she giggles, looking back outside as our exit slowly comes into view. "…ooh, up here…!" I indicate, waiting for several cars to let me through so I can pull off of the highway and up towards the nearest town. We have to queue for about half an hour more through the high street until we’re able to find somewhere to park outside a busy supermarket. "Wow, you’d think it was the fucking apocalypse or something the way these people are stocking up." Mina gets out the car, stretching her neglected limps.

"People are worried, use a few triggering words on the news and people will take all the precautions they feel they need to take." I get out and lock the car behind me. "We probably shouldn’t stick around here for too long…" I’m interrupted as a couple of police cars and an ambulance go passed, filling the town with painful white noise. "…it’s getting a bit crazy around here and we’re not too far from Shiganshina now."

We start walking towards the supermarket, people running in and out with varying amounts of food in tow. As soon as we go inside we realise that things have fallen apart more than we’d originally thought, no one was serving, everyone was panicking… I look over at Mina whose eyes have widened, legitimate concern falling over her face for the first time since we left Trost.

"This is crazy." She whispers it; someone shoving passed her as they get out the door. "W-what the fuck is happening to people." I don’t answer her question and grab her arm, pulling her towards the food aisles.

"Come on, let’s just get what we need and get out." Mina goes quiet, a strange occurrence since I’m the quiet one in this friendship and she follows me, clinging to my arm. I manage to barge through a blur of people, no one really paying us any mind at all, everyone too caught up in their own fields of anxiety.

We grab a few pieces of food out of necessity, the choices thinning by the second, and some bottles of water. The rush of people around us makes it difficult to think, bodies running back and forth and constant arguments ensuing about who picked up what food first. Mina walked off to find something that could help keep us going for the last part of our journey so I head to the back, looking for some pain meds that might tackle the building headache at the back of my skull.

"HEY LADY, GET OFF!" I immediately recognise the voice as Mina’s and run around the corner, pushing through the wall of people surrounding the bread aisle – why do people always panic buy bread?

"Mina!?" I stop and try to spot her in the crowd, my eyes zoning in on two people fighting over a pack of energy bars.

"Get off, I found them first!" Mina shoves her body around, turning her back to the older women, using the momentum to try force the box out of the other lady’s grasp. "Mika…hey watch it!!" The slightly erratic looking women steps on Mina’s foot, forcing her to lose her balance. I jump forwards and stop my friend from falling to the food coated floor.

"What the hell Mina…?" With the distraction of my involvement Mina pulls the bars out of the unsuspecting woman’s hands, making her shout and swear.

"Those were fucking mine you bitch!" I step back and watch Mina hold her reward away at a safe distance.

"Bullshit, I had them first and you clearly knew that!" The pissed off lady steps forwards and goes to grab my friend, but I step in between them, forcing the much larger lady against the aisle wall – a few eyes travelling in our direction but not enough to cause alarm.

"Just keep walking lady, find something else…" I say it calmly but keep a tight grip on her, a silent threat if she were to go after my friend again. I can see the temptation to continue fighting in her eyes but the she nods, her muscles going limp.

"Fine…" I let her go and take a step back as she spits on the ground in front of us. "…I didn’t fucking want them anyway, skinny bitches." And with that, she takes off to a different part of the store.

"Wow, what a lovely lady…" I spin around and frown at Mina.

"What the hell Mina, we just need to get in and out, don’t start anything with anyone…" Mina had a bad a habit of attracting trouble, especially when she knew she could count on me to get her out of it. "Come on, let’s get out of here…" Mina nods, shrugging off my disapproving tone since she was probably used to it.

"We need to find you a man Mikasa…" I frown at her again as we make our way down the aisle. "…preferably one that’ll make you have a bit of _fun_." She giggles and I roll my eyes.

"Hardly seems like the time Mina…"

 

(Levi POV)  


God, I’m so fucking bored…

I’m taken back to my cell about an hour later and dinner comes shortly after that, the day passing by in the same monotonous blur as always. I enter back into the cell for the last time before lockdown.

"FIVE MINTUES ‘TILL LIGHTS OUT!" The guard’s voice bounces up through the various levels and clangs against the metal bars. I haul myself up to the top bunk and rest my forearm over my eyes, my mind drifting, trying desperately to take me somewhere else.

"Hey L-Levi…Rivaille…?" I sigh, too tired to turn and look down at Randle on the bottom bunk.

"What…?"

"I was wondering…if we had met in… like… d-different circumstances, do you think that-"

"I swear to God Randle, if you’re trying to confess your love to me-"

"What! No, no I wasn’t…" I can hear the kid sit up in bed and bang his head against the railing. "Fuck! Ah, no I wasn’t Levi, I just-"

"Chill out kid, I’m just dickin’ with you." He sighs, the springs creaking as he lays back down.

"I just… wanted to know if you’d have let me join you; since I was younger I always wanted to join the S Legion. My mum was always worried about me getting involved with the wrong people, especially because of the area I grew up in." I don’t say anything, letting him get whatever he needs to off his chest. "It was always so black and white you know, people on the streets are bad, everyone else was good, but…" Randle’s interrupted when the lights go out, the loud click of the electrics echoing through the cells. "…but you guys, you did good… you did bad in order to do good – you made that grey area…" I remove my arm from in front of my eyes and take in the pitch black ceiling, my other senses coming alive as the sounds of distant inmates become uncomfortably more prominent.

I fucking hate this place…Randle continues talking…

"I know people say you’ve done all those bad things… but… I don’t believe it. I think people just need villains in this world and they found an easy one in you." I sigh into the darkness, debating on whether to tell him to just stop talking. "… I think… that you let them believe that, because you knew they needed someone to blame. I know you didn’t do it anyway, I mean, I know you’ve done _things_ but… I know you covered for them… because that’s what a leader does, a _true_ leader anyway… he protects and he will sacrifice himself if he needs to,to save his men…" There’s a silence once Randle stops talking. I don’t usually like people talking about my personal business around me, and right now was no exception.

"You can believe whatever you want Randle… ça ne fait aucune différence pour moi…"

"…I always wanted to be part of that grey area you know…" Randle’s voice goes quiet at the end and I can tell when he falls asleep as his breathing evens out, but mostly because he stops fucking talking. I don’t know how long I lay awake for, but it was the usual ordeal, lying wide awake whilst the world sleeps around you. I stare up and try to picture the night sky, I imagine the stars would be out by now…

Not that I’d fucking know…

I know I’ve managed to fall asleep some time later when I’m woken up by banging from the next block. My eyes start to readjust to the dark again and I run a hand through my hair – fucking C block were always causing a fuss with the mental health unit right next door. I can hear the commotion in the distance get louder and a door swings open at the far end of our cell block, the collision with the wall making a painfully loud thwack down the cell walls.

"What the fuck was that?" Randle wakes up and whispers into the silent room, so quietly I almost didn’t hear him. I don’t say anything, trying to listen out for the cause of the commotion as we sit there for a few minutes in silence, no one appearing to have actually entered through the door. I close my eyes again and attempt to go back to sleep. When my mind finally starts to drift again a shout sounds in the distance, which wouldn’t seem like a particularly unusual occurrence given that we were in a prison…

But this wasn’t your ordinary shouting…

Someone was in pain…

"Can you hear that?" I hear Randle sit up in bed, the rest of the block still in relative silence, but I listen out for the muffled voices in the cells around us.

"Yeah…" I sit up in my own bed when the shouting turns to screams, still distant – but louder.

"What the actual fuck?!" More voices start sounding in our block now, the commotion next door waking up the other inmates. I jump down from the top bunk, landing soundlessly onto the concrete floor and walk over to the bars. I peer out, trying to adjust more to the darkness. I look over towards the far left corner of our floor and see the door still flung open from earlier, making a cold light seep into the dark three story room, the only indication that movement was actually happening elsewhere.

There are more shouts followed by gun shots going off and I take a step away from the bars. I turn to glance down at Randle; my eyes now adjusted enough to make out the subtle outline of him sat at the edge of his bed.

_'What the fuck is happening…'_

_'Loud assholes…'_

_'What do you-'_

_'I’m tryna sleep…fuck sake…'_ The various voices of inmates travel across the room, some sounding more concerned than others.

"Levi, some serious shit must be going on over there, you any idea what-?"

"The fuck should I know kid…?" I make sure to keep my voice bored, showing no sign of the uneasy feeling sitting in the pit of my stomach. As the commotion continues, more and more inmates can be heard getting down from their beds.

_'Dude what’s happening… ?'_

_'Let us out of here…'_

_'Serious shit…'_

_'...get out of here…'_

_'...fucking guards…'_ I try hard to filter out their mutterings so I can listen out for anyone coming this way.

"FUCK…THIS WAY!" Someone shouts it as they come crashing through the open door to our block, their entrance causing a series of questions and insults immediately being thrown their way. The door is about five cells down from mine and Randle’s, but whoever it was sprints passed our cell within seconds, the darkness making sure I can’t see who they were. I can hear when they get to the other end of the block as they throw the opposite door open and leg it out – presumably through to A block.

I see Randle stand up from the corner of my eye and move to lean up against the bars beside me.

"Who was that, w-what the hell were they running from!" Before I can say anything there’s a soft buzzing sound and the lights flicker on unexpectedly, causing a chorus of groans as everybody’s retinas are burned from the harsh adjustment.

"That’s weird…" I say it quietly, more to myself than Randle.

"What, why, it’s probably just morning…"

"No…" I shake my head before he can finish. "…it can’t be later than three in the morning; the lights shouldn’t be coming on." Randle takes a step back and opens his mouth to say something, but footsteps start pounding over the ever increasing screams and shouts. I take my own step back when two guards run passed our cell, one leaving a thick trail of blood behind him and the other yelling their directions.

"D-down stairs, we’ll…w-we’ll lose them through the back…!" I find it weird since the fastest exit to get out of the prison is through A block – if they were running from something, surely…

You’d want to head for the closest exit?

"YO WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING!" Randle bangs our cell bars, addressing the guards who disappear down the staircase, down through the lower two levels. Randle’s outburst causing another wave throughout the room…

_'Let us outta here…!'_

_'What the fuck is happening...?!'_

_'…open the cell doors…'_

_'…to get out of here!'_

Everyone goes silent for a moment when there’s another soft buzzing and we’re all thrown into darkness once again.

"What the hell--!?" The panic in Randle’s voice gets clearer and clearer by the second…

Then the lights flicker on once more…

"--What the hell are they d-doing…Levi…?" The lights were dimmer this time, as if less power was going through it.

"These aren’t from the main power supply, they must be backups…" I try and peer around the corner where the guards have been coming from, but there’s no one else around. "…I think something must have cut the po-" Before I can finish, a loud click travels across each cell, every single one unlocking.

_'Fuck yes…this is what I was talking about…'_

_'...fuck this…get…out of here…'_ It takes less than thirty seconds for the floors to become swarmed with inmates ceasing the opportunity.

"Come on, we should go…" Randle starts shoving our cell door open but I stop him with my hand, slamming him back against the wall next to me.

"You go out there now, you get hurt…" I glance back out at the growing commotion that’s spreading throughout our block. "…We wait for it to thin out, then we figure out what the fucks happening and where the fuck we need to go." I look back at Randle and see a brief flicker of indecision before he nods frantically at me.

We wait there for a few minutes, most inmates having fled either to the further blocks or down to the yard. The screams have started to die down but noises have begun to merge together, the prison now full of too many noises to decipher them from each other…

Except from the gunshots…

They stand out clearer than anything else…

 

(Mikasa POV)  


We nearly make it out of the store before we’re stopped, gunshots pounding against the front of the building. I throw my arm out, stopping Mina in her tracks.

"What the fuck… Mikasa…?" Mina’s wobbly voice can be heard over the sudden silence that fills the store, abruptly followed by the reborn spouts of panic. "Whose… why is someone shooting, wh-what do you think they’re shooting at!?"

"I don’t know Mina, but... we need to get out of here..." I stand back up straight and walk towards the front so we can peer outside. Screams and shouts start travelling from the far end of the room, people sounding like they were in pain.

"What the hell!?" Mina’s voice has gone quiet and strained, her own terror setting in.

"Come on." I grab her hand and lead us further away from the shouts, towards the manual door at the other end of the checkout counters. We stop just outside the closed doors and I go to open them, but they won’t budge. "Shit…" I shove my body against the push bar but nothing moves.

"PLEASE LET ME IN!" Something bangs into the door from the other side, causing Mina and I, plus some more people gathered behind us, to jump back. A man starts slapping his hand against the door, blood smearing, red hand prints covering the once pristine glass. "PLEASE, UH…" There’s a chunk of flesh taken out of his arm -what the hell is happening...?

"Should we help him, what's going on out there!?" The man stops banging on the door and turns to run in the other direction. I glance through the now blood smeared glass and see crowds of people, some running, some staggering and some fighting others. It’s like a crazy parking lot brawl. I grab Mina’s hand again and turn to run towards the other doors; we just need to get back to the car so we can get out of here. We push through the mess of bodies until I can feel the breeze of the outside.

"Back to the car…!" I pull on her arm but something stops us, pulling her in the other direction.

"Mikasa!!" I turn my head and see someone grabbing hold of Mina’s other arm, yanking her back towards the store. "Get the fuck off of m-me…" The guy looks sick, as if he shouldn’t even be able to stand, let alone show any kind of strength towards us. I let go of Mina’s hand and kick out, getting the guy in the shin, his leg bending at an unnatural angle – I definitely didn’t kick him that hard. "What the hell…?" The guy doesn’t let go of my friend and pulls her forwards, the both of us distracted by the disgusting display in front of us.

"MINA!" I shake myself out of the daze and go to grab her arm again, but the corpse like figure pulls her back and bites down on her shoulder, causing a scream to fall from her mouth. I fling myself forward and kick as hard as I can into the guys chest, pushing him to the ground, then once he’s down, I kick him in the head until he stops moving.

"Mikasa!!" My breathing is becoming more and more erratic as I turn to look at Mina, clutching her shoulder, blood pouring down her arm.

"Sh-shit, Mina, o-okay lets go…" I gently lead her to the car and we duck down to stay out of anyone’s way. "We’ll, um, uh…" I remove her hand away to look at the wound, clear bite marks around the deep hole, going straight through to the top of her collar bone. She starts crying, the pain clearly too much to handle.  "…We’ll wrap it up and get out of here okay, we’ll get you help when we get to Shiganshina…" I stand up and start to remove my cardigan, my top underneath more than enough to keep me covered.

As I stand to remove it, I glance around the parking lot and see the same occurrence again and again, people biting other people – speaking of mass hysteria – I duck back down behind the car to help Mina.

God, this can’t be happening…

I wrap Mina’s wound with the fabric from my cardigan and slowly encourage her to get into the car, closing the door behind her. I make my way around to the driver’s side and slip inside, trying hard not to attract anyone’s attention. I start the engine and sigh in relief.

"M-Mikasa…" Mina’s still crying and I lay a hand on her leg.

"I know Mina, just… just stay calm and I’ll get us out of here okay, I just need you to stay with me o-okay…?" She nods her head and I put the car in the right gear. I feel sick to my stomach, a new reality sinking in and the scale of it only now becoming apparent…

Please be okay Eren…

I slowly start to pull out of the parking lot and don’t get far before someone smacks into my window, smearing blood down the side of my car. I glance at the body but keep driving, teeth nattering against the glass and I put my foot down on the gas, not letting anything stop me before I’m back on the road. We finally get back onto the highway and I take a deep breath, the traffic having thinned out slightly since earlier. I move into the furthest lane and look over to see how Mina’s doing; her breathing beginning to come out in short puffs.

"Hey Mina, how...how you holding up?" I flick my eyes between her and the road, concerned about the paling of her skin. She nods her head.

"Okay…" Voice quiet. "…y-you know…what really annoys me about all of this…?" I look at her again and frown, a multitude of options going through my mind.

"What?"

"I… I dropped those _fucking_ energy bars…" She sniggers afterwards but winces when it hurts her shoulder, tears slipping down her cheek. I let out a small huff of air, not even remotely capable of laughing at this particular moment, I am, however, pleased to hear Mina joking, hoping it’s a sign that she’s hanging in there. We drive for a while longer, the radio going through various stages of static, some stations still getting in a few minutes of coverage but most have gone dead. The roads are getting emptier as I get closer to Shiganshina, the town itself a bit in the sticks in comparison to the areas around us.

"Mina?" I look over to the passenger side and see her head slumped against the window. "Mina!?" I move my hand from the steering wheel and jostle her leg, getting no reaction from her what so ever. I start to panic and pull over outside a quiet looking road side diner. We’re about half a mile outside the town now, we’re so close - I can’t have her falling unconscious now, not when I can’t even call an ambulance or anything.

As soon as the car stops, I jump out and run around to her side, opening the door to see if I can wake her up.

"Mina…M-Mina!?" I lift her head and gently pat her cheek, her skin freezing to the touch. How is this even possible, it hasn’t been nearly long enough for her body to be reacting this way?

I want to panic, I want to freak out, cry, shout, run away…

But I can’t do any of that…

I take a step back and close the door, not sparing any time to check the world around me.

"Step away from the car…" I freeze at the unknown voice behind me and slowly turn around. As soon as I spot the gun pointing in my direction I raise my hands, the man in front of me not looking directly at me, but at the spot behind me. "Step to the side…" I swallow and do as he says, in no position to argue. The man looked quite scruffy but prepared, his belt containing a rather eclectic array of tools and devices.

"I don’t want any trouble…"

"Then I suggest you let me take care of _that_." He gestures the gun at the point just beyond my shoulder and I hear a banging coming from my car. I turn around and see Mina, her face pushed up against the window, the blood from her shoulder smearing over the glass.

"Mina!" I go to take a step towards her but I’m stopped when the man grabs my forearm, pulling me back behind him.

"Don’t! She’s gone, she’s with God now! You can’t go near her, if she bites you you’ll turn as well…" Turn?…Bites me? 

"W-what… what are you _talking_ about?" My voice breaks towards the end and I try to take another step towards my friend, but I’m stopped – again.

"Your friend… she’s gone, dead…and now we need to take care of her, we gotta put her to rest…"

"What the hell does that _mean_!" The thumping on the car window gets louder and louder until a smash sounds around the quiet dirt parking lot. "Mina?" I whisper, struggling to recognise my friend, staring at the pale, corpse like body pushing itself through my car window, scratches forming all along her skin from the broken glass.

"Darlin’ I gotta take care of her…" The older man turns back to look at me and raises his gun. "…unless you wanna take care of her yourself?" I shake my head, my hands shaking from watching my friend…die?

"W-what?" Dead? "She…but she was fine a little while ago, she just needed…" I watch Mina push her torso out of the window, strange growl like noises coming from her mouth.

I think I’m gonna be sick…

"Close your eyes now darlin’, it’ll be over soon…" I shake my head again, but I know whatever's climbing out of my car – it wasn’t Mina. I turn just in time to avoid watching the bullet go through my friend’s head, causing her to go limp, body hanging out of the window and sinking onto the cut glass. Tears fill my eyes and I can feel everything start to sink in.

She’s dead…

And the world’s gone crazy…

"Come on, we should get out of here, I can give you a lift if you want, you don’t wanna be using that car there now…" I nod my head, not able to form any words. I slowly walk around the car, not taking my eyes off of Mina for a second…

What the hell am I gonna tell her dad…?

I open the driver’s door and gently take my backpack out and push the door to. I don’t really know the man who’s offering me a lift, but I don’t have much of a choice since he’s right – I can’t use this car anymore.

She didn’t even want to come in the first place…

"Come on now…" I start walking back to the man and he leads me away from my car and around the diner to his truck. I’m still reluctant to leave Mina behind…

She’s dead…

Shouldn’t I do more, like… say something…?

All of it happened so quickly, a few hours ago we were just driving in the car, but now she’s gone…

Because she’s dead…

"Miss?" I glance up at the man and nod my head again, understanding that we need to leave – I need to find Eren. "Where do you need to go?"

"Uh… Shiganshina… just a-a short way into town if you could."

"Of course…" He opens the passenger side door for me and I don’t move, eyes still glued to my friend and her torn up, pale body. "…I’m real sorry for your loss darlin’, but that’s the world now…" I look back up at him, my eyes widening.

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"It means…" He sighs. "…We’ve reached the end of days and God’s made a new path for us to follow…"

 

(Levi POV)  


I finally see a clear path down to the floor below and I grab Randle, throwing the cell door open and leading us down the first case of stairs. I have to avoid bodies splaying in all directions, some people looking in a state of panic, some, like they’re having fun.

"Where are we going, Levi, what the hell are we gonna do, we should get out right!?" I don’t answer Randle, too focused on where we should be going. I glance up at the floor we just left and see more people come running through the far left door – from the direction of where the commotion started, every one of them coming out covered in blood.

"We’re going this way…" I turn back down the stairs.

"But everyone else is heading _through_ , shouldn’t we follow?!"

"No Randle, surviving isn’t always about following the herd…" I stop for a brief second, looking back at him and tightening my grip on his wrist. "If you’d have known that, you wouldn’t be fucking _in_ here in the first place…" I turn back ahead and start pushing my way through the first floor of cells, most people moving out my way without prompting. I stop, taking in our options, most people heading for the main exit floor door. I look up once again and start seeing more people who must have come from elsewhere in the prison, more people screaming and then guns start going off on the top floor – bloody good job we left when we did.

Whatever the hell is going on in this prison isn’t just some riot…

I notice a door seemingly untouched from the frantic hoard of people, a somewhat insignificant door which I’m pretty sure leads to the kitchen area.

"This way…" I pull Randle along behind me, the kid too in shock to follow instructions on his own. Once we reach the door it appears locked or stuck so I take a step back and kick it open, the screeching of furniture sounding from the other side. I shove Randle through the door, quickly closing it behind me and I notice an upturned counter which I assume was what was keeping us out.

Someone else barricaded this door…

I shove the counter back and take in the empty kitchen, the noises from outside becoming muffled shouts, more noises echoing from further out in the prison – whatever’s happening is happening in every block.

I search for something I could use as a weapon and know exactly where I can get it. I walk round the corner, Randle following close at my heels and I start rummaging through draws.

"W-what are you looking for!?" I don’t answer him and grab a large rolling pin from the middle section. "You what? You think you can fight off whoever’s causing this with a fucking rolling pin!? I mean, I know you’re good at what you do Rivaille but…" I ignore Randle and take the rolling pin over to the other end of the kitchen. I raise it high and start smashing the glass of the cabinet, thick shards scattering across the floor and I flinch, avoiding any getting at my face. I drop the pin on the floor and grab one of the heavy kitchen knives out of the now broken display case. "Oh? R-right, yeah yeah that makes more sense." I roll my eyes at the kid and gesture for him to take one.

I leave Randle to it and make my way around to the other section of the large kitchen, a pair of muffled voices bouncing off of the metal counters – someone else was in here… presumably, whoever barricaded the door in.

I walk slowly around the corner and spot the two guards we saw run passed our cell shortly after the commotion started. One man is slumped awkwardly against the wall, blood pooling around his leg, bleeding from a wound that I could only describe as a… bite mark? The other man frantically presses a cloth repeatedly to the wound, quietly muttering empty promises that it’ll…

"..be okay man, o-okay.. we just, um, we just gotta get you outta here…"

"What the f-fuck was that, I swear he looked like he was dead…"

I listen in on their conversation, most of it making no sense to me since I had very little context on what they ran from. I spot Randle walking back over and decide we need to get moving, but first…

I want that guard’s gun…

I walk out from behind the counter, the semi-conscious man noticing me first.

"Shit! Lewis…!" The other guard turns to look at me, then grabs his gun from the holster on his belt, and now the guns pointed at me. I slowly raise my hands, keeping my face completely void of emotion and grateful that Randle had enough sense to stick to the shadows whilst I took care of it.

"I’m not here to hurt you." My voice sounds bored to my own ears, but I can tell my words had the opposite effect as to what I wanted on the two guards – the man holding the gun, looking up at me, hands shaking.

"Get the f-fuck back!!" I take another step forward, causing the guard to stand up, the gun still pointed directly at my chest.

"Your friend doesn’t look too good…" I glance down at the dying man on the floor and see more blood pooling from a second wound around his middle I hadn’t noticed before – he’ll be dead in minutes. "What the fuck is happening out there?" My voice is still calm, hoping it’ll help get some information out of the terrified man in front of me.

"Uh, I-uh, I don’t know, guys just started going crazy, attacking each other…" He jerks back and gestures at his friend on the ground – who I’m pretty sure is dead now. "…one of the f-fuckers took a bite out of him like so-some kind of animal…"  I frown for a second and nod my head down at his friend.

"Your friend is dead and we need to get out of here."

"DON’T FUCKING… tell me what to do inmate…!" I don’t flinch at his outburst – it’s to be expected, the guy’s gun still shaking in his grasp.

"Give me the gun…" I talk slowly, being shot probably the last thing I needed right now. "…and we can get out of here." The guard appears to be freaking out internally, his mind wrestling between the death of his friend and the offer to trust one of the prison’s highest security inmates. I take another step towards him and begin to gently take the gun out of his hand. As soon as the weapon is out of his grasp he crumples to the floor, tears streaking down his face as he sobs over his friend.

Hardly seems like the time…

"Jesus Christ, what happened to him!?" Randle walks out from around the corner, stopping to gawk at the site in front of us whilst I check the gun.

"There’s a door over by the freezer that leads to the back supply room which I’m pretty sure we can go through as a short cut to the staff corridor…" I look down at the guard, still freaking out over his friend. "…we’ll go through there and out via the main office area – it should be less crowded and there’ll be less risk of running into…" I watch the blood slowly spreading towards the drain in the middle of the ceramic floor. "…whatever the fuck did that." I place the gun into the waistband of my pants and tighten the grip I have on the knife. "Come on, we need to go." I say it, gesturing to the guard who hasn’t moved from his spot on the floor. "COME ON… or we’ll leave you behind!" Both men jump at my impatience.

"No n-no, we can’t go out there, there’ll be more of them…" I walk up, closing the distance between me and the man kneeling on the floor.

"Look, I don’t care what the fuck is going on, I just care about getting out of here, so you can either sit here and die alongside your friend or you can come with us?" My voice is quieter again, and I wait for the guard to make a decision. Once he does and he’s about to stand back up there’s a soft groan from the man still slumped against the wall, his body pale and eyes glazed over – you know…

Like a dead person?

"Get away from him!" I shout it to the guard but he’s already crawling back over to the corpse, desperate to see if his friend is okay. "Don’t…!’

"Tyler?" There’s a second of silence after the question, all three of us waiting for some kind of response – and all of us expecting very different ones at that…

But none of them quite like the one we got…

As the able bodied guard reaches out to his friend, the other lunges forwards, sinking his teeth into his friend’s arm.

"HOLY SHIT!" Randle shouts and I take my gun out in a split second, sending a bullet through the corpses head. "H-he just took a bite out of your f-fucking arm!"

"Shut up Randle, hand me that dish cloth." I watch the guard bleeding badly from the fresh wound shuffle frantically back from his friend – who I’m hoping can’t survive a bullet to the head. Randle gets back quickly with the cloth and I kneel down, wrapping it around the guy’s forearm. He looks up at me, his eyes frozen in shock and I put just a bit too much pressure over the wound to get his attention back on the immediate situation. I stop and look at him, weighing up my options.

"Are we just gonna ignore the fact that that guy just took a FUCKING BITE out his FUCKING ARM!?" I can hear Randle pacing up and down the kitchen but I leave him too it – all of us dealing with the exceptional circumstance in our own way. I glance down to the double time dead guard, then to the guy in front of me, then to his wound.

 _'…one of the f-fuckers took a bite out of him like so-some kind of animal…'_  What the guy said earlier echoes through my mind – one guy bites another, then he bites another – sounds familiar…

"I-I’ll come with you…please, don’t leave me here…!" I glance up from the wound to look at the man, my gut instinct telling me to put a bullet in his head here and now.

"Fine…" I let go of the cloth and gesture for the man to take over himself. "…but any shading shit, and I’ll put a bullet through your head…" I stand back up and head towards the back door by the freezer.

"So what!?" Randle catches up to me, flinging his arms out in exasperation. "…we gonna talk about what the fuck just happened! Is it safe to bring him with us?!" I get to the door and force it open, turning back to look at Randle, then glance at the shell shocked guard behind us.

"I don’t know what the fucks going on kid, but I do know that I am getting out of here, so you can either shut the fuck up and follow me, or, you can go off and find out for yourself…" My voice is low, and I’m quite frankly done with this night already.

All I know right now is that I am getting the hell out of here…

And I am _not_ dying…

in this fucking…

Prison


	15. Day One (Part 2)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaaah, this took way longer than I'd originally planned - Sorry guys!! I had such bad writers block, especially for finishing Mikasa's half of the story...  
> But I really hope you enjoy it and that it was worth the wait!! <3  
> The feedback for the first flashback was so lovely and I can't thank you all enough for your beautiful support!!  
> The chapter continues straight from the previous and its supposed to be that towards the end, both of the stories are taking place at exactly the same time  
> Next chapter will be back to normal, continuing with the main story back at the camp!  
> Thanks again guys - I love you all!! <3 enjoy!<3

(Mikasa POV)

It takes less than twenty minutes for the man; whose name I found out is Keith, to get us into Shiganshina, the back roads into town practically empty. My mind goes in and out, one second I’m focusing on the novelty Jesus bobble head on the guy’s dash board, the next I can see Mina, pushing her pale body through the window of my car.

"How you hangin’ in there… alright?" I peer over to the man beside me, and then back to the now all too familiar roads of home.

"I, uh…" I have to clear my throat, my mouth dry. "…yeah… yeah I’m okay." My voice is quiet, but must be convincing enough for Keith to nod, his own attention back on the road.

"You know… people use to call me crazy. Thought my head was up in the clouds when I told them the end was coming…" The end…? "…But here we are, one sub-plot away from a box office apocalypse movie…" He chuckles to himself. "…This is God’s will you know, he is judging us and this is when we must prove ourselves to him, prove to him that we deserve to live…"

God’s will?

Was it God’s will to kill my best friend?

I resist the urge to scoff and roll my eyes at the older man’s words; instead, I look off into the distance, more and more familiar buildings coming into view.

"I’m really am sorry about your friend…" I don’t say anything because there’s not really anything to say. "I lost my wife, not too long ago…" I glance over to him, frowning – immediately feeling guilty for ignoring the man. "…it…it wasn’t to one of those things, it was, uh… before this all started… _cancer_ …" He nods his head solemnly.

"Sorry…" My voice is still quiet as he shrugs it off.

"But we move forward don’t we…" He glances at me, smiling tightly. "…still gotta protect those who are still with us…" I nod.

People like my family…

A few minutes later we get to the high street  and everything looks relatively normal, no riots, no looting, no… dead people.

"Um, you can… you can let me out here… thanks." Keith smiles at me and pulls into a parking spot just outside the small post office. I look down the street and it’s so quiet. Shiganshina was always one of those small towny towns where everyone was always walking about and everybody knew everybody. I hop out of the car and turn back to the man who I owe a great thanks to… I think, although I can’t help but watch him shoot my friend in the head over and over again.

"Thank you for helping me…" I keep my hand on the door, wanting to get this goodbye over with so I can run back home.

"You’re very welcome missy, now… you be careful out there, world’s about to change… big time." I nod, part of me wanting to think the guy was crazy, but after what I’ve seen today… we’d all have to be crazy…

Mass hysteria it is…

"Goodbye..." Keith nods his head one last time and I close the door, watching him pull out and drive away, leaving me on my own in my silent home town.

Now I need to find Eren…

 

Our family home is situated down a small suburban street and I walk along the grassy bank, avoiding the puddles along the side of the road. The atmosphere was still eerily quiet, a complete contrast to where I’d previously come from. I turn the corner onto our road and take in all of the pristine homes.

Everything seemed so normal…?

I walk passed our neighbour’s and look over the street to Mina’s old house. The car was gone and there was no sign of life inside – hopefully they’d already left for Mina’s aunts and I wouldn’t have to break the news to them today. I start down our driveway, my heart beating a mile a minute, terrified of what I might find inside. I stand out the front door; glancing at all of the familiar ornaments my mum’s collected over the years. I think about knocking on the door…

Do I have to knock…?

It is an emergency…

I decide to check the handle and it opens, the door easing open to reveal an empty hallway. I close the door quietly behind me and take a deep breath, adjusting the backpack on my shoulder.

"Hello…?" I hear a clanging coming from the kitchen and my heartrate picks up. I slowly make my way further into the house…

Maybe they’ve already left as well…

"Mikasa?" I yelp at the sudden sound of my mother’s voice from behind me and spin around to see her standing there with a dish cloth, drying her hands.

"Mum?"

"Honey, you should have told us you were coming; I would have prepared something for you to eat…" She smiles at me; it was as if I’d walked into some alternate universe where not everything had gone to shit.

"What’s going on mum, where’s Eren…where’s dad!?" She keeps the smile on her face but I can see a small frown tighten around her beautiful face. "Mum…!?"

"Your father and Eren are just out the back collecting some wood."

Wood?

"Mum do you realise what’s going on out there, w-why…" I throw my hands out in exasperation. "…why aren’t you doing anything to get away, how can you just continue as if it’s nothing, haven’t you seen the news-?"

"Your father thinks it would be best if we stay put…at least until it all passes over… he’s not going to be happy , you know, you should have called in advance…"

Passes over…?

"Yeah mum I would have, and I _tried_ but all the phone lines are dead, most towns are without any electricity…" I don’t feel like I’m getting anywhere here and so I walk passed my mother and head for the living room, searching for my brother and father out the back. I hear the sliding of the patio doors and turn around to see Eren struggling with four large pieces of plywood.

"Mikasa!" As soon as he sees me, Eren drops the plywood, which gets him an immediate whack on the back of the head.

"For god’s sake Eren!" My father gives me next to no acknowledgment but Eren swiftly shrugs off the physical contact and runs over to crush me in a tight hug.

"Eren…!" I felt this wave of relief wash over me, no more questions, no more 'what ifs'. Eren was here and he was alive. I kneel down to give my brother a hug in return, the house still spinning around me. I look up at my father… "Why are you still here, we need to get out of here, you need to leave!?" I stand up, not letting go of Eren beside me. I can see the fading bruises up his arm, no doubt a result from my father’s temper earlier in the week.

I shouldn’t have left him here alone…

But I couldn’t take him with me…

"Running away would be ridiculous, where exactly do you suppose we go…?" Grisha wipes his feet and picks up the discarded planks of wood. "…everything will pass over soon." He doesn’t look at me as he says it and makes his way towards the kitchen.

"You can’t seriously think that…" I start following him, not about to just sit back and let him keep my family trapped in this ticking time bomb of a situation. "…you clearly haven’t seen what’s really going on if that’s what you think. I’ve been _out_ there! I’ve seen shit that changes _everything_!" My voice raises and I see my mother poke her head out of the kitchen doorway.

"What if she’s right Grisha, maybe we should-"

"NO...!" My father cuts her off. "…We already decided that we’d stay…" You mean _you_ already decided that you’d stay. "Nobody leaves this house!" He drops the plywood in front of the door, and I start to realise what it’s for.

He’s gonna board the exits up…

Because the bastard is more than aware of what’s going on…

"You must have seen it at the hospital, how can you think you’ll be safe staying here!?" I step up closer to him, making sure to keep Eren behind me. " _You_ can stay here, but I’m taking Eren and we- are- _leaving_ …" I say it quietly, more than prepared to kick down that door if I had too.

 

(Levi POV)  


Once we’re through the door, the noises travelling around the prison range from screams to disturbing silences as the three of us walk down an empty corridor, heading towards the staff area.

"So, if this is happening all over the prison, how we gonna get out?" Randle struggles to keep up with me and I stop just outside a heavy gate, separating us inmates from the free world. I ignore Randle and rattle the bars, assuming the power outage would have affected this area as well.  After a few kicks the gate swings open and I gesture for the other two to follow.

"I told you to shut up and just keep waking…" I look back at him then glance at the guard still following slowly behind. "…keep fucking pressure on that…" The guy peers up at me, eyes swollen from crying. "…or you’re gonna bleed out, making you dead weight."  I know why some people call me heartless, but I’m not, I just know when you need to move forward. I lead us through the gate and into the dimly lit corridor, lined with offices and papers scattered across the floor.

"Where do we go from here?" Randle tightens the grip on his knife and I can’t help but feel a small swell of pride when he keeps his cool, following my orders to the T.

"We’ll head up through here and out the back door, then…" I shrug. "…towards the back woods, there’s gonna be people fleeing from throughout the whole prison, most will be heading towards the city…" I glance back. "…that’s why we’re gonna go the other way." Both men nod their heads and I keep walking forwards. We walk in complete silence, listening out for anyone or anything that might be coming in our direction. I can see the door leading to the next building over – that should be our way out of here, but I stop abruptly in my tracks when a groaning sounds from around the corner.

Shit...

I put my hand out, a silent instruction for the other two to stop, and then we listen. I don’t know _what_ is groaning but whoever it is stumbles around the corner like a corpse, dragging one leg limply behind the other. When they turn to face us I can see a chunk taken out their neck and right shoulder – chunks that look like bite marks.  I start to lift my gun when another shot splits through the air and through the person’s skull, causing the body to fall lifelessly to the ground. I keep my gun raised, waiting for whoever shot out first to come round the corner.

"Erwin?" The guard behind me sounds relieved, taking one step forward before getting dizzy. Erwin looks surprised before finally taking a step towards us and I lower my gun.

"What the hell are you doing here!?" He sounds accusatory and I take my own step forward, leaving Randle and the guard behind me, Randle still gawking at the new body on the ground.

"What the hell are…" I scoff at his stupid ass question. "…it got kind of crowded in the cell block so we thought we’d go for a _fucking_ walk eyebrows!" I raise my hands as if to show how fucked up the whole situation is and Erwin sighs at my sarcasm. "What the hell is happening out there?" I calm down for a moment and wait for him to answer.

"It’s… it’s happening all over the country, people are going crazy…biting each other and..." He looks away for a moment then back at the guard behind me, frowning at the blood seeping down his arm. "It started with some men acting out in C block, guards were sent down to deal with it and it got bloody, then one thing led to another…fuck, Levi I don’t know…" he sighs, running a hand through his neatly groomed hair.

"Well what the hell do we do now… all over the country, how many people?"

"I don’t know… I don’t know the extent of it or…" He sighs again. "… the power cut off…" He gestures at me. "…as I’m sure you figured out and the phone lines have all gone dead. I was gonna get out through the next building, less people should have gotten caught up in it through there and… we can get out the back, head through the woods..." I nod my head and turn to glance at the two behind me.

"Yeah, that’s where we were going." I look up at the blond, taking in his blood soaked clothes and the black eye that I gave him. "How much have you seen Erwin?" He looks back at me – we never got along, in fact, we’ve probably wanted to kill each other more times than I can count – but right now, we’ll have to work together whether we like it or not.

"I’ve seen… enough, enough to know the worlds gone to _shit_ Levi, and if you get bit, that’s it." He says the last bit quietly, avoiding looking at the two behind us. I clench my jaw and pick up on where he’s going, lowering my own voice.

"You sure?"

"I’ve seen it Levi, I haven’t had to kill anyone…alive- _yet_ , myself, but the dead are coming back and it starts with a bite." Erwin looks uneasy as he peers back at his co-worker, clearly thinking the worst, not wanting to get the blood of a friend on his hands. "He bit?" I nod my head subtly. "Fuck! What happened?"

"Another guard was bit on the leg, died, bit back…" I shrug my shoulders.

"You still took him with you?" I shrug again.

"I wasn’t sure what to do… but if what you say is true…" We’re still talking low amongst ourselves when we’re interrupted.

"Erwin, Sir? What is going on…?" The guard grasps onto his bad arm, wincing from the pain. "S-sir?" Erwin looks sad for a moment then swallows, seemingly coming to some kind of decision.

"I’m gonna need you to turn around for me Lewis." The guard takes in his superior, unsure of what to make of the situation, his face already paling to a corpse like degree. He hasn’t got long left, that’s for sure. The younger guard does as Erwin says and faces the opposite direction; shoulders slumped, still clutching his bleeding wound. I glance at Randle who has been uncharacteristically quiet for some time and Erwin raises his gun, pointing at the unsuspecting guard – a guard who was under his employment, thus, his responsibility.

No man should have to take down his own…

Before Erwin can pull the trigger I raise my own gun, firing a bullet into the back of the guard’s head – his body falling with a dull thud against the PVC flooring, a clean shot through – no pain. Erwin is silent beside me as I turn to look at him, taking in the slight clench of his jaw. He’s mad, but I can see the gratitude behind his eyes.

"You didn’t have to do that…it should have been m-"

"No man should have to shoot his own…" I turn my body, glancing at Randle before continuing. "…besides…" I smirk up at the taller man. "...I’m sure you would have done the same curtesy if it had been one of _my_ men." Erwin gives a small smile. We both know he would have – but there would have been no curtesy there.

"So what…!" We both turn to look at Randle, his face taking on the terror we all kind of felt inside, glancing to and from the dead body. "…that’s it, y-you get bit then sh-shot in the _fucking_ head… no middle ground – we could have saved him!" Erwin steps forwards to address Randle, going back to his authoritative self.

"Inmate…"

"Randle…" I interrupt him before he can go on, glaring in his direction. "…he has a _fucking_ name Erwin, use it…!" The self-entitled blond looks at me, then back to the younger inmate, nodding his understanding.

" _Randle_ … I’ve seen it with my own eyes, whatever is going on here is going on everywhere…" As Erwin says it I can feel my stomach drop – everywhere – to everyone…? "… and once you get bit… _that’s_ it…"

 

(Mikasa POV)  


"Mikasa sweetheart, you can’t just leave…" My mother starts walking towards us. "…at least stay for dinner and we’ll talk about-"

"Are you for real!" I didn’t like yelling at my mother, but clearly after being married to my father, she no longer sees sense.

"Don’t talk to your mother like that!" Now my father and I were both yelling and I can feel Eren grip the back of my shirt tighter. "I said no one is leaving this house and that is final!" He grabs my wrist, using his grip to pull me forward.

"Don’t fucking _touch_ me old man…!" I rip my hand out of his and stand my ground. I wasn’t a little girl anymore and I wasn’t afraid of him…

I was afraid of whatever’s out there…

Grisha picks up the plywood again and takes the first one to the front room window, the banging of nails filling the eerily quiet neighbourhood.

Some flimsy plywood isn’t gonna keep reality out, _dad_ …

I turn around and kneel in front of Eren, ignoring my mother’s protests to come into the kitchen and have something to eat – she’s just as deluded as my father – but I suppose it’s not her fault...

Maybe I can get both her _and_ Eren out…?

"Eren…" I keep my voice low, not wanting to alert Grisha. "…I want you to go upstairs and pack some things in a backpack okay?" I rub my hands up and down his arms, trying to stop the anxious jitters his body’s putting out. "…just a few changes of clothes and a toothbrush and stuff, yeah… when you’ve done that, put it by the side door and come find me." Eren nods his head and takes off quietly up the stairs. I finally follow my mother into the kitchen, a warm pot sits bubbling on the stove and a casserole in the oven.

"Mum…?" I lean on the counter and watch her avoid my eye contact, her attention completely on the cooking pot in front of her. "…mum you can’t just stay here and think that being blissfully ignorant of what’s happening out there is gonna keep you safe… because all that will do is get you killed-’

"Mikasa…" My mother’s tone tells me to tread carefully, but we’re too deep into this to be so light footed.

"Mum, I’ve watched people _die_ today, Mina is _dead_!" My voice is a harsh whisper and I have to hide my shaking hands. All of it was still way over my head.  My mother stays quiet but I can see her eyes widen at the truth.  "Do you _understand_ now?!" I can hear my desperation slipping through, but it doesn’t appear to be enough. I sigh. "..Do you know where everyone else is… are the Carolina’s gone, Mina’s dad was going to go to his sister’s but it doesn’t look like anyone is around?"

"I…I don’t know Mikasa…"

"What about the other neighbours, the Arlert’s or the Mayfields…? Mum!?"

"I said I don’t _know_ Mikasa, okay?" I step away from the counter when she raises her voice, it was very unlike my mother, but then it’s back to a quiet whisper. "…I…I don’t know, your father got back from the hospital yesterday and he said that we were just going to stay here. I wasn’t allowed outside and Eren was to stay put as well." I worry that I’ve pushed my mother too far when I notice a tear fall onto the granite counter – but she needed to understand the reality of the situation.

"Mum-"

Heavy footsteps fall across the linoleum floor and my mother sees it as an opportunity to take the food away to the dining table. She was setting it up like it was any other family meal with us together. I turn to see my father standing in the doorway and his hollow eyes stare down at me.

"Where is your brother?"

"I’m here!" Eren’s little head appears from behind his father, smiling his usual, innocent smile. I silently ask Eren if he’s done as I’ve asked, raising my eyebrows and nudging my head in the direction of the side door. My brother responds by nodding his head vigorously but stops abruptly when our father turns down to look at him.

"Go sit down Eren, your mother has prepared a nice meal for the family…" Eren drags his feet but does as he’s told, taking the seat at the far end of the table. "As will you Mikasa… after all, you are still a part of this family…" He turns his eyes back to me and I tense my shoulders at his challenging tone.

Hell yes I was a part of this family…

I sit beside my brother and pick up my folk…

God this felt so wrong…

The world was falling apart outside, people we knew were dying and the life we knew was altering beyond recognition…and we were having _dinner_ …

"So Mikasa…" My mum paints a plastered smile onto her face and pops a carrot into her mouth. "…how’s work?" I can’t form a coherent sentence, my mind so utterly at a cross roads. My body wants to run; each limb twitches to move and when I look down at the casserole in front of me all I can see are the remains of my friend hanging out my car window…

I’m not hungry…

"Answer your mother Mikasa." My father says it to me without looking up from his own meal…

What the hell is wrong with these people? I glance over to Eren whose face tells me he feels the same discomfort as me – the both of us the only sane people in this house.

"It’s…um… its fine…" My words are clipped and the room settles back into an awkward silence, the clattering of cutlery on plates. Suddenly a strange noise sounds from the end of the street outside…

I can’t take this anymore… I smack my hand down onto the table, making my family look up at me.

"I can’t do this; we need to get out of here…!"

"Mikasa, settle down-"

"How can you just sit here like nothing is happening…?!" I stand up from the table, pushing my chair back and gesturing at my father. "…you’re a doctor for g-god’s sake; you’ve seen what’s been going on!"

"Honey I think you should-" My mum tries to play the pacifist but I don’t think there’s any more time for that.

"You’re putting your whole family at risk, what the hell do you think _this_ …" I gesture again wildly to the table. "…is going to accomplish?" I stop talking and feel the tension in my body build up as my father says nothing. I lean my body across the table, palms flat and voice low. "Eren and I are leaving this house, whether you like it or not…" I hear my mother stand slowly from the table.

"Mikasa, honey, maybe we should…"

"ENOUGH!!" Everyone around the table jumps when my father slams his own hand down onto the table, the cutlery shaking from his weight. "Nobody is going anywhere, this is my house and my family, so we will follow _my_ rules…!"

"How can you be so stubborn and obnoxious at a time like this...?!" I throw my hands up in the air, Eren deathly silent beside me.  "If you really cared about your family you wouldn’t just make us stay here!"

"I will protect my family, but _you_ …" He stands up from his chair and looks down on me. "…you are more than welcome to leave…" It hurt, not like the times he hit me before, but his words clipped at that quiet insecurity…

_'You’re not a part of this family…'_

"I’m going wherever Mikasa goes!!" Grisha glares at Eren, no doubt fed up of his children not listening. As everybody’s silent through this standoff around the table, there’s a light knock at the front door, my mother the first to jump at the opportunity to leave the room.

"I’ll get it…" she says it quietly, the rest of us too lost in the family dispute.

Because it’s easy to forget in that moment, what’s going on outside…

"Most of the neighbourhood has already left, it’s like a frickin’ ghost town out there…" I try reasoning with my father but he shakes his head.

"They haven’t _all_ left…"

"Then where _are_ they _dad_ …you’re so confident you have this all under control. You _know_ what the hell is roaming around out there…" I point towards the direction of the front door. "…if you didn’t you wouldn’t be putting _fucking_ plywood over the _fucking_ windows…!" My voice has risen again and I can see my father about to yell back…

And that’s when my mum screams…

 

(Levi POV)  


We leave the staff guard corridor and go through to the next building, the sounds of the inmates around us turning from loud cries to quiet, muffled screeching – whatever’s going on around us is seemingly coming to some kind of end.

"We’ll head around the medic area so I can reach my office…" Erwin glances back at me as we walk down the partially lit hallway. "…there are a few things I want to pick up, then we can get out the back, best run across to the far woods – shit was going down out front." I nod my head in reply, his plan pretty much still on point to what I wanted to do myself.

As we continue walking I start finding it strange how quiet it’s finally gotten, as if the commotion has come to a standstill. I stop for a moment, causing Randle to bump abruptly into my back, the kid not weighing nearly enough to jostle me but he apologises profusely anyway.

"What is it Levi?" Erwin stops accordingly, the three of us now stood in the centre of a silent passageway… well, almost silent.

"Do you hear that?" There’s somebody shouting…

"Hear what?" Erwin frowns, shaking his head, but I take off down the far left corridor before anyone can tell me otherwise. "Levi!? Where the hell are you going, we need to go…" I can hear Erwin sigh before telling Randle to follow me, their footsteps falling in line a little ways behind.

As I get further down towards the far offices, papers still scattered about the floor, the shouting gets clearer and I think I start to recognise the voice it belongs to.

"Get back you bastards! I swear to, wha… shit, uh… fuck off – HELP…SOMEBODY, ah…!" I start towards the sound faster, running until I come face to face with her.

"Hange? What the hell!?" I stop to take in the scene in front of me, a hoard of what look like half beaten bodies reaching up to Hange whose trapped on top of a rather precarious mountain of furniture.

"LEVI!? Oh my God, thank the love of Jesus, holy crap…!" A couple of the bodies turn to look at me as I hear Erwin and Randle come up from behind. "Erwin?!"

"Hange!? Are you okay?"

"I’m not gonna lie…" Hange looks down at the bloody hand reaching up for her skirt, then over to the one now limping in our direction. "…I’ve been better!" I get my knife out, gesturing for Randle to do the same and I take a step forward.

"Aim for the head just to be safe and remember Levi, don’t let them bite you!"

"Yeah yeah eyebrows…I got the memo…" And with that I shove my knife into the head of the closest body staggering towards me, the three of us making our way through the crowd of decaying bodies, Erwin’s words about the dead coming back, ringing truer than ever.

"Uh, fuck!" I turn to check on Randle behind me who pulls his knife out of a rather burlier inmate.

"You alright kid?"

"Y-yeah, I’m…I’m good." I nod my head and take down the last body before walking up to the mountain of furniture. I extend my arms up to help Hange get down, her sense of stability questionable at the best of times.

"Uuuuhhhh…" Hange grabs my hands and lets me get her down, she then chooses to throw her arms around me, a rather unprecedented and unwelcomed gesture. "You have no idea how happy I am to see you guuuuys!!" Hange takes a few deep breaths once I push her away, doubling over to check herself. "Whooo, huh…okay, so…" Hange gestures over the bodies covering the carpeted floor. "…anyone have any idea what’s going on?"

"We need to get out of here Hange..." Erwin steps forward.

"Yeah, way to point out the obvious…" I ignore the glare from Erwin and walk over to kneel down beside one of the rotting bodies. I faintly recognised the guy from A block, his features still somewhat familiar under the thin layer of tight skin that’s begun to peel around his face. I look down his body and notice a pack of cigarettes sticking out of his jumpsuit pocket. I take the pack and stand back up, facing the others.

"Levi!" Hange puts her hands on her hips, giving me a disapproving expression.

"What?" I shrug, shoving the pack into my own pocket. "He’s not gonna need ‘em…" I ignore any response she gives and head back in our original direction.

"So where we going!?" Hange asks the question as we make our way through the shitty corridor.

"We’re going to go to my office first, I want to grab some things and then we’ll head out the back…" Erwin nods at me before continuing and I nod back, responding to the silent question. "…then we’ll head through the woods until we reach the edge of town, avoiding the larger city." Hange nods her head and we walk in silence a bit further, noises bouncing around the buildings surrounding us. Once we get to Erwin’s office it’s deafly silent, the four of us cramming ourselves inside the overly furnished room.

"So what did you need from here eyebrows and better make it quick…" Erwin walks around his desk and turns on a monitor, the backup generator selectively working on various screens. I stand beside him and watch black and white scenes play out around the prison, the reality of the chaos around us sinking in. Hange gingerly closes the door behind us.

"What the actual fuck…?" I whisper it, watching inmates bent down on the floor, eating other inmates. If it wasn’t for the low resolution of the prison cameras, even I would find it too much to stomach.

"Everyone’s lost their minds." I turn around and see Randle staring wide eyed, his face taking on a concerning shade of pale.

"You alright Randle?" I frown at him, something in my gut telling me to get him out.

"Y-yeah, Rivaille S-Sir, I’m... I’m fine…" Hange walks up behind the kid and whacks him on the back.

"Could have fooled us!" She turns her wide suspicious grin onto me. "Have you had to fight many to get here?" I shake my head.

"We managed to avoid the main crowds and the inevitable bloodbaths that followed." I answer her question but don’t take my eyes off of Randle, who avoids any eye contact with me. Erwin starts rummaging around the cabinets and cupboards behind his desk and I walk back around slowly towards the other two.

"Randle…?" I walk over to him and Hange gives me a questioning look but I ignore it. "Randle I want you to raise your hands in the air…" I glance down at his hand, clasping the bottom of his prison shirt. The kid shakes his head, sweat glistening on his brow. "Randle…"

"Levi…" I turn to see Erwin, his face telling me he suspects the same as I do…

Randle’s bit…

But he doesn’t wanna die…

"Randle raise your hands…"

"I…"

"Now!" As soon as I raise my voice the kid weakly raises his hands in the air and the blood stain spreads across his front. I walk over to stand in front of him and lift the fabric, revealing two curved jagged edges in his skin.

Teeth marks…

"Randle…" He starts panicking, sobbing before I’ve even had a chance to ask him to do _anything_ – I keep my expression blank.

"N-nono please Sir…" It must have happened whilst we helped Hange…

"Randle, kneel down on the floor…" The kid’s face is almost as white as the papers spread across Erwin’s desk and the head guard walks around to stand beside me, taking in the newly discovered bite marks.

"Please…"

"If he was bit a while ago then he could change in a matter of minutes…" I look up at Hange, clearly the psychologist has seen more than I’d originally thought tonight. She notices me staring at her. "I-I saw it…earlier…it was, um, Sharon from HR and some of the guards up psych…" Hange pales at the memory and Erwin takes another step forward.

"Levi, you know she’s right, we already knew, once you’ve been bitten that’s-"

"Yeah I fucking know Erwin…I’ve been on this fucking train ride with you as well!" I clench my jaw and look down at Randle’s shoulders, shuddering from his sobs… and probably the pain.

I take a deep breath and let it out in a sigh…

"Randle…" I try keep my voice as soft as I can, which wasn’t a natural approach for me.

‘N-nonon-nono p-please L-levi…’

God, this world was fucking cruel…

"Randle… I want you to keep your back to me, okay?" The kid doesn’t bother begging anymore and nods his head, the blood from his wound starting to drip onto the floor. "…I want you to tell me…" I slowly take out my gun and point it to the back of his head. "…why you think you would have been a fine addition to the S Legion…" Hange steps back to stand behind me.

"I…" Randle struggles to speak, his body becoming weak and his breathing short. "…I would have t-turned my life around. I wanted t-to… do good…" His voice catches. "…I w-would h-have… made you proud L-Levi Sir…"

I feel sick…

"Levi…" I can hear the impatience in Erwin’s voice – we needed to leave…

"I would have been proud to call you one of my men, Randle…" I don’t spare it another thought and send a bullet through his head, his body collapsing in on itself in the middle of the floor.

"I’m so sorry Levi…" Hange whispers it and I see Erwin stand beside me from the corner of my eye.

"I thought a man should never have to shoot his own?" I sigh and glance up at the man before heading towards the door of the office.

"Technically, he wasn’t one of my men…" I put the gun away and look Erwin in the eye. "…He was just a fucking kid…"

And he shouldn’t have gone like that…

 

(Mikasa POV)  


"Mum!?"

"Carla!?" My father jumps back from the table and sprints towards the front door. I follow closely at his heels, quickly ordering Eren to stay put.

"Mum!?" Both of us rush around the corner and see Mrs Mayfield from next door, ripping a chunk out of my mother’s shoulder.

This can’t be happening… not again…

Please…nonononono

"Carla…!" My father picks up one of the discarded pieces of plywood and whacks Mrs Mayfield around the side of the face, her soft temple splattering across the wallpaper. The body of our recently deceased neighbour crumples to the floor and my mother collapses in my father’s arms.

"What’s going on…mum!?" Eren appears out of nowhere behind me and I spin around to stop him from seeing the mess in our front porch.

"Eren, I want you to go wait in the dining room okay, I’ll come get you…"

"What… w-what happened to mum?" I quickly stop Eren as he tries to poke his head around my body to get a better look. I grab his face and force him to look me in the eye.

"Eren , I need you to promise me you’ll stay in the dining room and keep yourself hidden until I come get you…!" He nods his head and runs off in the opposite direction, back towards our discarded meal. I turn back around to see my father; frantically pressing his shirt onto my mother’s wound…

_It’s God’s will…_

"Dad...!" I look up from the body and see more silhouettes moving towards our yard out of the side window. "…We need to go…"

"Help me with your mother!" I stand there for a moment, my eyes flicking between my mother and the other bodies coming towards our home. I should help my mum…

But she’s been bitten…

Flashes of Mina go through my mind, bodies splaying across the parking lot…everyone biting…

…everyone…

"I don’t think-"

"Mikasa, for the love of God, help me with your mother!" I don’t have it in me to protest; I leap forward and grab my mother’s legs. My father and I precariously carry her back into the house and I kick the door closed behind me, glancing out once more before it clicks…

We’re gonna need more plywood…

"Get her to my office, I’ll stitch her up…" It’s too late "…she hasn’t lost too much blood…" It doesn’t matter "…this is why I didn’t want her going anywhere!"

"No, it was staying in this bloody town which caused this, you left us stuck here and vulnerable!" I grit my teeth and narrowly avoid walking into the furniture.

"Don’t act like you know better than me Mikasa, I’ve seen what’s been going on out there!"

"Then why!" I knew he’s seen more than he’d let on, the hospital must have been a war zone. "…If you knew then how could you not want to get your family out of here!?"

"It is _because_ of what I have seen that I chose to keep them here!" Clearly we’ll just have to agree to disagree…

"Mikasa!" I jump at Eren’s voice and twist my neck around, taking in his paling face.

"Eren what did I say…!?"

"There’s someone out in the back garden…" Eren points towards the patio doors by the dining table. "Is mum gonna be okay?" My heartrate picks up and a thump sounds at the glass doors.

"Eren I want you to stay away from any of the doors, don’t under any circumstances let anybody in!" I didn’t think Eren would do anything so stupid, but I had to clarify. My mother makes strained noises as my father and I lower her to the ground between his office and the hallway. "Dad, I don’t think-"

"I know…" I look up at him as his own eyes travel over my mother, her face already losing any colour she had during dinner…

I felt sick…

"Mikasa…is mum-?"

"Eren, I need you to be quiet for a minute okay… _please_?" I close my eyes for a moment, taking a deep breath to calm my heartrate.

What are we going to do?

"Dad, there’s nothing we can do, you _know_ that, you’ve seen it haven’t you, at the hospital…" My father’s eyes are larger than normal and his voice is quiet when he responds. It was unusual to see him so…affected.

"I know…"

My mother was _dying_ …

The thumping on the back door gets louder and I hear a crash from the front door – the neighbours were here…

"Dad we need to get out of here…mum isn’t-"

"I can’t _leave_ your mother!" I stand there for a second; my priorities gave me an easy out – grab Eren and run, now. I look down at my father who strokes my mother’s hair with a gentleness I didn’t even know he possessed. I look around and see Eren peek his head around the corner, his eyes red from tears.

"I-is she dead…?" Eren’s voice is quiet and I nod, even though mum wasn’t physically dead yet, there wasn’t anything any of us could do.

"I’m so sorry Eren…" I bite my bottom lip, my stomach twisting at the situation. We all stood there, silently listening to the crashes and bangs around us. Our home was becoming the biggest target in the neighbourhood. I shake my head. I needed to focus before Mr Mayfield came through here and tried to finish off what his wife started. "Eren, go grab your bag, we’re getting out of here." Eren is still for a moment, his large eyes staring down at mum. "Eren honey, please!" I grab his arm, bringing him back into the room.

We both jump start into action, my brother may only be ten, but he’s already had to deal with a hell of a lot in his little decade. I can hear something groaning in the hallway, probably whoever managed to smash through our front window. I run around to the side door and see Eren place his backpack on and turn around, it’s the only door that isn’t infested, so it’s our best and only bet right now.

"Right, let’s get out of here...!" I run to the kitchen and grab the first knife I can find, then start towards the door. I turn back to look at my father. "Dad…?" My mum was unconscious, but if it was going to be anything like Mina, she was going to wake up soon. "…Dad!?"

"NO…!" He stands up from his position on the floor and grabs a piece of the plywood, ready to take out the next neighbour who walks round that corner. "You’re not going anywhere, it’s your fault this is happening!" He points a finger at me and my heart stops. "We were going to be fine, but you had to come home and cause a scene – you brought them here…!" Before I can think of anything to say to defend myself, Eren jumps forwards and stands between me and our father.

"It’s not Mikasa’s fault…!" Eren has tears streaking down his face, but he sounds so much older than his ten years. "It’s your fault and you know it, you were too scared to leave and now mum is _dead_ …!" Grisha seems taken aback and doesn’t react when Mr Mayfield appears from the hallway, his eyes glazed over.

Regardless of what’s happened and my less than perfect relationship with my father, I leap forwards with my knife…

But it was too late…

Mr Mayfield’s jaw clamps down onto his neck, causing my father to shriek in pain…

"Dad!" Eren and I yell at the same time and Grisha still manages to manoeuvre himself around and take out our neighbour with the plywood, but quickly collapses to the floor himself. I look down at him, then turn back to my brother. "Eren, I want you to be ready to go okay, stand back by the door and close your eyes…b-but keep listening out for anything, yeah?"

I needed to keep an eye on Eren, but I also needed to take care of dad… but I don’t want Eren to see this. Once I’m confident Eren’s out of sight, I kneel down beside my father, his hand pushed up against his neck to stop the bleeding.

"Wh-what can I do…?" I ask it quietly but he just shakes his head.

"Nothing…there’s nothing you can d-do and you know it as much as I do…" I look down at him and bite my lip. "…I’m…I’m sorry…I need you to take care of your brother, okay…?" I nod my own head, blinking away the tears. I go to stand but a bloody hand grabs mine. "Wait…you need to…" He stops talking and points to the knife still clutched in my other hand.

"What…?"

"If you don’t kill my brain, I’ll come back…as one of those…" I look down at the knife and realise what he was saying. They must have figured out a good deal at the hospital for patterns and how… _why_ this is happening. It made sense….

But I don’t think I can do it…

"I...I don’t…" I shake my head and the tears start falling. I didn’t have it in me. My mind was swimming around, thinking of Eren, who was about to become an orphan, thinking of my mum who was lying dead in dad’s office and then my father, a man who has been this looming presence in my life for the past fifteen years.

He used to scare me…

And now he’s dying… and he’s asking _me_ to finish him off? 

"Please…Mikasa…"

"…Okay…" My voice sounds so quiet to my own ears, I wonder if I really agreed.

"Thank you…" My father smiles. "…you stay safe…" I try and smile back but it’s useless, so lay his head to face the other direction and position the knife against his temple…

I’m never gonna sleep again after this…

 

(Levi POV)  


We leave Erwin’s office, now only the three of us. As we get further towards the back of the building we start to wonder if it was safe to go out the main fire exit since the prison had fallen into relative silence. It seemed like a good idea, until we looked outside and saw what looked to be hundreds of the walking dead, covering the pavement.

"Now what, we go out there, we’ll just get ripped apart…" Hange whispers it as she sticks up her head to glance out the window once more.

"We just need to get passed them to the left side, sneak passed and get into the woods towards town." I look over to Erwin then back to Hange, the first signs of morning light seeping into the building.

"What are you thinking?" It was always well worth asking her, ‘cause she was always thinking something.

"Well…" Her eyes widen ever so slightly and turn to me. "…what if we cause a distraction?" I raise an eyebrow.

"They’re practically walking corpses Hange, what are we going to distract them with…?"

"I don’t know…" She shrugs. "…they seem to want flesh-"

"Oh, okay then, you got any spare flesh…?!" We’re both whispering, my own voice getting more and more clipped as the conversation goes on.

"Obviously we won’t use our own-"

"Okay cool murder then, that’s fine…" I turn to Erwin. "…you hear that Erwin, we’re just going to sacrifice some other sorry S.O.B, let them get ripped apart and get out of here…"

"Shut up Levi, I would never suggest using an _innocent_ person…"

"Well good job we’re in a prison because all us inmates are just expendable, right!?"

"Of course I don’t think that Levi, I consider you a good friend…!"

"Will you two be quiet!" Erwin walks over to us, blocking out the thin slither of sunlight. "…I think Hange is right…" He holds a hand up to me before I can argue. "…Not about the flesh, but about the distraction… I have another idea…"

 

We’re sat inside a dark room surrounded by screens and panels. A single body lies across the floor with a bullet in the back of the head.

"What exactly are we doing here eyebrows?" I close the door behind us and take in the dull lights, the only sign of any remnants of electricity still flowing through the prison.

"We’re going to use noise to lure them over to the other part of the prison. I’ll sound the emergency siren in the main cell block building, whilst they’re distracted by that, we’ll get out the back the other way."

"What makes you so sure they’ll be _lured_ by noise?" I ask and Hange seems to have clocked onto the same train of thought as Erwin, stepping up to fill in.

"Even though they display very limited responses to normal human interaction, they seem to have responded to noise. Like when you guys found me in the corridor, the sound of your voices lured some of them away. It makes sense that if these semi dead… _people_ …are working purely on instinct, then responding to sound would make sense."

"So…you’re going to sound that alarm, and hope the hundreds of walking flesh eating _things_ out there are gonna go running towards it like a pack of fucking dogs?" I cross my arms and watch Erwin switch on various blinking lights around the room.

"Basically..." I frown for a moment and take in our current situation…

"Okay… seems like a plan I guess…"

 

(Mikasa POV)  


Eren and I sneak out the back of the house just in time to avoid the next wave of bodies coming through our front door. As soon as we make it out the front of the house I glance back and notice blood smeared across mums ornaments…

Not that I suppose any of it matters any more…

I take hold of Eren’s hand and lead us down the silent street, back towards the high street where Keith dropped me off earlier in the day. We needed to find somewhere to clear our heads and think about what we should do. The sun has set and we'd been enveloped into a night we weren’t prepared for. I look down at my brother and squeeze his hand. Eren hadn’t made much noise at all since we left. He had just witnessed both his mother and father die in front of him and, even though it wasn’t my first time losing my parents, I felt sick with knots in my stomach…

So many knots…

We reach the still high street and head for the post office. Nobody appears to be around and I take this as an opportunity to step inside, avoiding the small pieces of broken glass. It was a simple post office with a small shop to the side and upstairs is where Mr Hatchel lives, so it would be a relatively comfortable place for us to sleep.

I also knew that Mr Hatchel kept a shotgun somewhere around here, so that could be useful…

"Mr Hatchel?" I only raise my voice slightly as to not draw attention from the wrong…people. "Mr Hatchel…?"

Nothing…

I take hold of Eren’s hand again and lead him inside and up the back stairs. I call Mr Hatchel’s name a few more times but the place is clearly empty. I close the door to the tiny apartment behind us and settle Eren down on the closest chair. I was starting to worry he was in some kind of shock, and I didn’t know what to do…

"Mikasa?" I feel relief at hearing Eren’s voice and kneel down in front of him, my hands shaking from the post adrenaline.

"Yeah…?" Our voices are quiet in the small room.

"Thanks…" I nod my head slowly and run my fingers through his shaggy brown hair. "…we’re…gonna be alright…" At first I thought it was a question, but then I realised my ten year old brother was _telling_ _me_ …

It’s all going to be alright…

 

(Levi POV)  


We crouch under the window of the door, waiting for the siren to pick up. Every so often Hange sticks her head up to take a peek and I have to yank her back down again.

"For fuck sake four eyes, if one of them sees you, that’s it!"

"Sorry, it’s just so …intriguing…"

"No it’s fucking messed up is what it is…"

"Both of you be quiet…again!" Hange and I fall back into silence once Erwin calls us out. I wouldn’t usually be so quick to engage with her, but I’m wound so fucking tight…

I can’t believe this is happening…

"Okay…" Erwin stands up, gesturing for us to following him as he begins opening the doors. "…most have left from over here so we should make our move now…"

We sprint silently out of the door and immediately behind the next building, staying out of sight from the stragglers. I watch Hange and Erwin start towards the woods and I glance off in the other direction… I could run…

They probably don’t need me…

I should go find my family…

 

(Mikasa POV)  


I wake up in the apartment just as the sun is starting to rise in the sky, the street completely silent outside. I look down at Eren curled up on the seat, his eyes still closed and mind still blissfully unaware of the reality of today, so I let him sleep a bit longer.

I need to think about where we’re gonna go…?

What we’re gonna do…?

I’m way in over my head, and everyone around me was disappearing…

I walk over to the window and see the empty street, rubbish drifting across the road and abandoned cars parked at odd angles. I look up and see the beautiful colours of the morning sunrise…

 

(Levi POV)  


"Levi…!" I turn back towards the woods and see Hange standing there, gesturing for me to hurry up. "…Come on!! We gotta go!" Erwin’s stood behind her, the both of them as unsure as each other.

My family will have to wait…

"Jesus, keep your fucking voice down Hange…" I catch up to them and we start to make our way through the woods, leaving the prison behind, siren’s blazing.

The early morning sun streaks through gaps in the canopies above us and the trees finally open up to the other end of the woods, revealing the abandoned highway which will hopefully take us towards the town.

"Look at all those empty cars…" Hange says it quietly, in awe of the silence around us. "…it’s like… the end of the world…"  I nod at her comment and look up at the sky, the last of the stars fading from the sunrise…

 

(Mikasa POV)  


It’s hard to think what other people are going through in this moment in time… how many other people are struggling to get safe. I couldn’t be happier that I have Eren, having family to keep safe will no doubt keep me going…

But I hope there are other people out there…

People who can help us… otherwise…

The apocalypse is going to be a lonely place…

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr - jovialjellyfishreaper


	16. A Foreign Blade

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am aliiiiiive, omg, I'm so sorry for the massive delay!! All of my writing took a bit of a pause when I came home for the summer and then I was struck with some bad writers block - but here it is and I really hope you enjoy!!  
> The chapter is the first to start easing into the next big arc for the story so there's not masses of action or anything - mostly fluff and dialogue!  
> I really wanted to have some bonding moments with Eren and Levi and I love the idea of Levi humouring Eren and his childish ways XD I was a bit worried about the chapter since it was written in a lot of fragmented parts over a long while and some parts were written late at night where I was like "the hell was I on?" when I read it back the next day - but I kept it all in there anyways lmao XD but anyway, reaaallly hope you enjoy the new chapter!!
> 
> Thank you all so much for your continued support and I can't tell you how happy it makes me to hear how many of you are still enjoying it so much! Love you guys, my Rivamika friends <3333

(Eren POV)

“Okay, okay, I got one…” I gingerly step over a tree root, trying hard to keep up with Levi. “…If you could be _any_ animal, what animal would you be?” I finally catch up to Levi and we walk side by side. He sighs…

“…Any animal?” I nod my head eagerly. I love this game.

“Uh huh! Any animal!” He seems to think about it for a moment whilst looking around the woods. Mikasa said I was allowed to go on Levi’s patrol with him as long as I stayed where he could see me at _all times_ -which was fine by me. I enjoyed spending time with Levi like this because it was distracting and took my mind off of all the bad things that have been going on.

“Umm…” He yawns and scratches under his chin, kinda looks like he could do with a shave. “…I’m gonna say a…a dragon…?”

“A dragon!? Nuh uh, no, you can’t pick that, dragon’s aren’t real!”

“But you said _any animal_. I played by the rules.”

“Well, new rules!”

“No way, the rules were set at the beginning and I am sticking with my answer.”

“Fine…! Then I pick…uhhhh…” I look around the woods, trying to think of something just as extravagant. I glance up and catch Levi smiling at me; clearly he was finding this all rather amusing. “…I pick…a mermaid!” I smile, crossing my arms in some semblance of self-accomplishment.

“Interesting, why a mermaid?”

“Well, for starters, I would be really good at swimming…a-and uhh…and I could make friends with all the dolphins. It would be like having a massive playground under the sea with a _whole_ new world to explore!!” I look back up at Levi and return the question, looking for the same level of enthusiasm – but I’ve learnt not to get my hopes up. “Why a dragon?” He shrugs.

“Because dragon’s are fucking awesome… why else?” I nod my head, seeing his point.

“Yeah, no, that’s a fair point…” We walk a bit further through the woods in silence and I watch the green world around me. I always love coming out here, but since the strange people have been appearing, there’s been strict rules as to who can leave the camp– that’s why I’m with Levi now. “It’s your turn.” We walk around a large swamp like pit, Levi helping me when I nearly slip on the bank. My ankle twists at a weird angle and it hurts, but I don’t want to make Levi’s patrol even more of a bother. I keep the uncomfortable pressure to myself.

“Okay…” He sighs again and thinks for a moment. Even as he’s humouring me I can tell his attention is constantly on our surroundings – never letting his guard down. “…If you could…meet any person from history, who would you wanna meet, and they can’t be fictional Eren…” He looks down at me and I jump up… immediately regretting the impact on my ankle.

“Ooh, Easy! Jesus!” I wince slightly as I come back down.

“Jesus? _Really_ , I said they couldn’t be fictional.”

“Depends who you ask…” Levi raises an eyebrow and looks down at me.

“…Good point…so why Jesus Eren, what do you wanna talk to him about?” I keep my attention forwards and frown thoughtfully.

“I just have some questions for the guy…”

“Oh yeah? What kinda questions?” I can hear the amusement in Levi’s voice as he asks.

“Well, first I’d start with the whole ‘walking on water’ thing…” I look up and point a finger purposely at Levi. “…that could come in handy for when I become a mermaid.”

“That makes no sense, why would you need to walk on water if you were a mermaid?” I smile when Levi becomes sucked into my childish mind.

“Because then you could exist both in and out of the water with ease, Levi. It’s all about survival, I thought you understood that.” I shake my head slowly, showing the older man my disappointment.

“You know what…” Levi stops for a moment and picks up the trail ribbon we left on our way out – we must be nearly back at camp. “…I think this conversation’s crossed some line that I need to go back over.” I laugh.

“Ahhh, come on Levi, have a little imagination, what was the line?”

“Probably the Jesus mermaids…” I shrug my shoulders but understand his limitations as an adult.

“Okay, that’s fair enough, no Jesus mermaids – which, by the way, would make a cool band name.”

“…”

 _“Yeah?”_ I nod my head enthusiastically.

“You’re a weird kid, you know that?” I laugh again, my hurt ankle momentarily forgotten. We walk on for the rest of the journey in more silence until we reach the opening to the large meadow field. It’s the easiest indication that we’re close to where we started. If you head diagonally across the field towards the next opening of trees, it takes like five minutes to reach our little community. Levi stops on the outskirts of the meadow and looks out into the distance, his mind clearly elsewhere.

It was beautiful, the meadow that is. Flowers were shooting up from in-between tall stems of grass. It was an honest display of what happens when you leave nature to take its own course. I lower my body down and sit cross-legged next to a patch of beautiful purple flowers. I really needed to rest my ankle and I was starting to feel bad for not saying anything – Mikasa was gonna be mad... I pick a piece of grass absentmindedly and begin twiddling it in-between my fingers.

It’s been a week since my sister and Levi got back from the shopping village supply run, a week since my sister confronted Alice’s dad and a week since everyone’s become extra vigilant on the people spotted outside our camp. It feels like there’s always something going wrong and nobody gets a break. I miss when everything was simple…

I miss my mum’s cooking…

I miss my friends…

I even miss school…

I feel a knee jostle against mine and my mind comes back to the meadow - back to this world where there is none of mum’s cooking. I keep my eyes on the plain of grass until I hear Levi beside me.

“Hey…?” His voice is low and I quickly wipe my nose with the back of my hand, noticing my cheeks were becoming damp.

“S-sorry…” I rub my eyes and look up at Levi, his face softer than I’d seen it before. “I’m okay…” Levi gently places his arm around me and I immediately lean in to the half embrace. Few things made me feel safe now, but my sister and Levi always did.

“You know it’s okay…?” I glance up at him questioningly. “…to not…” He shrugs. “…you know…be okay, Eren.” I nod my head slowly and lift my legs up, wrapping my arms around them insecurely.

“I j-just miss…” It was my turn to shrug against Levi’s hard shoulder. He wasn’t the warmest person and I knew that, but what he gave me made me feel better. “I just miss lots of stuff you know…I miss my mum…” I say the last bit quietly and my voice catches. I hadn’t felt like I could talk to Mikasa about this in fear of making her feel upset – or worse – guilty. I knew Mikasa felt responsible for what happened back at home near the beginning, back when our parents died. Even though what our father said was in spite, the words stayed with her.

_We were going to be fine, but you had to come home and cause a scene – you brought them here…!_

 Levi’s arm squeezes my shoulder that bit tighter when I feel myself begin to cry again.

“Of course you do Eren…” Levi rests his head on top of mine and his voice is close to a whisper. “…we all miss people, and there’s nothing wrong with that.”

“Mikasa goes really quiet when I talk about it…” I look down, feeling slightly embarrassed. “…I feel bad though, like…” My voice does that horrible thing it does when you’ve been crying, like the air just can’t get through. “I d-don’t miss my dad…d-does that make me a horrible person Levi, is there something wrong with me?” I risk a glance up at Levi’s face and I can see his jaw clench before glancing down at me.

“Does he deserve to be missed?” It was such an odd question and I frown. What does someone have to do to _deserve_ to be missed? I _miss_ so much, my family, my mum…so many stupid and mundane things that I know if I think about too much, I’ll get upset – even if it’s just out of pure nostalgia. They make me think of quiet times and happy times – of peace, of home…but when I think about my dad…

I just think about being too scared to talk at the dinner table… of being stuck in my room when mum tells me he’s had a hard day at the hospital…

Of when my sister had to leave…

Of pain and fear…

And loneliness and…

“No…” My voice is almost too quiet and I slowly shake my head, not looking up at Levi as I say it. I feel Levi tighten his arm around my shoulders again and I know he’s still looking down at me.

“Then he’s not worth it Eren, and there’s nothing wrong with you…” I can see Levi’s jaw clench once more and his eyes are glazed over slightly as he continues. “Just because someone is family by blood, doesn’t mean you owe them anything. Sometimes the best family are those who were once strangers.” It felt like another strange weight off of my shoulders and if it had been said by anyone else, I don’t think I would have taken it to heart. I look down at the flowers in front of us without lifting my head up from Levi’s side.

 “My friend Armin would have been able to tell us what _all_ of these are called…” I feel Levi remove his arm from around my shoulder and I lift my head up. “…He was weirdly smart like that…” I hear Levi chuckle and I look up at him.

“So how come he hung out with you then…?” I shove Levi’s side and feel a bit more of the weight lift from his teasing.

“I protected him!” I lift my chin up, puffing my chest out.

“Oh yeah?” I glance down again and the sinking in my stomach comes back.

“Yeah…” My voice is quiet again. “…Armin got picked on a lot, but I always chased the bullies away…Mikasa always said I was too impulsive though, that I needed to realise when a fight was worth fighting.”

“You get in a lot of fights, Eren?” I keep my gaze down but see Levi mirror my own sitting position beside me from the corner of my eye.

“Yeah…I found it hard to…” I shrug again. “…just walk away, you know?”

“Yeah…I know…” I look up at him. “Sometimes…” Levi seems to think about what he’s about to say, like the conversation is taking a different rout in his own head. “…sometimes the bigger picture and the more sensible approach is… _clouded_ when someone you care about is in danger.” He looks down at me again; face slightly more open than usual. “Standing up for people you love isn’t a bad thing Eren…just; maybe learn to pick your battles…”

“Did _you_?” I’m not really sure why I ask it, but the look on Levi’s face tells me that there was more to what he was saying.

“No…” He says it so quietly I worry I’ve upset him, and then he looks out over the meadow, the sun making it appear an almost golden hue. “…No, I didn’t…” I rest my head back against Levi’s shoulder, not liking the flicker of regret I see fall across his face.

“You wanna talk about it?” I can feel, more so than hear, Levi chuckle above me.

“No, that’s alright Eren…” He looks down at me. “Maybe some other time, but I appreciate it.” He smiles, and I felt more at home in this moment than I ever did in my own father’s company. “Does your ankle feel any better?” My head shoots up at the question and I know my emerald eyes are wide.

“How...but, uuuuh…how did you know?” Levi looks down at me, his expression unimpressed.

“You've been limping for the last quarter mile, Eren. I was going to see how stubborn you were gonna be…’ I lower my head and run a hand over the slightly swollen skin above my trainer.

“Sorry…I just didn’t want to be a pain…” My voice sounds small to my own ears.

“Eren… you’re never a pain… sometimes, yeah, you’re annoying but you’re ten and loud. It’s gonna happen.” He looks down at me and frowns slightly. “Besides, I’d rather you be _a_ pain than _in_ pain…if you’re hurt Eren, you tell me or someone else. It’s important that we know you are able to run and get away if we need you to.” I nod my head frantically, my face warm from the midday sun.

“Okay…I’m sorry and I promise next time I’ll say something straight away.” Levi ruffles my hair lightly and looks towards the direction of camp.

“Good, we’ll get Ravi to have a look at your ankle when we get back; hopefully it’s just a light sprain.” I smile and turn my attention back to the violet flowers.

We sit there for a while in silence, both of us watching the sun get higher and higher in the sky. It must be getting close to midday which meant we would have to make our way back to camp soon. I kinda didn’t want to go – it was the first time in days I felt like I’d gotten away – the first time in day’s Levi was free to keep me company. I didn’t want to bug my sister all the time. I know she always tells me that I can talk to her about anything, anytime…anywhere, but sometimes you needed someone else, someone who wasn’t as close – but someone you could still trust…

They were hard to find…

“Did you know Hange still keeps track of the date?” I glance over to Levi for the first time in a little while, finding the silence a little difficult. It wasn’t like it was an uncomfortable silence, I just relished on noise.

“Yeah, yeah I did.” Levi seems to roll his eyes slightly at my question, a gesture I’m pretty sure is aimed more towards the subject of what I said rather than me personally.   

“Why…I don’t get it, like… it’s not like the date really matters anymore, right?” I keep my gaze on Levi and wait for a reaction.

“I think, Eren, there are probably a lot of reasons behind it – seasons, weather, keeping track of days since…” Levi shrugs. “…but, I reckon above all it’s another way to stay sane.” He finally looks at me and I frown questioningly. “Everybody finds different ways of coping, some clasp to numerical patterns like dates, some clasp to objects, some to dreams, hope, survival…people… everyone’s got their own way of getting through the next day.”

“Huh…so, what do you do?” I start fiddling with the grass again. “…I mean, you don’t really have any objects, you don’t even have a tent, and you don’t talk to many people…” I look up at him. “What stops you from going crazy?”

 

(Levi POV)

Stops me from going crazy? Kid, that ship has _sailed_ …

I sigh and look out over the meadow. It was probably one of the nicest days we’ve had in weeks. The autumn chill is lost on the wind since it can’t reach us through the woods and there isn’t a cloud in the sky. We’d been out longer than I’d originally planned but Eren seemed to need some time away from camp.

Even with everything that’s happened I find it easy to forget that Eren was only ten years old and I didn’t really know half of what he’d been through. He was always so happy and upbeat; I hadn't even begun to consider that the kid was holding so much back. Mikasa had given a very brief picture of their home life before everything, but even from those few choice words, I got a pretty good idea.

I wasn’t sure the best way to console Eren about his father and it had been a long time since I’d thought about my own. It had been so long and I had been alone _well_ before I was able to know what the world was supposed to offer. Even when they were around I never really had a family. Eren on the other hand lost everything along with the rest of the world, the parallels, nevertheless, made me feel quite sick. I wasn’t much older than Eren when my mum started to get sick, but before that, she was so frickin’ beautiful. I haven’t had anything beautiful in a long time. I had been thrown into a horrible world when I was young, and family had only ever caused me pain. I never came out of it the same and I didn’t want the same for Eren…although, he still had Mikasa…

And I sure as hell never had one of those…

I feel warm fingers linger on my bicep and I look up to see Eren, his eyebrows pinched into a concerned frown – I’ve probably been quiet for too long. Three months ago I never would have understood, that feeling of wanting to protect someone else from the world, but I didn’t want Eren to suffer anymore. I was starting to understand why Mikasa acted like she did when her brother was concerned.

This world was fucking cruel…

“You don’t have to answer that, I was just…curious, I didn’t mean to make you upset-" I hold my hand up, cutting Eren off before he can start spiralling into some kind of unnecessary guilt.

“It’s fine, Eren, I just… I was just thinking…” I’m about to answer the kid’s question when a voice calls from the edge of the woods – a familiar voice which has both Eren and I sitting up, looking at each other.

“There you are!” Mikasa jogs across the meadow and stops in front of us, hands on her hips. “I was expecting you guys back ages ago!”

“Eh oh…” Eren looks from his sister and back to me. “Busted!” I smile, turning my head to look up at Mikasa and lean back on my hands. Her hair appears darker in the sunlight and the day’s warm weather meant she had abandoned her jacket. A pale strip of skin is on show between her light strap top and low hanging jeans. I imagine the new apocalypse diet is what has them hanging precariously from those perfect hipbones. My eyes travel slowly to Mikasa’s face, an expression enticingly unreadable and one after my own heart. I can feel my lips smirk up at the corner…

Fuck, she’s beautiful…

“I apologise, we must have lost track of time, don’t be mad.” My voice has a hint of teasing I couldn’t keep out, which makes Mikasa bite her bottom lip and cross her arms.

“I wasn’t… _mad_ , I just…shut up.”  I hold back a laugh from her fluster but unfortunately Eren hasn’t got quite the same control. “Eren!” I stand up and stretch my arms, joints popping back into place – Jesus, how long were we sitting in this field? Mikasa looks down at her brother then turns her attention back to me. “Erwin wants to talk to you, it sounds urgent.” I let out a sigh and run a hand through my hair, completely done with whatever the hell was happening in these woods around us.

“Fine…” I look down at Eren, gesturing for him to get up. “Come on kid, let’s go.” I watch an unsure look cross over Eren’s face and my mind is taken back to his swelling ankle. Kid’s probably worried about letting his sister in on the damage.

“Eren?” But it’s kinda hard to get anything passed her. “Are you okay?” Mikasa frowns down at her brother then up at me. A silent question. I sigh again and kneel down to the ground, my back to Eren.

“Get on…” I immediately feel the weight of Eren against my back and his winding arms around my neck. Standing up straight once again with her brother clutching onto my back, piggy back style, I turn to Mikasa. “He sprained his ankle on the way around; he probably just needs to stay off it for a little while.” I explain what happened before Mikasa can start bombarding us with questions. I can already tell Eren’s giving her his best smile, eyes wide and innocent expression. It works. Mikasa sighs and looks down at her brother’s ankle, concern mixed with exasperation – an expression I’m beginning to get used to. We start walking off in the direction towards camp, Eren’s legs swinging in and out by my sides.

“Am I heavy?” Eren’s voice is close to my ear, genuine curiosity slipping through that you can only find in the tone of a ten year old.

“Yes”

“Hey!”

“You _asked_!”

“Yeah but you’re not supposed to say ‘yes’!!” There’s a moment of silence before Eren’s breath tickles the back of my neck once again.

“Am I heavier than Mikasa?”

“Definitely not...”

“Hey!” This time I feel a slap on my shoulder, turning my head to see Mikasa scowling in our direction and her brother’s laughter echoing from behind me. I chuckle at her attempt at anger, adjusting Eren on my back. As our laughter dies down I feel Eren rest his head against my back, his arms holding on that bit tighter and I glance once more at his sister, but she’s already looking at us…

and she looks happy…

 

I drop Eren off at the medic tent with Mikasa, promising to meet her later so she can '…trim these bangs so you don’t look like an angsty teen anymore'. Anyone else would have lost at least a finger for that comment, but I could feel my lips lifting up at the corners.  

I knew it was stupid and I knew I had to stop it. Getting close to people in a world like this is foolish and irresponsible and…

Fucking naïve…

It’s been a week since I kissed her and I did it impulsively - I haven’t done it since - blind impulsion becoming somewhat of a trend around her. We haven’t spoken about any of it but somethings changed… something I don’t know whether I should push away, or cling to for dear life. I had to be careful…

I walk into Erwin’s tent, the space large enough to fit four grown bodies around a wooden table. I look down and see a tattered map of the general area somebody found at a nearby gas station.

“Levi, so nice of you to finally join us.” I glare up at Erwin as I approach the table, letting the tent flap close behind me. Hange smiles at me and Mike offers a silent nod.

“What did you want?” Erwin ignores my question, continuing with some half assed lecture on punctuality.

“You have a responsibility at this camp Levi and I am relying on you to be where I need you to be. Whilst you’re off playing happy family, the rest of us are trying to figure out what the hell is going on around our camp…” I can see Hange turn to stop Erwin from saying something unnecessary but I raise my hand to stop her.

“Sorry…” Hange doesn’t hide her astonishment at my reply. I’m actually pretty proud of how steady my voice comes out. I’d actually had a nice morning, the first day in nearly a week since I’d managed to spent time with Eren and got away from the stress of our fucking current situation. The fact Erwin had the nerve to imply I wasn’t doing shit to help was enough to make me want to break his perfecting structured jaw.

But I am a better person than that…

“Just focus on what’s important…besides…” He pretends to wipe off some invisible dirt from his still pristine jacket. “…I don’t think you can really afford to lose another family Levi. I highly doubt you have the stability to deal with it…”

“Erwin!” Hange’s voice bounces off of the fabric walls and I feel Mike’s arm stretch across my chest. I hadn’t even realised the step I’d taken, my hands clenched at my sides. “Levi’s here now so just show him what Mike found. This doesn’t need to turn into a thing.” A second goes by and Mike lower’s his arm, taking a step to the side so I can see what Erwin lays out on the table -the asshole’s straight face showing no signs of remorse for his fucking words.

“Mike found this, this morning, in the east part of the woods.” I tear my eyes away from Erwin and look down to see a knife lying in the middle of the map.

“It’s a knife…?” I cross my arms and raise an eyebrow – a small part of my brain knowing I was just being petulant to piss him off. Hange’s voice chimes in before Erwin can.

“Yes! Exactly! It doesn’t appear to be anyone’s from camp so it must have been an outsider. The location Mike found it was just outside where we park the trucks and it definitely wasn’t there a few days ago.” I take a deep breath and let it out in a sigh. I pick up the knife and twirl it between my fingers, taking in all of the markings. It was a nice knife, that was obvious from the cut of the blade. It wasn’t a household knife, the style and hold showing all the signs of a heavy street weapon. It was capped in dirt, the markings nothing but a fuzzy blur.

“I don’t know what you want me to _say_ Erwin, it’s a fucking knife. We knew there were other people around here – that’s the foundation of our problem – _okay_ , so we know they’re armed but I don’t understand what you want me to take away from this.”

“The fact they’re armed tells us that they’re dangerous Levi!”

“This whole _fucking world_ is dangerous Erwin, heck; I’d be more suspicious of someone who _wasn’t_ carrying a weapon by this point!” I feel Hange take the knife out of my hand. I’m not sure whether this is because she wants to examine it herself or whether she’s worried I might stab Erwin with it.

That’s fine; I’ll just use my _other_ knife…

“I don’t understand why you’re not more concerned by this Levi!”

“Of course I’m fucking concerned, I just don’t think _this_ …” I gesture violently to the knife in Hange’s hands. "…changes anything! I don’t understand what you want me to do, see the knife and track them down like a fucking bloodhound. I worked in organised crime Erwin, not fucking C.S.I!”

“Boys please!” Hange raises her hands, one still clutching the knife, the other now holding a dirty rag. “Let’s all just take a deep breath…” She imitates her own instruction. "…calm down, and discuss this like mature adults.” I raise my own hands and rub my eyes with the base of my palms.

I wasn’t even sure why I was getting so worked up – maybe because I was actually more concerned by this knife than I wanted to let on. I’d seen plenty of weapons like this before in the city. They were used by a certain type of criminal, a high end blade – something you’d be angry to lose in the middle of the woods.

“Okay…” My voice is somehow steadier once again. “…we’ll organise another patrol party and see-” I’m interrupted by a gasp from Hange beside me.

“Look, I think it’s an insignia!” Before I can grab the knife from Hange, Erwin swipes it from her grip. My heart rate picks up but I refuse to let the fire inside my head show – it was probably nothing.

“Do you recognise it!?” Erwin slams the knife down, newly polished side up, and I feel my jaw clench involuntarily.

Inside a crooked shield is the faded insignia of a disproportioned unicorn… I pick the knife up and run my thumb over the blade - it was sharp – like it had recently been sharpened. I feel my stomach drop and I take a shallow breath, trying hard not to show the rest of the room my reaction.

“Levi?” Hange leans forward to glance at me. “Are you okay?” Before I can answer, Erwin slams his hand down onto the table, crumpling up the map.

“You do recognise it, don’t you?! It’s a gang insignia isn’t it!? We should have gotten further away from the city limits!” I watch Erwin run a hand through his hair and I lower the knife to my side.

“It…” I shake my head, my voice coming out quieter than I’d planned. “…it could have got into the hands of anyone, this doesn’t mean-”

“I asked if you recognised it, Levi! It could mean _nothing_ , or it could mean there are very dangerous people watching _us_!!” I decide to keep my voice low, trying hard to stop my racing pulse.

“Yes I recognise it Erwin but that doesn’t mean-”

“Don’t fuck with me Levi!!” Erwin walks around the table to stand in front of me, looking down at the knife still clutched in my vice like grip. “Innocent lives are at risk here, you might not care but they are my responsibility now…” I don’t say anything, glancing down at the floor. I take a deep breath. “Are they friends of yours, huh, Levi? Did you work together!?”

“No! I _never_ worked-”

“Did you bring them here, did they come here because of you!?” My head whips up at his question and I feel Hange’s hand rest gingerly on my shoulder.

“You honestly think I’d do something like that?”

“I don’t know Levi, but I find it rather strange that of all the places this knife could have been found, it was right outside the camp where Rivaille set down his roots…” 

“Look, I’ll…” I run a hand frantically through my hair and focus on keeping my temper in check. “…I’ll look into it. I don’t know why they would be around here…?”

“And what about what they want, why would they would be watching us, Levi? Do you know the answer to those questions? Because I’m thinking they’re not here to make nice – especially if you didn’t work _with_ them.” I take a step back and let Hange stand between us.

Jesus, I deserve a fucking medal for this composure…

“We’ll take the afternoon to cool off…” Hange holds her hands out at arm’s length between us. “…then we’ll reconvene and see what the best way to handle this is, okay?”

“And what if we don’t have time to cool off before Levi’s _friends_ decide to show up again!?”

“They’re not-!”

“Both of you shoosh!!” Hange turns to me, blocking my view of Erwin behind her. “Levi, I know that this is in no way your fault, no matter what bullshit Erwin starts spouting-”

“Hange!”

“Shut up Erwin!!” She holds out a single hand without looking away from me. “…As I was saying, we will discuss later the next course of action as of how to deal with this. I know that you have just as many people here you want to protect as anybody else.” She gestures down to the knife in my hand. “Keep hold of it and let us know if anything comes to mind, besides, that’s a high end street weapon…”  I should have known she knew way more than she’d originally let on. “…So who better else to wield it?” Hange smiles at me and I think I’ve just been dismissed. I nod my head and I rest my hand on her arm – a silent ‘thank you’. I turn to leave, but not before missing Erwin’s last passing comment.

“You better fix this 4836…”

“That was never my _fucking_ name eyebrows!” I leave the tent before anything else can be said and take a deep breath, hearing the muffled end of Hange reprimanding Erwin back inside. I close my eyes and place the knife into my belt. The whole conversation feels like a blur and I can feel my pulse rate jumping all over the place – my day having literally gone from a calm meadow to a figurative shitstorm within the hour.

I needed to calm down and think about what to do next…

It could be nothing…

Or it could be my past coming back to bite me and every single person inside this camp in the ass…

My mind was racing a million miles a minute and I hated myself for losing what composure I did inside the tent. A few months ago, it would have just been another obstacle - that’s all my life was before, obstacles - but now, there was so much more at stake. I could feel myself going crazy...

_‘What stops you from going crazy?’_

 

(Mikasa POV)

 

“If you hold still Eren, the results won’t be nearly as bad…” My words finally manage to get Eren to stop fidgeting whilst I attempt to cut his hair. The sun was still high in the sky and the camp had decided to fully embrace the rare display of sunshine during the early autumn months. Eren and I were sat on the hill just above the lake, various people jumping in from the jetty.

I told Eren that he could go swim with his friends once he let me trim his hair. It had gotten overgrown at the sides and was starting to look as if he’d been living, well… in a field. I wasn’t a hairdresser, but I did pride myself on picking up on any skills the world presented me with. So that’s why I’m sitting on the grass in front of my brother, scissors in hand and the sounds of splashing children behind me.

It sounded like fun… it sounded normal…

Anyone would have thought we weren’t in the middle of an undead apocalypse. I hear a sharp intake of breath from above me and look up to see Levi walking towards us down the hill, shaking his head - the sound causing Eren to turn around.

“You should see it from the back kid.” Eren frantically lifts his arm up at Levi’s comment and runs his hand through his new hair cut.

“What?!”

“Shut up Levi, Eren, it looks fine!”

“Well yeah, you would say that, you cut it!”

“Well next time you can cut it yourself and then we’ll see how _that_ comes out.” I hear Levi chuckling as he takes a seat beside Eren on the grass, myself still sat in front with scissors in hand.

“You laugh now…” I point the scissors in his direction. “…but you’re next.”

I continue finishing the last remaining long ends of Eren’s hair. He manages to sit still for the last ten minutes until I give him permission to join the others by the lake. Not two seconds after it’s out of my mouth, my brother sprints down the hill, chucking his shoes and socks off behind him.

“Careful of your ankle Eren!!” Ravi had told him to not use it too much, but of course he wasn’t gonna listen. I drop the scissors back inside the bag of tools Hange gave me and turn to look at Levi who appears miles away in thought. I manoeuvre myself to the left a bit so that I’m sat in front of him, his body still showing no sign of noticing me. Something seems wrong…“Hey?” I say it softly as I rest my hand gingerly on his arm. The contact seems to bring Levi out of whatever deep reverie he was stuck in and I can see his jaw clench subtly before he sighs. “What’s up? The summoning by Erwin not go well?” I say it teasingly but I already know my concern slipped through without permission.

“Just…” He shrugs and throws his head back with a humourless laugh. “…I don’t even fucking know right now.” It was weird to see something bothering Levi like this. I was so used to him being on top of and composed about every situation. Whatever the hell had him like this – I wish I could make it go away.

“Well, I can offer you a mediocre haircut and a solid half hour distraction if that’ll help?” I raise my eyebrows, picking the scissors up. “We need to shave your undercut and sort those bangs out.” I watch Levi’s eyes roam over my tools and up to my face where I give him a small smile.

“Okay…but I’m trusting you to not fuck this up.” I look him in the eye and place a hand over my heart, my voice dripping with both humour and mock sincerity.

“I am humbled that you would entrust me with such a responsibility in these desperate and trying times.” Levi rolls his eyes and I pick up the bag with the rest of the equipment inside. “Hange only managed to find a straight razor for your head so you’re gonna have to sit very _very_ still.” I pull out the cut throat blade and stand up so I can move to sit behind him. I cross my legs on the grass and sit with my knees pushed up against his back. I get out the thin shaving cream and a small towel, ready to start. “Now sit up straight and don’t move.” Levi does as instructed and I run my hand through his raven hair, stopping to suspend it off of the shaved back. “Can you hold it up so that I can use both my hands.” Levi stays silent as he does as I ask, moving his own hand so that it sits just over mine in his hair. I smile to myself and remove my hand form beneath his and begin shaving the back of his head.

Even though I was joking earlier about Levi trusting me, it was still kind of a crazy thing to let somebody do to you. I imagine not many people have managed to get this close to Levi with a blade in the past. I spread the shaving cream over the short hairs and bring the blade down with the upmost of care, using the towel to wipe off the excess cream – and then repeat. It wasn’t a difficult job, just rather precarious.

I can still hear people splashing in the lake and I risk a glance around Levi to spot Eren, no doubt the one making the most noise. I keep my free hand gingerly over Levi’s as I try and keep his head still. I rarely got to spend time with him during the day at the moment with the whole outsider in the woods thing. It was actually kinda weird to see him in the daylight, since most days he was off on supply runs or patrolling around the local areas near camp.

I almost forgot how pretty he was in the sun...

Part of me felt rather distracted, sat so close to him, not the most ideal frame of mind when handling a blade so close to his skull – but it is _his_ fault I’m distracted. I can see his neck tattoo clearly from where I’m sat, the wings of freedom I suppose he said. His arm holding up the back of his hair is littered with designs and shapes I don’t recognise but manage to refrain from asking about. Levi leans his head forwards as I bring the blade down to the bottom of his scalp and I spot another larger tattoo just under his t-shirt, spread between his shoulder blades. 

For a split second my mind wills me to reach out and run my hand over it, but I don’t. There was so much of him I wanted to explore but I’m pretty sure it’s not mine to discover. It’s been a week since he kissed me and a week since I had started to do more than see the guy in front of me as just ‘Levi’. Now he was ‘Levi’, the man who was keeping me from going insane – but no one deserves that kind of weight on their shoulders. The two days after, I hardly saw him at all and my mind immediately went to ‘oh my God he regrets everything’ and then I internally slapped myself for being a fifteen year old girl. Besides, if he doesn’t feel like that about me then that’s fine…

_“Mikasa?”_

He’s good with Eren, Eren loves him, he keeps us safe – that’s enough for me…

_“Mikasa?”_

It’s not like it’s a good idea anyway, getting that close to someone in this new world was just…

_“Mikasa!?”_

Naïve…

I feel a hand clutch my wrist and I look up to see Levi twisted around to look at me. I must have been zoned out pretty bad.

“Are you okay?”

“Sorry…I was… _distracted_ …” Levi looks unconvinced and doesn’t let go of my wrist right away. I frantically will my pulse to settle down and I close the straight blade, pretty happy with his undercut. “It’s all done here, so…” I flick the bangs that hang in his face and smile. “…I’ll just do the front and then you’re free to go.” He lets go of my wrist and I run the towel underneath to get any leftover cream. I run my hand over the shaved area – not bad for a first time hairdresser. I collect my things and bring them back around to sit in front of him.

The hill makes it quite difficult to sit comfortably but I manage to settle down on my knees, my eyes level with Levi’s as I inspect the overgrown damage. I lean over to grab the scissors.

“Heya Levi, lookin’ good!” Connie and Sasha wave as they walk past, probably on their way to the woods. “Think you could do mine Ackerman?” Connie smiles and I raise an eyebrow.

“I don’t know, it’ll cost ya _Springer_ …” Sasha laughs and runs her hand over Connie’s buzz cut.

“I’ll do your laundry for two weeks if you get rid of this head fuzz.” Sasha offers and Connie swats her hand away. “We’re gonna go meet Hange to do some foraging, see you guys later!” And then they walk off, leaving Levi and I alone again.

“Chin up…” I adjust his head to be level with my own again so I’m able to make sure the trim comes out symmetrical. Oh God imagine if I screwed that up. I feel like a painter asked to restore a priceless painting.

I slip and suddenly the Mona Lisa’s got one eyebrow thicker than the other…

I am not qualified for this…

“You sure you’re alright?” I’m pulled out of my second inner turmoil in the last five minutes and see Levi looking at me with a questioning eyebrow, smirking. 

“Yes, I was just making sure I didn’t make you lop sided.” I grab his chin again and level it out once more. “And stop smiling; it makes your head move.” My comment just makes him smile more and I start finding it hard to stay professional.  

We sit there for a few minutes whilst I concentrate and Levi goes back to mulling over whatever had him distracted at the beginning. I felt like kicking myself for wasting this opportunity, he was sat right there and I had nothing to say. I’d finish cutting his hair and he’d have to go back to the woods. I would probably see him later in the evening before Eren and I went to bed because he always seemed to make sure he saw us at least once before the day ended. Something I’ve clung to for the past week.

“Can I ask you a personal question?” I snap my head up at Levi’s question, not really expecting him to say anything. A personal question? As a rule, Mikasa Ackerman doesn’t do personal questions, people could mind their own business. Anyone else would get some half assed misdirection, but that’s not what came out my mouth.

“Yeah, of course… about what?” I lower my fingers from the ends of Levi’s hair and sit back on my calves, looking up.

“Your and Eren’s father, he wasn’t a nice guy was he?” It definitely wasn’t a question I was expecting and I feel my shoulders deflate.

“What…What makes you say that?”

“Something Eren was getting upset about earlier.” Levi doesn’t take his eyes off of me and my stomach drops. Eren was upset? Why didn’t he talk to me? “He was worried that the fact he didn’t miss his father made him a bad person.” There’s a pause of silence and I look down at my hands, fiddling with the scissors. “Do _you_ miss him?” He asks it quietly.

I think about the conflicting thoughts that have pooled through my head since that day. I never wished the man was still here, I don’t think I ever miss him – he doesn’t deserve to be missed.

But the day he died still plays through my head every night…

“Not really…” I shake my head gently and look up. “He, um…he wasn’t a great dad… to either of us, but, Eren probably got the worse end of it. He was a very stressed and angry man, don’t ask me why he was so angry, he was just… the whole world was against him,  _apparently_. Eren ended up needing fixing up a lot. He was a doctor and so the hospital was already like a second home to us.”

“That’s why you hated hospitals…” It was said as a statement rather than the question I was expecting – nothing to tell me he expected to hear more – but I kept talking anyway. I nod my head.

“Eren never really lived in an environment he felt completely safe in, and…it was always something I vowed I would change for him, but…” I gesture lazily to the world around us. “…I guess now I never will.” I bite my bottom lip, waiting for the ripple of emotion to pass over.

“I’m sorry for asking-”

“No don’t, it’s…it’s fine.”

“I just thought the kid was keeping a lot back, maybe you should talk to him.” I nod my head again and sit back up on my knees, my face level with Levi’s once again. I need to finish this haircut.

“I will, thank you, _really_ , for bringing it up. It’s comforting to know that if he doesn’t want to talk to me then he has somebody else he can go to.” I smile and adjust Levi’s face gently to finish off the last few strands of raven hair, but Levi grabs my wrist, stopping me in my tracks.

“You’re a bloody good sister, you know that… and I would have killed for someone like you when I was younger.” He looks down for a moment, then back up into my eyes. “I imagine my life would have turned out very differently.” It was my turn to glance down and back up into pools of grey.

“Well… you have me now…” I’m not really sure why I say it, but I wanted him to know that…

I wasn’t going anywhere…

“Yeah…I do…” He smiles and it makes my stomach burst into a million butterflies, and  - oh God – I’ve turned into a fifteen year old again.

“Aren’t you lucky?” Levi raises his eyebrows and looks off to the side.

“Well, sometimes…” I slap him on the arm and raise the scissors as he chuckles at my attempt at a serious face.

“Don’t piss off the hairdresser until they’ve finished the job.”

“Sorry…” He didn’t look very sorry. We sit there for a few more seconds when I decide that it’s my turn.

“Can I ask _you_ a question?”

“Only seems fair…” I start cutting the final strands that hang in his face before continuing.

“Why don’t you ever speak French?” I finish with the scissors and sit back again to look up at him. He runs a hand through his freshly cut hair, seemingly satisfied with the way it still hangs around his face. I didn’t cut it too much, because quite frankly, I quite liked what he had going on. It still hung across his forehead, but now without getting in the way of his line of sight.

“Why?” He seemed amused, if anything, by my question.

“Well, it just seems weird that… _Hange_ said you were born in France, w-which would make you French, but I never hear you speak French. I just thought, I don’t know!” Okay, now I was rambling.

“I don’t speak French around you Mikasa, because then you wouldn’t know what I was saying.” He smiles down at me and I sit up straighter. His tone suggesting his answer should have been obvious.

“What makes you so sure I don’t understand French, hm?”

“Do you?”

“No, but that’s beside the point…”

“Kinda sounds like it’s the point…” I cross my arms against my chest and raise my chin up defiantly. “I haven’t lived in France for a long time Mikasa, it hardly ever seems necessary…”

“Say something…” Levi raises his own eyebrows at me. “…in French, anything…” There’s another silent pause before Levi leans forward, cupping my face, his long fingers grazing against my cheek.

“Tu vas être la mort de moi, belle fille têtue… ” I can feel my heart beating against my chest as I watch the words fall flawlessly from his lips.

Fuck, the French was too much…

He leans back, letting go of my face with a smug grin across his face.

“Merci pour la coupe de cheveux.” He stands up from our spot on the hill, leaving me sat motionless; willing away the flush I know is adorning probably my entire body. I eventually look up and see Levi looking down at me, his hand outstretched to help me up. The smug grin was still there. I let him help me up and I use my free hand to flick one of the longer strands of raven hair.

“Not bad for a beginner…” I can see Levi about to reply when a loud shot echoes through the camp.

We both freeze…

Was that a gunshot?

The camp seems to stop, the sound still travelling through the open air around the field and birds flying up from out the canopies in the woods. It didn’t make any sense, no one’s supposed to use guns this close to camp. It was a massive risk for luring walkers nearby. Maybe it was just a car…or…

I feel Levi squeeze my hand and then there was a second gunshot…

Something’s very wrong and it’s coming from the woods…

I look up at Levi and see his jaw set, his expression mirroring what I can only assume must be my own. No one from our camp would risk a gunshot this time of day so close to the camp…

And then the yelling starts…

“LEVI!!”

“SOMEBODY GET LEVI!!

“ERWIN!”

“WHAT’S GOING ON!?”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr, in case you have any questions about the fic/updates or wanna talk more directly:  
> jovialjellyfishreaper
> 
> French translations:  
> Tu vas être la mort de moi, belle fille têtue (You're going to be the death of me, you beautiful stubborn girl...)  
> Merci pour la coupe de cheveux (Thank you for the hair cut)


	17. It's About Survival

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 17!! Whoo!! I can't believe I've written 17 chapters for this bad boy!! XD  
> Thank you everyone so much for such beautiful and motivational comments, I'm so happy you guys still enjoy this story <33  
> Really hope you enjoy the new chapter! We're gradually getting into the thick of it!! 
> 
> Love you, my Rivamika friends <3 Stay cool!!

(Mikasa POV)

Almost immediately after the second gunshot went off, I saw the look cross Levi’s face, and then he was off. My mind was scrambling, I needed to follow him, I needed to see if someone was hurt…

I knew it wasn’t Eren, Eren was here with me…

Maybe no one was hurt, maybe it was an accident…

But there were two gunshots, and two gunshots can’t be an accident?

I can already see Levi sprinting up the hill towards camp, people yelling and shouting in the distance – he’s probably following the commotion. My mind takes a few minutes…seconds?....to catch up with me and the world around me starts again. I spin around to the people behind, seeking out Eren, his eyes wide.

“Naomi, I need you to stay here with the kids okay?!” All of the younger children who had been playing blissfully in the lake have frozen, waiting to be told what to do. Naomi nods her head frantically at me. “Don’t let any of them go near the woods, dry up and head back to camp…” I start walking backwards up the hill, my footing unsteady. “Eren, you stay here, you understand!? Where Naomi can see you!” As soon as I see Eren reply I turn around and run up the hill.

The sun, which originally felt like a God send now felt like a burning weight on my shoulders. I felt sick. It must be the people who have been in the woods, nothing else made any sense. No one would risk making that kind of commotion and racket so close to camp, and at such a busy time of day.

As soon as I reach the upper field of tents I can tell everyone else has already been ordered to stay back from the wood’s edge, designated campers going out to search for the cause of those gunshots – Levi must have run straight towards it…

Of course he did! Someone is obviously in danger, and he wouldn’t react in any other way…

I look around at the scattering of people who have stopped whatever they were doing to wait in solemn silence and fear. Everyone wants to know what’s going on, wants to know if this is the beginning of something new…

Or the end to something sacred…the end of the camp…

I look into the dim opening of the woods and start off at a sprint, heading for the shouts that had already begun to build up….

 

(Levi POV)

I’m only about a quarter mile into the woods when I hear voices, some yelling, some turning frantic. I break through the last fray of trees and see the small gathering of people ahead. Erwin’s the first body I recognise with his height and imposing presence. He turns around to see me and the look on his face is grim…

Someone’s on the floor…

“Erwin, what the fuck…?” I take a step back, my mind blocking out the extra voices, some beginning to argue. Time slows – I probably need to do something…

“Levi!” This was Furlan, stepping forward from the small crowd and running up to stand beside me. Erwin says nothing but steps aside, a silent instruction to come forward. So I do. I step forward, and the group parts for me, somebody else – Braus - kneeling down on the floor beside…

“Hange!” I drop to the floor as I take in the blood seeping around Sasha’s hands as she pushes as much pressure into the wound as she can.

“H-hey L-Levi…l-look I got sh-shot…” Hange winces as she attempts to sit up. Her tone holding a hind of amusement, but I can tell how much pain she’s in.

“Y-yeah four-eyes, I can see that...” My voice comes out shaky as I gently push her back down and run my eyes over the area of the wound. “Don’t stop the pressure Braus, okay?” Sasha nods frantically at me and I can see her knuckles get ever so slightly paler as she pushes down harder. Going off of the amount of blood, it looks as if the bullet missed the axillary artery – but only by a few inches or so. Being shot in the arm shouldn’t have Hange down like this, it must have hit _something_ …

“She was fine for a minute or so, we didn’t actually think that she’d been hit…” Sasha doesn’t look at me as she relays what had happened. “…b-but then she was bleeding, like, a lot… and she slid down to the floor-”

 “H-Hey, Levi…?” I return my eyes back up to Hange’s, my hearing beginning to tune back into the woods around me. I grab Hange’s bloody hand in mine and feel the chill running through her body already. It was already going into some kind of shock, the recent living conditions and strain on our bodies probably not helping.

“Yeah Hange?” I sound tired…

And I wasn’t even the one who was shot…

“It’s…” She takes a shaky breath and I sense someone kneel down beside me. “…It’s g-gonna be okay, yeah?” I let out a humorous chuckle. It’s said as a question, but I get the feeling she was trying to comfort _me_ …

Idiot…

“Yeah, it’s gonna be alright…”

“Hange?” I turn my head to see Mikasa, eyes wide, staring at Hange.

“M-mikasa, hey…got myself int-to a little pickle…” Hange lets out a pained chuckle and I squeeze her hand a bit tighter.

“Yeah, looks like it…” Mikasa sounds strained and she looks over to me to smile before taking over from Sasha, whose hands had begun to shake. “Ravi’s on his way now so everything’s gonna be fine…” She nods her head, banishing any waves of doubt from her voice. Hange nods gently and closes her eyes.

“Hey, no passing out yet, okay?” I tell her and Hange makes a small sound of protest, bordering on whingeing, a response more like the Hange we know. The arguing around us appears to have stopped and I feel a heavy hand land on my shoulder.

“Levi…” I look up to see Erwin, no sense of authority, just an expression that I can’t read and a weight that I can’t budge. A weight that says, ‘I’m sorry’ but stresses ‘We need to move…’.

“They’re still here…?” I give Hange’s hand one last squeeze and stand up beside Erwin.

“Connie says they fled off North after the two shots, he saw them…” I spin my head to Connie and he nods, clenching his own weapon in his hands. “I need…” Erwin stops for a second, glancing down to Hange and back to me. “… _We_ need you to go after them, they couldn’t have gotten far in the woods – there’s still time.” I take a deep breath, looking out in the direction Connie now pointed.

I didn’t wanna leave Hange…last time I left, it was too late…

But that was different…

“Levi…” This time it was Furlan. “…Hange is gonna be okay, we should take this opportunity…” I know he’s right, but they could have gone. They could have run after them without me…

_‘We need you…’_

“Okay…” I take a second, adjusting my perspective and altering my focus… “Furlan, Springer…” I spin around to glance over the rest of the group that had accumulated. “…Braun! You’re coming with me!” The three of them are immediately at the ready. I look down at Hange one last time and catch Mikasa’s eye.

“She’s gonna be here when you get back Levi, I promise…now go…” She gives me one last smile, focus never fully shifting from her pressure at Hange’s wound. I give one last nod and take off in the direction the assholes think they got away…

 

(Mikasa POV)

I watch Levi run off with the other three at his heels – no hesitation when told to follow. I can feel Hange’s laboured breaths underneath my palms and her face has gone an ungodly pale. I’m no doctor…

But this is bad, at least, without a hospital…

Erwin stays with us, instructing Sasha and Marco to inform other campers of what’s happening and to get away from the wood’s edge. I look up at him, still waiting on Ravi’s arrival.  When I first arrived it was kind of hard to process, the borderline chaos and the blood…

There’s a lot of blood…

I’d never seen Levi like that, his eyes seemed far away, almost as if he was reliving the past whilst also frantically trying to process the present. It looked as if it was too much. But when Erwin stepped in, it was the first time I had seen the larger man look at Levi as an equal. His eyes sorry but ready to help Levi take action. It snapped Levi back to the situation. His eyes became focused, his body shifting, almost as if he was becoming a different person.

I guess, the person he used to be who dealt with this on a daily basis...

“Mikasa?” I didn’t realise I had spaced out until I felt Ravi’s hand on my wrist, his face sympathetic. “Can I take a look?”

“Oh! Uh…y-yeah! Sorry…” I slowly remove my hands from Hange’s wound and sit back onto the hard ground. I take a minute to look at the scene around me and notice Nanaba on Hange’s other side, passing Ravi supplies whilst he cuts open Hange’s shirt. I look down at my hands and try to wipe some of the blood off onto the glass behind me.

It didn’t really work - not enough…

“She’s incredibly lucky, an inch off and the bullet would have hit her axillary artery. I don’t think I would have been able to stop the bleeding enough out here… I wouldn’t have had the equipment or the time.” Ravi pulls the rest of the fabric away and winces. “It’s hit the brachial artery though, that’s why she’s loosing so much blood…I can buy a little time with a simple tourniquet.”

“What’s that?” I sit up right, ready to be of any assistance I can.

“I-it’s uh…” Ravi gestures out in front of him, his mind visually working out what he's got to do. “It’s a tight bandage which will allow me to stop the flow of blood through the artery to the limp, but it can be, uh… it can be as simple as a thick cord.”  Nanaba starts taking a thin but strong bandage material out of the bag and passes it to Ravi, who begins to systematically wrap it around the wound. “We still need to make it tighter, the bullet has gone deep but hasn’t gone straight through. We need to get her to a stable enough condition that I can take her back to camp and remove the bullet before infection.”

So we need to get Hange back to camp before she bleeds out…

We were lucky she was shot where she was since it could have been worse. Being shot in the arm, even though it was a close call, means the wound can be controlled – cut off from the rest of her blood supply… but not literally…

At least, I hope…

Oh God…

“Mikasa?” It was Hange. Part of me thought she’d already passed out, the pain must be pretty bad. I quickly stand up and manoeuvre myself around Ravi to kneel gingerly by Hange’s head. I lean forward to take her free hand – the one not connected to the treated arm.

“H-hey Hange, how you hangin’ in there?” Her eyelids flicker ever so slightly before focusing on me above her.

“Where…” She winces again as Ravi begins to wrap something just above the wound, around the top of her arm. “What’s going on?”

“Um…Levi and some of the others have gone after whoever it was that shot you…so…so everything’s gonna be alright…yeah?” Hange nods her head, eyes still not quite adjusted to me.

“Yeah…yeah s’gonna be alright…” Then Hange passes out…

 

(Furlan POV)

“Connie, any idea where they could have been headed!?” I try catch my breath at the back of the group beside Connie as we sprint through the overgrown woodland.

“I…uh, I don’t know…uh…I don’t think they really said…” I keep my eyes in front and keep my focus on Levi’s back, his limps avoiding any and all obstacles, as if he ran this way every day. “Once one of them fired… sorry…” Connie struggles to keep his breath and fill me in at the same time. “…they just t-took off…towards this way…” I think I see him shrug his shoulders from the corner of my eye.

“Levi…!” It was Reiner up front. “Over there!!” Reiner sticks out his hands towards a thick out cropping where two blurring dark figures are struggling over the brambled land in the distance.

“Nice spot Braun!” We shift our direction and run towards the two lone figures, trying not to draw too much attention in order to keep our element of surprise. They don’t know we’ve come after them yet. Levi sticks his arm out in a silent instruction to slow down. Connie and I trickle to a stop in the back.

The two figures are still struggling but one makes some head way – he’s gonna get away – but he’s leaving his friend behind. Levi sees the opportunity and circles around the small clearing, keeping himself undercover. The three of us watch silently as Levi makes his way, dead silent, towards the unsuspecting asshole who hurt Hange. I look over the mess of branches and brambles to see the other guy slowly getting away, serving his ‘friend’ one last glance behind him.

But then he sees Levi coming up from behind the man he left…

Before the other guy can warn his mate, Levi clocks him around the side of the head with his elbow, causing him to become disoriented. Taking advantage of this, Levi kicks the guys feet out from under him and catches the back of his jacket, stabbing it through with a knife from his belt. The dizzy man now hangs awkwardly from the tree like a pathetic prize. Pinned to the bark like an animal…

Levi did it in the matter of seconds…

“W-wait, wait wait, shit!! Shit! Wait!” The guy starts to focus and realises we’ve caught him, Connie, Reiner and myself jogging over to catch up. “I didn’t do it, I didn’t shoot your friend!!” The guy’s talking fast, waving his hands around, his eyes glancing warily at the knife stuck just above his head. Levi takes one step forward, silent and face blank. “Please…p-please, I didn’t shoot her, it-i-it was him, I swear!!!” He sticks his hand out, pointing towards the other man who’s now frozen in the distance.  “He did it!!”

The wood is silent for a second, no one knowing what to do next – except…

Levi knows exactly how he wants this to play out…

I take my own step forward and glance at Levi’s face, still no expression. Any concern or fear it held earlier for Hange has been shifted to the back of his mind. He was a different man in front of these men – and I suspect they knew exactly who he was.

The guy in the distance still hasn’t run off. Perhaps he’s concerned for his friend – but I find this hard to believe. It seems more likely that he’s worried this guy’s gonna give up info they can’t afford to leave behind.

“Well…” Levi’s voice is deadly calm as he takes one more step towards the man he skewered to the tree through his jacket. I can see him swallow, obviously terrified as to what might happen to him. “…the way I see it, we only need one of you to answer a few questions…” Levi’s steady and quiet voice fills everyone with an unease. Even us – and we’re on his side.

Before any of us can say any more, he takes out his gun in one swift motion and sends one shot across the brambled crossing. The gunshot echoes through the woods like a constant flashback, the sound making everyone else take an involuntary step back. Except from the guy who was getting away, the guy who allegedly shot Hange, the guy who stood almost fifty metres away…

He collapses to the floor…

“Levi?” It comes out accidently – I didn’t want to question him….

But the guy was dead…

Levi doesn’t seem concerned by the new tension in the woods and puts the gun away. I wasn’t upset, I was just a little shocked. It’s the end of the world, people die and people turn against other people. I’ve already seen evidence of what happens when a man is cornered or scared…or threatened…or challenged. I’d already seen the horrible things that this new world has done to turn the sane into monsters. I’d seen people be killed… I’d seen everyone I’d loved killed – I was on the verge of becoming one of those monsters…

That’s how Levi had found me just a few months ago…

This new world pushed you to extremes that you didn’t realise you could reach. It made people take action in ways that they could never have imagined of taking before… But not for Levi…

This was normal…

This was his life…

And for a while, I forgot that’s who he had been…

He’d told me a few days after we’d first met that he didn’t mind getting his hands dirty. ‘They’re so dirty already, I haven’t seen my skin in years kid, it makes no difference now…’ He wasn’t a bad person, he was just prepared to shoulder the unfathomable, so that others didn’t have to.

It was the action of a leader, the weight of the world perched on his shoulders…

“Furlan?” I look up suddenly to see Levi staring at me, his eyes now holding a hint of concern – how long had I been stuck in my own thoughts? “You alright kid?” I nod my head slowly, my mind quickly coming back to the situation. It was the way the world worked, and I wouldn’t want to have to face it with any other man. I nod my head more convincingly.

“Yeah! Yeah…” Levi’s eyes soften, reminding me that he was still the same man I knew and trusted…the same man who cared – he was just angry. We’re all angry. Ravi is probably treating Hange back at camp as we speak, stopping her from bleeding out due the dead man’s actions. I look around me and notice that Reiner and Connie were nowhere to be seen. “Where-?”

“I sent them back to camp to inform Erwin that we have…” Levi considers his words. “…acquired an asset…” He doesn’t give me time to finish the question, seemingly aware that I hadn’t been paying attention whilst it was happening.

“What are we gonna do?” I set my shoulders straight and remind myself that I need to pull myself together. A lot had been happening…

“We’ll take him back to camp to ask him some questions. It doesn’t seem worth hiding the location from him since it’s quite obvious that wherever he came from already know where we are.”

“Do you think there’s a lot of them?” Levi doesn’t look up at my question and walks forward, pulling the knife out of the tree. This causes the now partially beat up man to fall to the floor. Levi must have got a kick or two in whilst I was spaced out. He looks at the knife for a second and his face takes on a pained expression - here one second and gone the next. He puts the knife away.

“I don’t know… but it’s probably best to assume that if they have expendable men to risk sending out here, the chances are there’s more of them then there are of us.” I didn’t like the sound of that.

“Y-you gonna kill me or what!?” The man, now slouched at the base of the tree, seems to have used up any energy left to beg. He’s accepted his fate – which doesn’t bode well for questioning. If he already knows he’s going to die, why would he give us any information? Levi slowly crouches down to be level with the beaten man, making him shrink back against the tree. It still amazed me how a man lacking in a few inches in height, can make up for it so immensely in presence.

“I wasn’t planning to…unless you’re particularly taken to the idea.” Levi’s tone is back to its usual flat stoicism. Even though his words seem like they would be teasing, part of you expects him to follow up on his words there and then. The man shakes his head quickly.

“No no…nononon, I-I don’t… what do you want with me, what are you gonna do to me…p-please, please I beg you…?”

“Jesus Christ, you make it sound like I’m some dodgy sadist fuck…” Levi shoots his arm out and yanks the guy’s head to the side by his hair. It reveals a shoddy tattoo of a crude take on a unicorn inside a shield. “…I believe that’s _your_ leader’s M.O.…” Levi actually smiles at that, but it holds no pleasure, or happiness. It was a smile that says ‘Yeah, I know what the fuck you are, you know who the fuck I am, and I’m pissed…’.

 

(Mikasa POV)

We manage to get Hange into a stable position between Ravi, Nanaba and myself, keeping her shoulder levitated whilst we carry her back to camp. It’s not easy with the bumpy terrain and I have to work hard on keeping my mind focused on the task at hand.

“What’s gonna be the next course of action when we get back?” I distract myself by asking Ravi.

“We’ll have to settle her down, so I can remove the bullet. We don’t want it to be in there longer than necessary…and obviously I need to seal the wound as soon as I can, something I can’t do until the bullet’s out of there…”

“Are you worried about the amount of blood she’s lost?” Ravi looks tense for a second, then takes a deep breath, risking a glance in my direction before avoiding another overgrown tree root.

“With a wound like this, it wouldn’t usually be so bad, but it hit her artery pretty bad. That mixed with how long she’s been out here…we’ll have to see how she fairs during the extraction. If she loses too much more, we’ll need to find a way of replacing it.”

“So we have the equipment for that?” I pinch my eyebrows together, thinking back to the lack of content inside the medic tent.

“It doesn’t require much, I have what would be necessary from when the hospital was first ransacked for goods. The only thing I don’t have…is blood…” We finally reach a level ground when my foot stumbles, shocked by a loud shot through the trees.

“What the hell!?” It was another gunshot… who was it? Who fired it?

Are they okay?

Is Levi okay?

“They must have reached the men who did this…” Erwin stops in front of us, his face sullen but confident in the people he sent off to get it done. I look up at him and take a step forward, my hands still supporting Hange’s limp body.

“Why would a shot have been fired though!? What if one of them is hurt, or…or-”

“Mikasa…” Erwin holds a hand up to me and I have the right mind to shove it back in his face – but neither of my hands are free. “I can assure you that Levi would not allow anymore people to get shot on his watch…unless of course he was the one doing the shooting…” The last part sounds somewhat sinister but I choose to let it slide.

“Okay, but since when were you so confident in Levi’s ability to protect, huh?! Last time I checked you were the one always bitching about pitching into this fucking community, talking out of your ass-”

“Mikasa…” Ravi says my name firm but calmly. “This isn’t really the time, I’m sure they’re all fine…” My eyes don’t stray from Erwin, but I nod my head. I start forward once again but the blond giant stays put, seemingly preparing to say something more – not that we have the time.

“I’m sorry…” _That_ I wasn’t expecting. “You’re right, I’ve given Levi a hard time, but I have known him and known _of him,_ much longer than yourself and so I know who he was…but I do recognise that he is _now_ a crucial element in this camp’s survival. I have my reasons as to why I don’t always trust him, but I shouldn’t have been letting that cloud the bigger picture of what this world has become.” Before I can say anything in response, not that I think I could, Erwin turns around to continue back to camp. Ravi and I follow suit, carrying Hange, walking the rest of the way in silence.

 

 

We gently lay Hange down onto the bed inside her campervan. It was the second time I’ve been inside the thing since I arrived, the first time being my first day – right after Levi saved Eren and I from the mall.

Feels like a life time ago…

As soon as we have her down, Ravi runs back to the medic tent to gather his supplies. I sort out some blankets around the bed and gingerly take a seat by its side. I look behind me and take in the rest of the small space. There was a table at the other end with seating edged all around it, covered in a thick seventies style cushioning. I knew that if it ever rained too hard in the night, Hange let Levi sleep in here, probably spread out on that seating area. I imagine he _loved_ doing that, sharing a room with Hange. It was a funny thought – the both of them staying up all night talking about random shit and Levi telling Hange to shut up or he’ll throw one of the heavy set cushions at her.

It was a nice picture to paint…a safe picture…

I let a small smile play on my lips and take in the rest of the room. Most of it was full of clutter. Books, paper, clothes, anything Hange can get her hands on, I imagine. She likes to keep track of everything that she sees and everything that happened around camp. I look down at her, her face pale and shirt more red than blue now.

Please be okay Hange…

“Okay, I think I have everything…” Ravi comes up from behind me and I quickly move out of the way, letting him take my seat beside the bed. “I’m going to need some help, can you go get Nanaba, she’ll be good for some extra hands.”

“Of course!” Ravi looks up from what he’s doing around Hange’s arm and gives me a tight look.

“Are you okay?” Me?

“Yeah, I’m fine, I mean-I’m not, I’m fine, I just, it’s a lot… you know?” I feel quite flustered and my head aches, but I’m not the one bleeding out or getting shot at.

“Everything’s going to be okay, Mikasa, and Levi is fine.” I stop in my tracks to give Ravi a small smile.

“I know…” Ravi glances down at Hange’s wound then back to me before I can go out the door.

“You any good with this kind of thing, ever had any medical experience… I could really do with any help I can get.” My hands shake for a moment before I can control them.

“Yeah, I can…I can help, my father was a doctor and I used to help stitch Eren up a bit…” I nod my head, biting my bottom lip.

“Okay, good…” And with that, I leave the tight space of the campervan to be met with the scene of Erwin being ambushed by Connie and Reiner.

What the hell’s happened?

“Nanaba…” I turn to her by the side of the fire pit and gesture to the van behind me. “Ravi’s ready for a few pairs of extra hands if you’re okay with that. I’ll, uh…” I look back at Erwin and see Connie gesturing wildly to the woods, his hands flying in the air before acting out someone falling to the floor. “…I’ll be there in a minute, okay…” I watch Nanaba go to help Ravi and make my way towards Erwin.

“-the guy seems like a bit of a common thug, but he might have some useful info as to where he came from…” I walk in on the middle of the conversation. Erwin notices me from the corner of his eye but doesn’t say anything, turning his attention back to Reiner.

“And what does Levi want to do?” Since when did the tough prison guard wanna listen to what Levi wants to do?

“He was gonna start bringing him back here, maybe we should meet them half way…” Bring who? I step further into the conversation and decide I need to know what the fuck is happening.

“What the hell happened out there, why was there another gunshot!?” The three men turn their gazes onto me and Reiner starts to explain.

“We caught one of them…we’re gonna-”

“ _One_ of them, how many were there?”

“Only two…”

“And what happened to the other one?” Connie steps forward, interrupting Reiner before he can answer the question.

“He’s DEAD!” Connie takes a dramatic step back and takes out an invisible gun, pointing it into the distance, then throwing his arms into the air. “Just like that!! Down!!!”

“What happened…?”

“Levi shot him, he was the one who shot Hange and Levi decided that we only needed the one for questioning – best not let the other back to their camp and tell them what happened. It could lead to quick retaliation…” Reiner looks at me with an expression I can’t figure out, but my minds too caught up in the story to worry about it.

“Is Levi-?”

“Levi’s fine…” I nod my head at Reiner and take a deep breath.

“Okay, well, you should probably go help them then, I’m glad everyone’s okay.” I smile, and Reiner seems kind of relieved for some reason. Did he think I’d be upset? Scared? Angry?

Disappointed?

I watch the three of them run off back to the woods. This was all so crazy. For a few hours I’ve managed to actually forget about the flesh-eating creatures outside of camp. But at what cost?

My friend being shot and a new, more powerful threat…

Humans…

 

(Levi POV)

“Keep fucking walking…” I shove the MP bastard in front of me, watching my own footing around the unstable terrain.

“Why are you taking me back to your camp? Seems a little careless, don’t you think?!” The guy’s voice is grating to my ears. I can see the opening to the edge of the woods and kick my foot out, causing the guy in front of me to fall to his knees. I don’t respond to his question and walk around so that I’m stood in front of him. Furlan hovering in my prereferral.

“Well, you already seemed more than familiar with the location over the past week…” I kneel down in front of him, hearing footsteps coming from the camp, hoping it’s Reiner and Connie with Erwin. “…So, what’s a little invitation once we’ve finally become properly acquainted?” I smile at the kid, which just makes him sink lower to the floor. He couldn’t have been much older than Connie or Furlan– making him a kid to me. Young and naive enough to be dragged into Nile’s shitty influence, but old enough to still be held accountable for his shitty actions. I’ve watched kids younger than him do horrible things with no remorse – because their leader said so… I sigh and stand up, turning around to see Erwin approaching.

“This him?” Erwin wastes no time, I cross my arms and raise an eyebrow.

“No, this is just the local fucking paper boy…” I give Erwin an unimpressed look. “…Yes, this is one of the fuckers whose been sneaking around our woods.”

“ _Your_ wood?” The kid barks up at me. “It’s a free country, asshole!” I don’t humour him with a response and look up at Erwin, my arms still crossed.  

“He appears to have grown a pair of balls in the last few minutes…” I glance down at him, then back to Erwin. “I can assure you that they were nowhere to be seen earlier on in our interaction.” Erwin actually gives me a small smile and looks down at the kid on the floor, his hands tied behind his back with some makeshift rope.

“We’ll tie him up just outside of camp and then find out what we can…” Erwin frowns down at the bruised body and makes his voice lower in the short space between us all. “I hope you’re feeling talkative young man…”

 

We lug the ‘young man’ to the edge of camp as instructed and tie him to a thick maple tree. Furlan goes over the ropes which Connie fetched from camp and silently humours the other boys nonstop chattering. Reiner watching on, a concerned look on his face. I stand up straight and turn to Erwin, I need to ask about Hange – but before I can, Erwin gets his questions in first.

“The other guy, dead?” I dip my head to the side in a condescending manner and cross my arms against my chest once again, feeling the MP knife in my belt.

“Yes…”

“Because you shot him?”

“That’ll do it…”

“He make a run for it?”

“Don’t they all…?”

“You make sure you got the head?”

“I’m not a fucking novice Erwin…” Eyebrows stays quiet for a second and seems to consider me for a moment. It unnerves me, and I await the stiff reprimanding.

“No, you did the right thing Levi.” I did the what now? “We can’t afford to be light about this…” I quickly get rid of the surprise that must have snuck onto my face and adjust my footing.

“Well, we’ll get what we can from this guy but he’s just a lacky, Ni… _whoever_ he serves probably doesn’t give a shit about him. He probably doesn’t know that much.” Erwin nods his head slowly and glances to the lacky in question. “How’s Hange?” It was my turn to ask some questions.

“She’s… Ravi’s working on it…” I take a step forward, the vagueness of his answer filling me with a panic that I immediately replace with anger.

“What the fuck does that _mean_ eyebrows!?”

“She was unconscious when I left but Ravi was about to work on taking out the bullet. Once that’s out they can stitch her up. The only problem we might have is the blood loss…” I close my eyes for a moment, then feel a heavy weight on my shoulder. I open my eyes to see Erwin’s hand resting there, a closed look on his face. “You should go check on her and we’ll cover this for now.” I look up at the larger man and let a scowl flit across my face.

“What gives Erwin, you’ve stopped treating me like a piece of degenerate shit wrapped in an orange jumpsuit suddenly. Have I missed something or has the world finally reached the pinnacle of fucked up?”

“We just need to work together for now Levi, I realise that…now go back to camp. We’ll fill you in if anything comes of it.” Erwin gestures over to the kid trapped to the tree, Connie sniggers over something Furlan muttered whilst tightening the binding. I nod my head and turn to see Reiner stood stiffly to the side.

“Braun, you alright?” Reiner looks up at me, seemingly shocked at being addressed and runs a hand through his hair. It doesn’t take me long to figure out what’s going through his head. We’ve got a bunch of MP thugs running around our camp, Reiner’s old family, and now he’s teamed up with the enemy. And not just the enemy, the leader of enemy’s.

“Yeah, I’m fine, just-”

“Hey!!” We both turn to look at the MP kid on the ground. “I know you, _Braun_ …” He says the name like it’s a bad taste in his mouth. The kid smiles for a second and it comes out rather sadistic. “You know what Dok does to traitors, _Braun_?” His words are slow, enjoying watching someone else’s pain for once. Reiner blanches and I take a step in front of the little shit, kneeling down once again to grab his hair, lifting up his head to look into my eyes.

“Well, I sure hope you’re gonna say ‘greets you back with cuddles and forgiveness’, otherwise, it’s not gonna be a fun trip home for you when we’re done.” That shut him up and I stand to leave. Giving Reiner one last nod before I go.

Braun was one of my men now…

And no little shit is gonna threaten my men…

 

(Mikasa POV)

Ravi manages to get the bullet out but Hange loses a lot of blood before he’s able to suture and patch up the artery and close the wound. She woke up for a minute in between, the pain pulling her out of unconsciousness long enough to shout out in the small campervan and then pass out again. The repair wasn’t as up to scratch as we would have liked, but it was the best Ravi could do given the circumstances.

Hange’s still pale and the blood loss has got Ravi worried, she needed a transfusion. Nanaba leaves the van and Ravi quickly runs back to his own tent to clean his hands. I sit beside the bed once again, the commotion mostly over, but we weren’t in the clear yet. I grip onto Hange’s hand and I’m sat alone for a while in the silence.

I let my eyes travel over the walls, lined with various newspaper clippings and drawings. There was a calendar at the base of the bed, each month adorning a different cute kitten in some overly cutesy pose. I use my free hand to flick through the months – Hange had been keeping track. It was October now – what used to be my favourite month. I go through the later months to come and notice future dates circled, some for supply runs, some for when supplies will run out. She was micro-managing everything behind the scenes. I get to the end of the calendar and it’s December.

What would Christmas be like during the apocalypse?

I look over the date and notice it circled as important, but not for the baby Jesus… _'LEVI BIRTHDAY!!’_ it read in Hange’s scratchy handwriting. Levi’s birthday was on Christmas day? No wonder he was so cranky all the time… I take note of it and hope that maybe, if all goes well, we’ll last that long…

And I could get him something nice… maybe more tea?

I’m so tired but I manage to keep my eyes open, not wanting to miss any signs or problems. I think about checking outside when I feel a light squeeze in my hand. I look up to see Hange’s eye’s flicker open. It was weak, but still a good sign. She must be in a lot of pain, so I grab the meds Ravi left beside the bed in case she woke up before he got back and help her swallow them. It wasn’t easy as she can’t sit up but it’s better than letting the pain build up.

“Hey, how you feeling?” I keep my voice low and take her hand again. Hange nods a little and lets her eyes flicker shut.

“Not…too bad…” Her voice is scratchy and quiet, but it’s there.

“Good…I’m so glad you’re okay, Hange.” I hear footsteps behind me and turn around to see Ravi. He looks pleased that Hange’s come back around.

“Hange?” Ravi moves to stand beside me and kneels down beside the bed, making sure she can hear him. “Hange, I know you need to rest but I need you to tell me your blood type…?” I grip her hand a little more when there’s no response.

“Hange…?” I lean forward a bit and see her eyelids flicker.

“B…”

“B?” Ravi nods his head and starts to stand.

“N-negative…B-B negative…” Hange turns her head gently to face me and she actually smiles a little, which immediately makes her wince in pain.

“B negative, thank you Hange, that’s really helpful…” Ravi smiles back at Hange then turns to me. I catch a concerned glint in his eye before he’s able to leave the campervan again. I hear talking going on outside and assume that Ravi’s discussing the new situation with Nanaba.

“You’ll be back to your normal self in no time Hange, got it?” Hange’s eyes seem to look passed me and I’m not even sure if she’s heard what I said.

“Levi?” I look down at Hange and see her eyes light up.

“Levi? He’ll be back soon Hange, he’s just-” I feel a soft hand trail across the back of my neck, making me snap my head up.

“Levi?!” He looks down at me and my stomach flutters. He smiles, his hand never leaving the back of my neck, before looking down at Hange. His smile doesn’t go but his eyes drop when looking at his pale friend.

“H-hey Levi…” Hange says it with more spark than I've heard from her since she was shot. Her eye’s staring up warmly at her friend. “…I surviiiiived…” She tries to say it in her signature singsong voice but it catches at the end, her smile fading. The tension in the room was still there, everyone more than aware that things weren’t so clear cut yet.

“Yeah you did…” I get up from the chair and let Levi take my space beside Hange’s bed. He takes the hand I had been holding and I watch Hange grasp it back this time, her eyes brimming with water she can’t really afford to lose right now. “You’re gonna be fine Hange…” Levi’s voice is low and it’s almost hard to watch.

I knew they were friends. Looking past all the bickering and threats, Hange was the closest friend Levi had in this new world. For a little while I started to envy Hange for that closeness, but then I realised that I didn’t want the relationship they shared. I wanted something else from Levi, something that I wasn’t even sure was obtainable…

Watching them now, Hange was on the verge of breaking, and she was looking to her closest friend to keep her together. She was scared…I’m scared…

I don’t want her to die…

Infection, blood loss leading to organ failure… the variables out here were too much…

“You ready?” I spin around again to see Ravi, holding a few bits of equipment, a thin tube and some…needles?

“Yeah…” Levi says it in a sigh and looks over to Ravi. I watch the two and step out of the way for Ravi to get by.

“Usually I’d do the two separately but since we don’t have masses of time I’m going to do the transfusion straight across, if that’s okay with you?” Ravi glances up from sorting out the needles and Levi shrugs, seemingly not caring about what Ravi was doing – as long as it gets done.

“You’re giving Hange your blood?” I look down at the small tube now connecting the two. Levi doesn’t answer, but he doesn’t really need to. Hange turns her head again and opens her eyes, voice low and scratchy still.

“Awww, Levi, y-you shouldn’t have…” Levi let’s out a humorous chuckle.

“So you’re compatible, B negative?” I ask and Ravi finishes setting up the transfusion, making to leave the campervan.

“I’ll come back soon to check on you both…” And he leaves the three of us alone. Levi sighs again and adjusts himself on the chair, letting his wrist sit upwards beside Hange’s on the bed.

“O negative, I’m compatible with everyone…” Levi says it and closes his eyes, running a hand through his hair. A small, weak chuckle comes from Hange.

“Th-that’s…more than we can say for your personality…” I smile at her comment, glad that she’s feeling well enough to make jokes.

“Shut up shitty glasses…” Levi says it with an affection only he could fit into an insult and Hange seems to drift off to sleep, the pain meds finally kicking in properly. I watch the two for a moment and wonder if maybe I should leave.

“I can go if you’d like some peace…” I go to take a step back, but Levi grabs my wrist before I can, gently pulling me back towards him.

“You don’t have to go…” Levi looks up and I can read the silent plea inside the offering, ‘don’t go’…I take a step forward and cup Levi’s face in my hands, gently lifting his head so I can look into his eyes. They were tired, and worried… and beautiful…

“Every day that I know you…” I keep my voice low, but make sure that my sincerity is clear. “…you never stop amazing me, and I hope you realise how lucky…and _happy…_ I am, that this messed up world brought us together…” I smile, running my fingers up through his hair. “And even after all of this…your hair still looks pretty damn amazing, if I say so myself…” Levi smiles back, and for a second…

Everything feels like it’s going to be okay…

 


	18. Trust

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heeeey! I thought I'd give you guys a nice RivaMika chapter before I make shit hit the figurative fan XD  
> I honestly found it harder to write the whole showing affection and talking feelings stuff harder than the zombie/angsty shit so I really hope it's okay!!  
> Thank you SO MUCH for your continued support and wonderful comments!!!  
> Next chapter, we head back into action so, enjoy the peace whilst it lasts... <3333 Also this chapters all from Mikasa's POV and slightly shorter than usual, which wasn't intentional but just kinda how it worked out - Levi POV will be back next chapter...  
> Enjoy!

(Mikasa POV)

“I think that’s probably enough, Levi…” Ravi disconnects the tube running between Hange and Levi and wraps a small bandage around their wrists. Hange had regained a lot of her colour and Ravi insists that her vitals will be stable enough to leave her over-night. Levi on the other hand…looked more pale than usual.

“Careful…!” I quickly grab hold of Levi’s side to steady him as he stands up from beside Hange’s bed.

“He’ll be a little unsteady on his feet…” I look up to Ravi as I wrap my arm around Levi’s waist. “…make sure he rests tonight, he gave more than he probably should have.” I nod my head and slowly start to manoeuvre us out of the cramped campervan. Levi felt warmer than usual and as soon as we step out the door, I know that the cool air was a much needed reprieve. We start heading off towards the far end of camp towards mine and Eren’s tent.

It must be getting quite late as most people have settled in for the night and I spot a couple night patrols off in the distance. I glance to the side to check to see how Levi’s doing and notice the front of his T-shirt still splattered in Hange’s blood from earlier and dirt from their ordeal in the woods.

“Why don’t you head down to the lake and rinse off a bit, it’ll help cool you down and… put the day behind you a bit more…?” I slowly remove my arm from around him and take in his pale complexion. “Can, uh… can you walk on your own?” I don’t take my hand off of him, still clutched in the side of his shirt.

“…Yeah…”  Levi’s voice was quiet, not small…just…tired. I still don’t feel overly comfortable, or convinced, on letting him go off alone and look out for someone who could help.

“How’s it goin’ Mi-ka-saaaa!?” I spin my head around to see Connie and Sasha walking towards us, probably heading back from their patrol.

“Hey, Connie…could you guys do me a favour?” Sasha’s eye’s light up at my question and Connie throws a jellybean in his mouth.

“Depends…” Connie dramatically takes another jellybean out of the bag and inspects it critically. “…what does this… _favour_ , entail?” I send a glare in his direction and watch him gingerly throw the candy in his mouth.

“I want you guys to watch Levi for me down by the lake whilst I go get him a clean shirt and talk to Erwin.” At my response they both perk up.

“Please don’t leave me alone with them Mikasa…” I glance down at Levi’s strained voice, his eyes pleading. “…they won’t stop talking, I don’t think I can deal with that right now.” I let out a small chuckle and send him an apologetic smile.

“You love them really and you know it…besides, I won’t be long.” I let Sasha support some of Levi’s weight and watch them head down the hill towards the lake. I knew that both Sasha and Connie were more than happy to help Levi, because whether he liked it or not, they thought of him as family now.

He was important to everyone here at camp…

I head back to the campervan and let myself inside. Hange was sound asleep and Nanaba was sat on the chair beside her since a quick rota had been put together to keep an eye on her after the transfusion. I briefly say ‘Hi’ and sypher through the tiny closet for a clean T-shirt for Levi. Due to sleeping on the roof on most nights, Levi had nowhere else to keep his things besides Hange’s storage spaces – not that she minded at all.

I find a plain black T-shirt, knowing it must be Levi’s ‘cause it sure as hell wasn’t Hange’s. I grab it and make my way out of the van and back into the dark evening. I spot Erwin in the distance, stood with Furlan by his side, so I run over.

“Hey, how did the…” I frown for a second and struggle to know what to say. “…um, the… _interrogation_ go? Any luck?” Furlan shakes his head and I bite my bottom lip, stopping myself from sighing. Erwin looks over behind me towards the campervan.

“The young man won’t tell us anything. He’s completely shut off from any aggressive advances we’ve made. From what the others told me, he was a lot more cooperative when dealing with Levi. I believe that we’ll have to have _him_ find out what he can-”

“Well then it’ll have to wait-…”

“I appreciate that you’re wary, but we really don’t have time to tip toe around what is the more pressing issue - …” I abruptly take a step forward and cut Erwin off as his voice begins to raise. I respect that it’s been a long and difficult afternoon and he’s worried about the camp, but I said no…

“I’m sorry, but I _said_ it’ll have to wait until tomorrow. Today, Levi has run down to catch the culprit in question, begun an interrogation and then come back here and given just over two pints of blood – _way_ more than he was supposed to given his position in the camp… _so_ , Mr Erwin Smith, if you think I’m gonna let you come waltz in here and take him away to complete whatever extraneous methods it’ll take to extract whatever answers we need from that asshole, then you’re in for a BIG disappointment.” I finish my point by crossing my arms over my chest, Levi’s shirt nestled between them, and jut my hip out. A low whistle comes from Furlan, Erwin not breaking eye contact.

“Fair enough…” Erwin gives in after a while and lets out a sigh. “You’re probably right, no use exhausting him when he’s currently our biggest asset amongst this new mess. I’ll organise for someone to watch the boy through the night and we’ll discuss Levi talking to him in the morning.” Erwin looks down at me and seems somewhat frustrated by something. “I’m sorry-…”

“That’s okay…” I don’t uncross my arms and expect him to say more.

“I have to give it to Levi…” Erwin begins to take a step back and head towards the wood’s edge. “…he certainly knows how to pick the feisty ones.” And with that he walks away…which was good…

‘Cause I kinda wanted to hit him…

“I’m glad you’re looking out for him.” I pull my eyes away from Erwin’s back to look at Furlan, whose giving me a big grin and chuckles.

“What?” I glare at him for a moment, which just makes him chuckle more.

“It’s just, uh…” He looks up at the sky for a moment which was on the verge of darkness, a faint light blue with the beginning of stars. “Do you remember…it was a while ago now, I guess, one of the first times we spoke properly. I told you that you reminded me of him?” I did remember it, he’d started off by telling me about his old milkman and some story about cereal. I uncross my arms and nod my head slowly.

“Yeah…” My tone comes out unimpressed. “I remember…”

“Well…I just think, we’ve come so far, you know…?” I glance down at the ground and hear Furlan chuckle again. “Sometimes I feel like…” I look up at him again, his tone gone cold, almost worried. “…like, he’d run into just about anything if it meant the rest of us could survive.” Furlan looks at me with a sad expression. “He’s so…f-fucking self-sacrificing, I’m scared that one day he’ll run into something, and he just won’t come back…” Furlan’s honest words send a sinking feeling to my stomach.

Because I felt the same…

Because I knew that if Levi had been here just now, he would have gone with Erwin, regardless of his own condition…

“It’ll be fine Furlan.” I say it because…I don’t really know what else to say…

You’re right?

I’m scared too?

“I know, just…thinking about it now, you’re still similar, but you’re also so different in many ways, and I think he needs that.” Furlan looks down before continuing. “I think, that if you and Eren hadn’t come into the picture…he would have done something stupid a long time ago…” And when he looks back, I see what I can only describe as gratitude in his eyes. I don’t know why…

I haven’t done anything to deserve it…

I run Levi’s shirt through my fingers absentmindedly which draws Furlan’s attention.

“You should probably go check on him, saw him go off with Connie and Sasha to the lake?” Furlan finally smiles again. “Better make sure he hasn’t drowned them both.” I give Furlan a smile back and wish him a good night. “Come find me if you need anything, or if he needs anything…”

“Thanks Furlan…” And then I head off towards the lake.

When I make it down the hill, the edge is lit up by the dawn and the beginning of moon light. I spot Sasha and Connie sitting down on the grass beside where Levi stood, running water from the lake through his raven hair. As I get closer I start to hear Connie’s curious voice, like a child talking to their grandpa, a mixture of awe, admiration and a tiny bit of uncertainty.

“What about that one?” Connie points to the lower part of Levi’s bare torso, a cute frown adorning his face.

“Shut up Connie, the man’s exhausted. You sound like a frickin’ toddler-…”

“Hey, I’m just curious, they’re cool, he doesn’t mind-…”

“Of course he minds! You’re being irritating, let the man wash in peace!”

“Jeez, alright, _mum_!”

I watch Levi ignore the younger campers arguing on the grass beside him as he uses his old T-shirt to dry his face. The dull light making his skin look even paler, but in a beautiful porcelain way.

“Hey…” My voice sounds quite quiet in the still atmosphere by the lake and Sasha smiles up at me. “Thanks for that, you guys can head off – probably want to get some sleep.” They both stand and give their goodbyes.

“See you guys tomorrow!” Connie walks backwards up the hill until Sasha hanks him forward and then they’re gone – leaving Levi and I alone. I turn around and watch him chuck his dirty shirt over to the wash bucket.

“You need to stop wearing white.” I move to stand in front of him and offer out the clean, dry T-shirt from Hange’s campervan.

“Thanks.” Levi takes the piece of clothing and I watch him raise it over his head, not before raking my eyes over anything the moon light will let me see. A flat, defined stomach with tattoos etched on surface upon surface. I understand now why Connie was so curious because I wanted to ask what each one was for and what it meant. I knew some gangs collected tattoos the same way boy scouts collected badges. Levi shrugs the top on in one swift motion, breaking me out of my thoughts, and I look back up to his eyes.

They were tired…

“How you feeling?” Levi sighs and runs a hand through his newly damp hair.

“A little light headed…” He shrugs. “…Apart from that not too bad.” Physically, he did look a little more with it, but he needed to take it easy for a little while. Although, beyond his stubborn and strong exterior, something inside was eating away at him – I could just tell…

But I know he won’t tell me about it…

“Well, you can stay in mine and Eren’s tent tonight, you’re in no condition to sleep on a roof after all that…” Levi doesn’t argue, but he doesn’t really _say anything_ – which was both very much still in character but somehow still concerning. I grab his hand without saying anything more, leading us up the hill and towards somewhere we can put this day behind us.

 

Once we get to the other end of the field, Levi’s walking beside me, our fingers intertwined properly – he still hasn’t said anything. I open the flap to the tent and immediately see Eren laying down on his front, reading one of his comics by flashlight. He hears us before I can say anything and his head shoots up, a smile lifting at the sight of us both.

“Hey, Mika, Levi!” Eren throws his comic off to the side and switches off the flashlight, making the tent settle into a softer lighting from the single electric lamp in the corner. “Are you alright?” Eren sits up gingerly and looks up at Levi.

“I’m fine, Eren…” I feel a slight squeeze of my hand before Levi releases his grip, the sudden lack of contact sending a cold feeling to my stomach.

“Um…Levi’s gonna stay in hear tonight with us, so he can rest-…”

“Awesome, sleepover-!!”

“- so he can _rest_ , Eren-…”  Eren actually looks vaguely sheepish when he smiles this time. I glance over to Levi and see a small smile on his lips – I guess really anyone is susceptible to Eren’s adorable nature. “I’m quickly going to run back to Hange’s to grab some bottles of water and check to see if they need me later on tonight…” I start my way out of the tent but glance back at my brother, now stood in front of Levi. “Find something small for Levi to eat, Eren…” I turn my attention to Levi. “…you _need_ to eat something…” Then with a weak glare, I head back outside and towards Hange’s campervan for, what felt like, the hundredth time today.

When I enter the cramped space once more I notice Nanaba still perched by the bedside, eyes half closed with various bottles and bandaging around her.

“Hey, Nanaba?” I keep my voice at a whisper as to not disturb Hange. “How long are you sticking by tonight?”

“I told Ravi I’ll do a few hours, stop about midnight ish…” She looks up at me with a tired smile. “…Sasha’s going to take over for a while after me, then Marco agreed he’d do a later shift. Ravi will come back by morning, so she won’t be on her own. Don’t worry Mikasa, you should rest tonight.” She adjusts her position on the chair to watch we walk further into the charming chaos that is Hange’s campervan. “How’s Levi by the way?” I look up from searching the cupboards and give Nanaba a small smile.

“He’s alright…” I open up another cupboard below me and spot the clean bottles of water Hange collects, grabbing a couple for Levi.

“It was quite amazing what he did…” I glance up to see her looking down at Hange’s sleeping form. “…not many people would have done what he did, especially amongst everything else that’s going on.” I don’t really know what to say to that – obviously what she says is true. I stand, the bottles nestled between my arm and my body, and I use my free hand to brush the hair out of my eyes.

“How’s Hange doing?” I started to feel a little awkward and wanted to get back to the tent - God knows what Eren’s putting Levi through.

“She’s doing alright, Ravi reckons she’ll be as good as new in no time. She’s strong, and she’s got good people behind her.” I nod my head nonchalantly and lean my hip against the side. “Hey, Mikasa…are you worried about the people, who came into the woods…” Nanaba doesn’t look at me when she asks and her voice goes quiet. “…the people who shot Hange?” I take a deep breath and place the two bottles on the side before walking up to the bed, stood beside Nanaba’s chair.

“No…” My answer comes out more confident than I really felt, but I wasn’t saying it for me. “I…” I notice Nanaba looking up at me, expectant, and I know I have to continue. “Don’t get me wrong, I think they are worth our concern, it’s definitely going to be a... challenge. But I’m not worried. I have every faith in this camp. We will figure out a way, and everything will-be-fine…” I know my confidence begins to slip in the middle but I look Nanaba in the eye.

Everything – will – be – fine…

I look down at Hange once more before turning back to grab the bottles, but not before something else catches my eye. It was one of the newspaper articles taped half-heartedly to the wall. It had a bold heading, suggesting a front page, with two columns of writing and a clear black and white photograph adorning the centre. The photograph was taken outside a courthouse on the grand steps. There were a lot of people in the relatively small rectangle, but one stood out more than any other.

It was Levi… I carefully rip the page from the wall and hold it closer to get a better look.

The black and white made the contrast between his raven hair and pale complexion even more pronounced than normal. He was wearing a suit, a three piece that fitted as if it had been tailor made. It was weird, to see Levi wearing something other than jeans and a T-shirt – the go to apocalypse attire – but for some reason this looked right. It looked like he should be wearing something like this every day, and I suppose as an organised crime syndicate leader – he probably did. Levi’s posture in the photograph was confident, even with handcuffs being held behind his back, his face still made you feel like he had it all under control. His chin was held high, but his eyes were cold – saying nothing.

I finally tear my eyes away from the picture and read the bold lettering at the top…

**_‘Notorious Rivaille SC Leader Sentenced To Minimum 114 Years In Maximum’_ **

_One-hundred and fourteen years_ …so when Levi said that he wasn’t gonna get out for a long time…?

He was never going to leave that prison…

I reread the headline three, _four_ more times, and my stomach sinks. My eyes search down the page back to the picture and Levi’s stoic expression. He didn’t look like a man who had been sent to spend the rest of his life behind bars. I think about reading the smaller print columns of the article but can’t bring myself to make out the words.

“Hey Mikasa, you alright?” Nanaba’s voice is still quiet and I jump a little at the forgotten company – completely lost in my own head.

“Yeah! Uh…no, yeah I’m fine…” I don’t take my eyes off the piece of paper and I search for any core information that might stand out to me. I notice words describing the difficult trial, the years spend trying to _‘accomplish what was accomplished today’_ , and then I find a quote – one that I kind of wish I’d heard from Levi’s mouth, rather than from this three year old piece of paper.

_‘The defendant was found guilty of over fifteen charges, these included seven cases of man-slaughter as a result of reckless contact, two cases of underground international drug trafficking across the “Golden Triangle” and Central America, money laundering of up to Seventy-five-million American Dollars, five cases of human trafficking and the attempted murder of Official Kitz Weilman…’_

I think that was enough reading…

I didn’t want to read anymore…

I gently tape the article back up onto the wall and give Nanaba a quick smile before leaving the campervan, almost forgetting the water bottles on my way out. Once I’m back outside my face cools immediately from the cold breeze. Now that the sun has gone down, I could feel the full force of autumn kicking in. I slowly make my way back to the tent, re-reading the same sentence over and over again in my mind.

I couldn’t connect them…

The Levi in that photograph, the Levi who had been sentenced for multiple charges, the Levi who was connected to something as unthinkable as murder…and human trafficking?!

I couldn’t connect _that_ Levi…

And _my_ Levi…

I stop walking for a moment and let out a sigh. I refused to believe that they were the same person, because I knew that there was no way the man they described in that paper was the same man I watched put his life on the line today for his friend.

There was way more to this than some bullshit article and some finger pointing court lemmings. The man I saw in that photograph didn’t say evil, or dangerous – it said – proud…

People in this world looked for those that could be made into villains. When they had a villain, they had someone to blame, a focus in which the evil could be contained…and someone had made sure that Levi had been painted as such.

Fuck that newspaper article…

 

I finally get back to the tent and I can hear Eren’s muffled voice from inside. The lamp was obviously still on, because it sent a faint glow through the thin blue material. The closer I get to the tent entrance, the clearer Eren’s words become, the whiny tilt in his voice recognisable anywhere.

“-really!! I can’t… refuse to…- “ I frown for a minute, trying to figure out what they were talking about, and what had Eren in such a tiff. “…Come oooooon, Levi!” I decide to finally push the pathetic flap of material we call a door aside and I walk in on Eren looking incredulously up at Levi, who of which glances up at me from his spot on the floor, a little more colour in his cheeks and a Pop tart in his mouth. The drastic contrast between what I just read and what I’m looking at now makes me want to simultaneously laugh and pinch my arm – just to check.

“Whaaatcha doin’?” I let the flap close behind me and chuck one of the bottles of water into the corner, holding the other out to Levi. He accepts the offering and continues to take another bite of his sugary dinner. And then Eren looks up at me.

“Can you _believe_ that Levi’s _never_ had a Pop tart?!” Eren turns away, his attention back onto Levi who just shrugs.

“I don’t understand what the big deal is…” He holds the colourful rectangle out in front of him for a second before taking another bite, talking around it with another shrug. “…it’s a sub-par snack at best.” Eren, of course, is deeply offended by this comment.

“You. Take. That. Back…” He puts a hand to his chest, a mocking gesture of emotion. “…I let you into my home, I feed you my precious delicacies - …”

“They’re hardly delicacies Eren - …” Levi deadpans, interrupting my brother.

“Well they will be soon…!” Eren then gestures to Levi’s upper torso, the T-shirt I picked out earlier slightly more form fitting than the last, the dips of overworked muscle showing through. “…I’m just trying to make sure you don’t waste away.” His voice is now supposed to sound sincere, but just comes across as sarcastic – which makes Levi chuckle.

It was very amusing, watching the two of them converse. They have become so familiar with one another, and it was so nice to see Eren as animated as he was before everything happened. My brother was notoriously charismatic and got along with nearly everyone he met – but few people made him comfortable enough for him to really come out of his shell. He became very good at receding into it when he was growing up. Watching Levi with him now though, made my heart beat a little faster, and I can’t keep the smile off my face. I clear my throat and start to make my way around to the other side of the tent as I start talking.

“…Well, it was very nice of you to let Levi have one of your Pop tarts, Eren.” I start ruffling through my backpack but glance up to give Levi a pointed look, which he responds to with a tired look of acceptance.

“It was, Eren, and I’m very grateful.” Levi emphasises his gratitude by finishing off the sugary snack and Eren goes quiet, his face shy. After a while though, he makes a ‘aww shucks’ gesture towards Levi and smiles.

“That’s alright, I mean…” Eren’s smile grows into a beam and he leaps forward to throw his arms around Levi’s neck in a hug. The older man loses his balance for a moment, probably from a mixture of blood loss, my brother’s momentum and surprise. “…we have to look out for each other, ‘cause we’re family, right Levi?” I watch Levi’s shoulder’s tense suddenly under Eren’s skinny arms, but it’s gone a moment later. He finally reciprocates the hug and sends me a sheepish look over Eren’s shoulder.

“Sure, Eren.” Levi’s voice is softer than before and I send him a smile back.

“Okay, Eren…” I pull my brother’s attention onto me and hold out his tiny wash bag – apocalypse or not, the big sister will insist on hygiene. “Go clean your teeth.” Eren reluctantly takes the bag and the spare bottle of water before leaving the tent. “Don’t wander far!!” I raise my voice in an afterthought. Once I got a half-hearted grunt in response, I step over Eren’s pile of blankets that just about passes for a bed and sit down beside Levi. “So, how you feeling now?” It was a safe question. I settle down on the other side of the slightly larger make shift bed I’d been calling my own.

“Um…” Levi lets out a sigh before looking at me, sending some of his longer bangs flying momentarily. “...less like I’m gonna black out, but my head is frickin’ killing me.” I frown for a moment, part of me annoyed that I didn’t grab a couple pain meds whilst I was in Hange’s van.

“You should probably try and drink plenty, you gave Hange way more than Ravi had advised.” Levi does as I say and I keep going, needing to fill the silence so I didn’t start dwelling on any other particularly jarring discoveries I’d made. “I, uh, spoke to Erwin and they didn’t manage to get anything out of the…man you caught, so I think they want you to talk to him tomorrow.” I glance up and see Levi raise an eyebrow.

“ _Talk_ to him?” I roll my eyes and shrug.

“Well, you know…in a sense. Erwin wanted you to do it tonight but I told him that that was out of the question.” It was Levi’s turn to shrug again.

“I would have done it - …”

“Yeah, Levi, I know. That’s why _I_ told him you wouldn’t.” Levi looks down at the water bottle as he fiddles with the cap. It was a weirdly anxious action, something that didn’t fit well with him. A subtle clench in his jaw comes and goes, the only other sure sign that the current situation in camp has him more on edge then he was letting on.

“How’s Hange?” It was a swift change of subject, and I let him have it.

“She’s doing well, they’ve organised whose gonna look after her through the night so…they don’t need me.” Before Levi can respond, Eren stumbles through the front, toothbrush clenched in one hand.

“There’s a lot of people on watch tonight.” My brother says it like he’s casually brought up the weather.

“Erwin’s probably trying to over compensate.” I look up as I say it, putting on a smile so Eren knows it’s nothing to worry about.

“Overcompensate for what?” He frowns and I raise my hand, pointing my thumb in Levi’s direction beside me.

“Overcompensating for the fact that he’s in _here_ …” I then point to the tent flaps. “…and not out _there_.” Eren makes a face of understanding and walks further inside to sit on his own bed.

“O-…” Eren begins to yawn mid ‘okay’. “…-kaaaaaay.” As soon as he lays down, he closes his eyes – all the enthusiasm from earlier seemingly replaced by fatigue. “Night guys!” And he was out like a light. There’s a moment of complete silence as both Levi and I share a look.

“Wish I could do that…” Levi sounds wistful and I let out a light laugh which I cover with my hand.

“What? Pass out like a lightweight on a night out…?” I look over at my brother then back. “I honestly don’t know how he does it.”

 

 

I couldn’t sleep, and it wasn’t until what must have been the early hours of the morning, that I really started to envy my brother. My mind was still going a million miles a minute. Snippets of the day flying passed like some short-lived slide show.

And questions were sitting at the forefront of my mind…

Every noise I heard outside made my heart skip and I’d be lying if my body wasn’t hyper aware of the other body lain out beside mine. It had seemed silly to make up some other ‘poor excuse for a bed’ for Levi when mine covered enough of the ground for the two of us. I apologised to Levi that I couldn’t offer him more and he just insisted that it was nice to not be sleeping on a roof for a change. I shuffle around again and lay on my back, the tiniest light from the moon seeping through the semi-transparent roof. I turn my head up to just about make out Eren’s form splayed out within his blankets on the other side of the tent, then I glance beside me, the small remnants of light letting me make out the angles of Levi’s face.

I feel frustrated – mostly because I can’t sleep – and I want to scream…

It was that kind of frustration…

I run my hands down my face, rubbing at my eyes to get rid of the non-existent signs of sleep.

I sigh…

“Go to sleep, Mikasa…” Levi’s quiet voice makes me jump, and I’m slightly taken aback when I actually _don’t_ scream. I recover quickly however and let out a low sound of annoyance.

“I can’t!” I whisper shout. “My head won’t _shut up_ …” I take a deep breath and let it out in another sigh.

“What won’t it shut up about?” I turn my head once again to look at Levi and notice his eyes still closed.

How the hell did he know I was awake?

“It doesn’t matter…”

“Clearly it does matter if it’s keeping you awake.”

“You should go back to sleep, you’re supposed to be the one resting…” I hear Levi sigh this time and I can already tell he’s ignored my deflection. He moves slightly, and I feel his arm brush my own, which just makes my body even more hyper aware of his. I can imagine he raised it to run a hand through his hair, I can’t see it in this light, but I’ve seen him do it enough times over the past few weeks that the action is burned into my memory.

Much like that article is now…

The thought of the article just sends another wave of frustration through me and I sit up, running my fingers through my own hair. The action sends my blanket pooling to my sides and I immediately feel the cool air hit my bare shoulders. It wasn’t freezing at night but it was cold enough to warrant more layers.

I should try invest in a scarf or something…

“Mikasa…” I’m pulled out of my internal to-do list by Levi. He says my name so softly that it makes my stomach twist, regardless of my other stresses. I don’t turn around but pull my legs up so that I’m able to rest my forehead on my knees.

Everything is so fucked up…

I can’t form any coherent words, everything that does appear on the tip of my tongue is immediately dissolved into nothingness – so I stay silent. This prompts Levi to sit up, I can feel the warmth of his body as he does, but I just wrap my arms tighter around my legs, burying my face deeper into the safety of my own body.

Maybe no one will hear me scream in here…

I hear the smallest sigh come from Levi’s lips and then I feel his delicate fingers brush my shoulder, which feels like electricity down my arm. I’m not sure how to cope with the feeling so I bury my face deeper, arms now tighter. If I get into a small enough ball, maybe I’ll disappear. Levi doesn’t pull away and I feel him run the back of his fingers down my arm – my goose bumps now no longer from the cold. The action is so gentle I feel my chest ache from its current internal turmoil.

“We really need to find you a scarf or something…” Levi says it almost like an afterthought, once again, a complete contrast to this man written about for the world to see. I needed to know how much of that man was real – and that made me feel guilty – because I trusted Levi…

I did - …

I _do_ …!

But now my mind is fighting that surety…

I wanted to know, not because I’m worried he was dangerous, but because I needed to hear it. I needed that reassurance to tell me the man I’ve gotten to know over the past month was real. But I was scared – scared that as soon as it’s out there, I’ll undo whatever it was that we had. I don’t know what that is – but I know that it’s one of the only things keeping me going – besides Eren.

And _Eren_ \- their relationship was so important to my brother – Levi made him feel safe. My brother thought of Levi as family, and I knew that if Eren found out about any of the things I had…

It wouldn’t change anything…

So why should it change anything for me…

It didn’t…

“… - kasa…?” I realise that Levi’s been saying my name, probably a few times whilst my thoughts were plagued by this stupid reality. I finally feel his fingers move from my arm and up into my hair to push it away from my face, no doubt trying to see my expression. “Mikasa, talk to me…” The sincerity in his voice made me want to cry, I didn’t want to scream anymore. I was caught between getting up and leaving and pulling him closer – both of which seemed like unfair responses by this point.

I finally lift my head up slightly, but I’m too embarrassed to look at him, his fingers now making their way down my arm once again. He doesn’t flinch when I sit up, or say my name again when I refuse to look at him, he just waits patiently – patiently for me to ruin whatever this is…

“If I asked why you were in prison, would you tell me?” I ask the question before I can back out, nothing else was going to come out of my mouth, so I say it as if ripping off a band-aid. Part of me wondered if he’d just flat out refuse, give me a simple ‘no’ or whether he would lie to me…

He wouldn’t lie to me…

 _‘I’ll give you any question and I promise I will answer it honestly…’_ My thoughts take me back to when we were on the balcony in the suburbs and he promised me any answer I wanted, promised he wouldn’t lie to me…

Almost as soon as the question drifts in between the space around us, Levi’s touch disappears from my skin and the knot in my stomach tightens to a sickening feeling. There’s a deafening silence and I risk a glance in his direction, catching him run a hand through his pitch-black hair – an identical action to what I played out in my head just moments ago.

“That’s what’s been keeping you awake?” Levi doesn’t sound angry, but he doesn’t _not_ sound angry – just uncomfortably diplomatic – his soft and gentle tone, gone.

“I don’t…”  I don’t know how to answer, the words catching in the back of my throat, but I shift my head around so that I’m looking in the other direction and rub a hand across the back of my neck. The next sound from beside me is a tired sigh and then Levi starts talking, quietly, almost as if he’s reading from a document.

“I was found guilty of fifteen to nineteen charges…twelve times nineteen months for man-slaughter as a result of reckless contact in connection with multiple human trafficking charges of five times ten years, two consecutive fifteen to life sentences for underground international drug trafficking across the ‘Golden Triangle’, including Burma through to Laos, and Central America, fourteen years for money laundering of up to seventy-five million American dollars and seven years for the attempted murder of the slimy son-of-a bitch Official Kitz Weilman…a total of a minimum of a hundred and fourteen years without parole or the eventual opportunity of reduced time for good behavior…” It was as if the list had been seared into his memory, no hesitation or word out of place. “You feel happy now?” The question wasn’t said with malice or contempt, but that doesn’t stop it from making my skin crawl with shame.

A small part of me had still thought he might lie, and that made me feel sick…

“Sorry…” I didn’t know what else to say. Levi had just laid out everything I wanted on a figurative platter and now I didn’t know what to do with it.

“Aren’t you gonna ask if I did it?”

No…

“…Did you?” My voice is so tiny in the silence of the early morning.

Another sigh…

“Some of it…” His answer made the knot unravel faster than time alone could have. Deep down I knew that was the case. I wasn’t going to sit here and pretend I thought he was a saint, it had been his job, but now I know that it wasn’t as black and white as the paper made it out to be.

“A hundred and fourteen years, Levi? H-how do you go away for something like that _knowing_ you did nothing wrong?”

“I never said I did nothing wrong…” There’s a humorless chuckle from Levi before he continues. “…I said I only did some of it, doesn’t mean I didn’t deserve to go away for what I did do.”

“Okay, I…I get that but, I don’t understand!” My voice raises at the end and I spin around to make sure Eren was still asleep.

“It’s complicated Mikasa…” There’s another round of silence where I don’t know what to say. I felt relieved, guilty…and angry, angry at whatever or whoever sent Levi’s life spiraling down like that. I know he’s right, he probably did plenty wrong – but that doesn’t mean he deserves what happened to him. “…Did you want me to leave?” The question takes me by surprise and I have to pause my thoughts for a few seconds before Levi’s words really sink in. My head whips up quickly and I finally look at the man beside me, my panic now overcoming the embarrassment and fear that stopped me before. He sounded genuine, like he’d leave without a second thought if I wanted – like he understood and wouldn’t really blame me if I did.

Which just made me feel even worse…

“No…” The word comes out breathy, a hint of disgust in my tone I couldn’t hide – not towards him, I think that was for me. “…No, no I…” My hand reaches out as if on instinct and my fingers curl around his wrist. “…I don’t want you to go, of course not! I just…wanted to understand, Levi.” My voice gets lower as my plea goes on, a whisper by the end. “I still do…” I move my body when Levi’s face softens, making myself face him more, the cool air still whipping around my shoulders. “Thank you…for telling me…” Levi lets out another dry chuckle.

“Why, you thought I was gonna lie to you?” He still sounded colder than earlier and I avoid looking him in the eye. My lack of response was probably answer enough. “…Because I thought about it…” That made me look up at him – and my grip on his wrist loosens sub-consciously, the knot in my stomach, back.

“Why?”

“Because I was afraid that you’d look at me, the same way they all look at me.” The coldness is gone now, replaced by such sincerity my eyes start to sting. “But then I figured, if it’s weighing on you now, you probably heard something from someone, or saw one of those God-awful articles on Hange’s wall.” I look down at that and I hear the lilt in Levi’s voice as he notices. “And I figured that lying was pointless, but for a second, I just wanted to be selfish. Keeping you ignorant was just…” He shrugs, letting the end of the sentence drift into nothing. I tighten my grip again.

“I thought you were mad that I asked…I-It just seemed that whatever’s happening now has you on edge, and I didn’t know whether it has something to do with your past or…I don’t know.” I feel like a child when I say it, as if I’d been caught covering up a mistake and then left to explain myself.

“Why would I be mad?” Levi seems genuinely confused by this, then he shakes his head slowly, a smirk on the corner of his lips. “Mikasa, I…” Levi leans forward and runs the back of his fingers down my cheek, stopping at my jaw to cup the side of my face, gently urging me to look him in the eye. “Mikasa, I already told you that you can ask me anything you want to know, and honestly, I’m a little surprised you lasted this long.” I feel my eyebrows lift in surprise then down again into a weak frown, which makes Levi smile. “You’ve known me for little under a month, and from what you know I’m an unpredictable, ex-con, post organized crime syndicate leader with little patience whose spent the past two year – pre-apocalypse- behind bars. The fact that even knowing that you were willing to trust me with your life, and your brother’s, and let me into your family… Mikasa you have every right to know who I am – I was just afraid to tell you…” I mirror Levi’s gesture, and run my own fingers along the edge of his jaw, my eyes flickering between his.

“Levi, you have more than earnt my trust, whether we’re talking about you or Rivaille. I trust what you say, I just wanted to hear it… _from you_ …” I glance down for a moment to gather my thoughts, then back up, and we’re so close I can see the walls coming down behind his eyes. “I don’t care what you did in the past, and nothing you can say now is going to scare me away…I promise.” I want to do more to assure him that, to take back anything I said that made him think I was going to go. I feel like I’d accomplished something unobtainable, something no one before me had managed to do – like taming a wild animal or figuring out a difficult puzzle. And I didn’t know whether this accomplishment was circumstantial, whether I was just at the right place at the right time, but I didn’t care. If Levi wanted a family, then he’d become part of mine, if he wanted trust then he’d have mine… I wanted to tell him all of that, but I didn’t need to.

Before I have the chance to go on, Levi angles my face ever so slightly, allowing him to lean in closer, his lips a fraction away from my ear.

“Promise?” The word is whispered, gentle, and sends a jolt through my body, my breath catching, so all I can do is nod. Up this close my mind is taken over by Levi, the smell of the outside mixed with sweat and something that’s just so undeniably him – a combination that sends my pulse into flatline. I settle my breathing and think for a moment I might be able to find my voice, but then I feel Levi’s lips on my neck and that’s that…

No more words…

Just a pathetic excuse for a ‘yeah’ that somehow manages to escape my lips in a half moan. God I’m gonna be blushing about that later – but I don’t care right now. I run my fingers up into his hair and dip my head back sub-consciously, allowing Levi easier access. I feel his free hand travel down and wrap around my waist, his fingers brushing over the strip of skin between my camisole and the edge of my jeans, making my back arch at the touch. Then his other hand moves away from my neck and loops around my other side. The coherent part of my brain senses both his hands slowly moving lower until they run under my thighs, and then I’m lifted onto Levi’s lap and my legs slip naturally around his waist.

Before I can marvel in our new position, Levi’s lips connect with mine and I circle my arms around his neck. It wasn’t like last time, before it was quick, almost as if he was testing the waters, but this time it was far more resolute. Still gentle, but now we both knew what we wanted – and life was becoming shorter and shorter. I tighten my legs around Levi and use one of my hands that had tangled in his hair to run down his front, my fingers feeling every bump and curve of his chest…

Stupid shirt, getting in the way…

I feel Levi’s lips smirk against my own and wonder for a second if I’d said my previous thought out loud. Before I can dwell on _that_ , however, Levi nips my bottom lip between his teeth, making me gasp just enough for him to deepen the kiss.

Should have known he’d play dirty…

I push back and feel Levi’s core muscles tense underneath my fingers when I do. This spurs me on and I use my other hand to angle his head up further, allowing me better access this time. The kiss deepens even further, and I don’t know how long we stay like that – but then we both seemingly pull back at the same time – both in desperate need of oxygen. I feel Levi’s heavy breathing underneath me and I accidentally let out a giggle, a sound that was so unlike me I immediately clamp a hand over my mouth. I watch a grin grow on Levi’s face.

“Did you just _giggle_?” I shove Levi with little sincerity.

“No, shut up…” He doesn’t, and lets out a low chuckle, which makes a hot flush travel down my body.

We needed to stop…

I glance behind us and spot Eren’s sleeping form on his bed. I let out a small sigh of relief.

“He always out like this?” I don’t have to look back down to know Levi was looking back over to Eren as well and I nod my head.

“He’ll be out like a sack of potatoes ‘til the sun comes up...” I turn my attention back to Levi and shrug, my left arm still wrapped around his neck. “…it was both a blessing and a curse when we were on our own.” Levi smiles warmly and I rest my palm against his cheek, becoming more aware of the time. “You should probably try get some more sleep, busy day tomorrow.”

“I suppose…” Levi lets out another sigh and in one swift motion I’m off of his lap and lain back onto the bed. I blink once and let my heartbeat slow down before turning my head in his direction as he starts talking again. “When this is all over, all this MP bullshit…I’ll tell you everything, okay?” I nod my head and shift my body onto its side so that my hand can rest against Levi’s chest once more.

“Okay…when this is all over…” I smile at him and lean in for one more kiss before we drift off for the remaining few hours of darkness.

Because as soon as the sun comes up, it was a new day…

And every new day holds new possibilities…

And new threats…

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr - if you wanna ask any questions about the fic or updates - jovialjellyfishreaper


	19. It's A Trap

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Omg! She is ALIIIIIVE!!!  
> It's true, I have crawled out of my hole to deliver this gift to you <333  
> Life has been so hectic after going back to college and I found it so hard to find time to write but I knew I had it all planned out and really wanted to get these chapters to you guys. For those of you still waiting and excited about this story THANK YOU and SO much LOVE!!! I'm so sorry for the wait but I really hope you enjoy it. It had been so long I had to reread a lot of previous chapters because I was bit like 'the hell is happening?" If anything seems a bit wrong or a bit stilted it's because it had been so long but let me know if I made any stupid mistakes.  
> Anyway, enjoy!!! and HAPPY HOLIDAYS!!!! <333

(Levi POV)

“…’bout twent…t-twenty miles out Karanese road…”

“See, now, you say that, but I’ve been out that direction dozens of times and there ain’t shit…” I release the kid’s hair and watch the blood drip from his nose. I didn’t do that…Reiner’s the one who kicked him, I merely allowed it to happen.

The kid thought he had a smart mouth…

“I-it’s a factory lot…you can’t see it from the road, you have to travel across the way in order to find it. They’ve built a fence around it, so he can keep strict patrols in and out.” I stand up and sigh. We’ve been trying to get info and locations from the little MP shit for nearly an hour and this is the first time he seems to be leading us in the right direction.

“He?” Furlan steps forward and I quickly move the conversation on before we get into name territory.

“How do we get in?” The kid lets out an abrupt laugh at my question but it sounds painful and wet in his throat.

“Y-you d – don’t get in…” He smiles, and I have to hold myself back from kicking him myself. “Only if you wanna join.” I roll my eyes at the cultish bullshit, walking away for a moment to gather my thoughts.

“Reiner?” The man looks over to me and I spare one more glance at the bruised gang follower strapped to the tree. I lower my voice. “You worked for the bastard for some time, any thoughts?” Reiner nods but frowns.

“A factory lot does sound like him, big, secure, intimidating… scary how close he’s been all this time.” I nod in agreement but suspect that the MP leader has already made his way around more locations than we could count. He was an opportunist, and a twisted one at that – and nothing said opportunity than people at their most vulnerable.

“We’ll travel up with a small team, check it out…if it checks out we’ll figure out the best course of action. It might end up being best to move, if it’s bigger than we anticipated then we can’t risk going up against them. Nile would have been building since the world came crashing down…” I look up at Reiner and see him share my thoughts. “…these people, _here_ …there not fighters, we need to get them out of here.”

“You think he’s getting ready to take them out.” I shrug but I definitely do. What else would he do with a bunch of semi-capable pedestrians.

“If he can’t recruit them, he’ll kill them – you’re either a lemming ready to butcher for the MP’s or you’re a threat to their fun.” I take a deep breath and turn back to the rest of the group. Furlan eyes up the kid who seems to be on the brink of passing out and Erwin begins walking towards me, probably ready to grill me for plans and schematics.

“What are we thinking?” I look up at him and cross my arms.

“I’m thinking that some A.I. apocalypse would have been so much easier…at least the dipshit survivors wouldn’t stand a chance against robots, leaving the rest of us to struggle in peace.” Erwin seems unimpressed by my useless response and waits for me to adjust my answer.

Sigh…

“It seems like it could be legit, I think we should check it out and if it’s out of our hands then, Erwin – we gotta move, like…” I gesture my hands out dramatically to the side. “…really fucking far away.” He nods in understanding.

“Okay, you’ll assemble a group, how long do you think it’ll take?” I think for a moment and tilt my head to the side.

“Maybe a day, twenty miles isn’t that far at all in a vehicle, but chances are we’ll need to go on foot partial way in order to avoid being seen in their territory.” Erwin nods and I list a group of names in my head, ready to prepare everyone for a rather unappealing trip towards the unknown.

I leave Erwin to sort out the now unconscious MP and I head back to camp to gather my group together…

 

“You can’t be serious?!” I pick up my newly sharpened knife and a jacket, carefully weaving around the very angry Mikasa in front of me.

“Of course I’m serious…” I stop moving and give her my serious face which she responds to by crossing her arms and scowling.

So I scowl back… we were pretty on par with the scowling…

“Look, we could do this all day…”

“Then let me come with you!”

“No!”

“Please…! Why not?” I start walking away again but she grabs my jacket and makes sure to stand in the way. “Why are you leaving again?” Mikasa goes quiet, the fire and anger sizzling away in the matter of a breath. “I – I don’t understand.”

“Mikasa…” I take a step forward and run my fingers along the curve of her delicate jaw and up into her dark hair. “You know the answer to that…this is the world we live in and it’s never gonna stop.”

“But… - “

“And you know why you can’t come with me… you have to stay here with Eren, because if we both went and neither of us came back…” I let the sentence finish there because it wasn’t necessary to go on. Mikasa knew, we both knew…that this was a risk, and everything, us… was probably a mistake from the beginning. “Besides, I’ll be back before you know it…” She lets out a huff of air, disguised as a laugh.

“And if you're not?” I can see the water shining in her eyes and I tilt her head down, taking another step closer. I let out an exaggerated sigh and put on the most flippant tone I can muster.

“Well that’s just ridiculous.” Mikasa laughs for real at my nonchalant hand gesture and I smile, because that’s the face I wanted to take away with me.

“I’ll see you later, yeah…promise?” I pull her in for a quick kiss and I can feel her hands intertwine into my shirt, pulling me closer.

“Promise…” As we begin to pull away I hear a sharp whistle to our right and I look up to see Furlan assembled with the rest of the group I’d requested: Reiner, Richard, Connie and Sasha. There will be six of us altogether, Reiner for the inside knowledge, Furlan as my right-hand man, Connie and Sasha because I know they can handle it and I trust them… and Richard volunteered.

“You love birds ready ‘cause we got some MP ass to kick!” Connie does a weak attempt at an air kick and Furlan ruffles his hair as he walks passed, making his way towards us.

“Don’t worry Mikasa…” He throws an arm around me and smiles brightly at the woman in front of me. “…we’ll make sure nothing happens to him.”

“Thanks…” She smiles back and I let her hand go, making my way to the truck. I turn my attention to the group in front, Erwin hanging off to the side waiting for me to get the metaphorical ball rolling.

“Ladies!” Everyone jumps to attention. “The plan is simple, we’re driving the nineteen miles up then walking up through the terrain surrounding the factory plot. The road is long with heavy surveillance, we don’t stand a chance in hell if we approach them from that way. We’ll head up from the back, there’s a lake not far off and I think that’ll serve for a good recess in blockage. The MP’s will see the body of water as a natural deterrent and should be an easier approach.”

“Let’s go!” Furlan starts loading everything into the back of the truck and everyone jumps in. I check my gun and run my fingers through my hair.

“WAIT!!” I spin around in time to see Mikasa frantically catch Hange before she tumbles to the ground. I run over, rolling my eyes until I see the back of my head.

“What the fuck Hange, you’re supposed to be in bed!?” I didn’t even know she was this conscious yet. Mikasa supports her, throwing Hange’s arm around her shoulder and holding up her waist.

“I can’t believe you were gonna leave without saying goodbye, I always send you off if I’m not coming, Levi! It’s tradition!” You could tell that Hange was trying to use her usual level of excessive enthusiasm and volume but her voice came out scratchy and weak.

“I’m sorry Hange...I - …” Before I can finish, Hange flings her semi-deadweight body at me and I have to adjust my footing. Mikasa keeps a hold of her waist, taking some of the pressure off of Hange’s wound and my now rather unstable stance.

“Be careful, okay?” Hange’s voice is muffled against my shoulder and I can’t help but roll my eyes once again – more of an endearing gesture than anything else.

“You know it Four-eyes…” Hange stands up and wobbles slightly, forcing Mikasa to take another step closer to keep her upright whilst Hange leans closer to me.  

“We are connected more than ever Levi, you know that right…?” I raise a confused and slightly concerned eyebrow.

“Uh…huh…?”

“They told me what you did…” Hange places both of her hands on my shoulders and looks at me with what I assume is supposed to be sheer intensity (but just kind of comes across as confusion and a concentration to not pass out). “…you helped save my life by giving me some of your own - …”

“Hange I don’t - …” She cuts me off when I try remove her weak grip that had slipped down to my biceps.

“No, Levi, your blood is running through my veins…don’t you see, we are connected, like…like…” I’ve started to think maybe Ravi gave Hange something for the pain before she sprinted out here. “…we’re practically family now Levi, and I can’t lose my brother…”

“Brother?”

“Yeah…we’re like…that close…don’t you think…” I make a strained non-committal noise and glance at Mikasa who appears to be trying hard to suppress her laughter.

“I’ll…” I shrug and throw my hand out. “…maybe stretch to distant cousins.”

“I’ll take it!” Hange lunges in for another hug and I’m more than aware of everyone else still waiting for me in the truck – no doubt entertained by Hange’s half-drugged rambling and my obvious display of discomfort.

“Come on Hange, Levi’s gotta go…” Mikasa eases her arms under Hange’s and pulls her off of me.

“Yeah, be careful there Hange…” Connie’s voice rings across the camp and I take the opportunity Mikasa gave me to get away. “…don’t be too touchy feely ‘cause Mikasa will start getting possessive.” I give Connie a look and he skulks back into the truck.

“Alright let’s go.” I hop in the front and Furlan starts the truck up, ready to go. Erwin leans down into my window and I can alrighty recite the speech he’s about to give me in my head.

“Remember…” Be careful, no unnecessary risks. “…you all be careful, don’t take any unnecessary risks, only approach when it’s safe…” We’re out there for information, we’re on the defence. “…you’re there to gather information, don’t forget that. You’re not there to fight, we just need to know how to defend ourselves.” Blah blah responsibility, blah blah dangerous. “These people count on us now, they’re our responsibility and it could get dangerous.” See you in blah blah hours. “….Thanks Levi…and I’m sorry.” I perk up in my seat, that part was new. I choose not to say anything and I nod my head. It was an olive branch and I didn’t trust myself to not grab it and snap it in half.

I was good at that…

With one last ‘BYE!’ from Hange we were off…

Get any information and get out…

 

 

Furlan (POV)

“Jesus, how didn’t we notice this when we came out here before?” I pull up about half a mile away from the lake. We drove around the outskirts of what we presumed were the MP’s borders and the factory sat slap bang in the centre of discreetly placed fences and monitored patrols. Various bits of junk scatter the sides of the road and upturned cars have been placed subtly in the way of obvious turn offs. I stop the engine and spot a guy two-hundred yards off with a beanie hat and a hatchet.

“If you’re not looking for it then it’s easy to miss, that’s what Ni -…” Levi sighs and continues on. “…that’s what they want. Create organised chaos amongst chaos and nobody will notice.” I glance at Levi and see him eyeing the figure walking away in the opposite direction, assuming he’s an MP out on his rounds.

“I guess…” I turn to the rest of the group and notice Richards pale face. It’s the first time he’s properly been out of camp in a long time and you can see the scenarios going around inside his head. “It’ll be fine.” I look him in the eye and he nods. I hear Levi get out of the truck and signal for the others to follow suit.

“We’ll make our way around the west side of the lake, assuming the last patrol was a good mile out from the factory, if I were to set up a stable patrol you’d have a three over five, that makes five lots of three men every three-hundred fifty yards, starting at roughly five-hundred plus apart…at least. We’re on the outskirts here so if we wanted to get through we’d need to hang on this assumption which, if we’re careful, we should be able to avoid being seen easily….” Levi looks over at me and all I can really do is agree.

“Sounds… good” I catch Levi roll his eyes at me and a small smile plays on his lips.

“You gotta start thinking like a leader Furlan…” He gives me a look I can’t quite pinpoint and I get this small sinking feeling in my stomach. “…you never know when people are gonna have to count on you.” And with that we set off.

We make our way around the lake as Levi suggested and it’s completely quiet, three-hundred and fifty yards in and we watch another out of sorts, black clad figure with a hatchet saunter through the undergrowth. They walked with a lost expression, almost as if they weren’t really sure why they were there. As we get closer, subtle waves of shouting and revving engines fill the still air. Every so often a gunshot goes off and everyone stills.

“Maybe it’s a car backfiring…” Connie squeaks from behind a rather sad looking bush.

“Oh yeah, ‘cause the roads are just chocka blocked, head to tail light, all the way up the road.” Sasha kicks him and I watch Levi give them both a look that shuts them up quick. I look around the rapidly closing vastness of the fields around us as it becomes denser with rubbish and fences. You can tell people were here only a few moments ago because empty cans still sit on precarious surfaces with cigarette butts glowing in the damp leaves.

“Do you think we should split up, cover more of the perimeter to see if we can find anything?” I wait a second for a reply and check on Levi to my left. He doesn’t respond, his gaze stuck on the direction of the last figure, then he looks out over the looming factory now in our sights. “Hey?” I catch his attention and I can see his face purposefully go blank when he looks at me. “Everything alright?”

“…I don’t know…” We keep our voices low as to not concern the rest of the group. I try to see what it is that Levi sees, it’s like he lived in a whole different world and so he notices things that you wouldn’t even begin to see on your radar.

“You think we should turn back?” Levi actually acknowledges my question this time but it wasn’t the kind of response I wanted.

“I think you guys should turn back…”

“What!?” I crouch and move to perch beside Levi where he’s ducked behind a set of rusting barrels. The barrels were littered across the plain in small increments.  “You can’t be serious!?” Levi raises an eyebrow and smirks to himself.

“Déjà vu…” He looks away, then back, his face back to the mission. “You’ve seen this layout, they’re way bigger than we prepared for and…and something doesn’t feel right.”

“But you can’t really expect us to just up and leave you here?” He shrugs and doesn’t take his eyes off the new patrol  in the distance making his way towards us.

“Worth a shot…fine, we’ll keep going. You’re right, we’ll split up and see if at least a couple of us can get inside…” Part of me is surprised he actually did here my initial question, but the other part of me knows he’s always paying attention. “…We just need to find out what they’re doing, what his goal is…” He looks at me then and I can see a battle going on inside him. “…honestly…” He sighs. “…I think I’ve seen enough and we haven’t even gotten anywhere inside yet, we need to up and leave, take the camp and get the fuck out of here.” I take a deep breath and try to form a coherent next move.

“Okay, so…that’s what we’ll do…” I look up at him and know that without a doubt I’d jump off a frickin’ roof if this man told me it was the best idea. “If you say that’s what we need to do then we’re getting the fuck out of here.” We both nod and turn to head back to the rest of the group. “Just out of curiosity…what doesn’t feel right exactly?” We get to the others and Levi signals our trek back to the truck.

“Mission’s off?” Richard doesn’t get a reply and they all follow without further question. Once we’re back on track Levi walks back beside me and lowers his voice.

“It was just too easy… too quiet,” He looks up at me and I catch the smallest glimpse of concern. “…don’t you see it?”

“But we did everything you said _because_ it would avoid us being seen and avoid any problems, doesn’t it seem like it was going well, I – I don’t see how…”

“A factory full of forty to fifty men, strict patrols and eyes at every entrance, we should have run into someone more…challenging, something was supposed to go wrong, something always goes wrong…that’s how you know it’s going right…” I shake my head, finding it hard to understand Levi’s logic.

“I don’t see how you can think like that, just because something’s going smoothly it means it’s going wrong? It’s not working? It doesn’t make any sense.” I hear Levi sigh and the others behind us continue to follow regardless. Levi slows down and keeps his voice low.

“In times like this, dealing with people like this, you need reassurance from the knowledge that the world around you, around _them_ , is going on as normal. The fact we didn’t come across any spike in patrols or the fact that we didn’t see any considerable activity at all….Furlan that’s weird and Nile wouldn’t just let a massive fucking base like that be covered by some clueless, headless chicken assholes with hatchets…fucking _hatchets_ Furlan…” We get to the clearing of the lake and the truck isn’t too far off. The argument with Levi took me away from our journey back and I’m surprised when I realise how far we’d come. No stopping, no obstructions…maybe Levi was right.

“Whose Nile?” I watched Levi slip up with the name a few times already and I can tell it’s what had him on edge.

“It doesn’t matter.” I sigh.

“Fine, so what, you think it’s a trap…?”

“I think that if I was aware of a camp not miles away from mine, I would give a few more shits about my patrols. I think that I wouldn’t rely on some assholes with fucking melee weapons. I think that I’d -…” Levi stops suddenly, and I put a hand out to warn the others.

“What?”

“I… I think that once I’d cornered my prey into a corner, I’d wait for them to panic and pounce back…then I’d go for the jugular.” His words send a shiver down my spine.

“And what? Our camp is the jugular?”

“No…no don’t you see…I’m the jugular. They’ve been scouting out our camp for days, knowing that we know, knowing that we were going to get more and more worked up until, eventually, we’d have to go check it out. Recruit a bunch of useless thugs and eventually one of them is gonna fuck up. Lure our weak spot out into the open and then tear it out.”

“I’d hardly call you a weak spot…”

“No, it’s not the weak spot because physically it can’t keep up, it’s weak because without it, everything else will fall apart and spill out.”

“What’s going on?” Reiner steps forward, interrupting our harsh whispers and Levi looks away, not wanting to let the panic be passed to the others.

“We’re just going to head back to camp.” I try keep my voice calm and collected. Levi obviously thinks that this Nile guy is onto us and so we need to leave immediately.

“It was stupid…” Levi runs a hand through his hair.

“What…what was stupid?” Sasha’s voice is quiet after Levi’s, timid in question.

“Coming here, it was stupid and I shouldn’t have brought you all with me…” Without any more he turns around and begins walking the rest of the way back to the truck.

There are no patrols in sight…and no signs of life anymore, until we clear the corner…

And there stands the truck… and a man, surrounded with at least fifteen other men, guns and all… they definitely weren’t clueless assholes with hatchets.

“We’ve been so excited to welcome you inside…Rivaille.” The guy smiles and the men are pushing us to the ground before we have a chance to react. I feel the dirt scrape along my jaw and spare a glance up at Levi who hasn’t been touched. He stands with a muted expression, apart from one small element, no concern, no fear and no fatigue, just pure contemp.

“Nile…”

“Well I suppose we have some catching up to do, don’t we…old friend?”

I can just about hear Reiner grunt from beside me and then my vision is filled with the sole of a shoe…

I guess it was a trap…

And then just darkness…

 

(Mikasa POV)

“When do you think they’ll get back?” Eren takes another sip of his warm squash and I look up from my knife. It was getting sharper with the flat rock I’d found down by the lake.

“Probably just later this afternoon…if everything goes smoothly.” I give Eren a small reassuring smile but I know it doesn’t reach my eyes. I look back to my knife.

“I wouldn’t worry about them…Levi knowns what he’s doing, he always knows.” My brother’s words are full of such admiration it would be hard to argue, and his confidence makes me feel a small sense of calm, but it doesn’t last long. I glance up at the sky and see the small gathering of dark clouds coming in from the west.

“You’re right…” I look back to Eren. “…I’m sure there’s nothing to worry about.”

 

(Levi POV)

“Now imagine my surprise when one of my men tells me that Rivaille was, not only _alive_ , but shacking up with a bunch of everyday useless field folk just down the road…” We’ve been lead into the thick of the factory, everyone led by a gun to their back and scrapes down their sides – apart from me – no one’s touched me yet, except to take away my weapons. Nile walks up front, gesturing as he goes and I take in as much of our surroundings as I can. I don’t know where he’s taking us and with the ten to fifteen odd men pointing their weapons at us, I wasn’t about to question it. “…I just had to find a way of getting your attention.” Reiner and Furlan keep their eyes scanning the area but I can tell the others are scared.

This was a really stupid idea…

“I’m flattered you missed me that much.” I humour Nile with a response and he stops walking, marching back on himself so he’s stood in front of me. As the only one without their hands tied together my fingers twitch to do something, to fight – to kill – heck just a punch will satiate something. When Nile stops just inches from me I know he enjoys the feeling of towering above me. It wasn’t a new approach and, quite frankly, one I was used to. Even with this ‘advantage’, Nile’s men lift their guns, concerned for their boss’ safety which makes me question again why I wasn’t shackled with my hands at my back.

“Can’t argue, you made life that little bit more exciting, ai? Levi? We had some fun...” Nile’s face turns to a greasy grin and I resist the urge to take a step back from his rotten odour.

“Aww, now Nile, no one’s supposed to know about that part of our relationship…” I grin back and watch Niles face turn to a look of disgust at my insinuation. Before I have a chance to deflect, he takes a swing across my face and I somehow manage to keep my footing.

“Shut up…” I carefully wipe the blood that begins dripping from my lip and can’t hold back the laugh that comes out. He was still so easy to wind up. I slowly raise my hands and make sure my grin pisses him off even more.

“Can’t believe you’d strike an unarmed man, Nile. It was just a little joke…we did have fun though, and you know… I’m not mad anymore, I’ve had a lot of time to reflect…” My hands stay up in front of me and I watch Nile’s face start to blanch at my tone, the initial humour gone. “…prison lets you do that, it lets you stew in your anger until it eventually becomes something else altogether.”

He ignores my comment, turning back to the front and we begin walking once again in an over organised fashion through the dark, damp halls of the building. My mind races with plans, escape routes and opportunities that could arise. The armed men make it hard though, I had a reputation, but I wasn’t indestructible. I catch Furlan from the corner of my eye and he nods, it was a simple gesture that told me we were gonna be good.

But Furlan didn’t know Nile like I did…

“I know it’s not as lavish as your last cell, but I can assure you…” We’re filed into an empty room with metal walls and questionable stains trailing down the ceiling. “…if these walls could talk.” Everyone is pushed against the wall and shackled tighter before being kicked to the floor. At least five men stand around me, the barrels of their guns never leaving my direction and I’m finally kicked to the floor myself. My knees give way, and someone grabs my hair from the back, forcing me to look up. Nile’s face gleams in the artificial light. The pain flaring through my skull is distracted by the gag violently strapped around my mouth, making my neck twist further back. My hands are being held by something weak and I can still feel the knife that was overlooked before, settled in boot.

“How strange, to see you so submissive…like taming a wild animal, such a pitiful display.” With my mouth covered I can’t tell him ‘fuck you’ like every cell in my body tells me to, and I want to check on my camp mates, but the angle of my neck is still stiff due to Nile’s fingers scratching through my hair. “I thought we’d have a little chat whilst I have you, didn’t really have the chance before you were…locked away.” The binding around my wrists is loose, whoever tied it must have been in a rush…or nervous. I try to say something around the gag in my mouth but all that comes out is a muffled huff. Nile smiles and swings my body around, throwing me against the wall. I land in-between Reiner and Sasha.

“Levi…” I hear Sasha whisper it but I don’t look at her, in fear of drawing any of the attention away from myself. I didn’t want him paying them any attention. Nile approaches me and rips the gag away from my mouth.

“What was that my little raven?” He smiles again, and I focus on getting my last few fingers out of the binding. I catch my breath a little and gaze up at the men who’ve beaten and captured my friends purely because they feel it’s their God given right to be massive pieces of shit.

“I said…” I blow my bangs away that have started to stick to my forehead. “Fuck you…” I smile, and with that I get another punch to the jaw. My gag is put back on tighter.

“You always did have a way with words Rivaille…” More blood fills my mouth that I can’t spit out and I cheer with silent victory when my right hand comes loose, seeking the knife in my boot from behind. I straighten up slightly with my back to the wall. I didn’t want to waste my only chance and needed to make sure I figured out the easiest way to get us out before I started anything.

My head hurts and my mind threatens to go to darker places, ‘what if’s’ and scenarios I can’t prevent. I see Mikasa’s face and then Eren’s…I close my eyes for a second to switch off any internal distractions.

“Levi…are you okay…?” It was Sasha again and she sounded so concerned, I let my eyes open and settle on her.

I nod my head because that’s all I can do, but I hope that it’s enough to settle her down.

“Don’t worry sweetheart…” Nile’s voice sends a sickening feeling to my stomach. Not because it sounds different, or because of what he says…it’s because it’s not actually directed at me this time. He gestures for one of his men to stalk forward and the man takes a clump of Sasha’s hair in one hand, using the other to run a finger down her pale face.

“It’s so nice to see you’ve made friends Rivaille…they really seem to care…” I don’t take my eyes off of Sasha who squirms more under the MP’s touch. My fingers twitch and I settle my heartrate, turning my anger onto Nile. “Calm down, calm down…” Nile grins when all I can do is essentially scowl – my fingers twitch more around my knife. “I won’t let them hurt your friends…not yet at least…” He turns his grin onto Sasha and I hear Connie start to say something from her other side, but Furlan stops him.

Thank you Furlan…

“We could have a little fun, promise we’ll be gentle.” The MP crowding Sasha slips his hand lower, his eyes boring into hers. “…unless she likes it rough…” My grip on the knife tightens and my leg muscles twitch, but before my body reacts I hear Reiner chime in.

“I wouldn’t do that if I were you…” My eyes stay trained to the floor, but I know Nile’s turned his attention now to my left.

“And why can’t my men have a little fun, is that a threat…a threat from a Rivaille wanna be, or your second betrayal as an MP?” Nile jumps a step to his left and holds his hands behind his back. “You think I didn’t notice my insignia on your neck. Don’t flatter yourself, I don’t give a fuck who you are, but once that marks on your body, you belong to me!” He starts to shout towards the end but Reiner doesn’t flinch, staying quiet and composed.

“I just don’t think it’s a good idea, it was more like a… warning…” Nile scoffs at Reiner’s warning and makes a flippant gesture towards his MP with Sasha still in his grasp. Once given permission the man pulls Sasha up the wall and slips his hand down her body and under her shirt.

“You get your fucking hands off her!!” Connie’s voice echoes off the metal walls and Sasha cries against the hand held against her mouth.

“Levi…!!”

My body reacts at the sound, blood rushing to my muscles that push me off the ground. It happens in a matter of seconds and I kick the man’s feet out from under him, my now free hand twisting his torso down to my level and I shove the knife into his skull. As the body collapses I already sense the other men coming towards me from behind and I shove the first into the wall, the thud of his body covering up my knife going into his skull. Two down. Another hand grabs my shoulder and I flip round, slashing across the jugular, the man spluttering as he collapses, and I send the knife into the third skull of the last two minutes. If you didn’t get the brain, they’d just come back. As I turn around I know all guns are on me and I take the last opportunity to send my knife into the forehead of the MP stood directly over Nile’s shoulder.

Four men down... not bad…

The sounds of guns loading goes through the silent room and I briefly take in the mess I just made, and then Nile’s wide eyes. I hold my hands up in the air and the blood of the third guy trickles down my arm.

Gross…

“I told you it was a bad idea…” Reiner sounds very matter of fact, with just a hint of smug.

“Weilman, clear this up…” Nile orders his men to start dragging out the bodies. “…don’t take your aim off of him!” He turns around and before the men can take the last body away, Nile bends down to take the knife out of his skull. I don’t lower my hands, my breathing hard and head swimming from the adrenaline. The taller man makes his may towards me, the anger clear in his gaze. “And who the fuck patted him down!!?” The MP men all blanch as they remove the last guy's body. Nile turns the rest of his attention back to me and he chuckles, a humourless, empty chuckle.

My gag was starting to chafe…

“I suppose that was on me…it’s been a while and I guess I almost forgot…” He inspects the knife and carefully wipes the blood off with his shirt. “…you’re the monster, not me…and I need to be careful.” Two men push behind me, and my hands are tied with rope this time, tighter and more uncomfortable. I’m pushed to the floor and my back scrapes along the wall, the blood of the guy I killed smearing down my arm. Nile turns to leave, his shoes clattering against the hard floor.

He pauses…

“Kill one of them…” And before I can do anything an MP points a gun at Connie…

And it goes off…

“NO …!”

There’s a silence in the room, like no one dares to breath and I hear Sasha strangle a cry. I look up to see Richard slumped in Connie’s lap, a bullet wound leaking down his back and into the middle of the room.

“Well would you look at that…” I look at Nile and he smiles fondly. “…Do you raise them to be martyrs, Levi…or do you just attract that kind of person? Never mind…best start gathering some more men to take a visit back to your little field you call home.” And with that Nile leaves the room, leaving five men still pointing their guns and a sick feeling in my stomach.

“Richard?” Connie’s voice is small and he slowly edges the larger man off of his lap. The younger boy clearly slightly in shock. Richard was an asshole but volunteering to help on this mission was an obvious step towards being a better one, a better campmate. He just wanted to help and be part of the group.

Now he was dead…

“He still has a family…a wife, Jesus he’s got a kid…” Furlan helps Connie lay the man down and attempts to calm the boy down. I wish I could say something but the gag just makes my words hollow. My limbs ache and my pulse freaks out over the near miss of losing someone close.

But Richard deserved better than that…

“Thank you.” Sasha’s small voice interrupts my thoughts and I look up to see her wide eyes watery but strong. She looks up at the men in front of us for a second, then gingerly edges closer, her hands still tied up at the front but loose enough to grapple with the gag around my jaw. Once the fabric falls off I take a deep breath. “Thank you…” She says it again. “For helping me… we’re gonna get out of here, right?” I really didn’t know, but I still nod my head.

“You’re gonna get out of here, I promise…”

I just had to get them out…

 

A few minutes go by and everyone’s calmed down after Richard saved Connie’s life, throwing himself in front of a frivolous bullet. I lean my head back against the wall and try to gather the tethers of an idea…but I was on the edge of blind panic. I needed something…anything.

I feel a light bump to my left and look over to see Reiner who had inched himself gradually closer until our arms brushed side by side.

“Any ideas?” I sigh and let the rest of my silence give Reiner an indication of what’s going on inside my head. I hear him chuckle. “That bad huh?” I turn my head to the side and give him a look that said it all. “Well…” He was still smiling. “…like Nile said, he needs to be careful. I just watched you take down four armed men in the matter of seconds, gagged, and with a shitty knife…” He lets out another chuckle and looks away. I start to close my eyes when I feel something being nudged into my hands from behind. A sharp blade scraping against my palm.

“When?”

“The second guy you took out that slid down the wall behind you, I snagged the knife out of his belt when everyone was watching you slit the jugular of the next guy.” I look at the blond next to me and let out a small smile. “Now let’s see what you can do with that knife.” I lean my head back against the wall and let the new adjustment in the situation settle into my mind – this I could work with. I slowly get to work at the rope behind my back. All I needed to do was get a hold of one of those guns.

Get the others untied – one gun each – they can get out…

“Sasha, I need you to come a bit closer, so I can undo your binding…” I keep my voice low and I already feel her nudging closer, no questions, no pauses. She just does as I ask. Once I feel her arm brush my own I angle the knife and slice it through the tough plastic, my own hands still angled from the thick rope binding my own wrists. Now it was Reiner’s turn. Sasha keeps her arms and wrists together, showing no sign that she’s now free. I glance up at the men by the door and they show no impression of suspicion or general concern.

Which is weird considering I just murdered four of them only moments ago…

Reiner angles his body more towards mine which allows me easier access with the knife. As soon as I hear the subtle snap and the blade gives way I start work on my own rope. Quick and small movements make the rope burn against my wrists, but they get looser by the second. Reiner shifts away slowly, and I catch footsteps walking towards us. Looking up, one of the MP’s raises his gun and the other men behind him stay where they are.

“So you’re the great Rivaille? The feared and the revered…” He looks me up and down, making sure to use his height and looming presence. “Can’t lie…I kind of expected more, looks like just a pretty face to me.” My small movements behind my back don’t stop but I make sure to put a smile on my face. Sasha and Reiner at my sides with the new means of escape. “Billy was a mate of mine, you know…” He inspects the blood smeared down the wall behind me. “He was smart, good fighter…”

“Well he couldn’t have been that good…” The guy’s eyes darken in front of me and I feel the first length of rope fall from my fingers. “…or his insides wouldn’t be smeared on the wall behind me, would they?” The atmosphere in the room gets noticeably tenser and I notice Reiner and Sasha edging further away, ready for something to happen. Furlan and Connie must catch on because they sit up straighter.

“What the hell did you just say…” The second rope length falls to the floor. “…you little fucker?”

“I said…”

The last rope falls, and my hands are free…

“Your friend didn’t really stand a chance.” As soon as the words are out of my mouth, a hand strikes out, clutching the front of my shirt and I keep my hands strictly behind my back – knife clutched tight in my grasp. The others don’t react because I haven’t told them to, no signal, no action – we just wait.

“You think a little shit like you stands a chance in this place!?” The guy lets his gun lay limp in his free hand and I wait patiently for his face to get redder and his body to get closer.

“I think a little shit like me just sent four of your mates to hell…” He leans closer. “…I mean, if you think about it, they should thank me really…better down there than up here…” The guy snaps and reaches out once again to scream in my face and I use his unbalance to pull him down and shove the knife into his head.

First one down…

Reiner and Sasha jump up as soon as I move, I grab the gun from the now dead guys body and shoot the first two guys by the door. Reiner manages to grab a second gun flung across the floor and between us we take out the last two. Once the five men are down I skid the knife over to Sasha and she quickly begins to get Furlan and Connie free.

“Someone would have heard the gunshot and so we’ll be bombarded again in a matter of minutes. We need to get out now. We’ll head down the East side of the building, I noticed gardens and laundry lines set up all along the building which could aid in a cover. More manual and domestic workers will gather around the area which should make it easier to get through, lessening a risk of violent threats. Might be smart for us to split up, that way at least a few can get back to camp and warn Erwin that Nile is too prepared and ready to head into our camp and attack.” Shouting starts down the hall and I pick up two more guns, throwing them to Connie and Furlan. Sasha passes me the knife and I make sure everyone else has a weapon.

“How we splitting up…?” Reiner puts his back to the door, ready to stop the first assault. I run a hand frantically through my hair then decide to go with my gut instinct.

“Reiner, you’re with me. Furlan, Connie, Sasha…I want you guys to use the East exit, Reiner and I will make more noise and lead them away.” Furlan gives me a hard look but doesn’t argue – he knows there’s no point. “If you guys get back to camp before us I need you to tell Erwin that he should take the camp and move far up North. It’s away from here and from the city. Reiner and I’ll try catch up but don’t hold down any immediate action if we don’t, understood?” The other three look at me with wide eyes and Furlan seems paler than before. “Understood!?” I didn’t have time for panic or pause.

“Understood!” And with that I signal for Reiner to open the door… and we set off.

 

The others set off east after we take out the first lot of MP’s, the weaker men sent to take quick care of the difficult prisoners – so much for that. Part of me felt slightly insulted with the lack of heavy duty procedures out in place. It’s one thing to be underestimated once, but twice…

Reiner has my back as we make our way in the opposite direction, our weapons poised and ready for any on coming attacks. I stick my knife in an MP monitoring the next corner and we hear fiery shouting coming from where we just left. Nile probably just discovered our recent departure. I make sure to make a bit of noise, the more likely they are to come for us, the less likely they are to head towards the other three.

“We better hurry…” Reiner pulls my attention back to our new destination. “…because I get the feeling that next time he catches you, it won’t be so easy.” Reiner was right, I’d pushed my luck on account of it getting us out of here, but if I get caught again, I know it’s not gonna end pretty. We get to the end of the corridor and…

…dread is a funny thing, at first it feels like ice going through your veins…

Then you get this rush of heat burst through your chest, not like the warmth of seeing someone you love or laughing so heartily you know that it’s vibrating through your entire being – no, this heat is like searing fire. It makes you panic, then it makes you act. Reiner and I stood in front of a dead end, floor to ceiling metal walls lined our only way out, and the only other direction is back…

Where the footsteps now thudded towards us…

“I’ll go back, you can hide out in one of these rooms and I’ll make sure to get them out of the - …”

“No, Levi… we split up once, now we’re a team, you’ve got me ‘til the end my friend.” I take a wobbly breath and silently thank Reiner as we turn back the way we came. We know we don’t stand a chance, we’re gonna be caught – but if it means the others will get home, then it was worth it.

“Well, didn’t get far, like rats in a cage…” Nile barges to the front of his men and knocks Reiner out with the butt of his gun. “…where are the rest of you!?” I let out a sigh and smile, the news that the others hadn’t been caught was enough to make the next blow to the head that bit more tolerable.

 

The last thing I remember was a cold metal ground before I wake up with my arms above my head and my head pulsing like a frickin’ freight train.

“Wakey, wakey, rise and shiney…!” Nile’s voice makes my muscles hurt from its impulsive reaction to lash out, but everything hurts. I open my eyes and notice a new room, similar to the last, but this time it had various implements connected to the walls. My arms were suspended above me and shackled to the wall. My legs were tied and tired but just about keeping me up, if my legs gave way now my arms would strain against the metal shackles and I could already feel the damage done from whilst I was passed out. I look around and notice Reiner slumped against the wall, his eyes were half open but he wasn’t tied down or bound up. “Almost slipped through my fingers again there, Rivaille.” Nile paces up and down the room and I notice he’s the only other person inside, no more MP’s – just the three of us.

“You know me…” My voice was scratchy and low. “…never one to make it easy.” He lets out a gruff burst of laughter and grabs my hair, lifting my head up to look him in the eye.

“Funny man, now… you’d think one hundred and fourteen years in prison would destroy a man’s sense of humour. Mind… I suppose you only got the chance to actually do a couple before you were let out.” Nile makes a show of fixing a gun in his pants before continuing and Reiner sits up a bit straighter against the other wall. From here, I can already tell he hasn’t got enough in him to move yet. “Now what I really want to know is how it feels to go away and serve time for something you know…you _know_ you didn’t do? I can only imagine the anger that swells inside you.” He drops my head and I feel the thudding of a headache flicker through my vision. “Walking around and having people point fingers, calling you a monster…well, it’s not too far off, but the _things_ Levi…the things they blamed you for.”

I know he’s just trying to get a rise out of me and if I weren’t so exhausted I know it’d be working, but I try hard to focus on the goal of getting out, of getting Reiner out.

“What did you think about whilst you were locked away there…?” It was a mocking question and Nile’s face only aggravates me more. “Did you repent any? Did you regret any…? Did you think about Isabelle?” The mention of her name sends a shock through my system and I pull down on the shackles. My impulsive response makes me angry because it just tells Nile that he touched a nerve. “Oh dear, now if you’d only taken better care of your family, all of that mess could have been avoided.”

“Hardly seems relevant now…considering the state of the world. Prison or not, the dead still roam the earth and you’re still a piece of A list shit…”

“I suppose…but in a way, wouldn’t it have been nice to spend your last few years of structured society with the ones you love, with your family and your loyal, loyal men…how are they by the way?” He kicks at the ground, pretending he just remembered. “Oh yeah, no…guess you haven’t seen them in a while. Such a gallant and noble act though, Levi, taking the blame for so many horrible acts - _that you didn’t even do_ – just so the rest of your men wouldn’t risk prison. At the end of the day, moral of the story is…” Nile leans in close and grabs my jaw with his filthy hands. “…keep your fucking nose out of other people’s fucking business.” He lets me go and takes a step away, flinging my head to the side.

“I wouldn’t have given a shit about your _fucking business_ if you hadn’t hurt her!!” I hated how effected I was by his words and I hated how obvious I made it for him to see that.

“She was a fucking nuisance, she was making things difficult, just as you’d taught her, I can only imagine. She died because you didn’t teach her how to know her FUCKING PLACE!!” There’s a tense silence before Nile continues. “Your men got involved in something WAY BIGGER THAN THEY COULD HANDLE just because Rivaille gets too FUCKING CLOSE. She was just another SC and you risked everything. You got too involved and… you know it already, so…” He shrugs. “…you were a scape goat, you got done for the trafficking, you got done for the bribes…sixty percent of your sentence was paying for the MP’s crimes. But the funny thing is it didn’t take much, did it, people already saw you as a criminal, the jump to monster really wasn’t difficult for most people. Oh but no, honourable Rivaille couldn’t have possibly let his men suffer for something they didn’t do, so you took aaaall blame…ALL OF IT!!” Nile takes one last step forward and spits down by my feet. “You’re bloody lucky this apocalypse happened because I was more than ready to watch you rot away in that cell.”

It was funny, because he’s right…

I was more than ready to rot away in there as well…

 

(Mikasa POV)

“Mikasa!!” I try to open my eyes and peer up at the sun getting lower in the sky. I sit up and spot Erwin marching towards me. I wonder what the hell has his shoulders so stiff.

“Yeah?”

“Men have been spotted out by the far clearing, do you think you could help me and a few others make sure it’s nothing too serious…I’m starting to get concerned about the others.” Erwin’s words voice my own fears, the sun was getting lower and there was still no sign of Levi’s group coming home.

“You think it’s the MP’s still?” It was a stupid question, of course he did…heck, I did.

“I’m just thinking maybe we should start preparing the camp for a bigger shift than we initially expected. If the others have been captured or…or worse then we can only expect the next course of action is taking out the rest of us. Levi made it quite clear that the MP’s weren’t gonna play nice and we don’t live to serve them anything, so we’re merely a source of previsions and an obstacle for their next stop.” I nod my head and check on Eren over by the tent. He was reading a comic and I promised that we’d take a wonder this evening when Levi got back, he was getting agitated stuck in camp. I know he’s worried too and I don’t really want to go off and leave him to worry about me as well.

“Do we know if the men by the clearing are heading towards camp?”

“No but I think we should just be - …” Erwin stops abruptly, his words interrupted by a loud course of shouts and commotion on the other end of the field.

“What…?” Erwin and I share a look until we hear the names.

“IT’S FURLAN…”

“FURLAN!!”

“CONNIE, SASHA…”

It didn’t take much for us to start sprinting towards the shouting, Erwin stops by the fire pit where people have begun to accumulate, and I spot Furlan’s tired face amongst a swarm – my eyes darting through the crowd…

Searching…

“What happened?” Erwin stands at the front and I feel Eren cling to my side, taking action the same time the rest of us ran over here. Furlan looks up to Erwin, Sasha and Connie still shaking with adrenaline behind.

“We’ve got to go….w-we’ve got to get out of here, now…!” Furlan gestures wildly back to the truck.

“What do you mean, Furlan, what happened, where’s Levi?” Furlan ignores the question.

“They’re coming! The MP’s are coming and Nile’s not gonna leave a single body unturned…Erwin…” His voice drops and he shares a quick look with me, our eyes meet and my body goes cold. “Levi and Reiner are still there, and I don’t think they’re coming.”

_I don’t think they’re coming…_

I feel Eren’s hand by my side and the touch is like a cold shiver…how…but…?

“What, w-what happened?” My voice is quiet but it doesn’t go unheard. Everybody seems to hold their breaths, almost as if they were waiting for me to explode.

It’s not the time to explode…

“We need to figure out our best course of action…” Erwin steps up immediately and I wait for him to go on, but then I look up and see him waiting for me. I give him a questioning look. “Any ideas?” He wants my help?

“I-I, uh…well, I guess first we need to gather everyone w-who we deem most vulnerable and they need to be headed up North as soon as possible, North will take them away from the MP’s and the city.” Furlan nods his head quickly as if he’d had the plan together already.

“No, yeah…” He smiles at me. “…that’s what Levi said to do…” The name makes the numbness drift back quickly, but I push it away.

“Then everyone else needs to stay and we’ll keep them around camp, we’ll fight and make sure they don’t trek on towards those that get away.” I look to Erwin and he nods, a serious expression in place. He sends a hand out in a signal gesture and gets everybody to start gathering everything as soon as they can, the noise of engines is starting to get clearer in the distance. As people begin to disperse and blights of panic start around the camp, he turns to me and sets a hard hand on my shoulder. “We will get through this… we will fight…”

“And we’ll get him back…” I get my freshly sharpened knife out of my belt and hold it tightly in my hand. “Time to kick some MP ass…”

 

(Levi POV)

My head is getting heavier by the second and Nile’s words have sent my emotions into a spiral. One part of my brain is stuck, dwelling on the past and those I lost, and the other…the other is stuck on those I’m about to lose.

“My men are already on their way to your little camp and there’s nothing you can do this time, no fighting, no great sacrifice. You’re going to die here, cold and alone…and I will relish that I was the one to make the great Rivaille scream in agony.” I try to lift my head and watch as Nile takes a few steps back. “Your friend here is one of mine…” He turns to Reiner who shifts at the attention he suddenly receives, still no rope or binding keeping him down – just his pure lack of energy. “And so, he’s the one who’s going to kill you - …”

“No…! N-no, you can’t, I won’t do it…!!” Reiner’s quick and weak response makes Nile Dok laugh with such intensity you can just tell he’s thoroughly enjoying it.

“Oh, but you will…” Before Reiner can refuse once more, Nile takes his gun out and fires a bullet straight into Reiner’s thigh, hitting the femoral artery as blood courses immediately down his leg. “I’d say you’ve got a couple minutes before he bleeds out…” Nile shoves the gun back into his pants and makes for the door. “…then about twenty minutes before he turns.” I look up at my shackled hands and watch as Reiner weakly clutches his wound.

_A couple minutes before he bleeds out…_

_Twenty minutes before he turns…_

“Good luck…” And then the bastard leaves, the door slamming shut behind him. The air is hot and sticky, and the sounds of Reiner’s restless breathing breaks the silence.

“Reiner…?”

Nothing…

I watch as the blood drips down the curve of the cemented floor to the small drain in the centre…

“Reiner…?”

_He’s the one who’s going to kill you…_

“REINER…!!” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr - jovialjellyfishreaper


	20. Nothing Left

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 20!!!  
> Omg I honestly can't believe I've written TWENTY chapters for this thing!!!  
> Thank you so much to everyone who leaves such beautiful and lovely comments - every kudos means the world and I'm so happy that people still enjoy where this train wreck of an apocalypse is going XD 
> 
> I wanted to mention that I've actually edited the rest of the fic - going through the older chapters to adjust a few bits and just generally make it flow better since I feel like my writing's improved a fair bit since then. Just to let you know in case for some crazy reason you want to relive this weird ass adventure ever again <3 hehe  
> As per usual let me know if I've made any silly mistakes...
> 
> Anyway - really hope you enjoy !!!!- it's a really long one too since I knew where I wanted to leave it <3

(Mikasa POV)

We needed to get everyone out of here now. The cars in the distance were no doubt on their way here and they were MP’s.

“Mikasa…” I spin around to see Hange, a low expression on her face and I glance down at my brother by her side. Her hand rested gently yet reassuringly on his shoulder. “We’re ready…” I nod my head and kneel down in front of Eren, running my thumb over his grubby cheek. I’d decided that I wanted Eren to go with Hange. She was in no condition to fight so it was the safest option – also I trusted her.

“You’re gonna be alright, okay…Eren…” I smile but I know it doesn’t reach my eyes. The rapid thumping of my heart was filling my ears, my mind trying hard to resist the feeling of being stuck underwater. Everything was happening so fast around me and I knew that for some reason…these people were looking to me for help. Eren looks down and I can see the shaky breaths going through his body.

I didn’t want to leave him…but I didn’t have much of a choice…

We’d come here as strangers and they had taken us in, welcomed us like family – and family we became. Everyone in this field had watched mine and Eren’s backs, fed us, clothed us and gave us somewhere to sleep where we felt some semblance of safety.

“I don’t want you to stay behind, y-you should come with us – what if Levi…- ?”

“Eren…” I take hold of his hand and make sure to keep his attention on me, the camp still moving rapidly around us. “I need to stay because these people need our help…” I bite my lip and let my mind drift to Levi for one second – just enough to think about what he might say… “It’s okay to feel scared, and yes…there are bad people out there and they’ve hurt us, a-and…and they’ve taken from us…” I shove Levi out of my mind. “…and now we need to make sure they can’t do any of that again.” I stand up and let out a deep breath. “Now Hange’s gonna keep you safe, listen to her and don’t cause any trouble.”

“I’ll try not to…” Eren smiles briefly and wraps his arms around himself.

“Good…I’ll see you soon, okay?” My brother nods his head and I look back up to Hange. “Thank you…for taking him, I’ll…I don’t know what I would…-“ Hange holds up a hand and smiles. It was still sad but gave me a strange comfort amidst our current chaos.

“No need to thank me, Mikasa…we’re family now, and family takes care of family…” Her words make my eyes sting and I blink rapidly to make the feeling go away…

No time for that…

“Right…time for you guys to go…” I give Eren a quick kiss on the cheek and head towards Furlan at the rear end of camp, knowing if I hung around much longer I wouldn’t be able to go along with it all.

“So, I’m thinking…” Furlan doesn’t look up from the map clutched in his knuckle tight grip. “Once everyone else gets out, we’ll clear out from the field and head into the woods. That way we won’t be some sitting ducks for the MP’s to find. They’ll want to check to see if there are any of us left behind and so we’ll get them unexpectantly when the -”

“What about everyone else…?” He finally looks up at me. “…how do we know they won’t just go after them?” I frown and look to the floor. I really didn’t want to question Furlan’s plans, he’d had this new responsibility thrust upon him and there were a hell of a lot of people to account for. “I’m not suggesting we all leave, that’s besides the initial point, I just want to make sure we’re not wasting our time here when they go after our camp mates who aren’t in a position to fight.”

“I get that you’re worried about your brother Mikasa, and I want to ensure their safety just as much as you. Honestly…” Furlan shrugs one shoulder and looks out towards the direction the others will be leaving soon. “...I think that the MP’s are very territory driven people, heading out that far North will just put them further and further away from their strong position. As long as we make sure they’re pulled into what we leave behind here, they’re gonna wanna catch _us_ …not them…”

I nod my head slowly and take a deep breath, letting it out whilst I adjust my shoulders in a more confident stance.

“Okay...—”

“Mikasa, look…” Furlan cuts me off and lets his expression fall into this look of vulnerability. “…I’m doing my best, but I’m not gonna lie…” He lets out a humourless chuckle. “…I’m way…way outta my depth here. He was way better at this shit than me and I don’t…I-I don’t even…--” I rest a gentle hand on Furlan’s shoulder and give him the warmest smile I can muster.

“Furlan…” My voice was low, but I tried to let every emotion I could reinforce my sincerity behind my next words. “…I couldn’t think of someone more able…or more trustworthy to take on this position. We’re counting on you, yes, but I trust you and, so…” I let out a wobbly sigh. “…s-so does he, so that means you’re gonna do just _fine_.” He looks up and I squeeze his shoulder before taking a step back.

“Thanks, Mikasa…we’ll um…” I watch him fold the map up and tuck it into his back pocket. “…we’re gonna help everyone here get out, then we’re gonna get him back.”

I look around at what’s left of the camp, tire tracks left behind from caravans and trucks, with discarded clothes and crates left behind in everyone’s haste…

What a mess…

 

(Levi POV)

“Reiner…?” My voice had gotten significantly weaker. His name coming out in a single breath, more of a desperate hold on reality rather than a pathetic attempt at hope for my friend’s life. “Shit…” I lift my head up and look at Reiner’s body, then lean my head back against the metal wall behind me. It was obvious he had died a little while back, maybe five…ten minutes ago…

Jesus Christ I could have been in this fucking room for hours for all my mind could tell…

“Look, Reiner, buddy…” I know he’s dead. “…I just…I-I’m just gonna need you to not...come back, just for a little while…” I pull lightly on my constraints and feel the painful ache in my muscles spark to life. “…just whilst I figure out how the fuck I’m gonna get out of here.”

I didn’t give myself time to think too much about the corpse. I could hear well enough the commotion that conspired after Nile left. He said he’d go after my camp and I believed more than anything that he’d do just that. I try hard not to freak out over the idea. I hope for a miracle that Furlan and the others managed to get back in time to warn the others.

“You still alive in here!?” I jump up when the door flings open, banging violently against the inside wall. I painfully let my head slump down to watch Nile take a step inside.

“Just…peachy…” The words hurt more to get out than I’d ever let on. Both the position of my constraints and the whack I took at the back of the head building to one hell of a dizzy spell. “How nice…for you to stop by…” My eyes flicker unconsciously towards Reiner again – something they’d been doing ever since the blood ran freely towards the centre of the room.

“Thought I’d check in…” He smiles and looks down at the paling corpse. “…doesn’t look good does he--?”

God, I wanted to rip that smug look off his face…

“—You know…” He takes a few more steps towards me and pulls out a knife from his belt. I recognise it almost immediately, it was my knife, the one taken from me the first time we were captured at this fucking factory. “I’ve sent some very reliable men to take care of your campmates. The little shits who got away couldn’t have gotten far.” He paces briefly before pointing the knife in my direction. “I’m thinking we’ll just get rid of the useless ones – I don’t need any dead weight back here – we’ll take any useful things you may have squirreled away…and maybe any nice women…” A knowing glint sparks in his eyes and it causes my straining muscles to tense.

“You’re a sick fuck you know that…?” I could feel blood trickling down the back of my neck, the wound from my head worse than I’d initially thought – although it would explain the spinning room. I focus hard on a point directly in front of me, reducing the nauseous feeling building in my stomach.

“A little birdy just informed me of some of the more…” Nile gestures his hand out nonchalantly. “… _personal_ anecdotes they picked up from watching your little group. And it turns out Rivaille got himself a little post-apocalyptic piece on the side.” I close my eyes and refuse to give the asshole the satisfaction of seeing my panic. “I’m thinking of bringing her back here…I mean, you’ll probably just be a bloody mess on the floor by then, but…” He shrugs one shoulder. “…I can still have some fun--” I open my eyes and look at him, he smirks, and I can’t help the laugh that falls from my lips.

The smirk disappears…

“—The hell’s so funny?” I smile, knowing it would drive him crazy. His anger was ridiculous really, I would never admit it, but he had the upper hand – you’d have to be crazy or in some serious denial to not realise that, but I relish in the brief moment of alarm that goes through his eyes…

What did I miss?

What has he done?

What’s he gonna do?

I’ll tell you now Nile…I can’t do shit like this, but the thought was funny…

“It’s just…” I hold back a grunt when he takes my hair in his hands, yanking my head up to look at him.

“What – is so – _fucking_ – _funny_!?”

“It’s just…” I try again, my own smirk returning. “…you think you’re just gonna…do whatever you want?” He pulls me toward him, my face inches from his own and I see the anger boiling behind the ugly surface – he wanted to hit me…he was _gonna_ hit me…

“Yeah, I fucking _do_ think I can do whatever – _the fuck_ – I want…” His voice lowers, a questioning look in his eye that urges me to go on.

“She’s gonna…” My voice is scratchy and the strain from Nile’s grip sends a sharp pain through my shoulder blades. “…She’s gonna kick your ass, before you can touch her…” My words take a moment to sink in…

Then he punches me…

Any semi-consciousness I had remaining is left spinning and I spit the sudden pool of blood in my mouth out onto the floor.

“I’ll let her know you were thinking of her so proudly in your last moments…” Nile’s voice is muffled to my ears and I see a quick movement in my peripheral. I squint to the side and see my knife sticking out of the wall, inches from my forearm – stuck between two of the rusting metal plates.

Nile finally walks out of the room, not sparing me another glance and I thank God for the small miracle. If I just found a way to get my hands free, the knife could be my way out. I didn’t know whether he left it there to mock me…did he want me to have this slim chance of survival…?

Or was he just getting cocky…again…?

I pull my body up ever so slightly and get my bearings. I look up at my hands, twisted above my head, then back to the knife…easy…

Somehow…

“I’ve just got to –” I stop muttering to myself when a quiet moan makes my pulse jump up. I spin my head around, my skull pounding and catch Reiner lift his lifeless face. “Fuck…just… _Reiner_ , _buddy_ …I just need five more minutes to think…”

 

 

(Mikasa POV)

“Do we know what direction they’re gonna come from?” I whisper to Furlan beside me, us and about five others are cramped between the undergrowth of the outer woods, everyone else already on the road. We’d decided that it was important for Erwin to stay with the group, give them someone to take them to safety no matter what. Mike went as Erwin’s right-hand man, and after a long battle with Bertholdt, Jean managed to convince him to go as well – especially since there was a chance Reiner wouldn’t be coming back. I look out to see the trash and tire marks left behind from the rest of the campers and I can hear my own heart beat to the rhythm of my anxiety.

“It’ll be likely from the West…” Furlan whispers back, his voice just stable enough to rejuvenate my own confidence in this dumb ass plan. “…hopefully they’ll notice the decoy and not give much mind to the rest of the camp.” I raise an eyebrow and let out a low breath.

“I suppose…here’s hoping our enemy is as dumb as shit…”

“Hey…” Furlan sounds vaguely annoyed. “…it was the best plan we could carry out in the time we had – lucky for us Hange had cultivated enough of it together since we arrived here.” I frown.

“Yeah, what exactly do you think she was planning on doing with it all?” Furlan shrugs.

“Heck if I know, could have been anything with Hange.” I nod slowly and smile. It was true. Honestly, I didn’t really expect anything less from that crazy woman.

“Still…” I adjust my body into a more comfortable crouch. “…over twenty pounds of dynamite…slightly disconcerting.” Furlan doesn’t look in my direction but gives an acknowledging head tilt.

“Maybe…in the wrong hands…” Well, that is one way of looking at it.

“Furlan!” We both spin our heads around and watch Connie half-heartedly stumble through the undergrowth. “They’re here…parked up the old barn off the main road and they’ve made their way here on foot. Furlan nods his head and we all turn our attention back to the lone caravan in the centre of the field. The windows have been covered up and reinforcements were teetered around the edge – anything to give the impression there were a bunch of hopeless sods hurled up inside.

“Someone needs to go now then, before they get to the opening…--” I cut Furlan off.

“I’ll go…!” He’s already shaking his head. “Why not…!?” Furlan turns to look at me, but I go on regardless. “…I’m probably faster, I know what I’m doing-”

“ _Because_ , Mikasa…it’s gonna be fucking dangerous going out there – whoever does it, there’s a good chance they’re not coming out of it unscathed” He pauses for a moment and seems to regain some steam, his eyes glassy. “…and when Levi comes back ---” I make to interrupt him, but he won’t let me. “—I for one sure as hell don’t want to have to look him in the eye and tell him that you died in some _bullshit_ explosion meant for the MP’s…” There’s a still silence between us when he finishes. “…I’ll do it.”

It wasn’t a suggestion, it was an order: stay here whilst I do it, don’t move…

Don’t do anything stupid…

“Okay…” I nod and watch him take the rucksack, then he begins to sprint across the quiet space in front of us.

The plan was simple – which meant it was easier to put together, easier to unfold, but also way more likely to go horribly wrong. We’d set up the caravan left behind to appear as a lonesome base. They would presume we’d stick behind to take them out, and true to that we have – just not inside a literal tin can. We decked the glorified trailer out with Hange’s dynamite, along with some scattered around the vicinity, and when enough MPs approached our trojan horse…

Boom…

Which is why Furlan needed to be over there, so he could set it off. There were no wireless cords or big red buttons out here – just your good old-fashioned matches.

Once the MP’s were either burning from the explosion or distracted by the pretty bonfire, the rest of us were here to take them out. One by one…

Then we find the others up North by the old abandoned supermarket that had been flagged some weeks ago as a go to base for the stranded. It was closed off and relatively quiet from walkers. If those of us here didn’t make it back before sun down tomorrow, the rest of the group was to carry on, further up North…

No exceptions…

“Do you think it’s gonna work?” I look up to see Sasha perched beside me, her face screwed up in an anxious expression. Her and Connie insistent they stay behind to help, so they could be here when we went to find Levi.

“It has to work…” I watch Furlan make his way behind the back of the caravan and organise the fuse Hange had kindly put together before everyone left. Shouts echoed from the far end of the field and dark clothed figures start sprinting towards our abandoned camp. They were here.

The rest of us wait patiently as the MP’s scatter around over the left behind debris from frantic packing and covering tracks. Loose tents flutter in the wind and empty canned goods litter paling grass. I duck my head down a bit, watching one of the more confident men at the front, his gun pointed to every possible target that draws his attention.

“How long do you think he’ll wa…--” I hold up my hand to silence Sasha. I was holding my breath as the ten… _fifteen_ men draw closer and closer to our end of the field. Furlan peers around the side of the caravan and hunkers down lower, clutching the matches in his hand. The fuse was set up around the back of the vehicle so that whoever lit it would be able to do so without being seen and then the hill would enable them a quick get away towards the lake – hopefully to avoid the greatest extent of the explosion.

“Come on…” My voice is barely a whisper as my eyes follow our new apocalyptic enemy. As if the undead creatures wandering the Earth weren’t enough before… I hear the muffled shouts as the man at the front – presumably the leader – calls for the others to follow him. They walk slowly towards where Furlan’s hidden.

“We know you’re in there…!” The leader points his gun at the tattered front door. “…come out, tell us where your camp went, and we’ll talk like men…” I hear Connie scoff from beside me and I smirk.

“What the fuck does that even mean?” His question raises an interesting point and I reply without taking my eyes off the display in front of us.

“Talking like men is code for ‘riddle you with bullets when you don’t tell us what we want’…” I shrug. “…or alternatively, ‘after you _do_ tell us what we want, we riddle you with bullets anyway’.” Sasha laughs humourlessly from my other side.

“Ain’t that the truth, these guys are no joke…” The leader takes a few steps closer, prompting the rest of his team to follow suit. Each one was now within the vicinity of the blast and I watch as Furlan removes a match. It was going to be dangerous. Being that close to the blast didn’t give Furlan much of an opportunity to get away. We were safe enough behind the line of trees, still a few hundred yards away from where we could get hit.

“Do it now…come on Furlan…” Our designated leader fiddles with the fuse out of sight and suddenly his silhouette sprints towards the hill. Various shouts come from the onlooking MP’s. None of them noticing what’s being done until its too late. The fuse is short, and it takes a matter of seconds before the first stick of dynamite sets off a loud and impossibly unavoidable blast.

The last thing I see before the surroundings fill with heavy black smoke is Furlan’s body being thrown down the steep slope towards the lake. All I can do is pray he survived the initial blast before the rest of us quickly lay down flat, avoiding any extended waves from the heat and debris thrown up by the explosion. I can hear the screams of the men we wanted to kill – it didn’t feel good, but it was better than the alternative.

I lay my forehead against the damp, muddy ground – laying as flat as I can. The ringing in my ears is stinging the back of my skull but the subtle tug from Sasha and Connie by my side brings me a dull comfort through it all. The world spins and I focus on my breathing.

The explosion was a little bigger than we’d anticipated…

I still can’t hear anything – the ringing only getting seemingly more persistent. I finally manage to raise my head to peer over the log I was hidden behind, and the field looks like a war zone. The smoke begins to clear, and bodies are either lying in pieces on the ground or hobbling away – some – in our direction…

 _“Mikasa…!”_ I focus on my breathing, in – out… “Mikasa…!” A hand grabs my shoulder and I spin around to see Sasha looking down at me, a gun in her hand and her eyes wide. “We need to take care of the ones who didn’t get hit…”

Oh yeah…

The ringing still doesn’t stop…

 

 

(Levi POV)

“Fuuuuuuck…!” I pull on the chain once more, but my muscles scream for me to stop. I let out a heavy breath and allow my body to relax, sliding my eyes over to Reiner. His throat lets out a painful gurgling groan. “Yeah…” I sigh, nodding to myself. “…I couldn’t have put it better myself.” I lean my head back against the metal panel and give myself thirty seconds to rest before I try again.

1…2…3…

I try hard not to let my mind run through what could be happening back at camp. About what could have already happened without me ever really knowing…

7…8…9…

 _‘Besides, I’ll be back before you know it…’_ The dark recesses of my mind take me back to mine and Mikasa’s last conversation…

_‘And if you’re not?’_

…

“Well that’s just ridiculous…” My voice sounds hollow in the small empty room.

13…14…15…

It’s kind of funny how the universe works. I’d always believed I’d go out bloody…never quite like this though. I open my eyes a little and peer at the chains around my wrists…

Bit kinkier than I’d pictured it…

19…20…21…

 _‘I’ll see you later, yeah…promise?’_ It hurt more than it should, the idea of dying never seemed particularly harrowing before.

It was a rich irony, that the end of the world would come along and give me a fucking reason to live…

_‘Promise…’_

For some reason the promise made it worse…

25…26…27…

I let out another sigh and open my eyes…

28…29…30…

“Okay, Reiner…” I look over at his glazed ridden eyes. “…from the top…” I pull my wrists together and begin to pull against the constraints once more. There’s a subtle creaking sound that emanates from beneath the panelling, small, but enough to keep me going. For all I know, I’m just wasting my time, but it was either that or wait patiently for the slow and painful release of death…

I sigh again…

The pain in my arms wasn’t about to subside anytime soon and the room still spins from the wound at the back of my head. I still felt nauseous and I was starting to think I might have lost more blood than I’d initially thought.

“You know…” I stop pulling. “…for a brief moment there, just…” I adjust my footing, the binding making my stance painful. “…just for one – brief - almost insignificant – in the grand scheme of things – _moment_ …I thought maybe I was gonna get everything I ever wanted…” I look to Reiner and silently thank the Lord when he hasn’t managed to move from the same spot. “It was stupid really, hoping that, maybe, I was gonna be allowed something, _somebody,_ to make me feel a little less like the piece of shit the world turned me into--” I attempt to yank on the chain in one quick tug rather than the gradual strain I’d previously attempted.

“—Shit!” I hit the wall and clench my teeth when the pain in my head turns to a sharp stabbing through my temple. Well that technique didn’t work…

 I look back to my dead friend and shake my head…

“Okay, so…” I try to blow my bangs out of my face, not wanting to shake my head too much. “…that’s not gonna work.” I angle my head to the side and look at the soft glint of the knife still stuck in the wall – taunting me. “You ever just feel like the cosmos is putting you through one massive ass test, just to see how far you’ll go before you break?” I look over to the walker. “Before you become this shell of a man?” Funnily enough, the corpse says nothing. “Of course you don’t know, you’re just a glorified result of man’s corrupt consumerist approach to modern day capitalism--” I let out a frustrated groan. I know talking to Reiner wasn’t helping my escape, but it was keeping some small semblance in my brain sane and free from panic.

“--Did you know that George Romero’s 1978 classic ‘Dawn of the Dead’ was a satirical attack to produce a melodramatic metaphor on America’s nature and value for consumerism…?” I address the dead guy in the room. “It’s interesting if you think about it, people are so obsessed with this insatiable appetite that they would go as far as to consume each other – I guess, from a literal stand point – it’s not really practical, but figuratively speaking, it’s in our nature as humans to take and take, until there is nothing left…” I tilt my head to the side for a moment. “…Hange explained that to me once…” My chest tightens at the memory. “Upon obtaining what you want, as a walking corpse, you’re never satisfied and so you move on to pursue more flesh, just as in life we are constantly striving to achieve permanent happiness, however impossible—” I use my forearm to wipe off the sweat that begins to drip down my neck. “—I suppose we’re all guilty of that to some extent…” I rattle the chains half-heartedly and send an exhausted look at my friend, slash…temporary therapist.

“--Sorry you have to listen to my imminent death ramblings. I’m not usually so talkative but the moment just seems to call for it…” I give Reiner a nonchalant shrug which pulls on my aching shoulder blades. “…do you charge by the hour or… I mean, I don’t want you to feel like you can’t _contribute_ to the conversation, ask some questions…pick my brain--” The walker lets out a low groan and I laugh.

“—No yeah, I know…that wasn’t funny…” I look back to my sore bloody wrists. “…Oluo always said I had a shitty sense of humour…” I smile to myself, allowing myself that brief moment.

 _‘UHsdgfhsuUH…’_ The sound makes me snap my head up and I have to squint to avoid my head from exploding in pain.

“Reiner?” My eyes finally focus, and I see Reiner’s stiff body begin to move away from the wall, his milky eyes moving across the room to land on me. “Oh, great…” My heartrate picks up and it was clear to see that it was now or never. “…you’re awake--” I frantically turn my attention back to the constraints, racking my brain over any way I haven’t tried yet to set myself free. All the while I can hear the moving corpse make more progress in its mobility.

“—So, what?” I rake my eyes over the wall in front of me, the smooth surface not allowing me any ridges or grip to lever myself upwards. “Does it take a while for the hunger to kick in, or…” I peer over to Reiner moving slowly across the room towards me. “Were you just an inherently lazy human being, Reiner?” The walker stumbles and I have to swing my feet upwards, pulling on the chains to kick the body away – buying me, maybe…thirty seconds.

I turn back to the wall again and silently apologise to my muscles before pulling myself up. I worry for a second I might pass out from the strain in my body, but I focus on the chains. I lift my body from the ground and angle myself so that my boots are flat against the wall. From this position I can use my full body’s strength to pull down on the rusty joints.

“Come ooooon…fuck, _fuck_ , _fuck_ …” I keep pulling, my boots slipping ever so slightly, struggling for any grip on the metal surface. A loud creak goes through the panel joint and I relish in the sound. I spare a quick glance and notice Reiner a lot closer than I’d anticipated…

I pull harder and feel my head pulse with the strain it puts on my body…

“Come – on – you – piece – of…--” The chains groan under my body weight and I have to lean to my left to avoid Reiner swiping across my shoulder. “Shit, shit, shit…” Suddenly the metal panel pops and the chains bust out of the wall joint, sending my body falling to the ground. I frantically grab the knife out of the wall on my way down and make sure to roll my body away from Reiner as he lunges once again.

I hit the ground with a dull thud, sending pain through my entire body. I don’t have time to react to my screaming muscles as the walker falls, mouth snapping open and closed violently. Just as Reiner’s weight falls on my torso, I angle my knife up and send the blade through the top of his skull. The sound of jaws clacking stops abruptly and redy brown liquid begins to ooze down my wrist from the wound. I lift my head up to make sure it was dead.

He was dead…

He wasn’t moving, it’s body only twitching slightly on top of mine as the last few muscles in the corpse begin to finish seizing up. I let my head drop down to the floor and I take a deep breath, using my aching arms to push the corpse off me. I wipe the blade of my knife onto my jeans and angle my head to the side so that I could peer at my dead friend – now that he was dead for real.

“Sorry Reiner…” I look back to the ceiling and run bloody fingers through my hair. “…it was a little touch and go for a minute there.”

 

(Mikasa POV)

The four of us left in the woods rush out whilst we still had a reasonable amount of cover. The smoke lingers in the air like a thick fog which burns my eyes, the ringing ceases more and more by the second and sounds begin to get louder around me. Shouts and curses fly through the dense atmosphere and I watch as Sasha and Connie sneak up behind an unsuspecting MP. He’s holding his arm, the skin burnt down to the bone.

He was in obvious pain and his screams resonate right through you – killing him begins to feel more like a courtesy. I wrap the thin bandana we each grabbed before the plan, covering the lower half of my face. Silhouettes are made clearer as smoke rises and I quickly duck out of the way from an attack from my left.

I spin around to see the man who I had presumed was the leader. He had been at the front of the group, closest to the explosion – he should be dead.

“You bitch!!” One of his hands holds a heavy duty knife, his gun presumably lost in the chaos. “You did this to me!!” I focus on my breathing and take a step back, my eyes running over the sizzling flesh that was once his face. I don’t say anything, my stomach threatening to rebel at the sight of the peeling man, but I hold it in. I take another step back and pull out my own knife.

“You did this to yourselves!!” I don’t spare another second and take advantage of the guys fucked up sight. I kick his trembling legs from under him and send his body to the ground. The impact forces an immediate scream from his throat and I have to remind myself who he is…what he is… I take in what’s left of his disfigured expression and decide that…

I would be doing him a favour…

I plunge the knife into his skull and yank it out, the guys body going limp and his glassy eyes shining over. I force myself to take a minute and calm my frantic heartbeat, my hands shaking more than normal. Last time I killed someone, I mean…some one before they turned, was my father…

It was for their own good…

It was the right thing…

They were going to hurt us first…

“Mikasa!!” I spin on my feet and catch Furlan stumble up to the top of the hill. I let out a breath in relief and blink rapidly as my eyes begin to burn more and more from the snowing ash. The heat from the fire is so hot and I can feel sweat trickle down the back of my neck. “There’s two more at your three o’clock – don’t let them get away! I nod my head slowly and take in the rest of the mess around us.

My ears have finally stopped ringing, but the sounds still merged together like dull vibrations underwater. I catch sight of the two figures hobbling towards the far end of the field and I start at a sprint. I make my way passed Annie as she checks out a few more corpses. She spares me a glance, her own bandana wrapped around her face and she nods in the direction I’m headed. I gesture for her to continue and turn back to my task.

As soon as I reach the two remaining survivors I take one out with a kick to the back of the knees. I jump back as his friend goes for my hair, his hand burnt up pretty bad. I don’t let myself get sucked into another spiral. It’s the world we live in now – dog eat dog – every man for himself…except…

I wasn’t doing this for myself…

I tackle the second guy to the ground and thrust my knife into his burnt-up hand. It slides through and sticks into the ground beneath. I pull out my second knife – my good knife…

Levi’s knife…

 -and I hold it against his throat, my voice coming out low and impatient.

“What did you do to my friends?!” The guys eyes are dark under mine and I push the knife a little closer, making him tense underneath me.

“F-fuck should I know lady? W-we came here to find out for ourselves – we don’t have your fr-“

“No! Nonono, you know what I’m talking about, you still have two of our people, where are they – what have you done!?” I squeeze the hilt of the knife still sticking out of his hand and angle it slightly, causing the man to scream in pain. The noise just goes through me this time, a means to an end – then he smiles. What the hell does he have to smile about?

“Y-you mean…” He coughs, and I feel the push of his jugular again my blade. “…y-you mean Rivaille and the betrayer?” I twist the knife again and he winces, forcing his scream down this time. I feel my grip on both weapons becoming shaky and the smoke in my eyes causes tears to drip down my cheek.

Yeah…the smoke…

“Where _are_ they!? What have you DONE!?” By bandana falls down and I don’t even recognise my own voice. The thick air made my throat scratchy and you could hear it when I shout – so much emotion in one word towards the end. The guy smiles and shakes his head.

“Y-your pathetic leader is d-dead, walker food…that asshole Braun is the one you can thank for that –“ I cut him off by twisting the knife, the dynamic of our relationship becoming somewhat of a pattern.

“YOU’RE LYING!!” I scream it and shift my knife closer to his jugular. “NO, you’re LYING!!” The man’s face screws up in pain and I sense movement from the corner of my eye.

“Mikasa!!” I look up to see the other man I’d kicked down point a gun at my head, but before he has a chance to take a shot a separate one goes through air – going through one temple and out the other. The guy’s body crumples to the floor and I see Annie, breathing heavy, stood behind him. “Are you—" She takes a step forward and I feel a sticky grip on my hand, the man beneath me ceasing the opportunity to flip me off him.

He screams as my knife is forced through his hand at a new angle, but he powers through, somehow managing to scramble on top of me. I look up into his bulging eyes, surrounded by crispy flesh and dried blood.

“I wasn’t lying…” His voice is quiet and earie between us. I frantically grab my knife that had fallen into the grass during the struggle and plunge it into his chest. Blood trickles down onto me and his throat gurgles from the puncture I caused inside. I flip him over and pull the knife out, moving it to stab through his skull. As soon as I do the gurgling stops and he goes still.

I’m breathing fast and feel like I’m going to be sick…

“Mikasa!” I look up to see Furlan crouched in front of me. Everyone else has finished checking the rest of the bodies and they linger some distance away to give me space. “Mikasa…” His voice goes gentle and slowly removes my knife from its grip. “It’s okay…it’s okay…” I feel myself shake my head again and again, the tears still tracking down my face, causing soot ridden marks to run down my cheeks.

“No…no no no…” I look down at my hands and see other people’s blood stain my fingers. “…it’s not…” I hear the sobs beginning in the back of my throat. “…none of this is okay, he’s g-gone Furlan. H-he’s gone and he’s not coming back…!” I look up into Furlan’s wide blue eyes and let him take my hands. “Levi’s dead and he’s not coming back…”

 

(Levi POV)

“Shitty, _fuck_ …!” I whisper it into the silent room as I attempt to sit up from the cold blood-soaked floor. I pull me legs up and even thinking about trying to stand just doesn’t seem like a good time. I lift up my hands, the chains still attached to my wrists since I only pulled the things off from the wall. It was going to be an awkward escape, that’s for sure. I glance down to Reiner’s body and let myself feel something, just for a moment, for my dead friend. He was a good guy…

God, telling Bertholdt’s gonna suck…

I settle my hands onto the ground and push my body up off the floor, the metal chains clanging against the surface. I let out an involuntary pained groan and immediately lean the wall. The room spins dangerously, and I start to suspect I might have a concussion. I lean my forehead against the panelling and close my eyes – just for a minute. My body screams at me to lay down, now that I finally can, nothing seems more appealing.

To just lay down and sleep – but with a concussion like this…

I might not wake up…

I open my eyes and take a deep breath, bending down to pick up my knife and cut off the binding around my feet. I just had to get going and my body will start giving me enough adrenaline to get through this. I tuck my knife into my belt and head towards the door. I put an ear up against the surface and listen out for what could be happening outside. I had no idea where about in the building I might be, and I have no idea how I was gonna get out without anybody noticing. I glance down at my blood soaked clothes and imagine I might stick out just a little in a crowd – in fact – I’d probably blend in better with the undead community outside.

Okay so…think Levi, think…I need a distraction. As soon as someone finds out I’m missing I’ll be priority uno. I need something bigger than me, something that’ll be seen as a _way_ bigger problem than an escaped prisoner.

I rest my hand on the door handle and let out a quiet sigh of relief when it opens. Clearly Nile didn’t think I’d be using the door anytime soon. I open it gradually, making sure that no one was waiting by in the general vicinity. The surroundings seemed relatively safe, so I open the door wider and gingerly take a step out, ignoring the pain in my muscles and throbbing in my skull. I spare one last glance at Reiner before leaving the room and close the door behind me. If I left it open someone would suspect my escape sooner rather than later. I had no doubt that Nile would check up on me soon in hopes of a rather bloody discovery.

But I live to disappoint…

I walk slowly down the dimly lit corridor and start to hear voices, bustling sounds of people working. I peer my head around the corner and notice an exit that leads to an outside area. It smelt weird, not bad weird, just…different. It was a subtle flowery sent…like a washing detergent…

I must be in the east end of the building where I told the others to escape through earlier. The domestic area for cooking and cleaning. Why the hell would Nile leave me in this part of his base? You don’t do your dirty work where you clean, that makes, like…no sense… I shake my head and decide to count my blessings. I peer around the corner of the open door, careful not to let my chains bash against the metal surface. There’s a couple of women talking amongst themselves, immersed in the gossip and act of folding laundry. Even during the end of the world, gender roles are hard to crack. I watch for a moment and peer over the clothes hung on the make-shift washing line.

“Trish…!” My eyes travel to the source of the deep voice and both women do the same. There’s a heavy built guy walking in their direction, clearly angry about something and gestures for one of the women to follow him. I watch as the other woman is left behind, and she turns back around, attention back on the half-folded blankets. My eyes travel down to the gun on her hip and I weigh up my options:

Attempt to escape the MP ridden hell hole with just my knife…

Or interrupt the nice lady doing her laundry…

…

…

No, yeah, I need that gun…

I step out into the open and use the larger sheets as cover whilst I make my way over to the unsuspecting woman. It felt wrong and weirdly predatorial – just wrong place wrong time – sorry…I get out my knife and grab her arms, my muscles screaming at me as I push her against the wall. I keep my voice low and watch her eyes widen as she takes in my face – clearly aware of who I was.

“Look lady, I don’t wanna hurt you, just give me your gun—” She struggles under my grip and I have to adjust my footing when she tries to kick me. She was a fighter and I respected that. I raise my knife up and settle it at the base of her throat.

 “H-how did you get out…?” I was momentarily frozen by the question, surprised she knew anything about what Nile was doing. I push the knife closer.

“That hardly seems like the pressing matter right now…” I look down at her gun, both my hands busy with holding her against the wall and gripping my knife – also chained at awkward angles. “Would you mind unclipping that for me?” I ask nicely and nod down to the weapon at her belt.

“Fuck you!” Her voice wobbles and I roll my eyes.

“ _Really_ …!? You’re gonna-?” I let out a sigh and settle the throbbing in my skull. “I really… _really_ don’t wanna hurt you—”

“Ni—!” She goes to shout, and I quickly use the new angle of her head to knock it back against the wall. Her eyes roll to the back of her head instantly and she slumps. I let her slide to the ground, knowing she would be out just long enough for me to get away, I didn’t exactly want her telling anyone of my escape any time soon. I bend down and unclip her gun from the belt, tucking it into my waistband, quickly checking over her injury and deeming her a quick recovery once she wakes up. I really _didn’t_ wanna hurt her…

But some people just can’t co-operate…

I grab one of the heavy jackets and rest it gingerly on my shoulders, knowing I wouldn’t be able to get it on properly with the chains still around my wrists. I slink back into the shadows behind the door. It was an awkward ordeal, but I lift the hood up and hope it’ll be enough to help me blend in. Everyone basically looks the same around here, with their military style clothes and bland colours. I look down and check the front of my shirt, splatters of blood showing through the opening of the jacket…eh – what’s a little blood…

It really brings the outfit together…

I turn back around and make my way down the corridor, passed the open door and listen out for anymore MP dwellers that could sneak up on me. I freeze in my tracks when a couple of guys come around the corner, talking amongst themselves, the younger one spouting some shit about his new idea for nail bats. I don’t really have much of a choice and I pull the hood down over my eyes, hunkering lower in my jacket, making myself as small and insignificant as I can – not something I’m particularly used to doing.

“--the asshole actually thought he stood a chance with the pathetic accuse of a weapon…” They walk on passed me, suspecting nothing, completely oblivious to the chained, blood-soaked escaped prisoner beside them…

What kind of rooky, piss-poor of an excuse for an operation is Nile running here?

I keep on walking, down and passed more tunnels, the factory giving an oddly twisted layout to your usual surroundings. My body still ached and every time I turned a new corner the floor twisted up at an odd angle – I suspect it was the concussion – but I keep close to the wall and stay forward. I have no idea where I am or how far away an exit might be, but I keep going. I needed to rest – for the love of God – I needed to rest…but I can’t…

There’s a sudden commotion somewhere in the building, whether this was to do with me or not, I have no idea. It’s quite possible Nile had gone back to check on my bloody body and found…well, one bloody body – just not mine. Wish I could have seen his face… I keep walking until I see a window. Looking out, I see a vast field meaning I must be around the back of the base, near to where we tried to sneak up when we first got here. If I could get outside I can make my way towards the lake and get out through there. I turn around, keeping one hand resting on the wall as I go and make my way towards the closest door I can find.

Part of me found it quite strange that I hadn’t come across more people already. You’d think with so many MP’s and such a large base there would be men everywhere. I know that Nile’s probably sent some to our camp, but I push that thought down pretty quickly, knowing it’s not gonna help for me to think about it right now. I finally get to a door and kick it open, no longer able to be as quiet as I’d initially tried – everything hurt, and I needed to get out. I have to strain my eyes to the sudden change in light, although it wasn’t exactly bright outside with the day coming to an end. I had no idea how long I was actually inside that building but I suspected it must be getting on for the late hours of the afternoon, the sun making its way down towards the horizon.

I relish for a moment in fresh air, it was like fucking heroin to my lungs. After a moment I begin to hobble around the back of the building, various canopies and boxes lining the edge. It’s quiet back here but I can already hear the voices of men and women from not far away. It sounded as if they were moving something heavy, noises of exhaustion and rapid orders were being given. Some people walk around me, but still no one questions it as I blend into the rest of the masses. I try to straighten my shoulders to appear more confident, the new crowd suggesting I’d start to stick out if I appeared wounded or like I was about to pass out…

Which I wouldn’t really put past me at this point…

“Don’t drop that!” I look over to see Nile at the front of the chaos. He was yelling at men whilst they moved barrels between a large tanker and around the other side of the wall. I lean nonchalantly against a table at the back of the crowd, watching the organised plan that appeared to be unfolding in front of me.

What’s in the barrels…?

I think back to our journey across the back pass, when Furlan and I had decided on a swift turn around – fat lot of good that had done – and I remember seeing the barrels scattered across the fields. They had been empty then but clearly left behind for a purpose in the near future. I inch closer to the scene in front of me, gradually around the growing crowd, some working, some just getting in the way. I lift my chin up and smell the air… it was sweet, a scent nearly anyone could recognise…

Gasoline…

He’d been collecting gasoline, which made sense. With this amount of men and – no doubt – his plans for the future, vehicles and artillery will definitely be at the top of his list. My eyes drift back over to the main tanker and a plan starts to build in the back of my mind.

I wanted a distraction –

And I’m thinking that these barrels could give me one hell of a distraction…

 

(Mikasa POV)

“Mikasa, you don’t know that, these guys…!” Furlan gestures to the bloody bodies beside me. “…these guys will talk all kinds of shit to get in your head. Of course they’re gonna tell you that, of course they’re gonna want you to break…!” His voice lowers, and I feel gentle fingers lift my chin. “Mikasa, we need you to focus, I need you to take a breath.” I look up at him and feel the last tears fall from my cheeks. I reach up and wipe my face, forcing Furlan to lean back, giving me my space. I nod my head and take a shaky breath.

“N-no, you’re right…” I take another. “…you’re right.” My voice was quiet between us and I feel a small swell of shame after having fallen for their lie so quickly. I was just so scared – part of me still believing it could be true.

“Of course I’m right…” Furlan smiles and stands up, offering a hand out to me. “…now let’s go check out the factory before word could get back about what happened here. Levi could be waiting for us and we can’t keep him waiting.” I nod again and take his hand. I let out my final shaky breath and settle my breathing, looking over our small group. I turn my head when two sets of arms circle me from behind. It didn’t take long to realise who it was, and I allow myself a small smile when Sasha squeezes tighter.

“Let’s go get him, yeah?” Her voice is strong, and I let it settle the sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach.

“Yeah…” They release me from the hug and I bend down to wipe my bloody knife on the grass. Standing back up, I straighten my stance and take a moment to settle my racing heart. “Let’s go…”

 

(Levi POV)

I crouch around the other side of the tanker and watch as various barrels are rolled away from the other side. One barrel probably holds about twenty five gallons of gasoline, one barrel would probably cause enough of a distraction that I would become the least of Nile’s problems. Each one is being rolled or carried in various directions and so I wait patiently for one to come over here. I’m stood just out of sight that no one should notice a minor altercation behind the heavy truck tanker.

One barrel…

Two barrels…

…

Five barrels…

Jesus this is a lot of gasoline…I jolt into action when I notice a figure enter my previously empty peripheral. I edge closer to the wall and wait for the MP to get within reaching distance. As soon as the guy’s back is turned I kick his shins out from under him then cut off his shout with my hand, using the chain to wrap around his neck. I place more and more pressure until the struggling stops and his eyelids flutter shut.

“Thaaat’s a good boy…” I lower the guy onto the floor and slowly roll the barrel in the same direction. I check to make sure my hood remains up and I push it towards the front of the factory entrance. No one pays me mind as I follow a few of the other workers. It was going quite well, and my plan was simple. Set off the barrel at the front of the factory, cause a scene and slink away into the distance as everyone flailed about the fire. It was gonna be so…so simple…

“Yo, mate…that needs to come over here!” Shit, I peer up to see an MP walking towards me, obviously a higher head, going by his willingness to order the other men around -which also means he’s more likely to recognise me. Shit, shit, shit… “Did you hear me?! That needs—” He grabs hold of my arms and – inherent reflexes are a funny thing…

I twist out of his grasp and throw my elbow back, knocking the guy in the face. My hood falls down in the process and I immediately see the recognition in his eyes. He holds his bloody nose and my little display has already started to cause attention – it really didn’t look good.

“—Fuck, it’s you!!” I knew I didn’t stand much of a change. Denial wasn’t gonna work – ‘I have no idea what you’re talking about’ didn’t seem like it was gonna cut it. I raise my hands.

“Guess you got me… –“ My voice comes out flat and I watch fury swarm over the guys face, more and more men gathering around us.

“How the fuc- NILE!” I watch the guy go to grab his gun and I pull mine out, putting a bullet between his eyes before he can do anything. I guess if I can at least take out a few of his guys before I go…

Every cloud, right?

I start at a sprint towards the other direction but immediately come to a wall of MP’s. I skid on the ground and use one of the barrels to manoeuvre my body around and take off in the other direction. I take out a few more as I go by, all head shots, watching as my chances of escape diminish into just about nothingness. I know I’m heading back in the direction of the tanker and I spot Nile appear from around the corner - the commotion having caught his attention. I skid to a holt as his eyes grow wide at the sight of me.

“How the…” His eyes travel down to the chains around my wrists. “…How the _hell_ did you get out?!” He seemed almost in shock.

“Well, you know me…” I stand up straight, holding my hands up to emphasise the chain constraints still hanging between me – gun still in hand. “…I’m just your good old-fashioned Houdini.” I smile at him and watch the shock turn into anger, then into something else. He smiles, looking around us, all of his men ready for me to make a run for it.

“Funny that…but I don’t really see how you’re gonna get out of this one.” His smile grows, and I let out a tired breath.

It was true, I sure as hell didn’t either… I was surrounded and the only way out, without being killed by the people I considered lesser than the dirt at the bottom of my shoe, was a bullet in my head. I look down at my gun and clench it tighter…

I knew it was a gamble, the moment I walked out of that room, the chances of me getting out of here alive were slim to none –

I guess this is the none…

“So how to you wanna go out Levi…? Hmmm?” Nile takes a step forward and I hear a few of his men chuckle around us. “What’s this? The famous Rivaille finally speechless, no smart-ass remarks – no final words. COME OOOON!” Nile yells loudly, making a display as he gestures his arms open wide. “Where’s the fight, WHERE’S THAT GOOD OLD S LEGION SPIRIT!?” He takes another step.

I don’t say anything, my mind racing for something – anything…

My silence was telling them my resignation – an acceptance to my fate?

I look at the world around us and let out a quiet scoff – this wasn’t my fate – this was some twisted, bullshit test from the cosmos…

It was bigger than us…

The state of the world might be providence…

But it wasn’t _my_ fate…

“So, Levi…how do you wanna go out?” Nile repeats the question and raises his gun. “Do you wanna go out _quick_ …!?” He shakes his head, clearly not liking that idea. I rake my eyes over the various outer buildings and crates around us, everyone crowded in this area.

I guess, if I had to die - then at least I’d be taking him to hell with me…

Every cloud, right…?

“I’m thinking…” Nile perks up when I finally speak. I grip my gun in my hand and let out a sigh, taking one more moment to picture everyone’s face, everyone’s smile… her smile…I look up and give Nile one of my own. “I’m thinking I wanna go out with a bang…”

Then I point my gun at the gasoline tanker, and fire…

 

(Mikasa POV)

“It‘s just up here…” We pull up to the edge of a long dirt road and stop the truck. “Just down there.” Furlan nods his head towards the direction of the far trees and we get out. I land on the dry dirt and take a few steps towards the heavy metal gates.

“We went around the back when we came last time, the front is way more ominous than what we saw before.” Connie stands beside me and I look up, the sky dull and cloudy above us.

“Do you think we should go through the woods, God knows how many are still out there. Coming from the front is just trouble…” Sasha sounds scared and I would normally try say something to calm her down, but my mind is distracted, something is wrong...

“It’s our best option, we couldn’t exactly have—” I tune the rest of them out and take a few more steps forward.

“Can you guys smell that?” I turn around and look at the rest of them. Furlan lifts his chin and frowns.

“Burning?” I nod my head and he looks at me. “Gas…” My stomach flips and I look up at the sky again. What I initially thought were rain clouds had spread unnaturally through the wind, carrying the smell of gasoline with it.

“Something’s happened…” I take off at a sprint and hear the others shout my name from behind. It doesn’t take long for them to give chase and I watch the trees go by in a blur. Various vehicles sit by the side of the dirt road, some looking in good condition and others were turned over, scavenged for parts. My breaths are slightly laboured, my body still recovering from the smoke I inhaled and the altercation back at camp. I veer around the corner and the smell gets stronger. Stumbling figures come into view and I take my knife out, ready for any of the flaming walkers that might get in my way. They must have been people who got caught in whatever explosion this was and turned after they burned to death.

“Mikasa!” I hear Furlan come up behind me and I grind to a holt, the building in front of me making my stomach lurch.

“Oh my God…” My voice was so small out in the open, the sounds of collapsing debris and crackling flames filling the rest of the atmosphere. More and more bodies stumbled around the sight, flesh charred beyond recognition, walkers still moving with clothes on fire and skin melted to metal. “Oh my God…” I repeat it, my mind producing nothing else – just nothing…

There was nothing…

“Mikasa…” Furlan takes a step closer to the edge of the sight and looks around. I hear the others approach behind and let out similar states of shock.

“Oh God…” Sasha’s voice wobbles as she covers her face.

“Holy shit…what the fuck happened!?” Connie goes to run forwards but Furlan catches the back of his jacket, pulling him away.

“No, we should stay here. There’re walker everywhere and we can’t risk getting burnt--” I sense Furlan look to me, but I don’t remove my eyes from the black husk of a building that stands in front of us.

There was nothing…

Nobody…

“—Mikasa…” His voice was so quiet, and I knew – I knew what was coming… “Mikasa, we need to leave, there’s nothing here…”

Nothing…

“—I’m so sorry…” I shake my head, the tears already escaping – I felt sick. “…but there’s nobody here, whatever happened it took the whole lot out.”

“It must have been one hell of an explosion…” Annie whistles lightly but her face is sad – no doubt part of her mourning Reiner. I glance to my friends, knowing they’re all feeling what I’m feeling – at least some semblance of it at least. I turn back to the factory. Some of the walkers have started to notice our presence and stagger pathetically towards us.

“We need to leave—” Furlan tries again.

“No…” It was the first thing I’d said in a while, a non-existent whisper, everyone looking at me. “…no…” I shake my head and cover my mouth before the sob can escape. I feel my knees buckle beneath me and strong arms catch me before I hit the ground.

 _“Mikasa…”_ The voice swam in the back of my mind, all of them melding together like I was far…far away.

_“We’ve got to go now…!_

_“ – how…”_

_“-…carry her - …choice…”_

_“Too dangerous -…-out him…”_

My eyes are blurry, and I take one more look at the building before someone pulls me up…

There was nothing left…

Nobody left…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Girl's gotta love a good cliffhanger...
> 
> Tumblr - jovialjellyfishreaper


End file.
